| no i cannot handle that much responsibility and im sure i will degrade mentally if im married and have kids |
| Been in a relationship for 10 years and still not married. Not sure I particularly care either way. |
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| Marriage in itself doesn't really mean much to me (it's mainly an economic arrangement and between me and my bf I make the more money anyway), but I want to have a partner to live with. As for kids, I have no big desires, but it would suck to grow old with nobody to take care of me, so I guess getting one or two would be convenient. |
| Marriage doesn't mean anything to me but I do want a relationship with someone and live my life with him. Still trying to find that person lol. And I'm not really planning on having kids. |
| Someday I want to get married and have two kids but that will be a while from now. I just need to focus on college for now. |
| Hopefully. I'm just a bit scared about what could go wrong for now |
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| Meh, no, I don't even want to be in a relationship, let alone get married. It's too close. I find people who try to initiate conversations with me outside of publicly visible spheres to be stressful and kind of intrusive if they try to do it too regularly, even when something like feelings of intimacy are non-existent. I don't see myself as capable of handling it healthily, basically. It'd be bad for me, no matter who it was or what they'd be like, and that'd build up and I'd just become miserable with my situation and that'd suck. I already have issues with my roommate where sometimes I'll just kind of not do anything with him for days on end or only respond with nods whenever he tries telling me about something as is and then spend more time talking to other people online or irl, and he's been my best friend for about half a decade now. It's the same with people online, I'll drop convos midway through if they've gone on for too long, and if I've talked with them a lot over a short period of time I'll completely ignore anything they send me until I don't feel stressed talking to them. If I am active in one server for too long, I will kill my activity for a few days. If I don't do these things, I get really fucking tired and exhausted and stressed, and that can lead to hostile and argumentative behavior coming from me. That behavior in of itself is unhealthy, and it makes me think I wouldn't be able to function in a relationship once the dust settled and the new car smell wore off. I'd be miserable and I'd probably make them miserable too, so nobody wins long-term, everyone loses. |
ManabanJun 18, 2019 4:40 PM
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| Sure, why not. But it's never gonna happen anyways. |
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| To give an cliche ass answer. Yes, but to the right person. The #1 thing I don't want in life is to end up divorcing or separating. So much wasted time, effort, energy and money. I've seen too many failed marriages. The cycle ends here. I do want kids as well but I'm thinking much further ahead. Too young for all that shit right now. |
LoknirJun 18, 2019 9:12 PM
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| I've been married for two and a half years now. I'd like to have a child in a few years too, but finishing school comes first. |
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Loknir said: I'm pretty much the same way. I don't plan on ever getting married (so I voted no) but IF I find someone who I'm convinced beyond reasonable doubt is perfect for me I wouldn't be opposed to it.To give an cliche ass answer. Yes, but to the right person. The #1 thing I don't want in life is to end up divorcing or separating. So much wasted time, effort, energy and money. I've seen too many failed marriages. The cycle ends here. I definitively don't ever want kids though, for numerous reasons: I don't think I can handle/don't want that kind of responsibility, I'm not optimistic about their future at all, I probably shouldn't anyway for financial and mental health reasons, and I just flat out don't like kids. In the odd chance that I do ever have a wife, she better be ok with this. |
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| Nah, after Jeff Bezos' wife got 40 billion dollars for doing absolutely jack shit aside from being his wife, I'd rather not. |
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| Nah fuck that. In America you're basically involving the government when you marriage. One day you going to divorce, and that sweet, sweet money is going to look really nice for that other person that just a few years ago you deeply loved them. I always hear bad shit about it and you know what due to that fuck marriage, it always screws you over and especially if you have kids. God forbid you have kids and you have to divorce. Good luck because the kids aren't yours any more. |
| warning this idiot is a professional retard |
| It would be nice to start a family with someone I love. However, it's not really a gigantic priority for me. |
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| Well, here's some modern problems with marriage: proposing marriage while still in the honeymoon phase, lack of honesty in loveless relationships, having kids before you're married, marrying out of obligation (societal pressure, family pressure, etc.), believing that any semblance of issues or rocking the boat in a relationship warrants a breakup, and the modern culture that promotes displaying relationships as supposedly perfect through social media. People are feel the weight of needless expectations weighing down on them. I'm not saying it's easy to not be prone to being influenced by said problems, but I think it's much more preventable than people realize. All that being said, considering I'm not a cynical misanthrope nor am I stupefied by the paranoia of being fucked by the potential risks that come along with marriage, I'd say yeah, I'm down to marry and settle down with someone. Lol, on a less snarky note, marriage isn't easy, and it certainly requires patience, but I think a long-term monogamous commitment is a solid deal. Idgaf about divorce statistics and anecdotes about divorce horror stories. And if you ask, "why specifically marriage?", then here's your answer: https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/marriage-rights-benefits-30190.html |
| I'd like to get married in the eventuality I find someone I love that shares the same views on marriage as me. I'm afraid I don't see my country legalizing same-sex marriage or at least a civil partnership in the near future, so no marriage for me. |
| I don't have much desire to get married and preparing a wedding sounds stressful, idk maybe in a decade or so i will want too |
Kayn said: I'd like to get married in the eventuality I find someone I love that shares the same views on marriage as me. I'm afraid I don't see my country legalizing same-sex marriage or at least a civil partnership in the near future, so no marriage for me. That's actually one of the reasons part of me wants governmental marriage abolished. Because it seporates the concept of marriage from civil rights which I beleive could allow for more liklihood of equal rights because it divides the concept of what marriage is on a legal standpoint into multiple individual categories such as shared household, shared income, dependants, and designated legal surrogate for example. At least that's my theory on how it would work. I haven't heard of a country do this before. The whole idea is it allows churches to discriminate all they want with no legal consequences against or for any couple so that may help satisfy them. However this is similar to the approach of civil partnership only it sections it up to allow for smaller goals to reach one at a time but also in addition legal benafits for people that are not married. |
| I will think about it once I finish my studies and find a stable job, but I definitely want to get married one day and have few kids. |
tsubasa_ said: No, I've seen my parents and this was good enough for me to decide to never do the same mistake, besides I really don't understand the concept behind it ^this same for mine but more worst. and i have a bad memories / bad relationship with several woman for the past of years. (cheated-dumped-betrayed-etc.) for now i dont wanna married either do some contact/relationship with any woman. i need to focus to my goal and several thing i do. atleast for 10 years from now. ------------- but someday if its fate. i meet a wowan who make my hearts move and she also same like that. she loved me from her deepest heart and i love her from my deepest heart, then i guess i go married her. |
cl_skinnyguyJun 19, 2019 3:21 AM
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| Not any plans for it, in any possible way. |
"A half moon, it has a dark half and a bright half, just like me…", Yuno Gasai |
| I never want to be married and especially never want kids. I think they are the start of the decline of most marriages and most people should not have kids due to the massive effect each of us have on the environment. |
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| I'm a bit old-fashioned when it comes to love. If I were to find the love of my life one of these days, I'd want to marry them. And have a kid or two with them. |
| I don't think I've ever seen a more cynical batch of opinions regarding romance and marriage before this thread. |
| Marriage is too much of a risk...especially for men. >Chances of it lasting are very slim. >Even if it does last, you are stuck with the same person “until death do us part” and be real, in today’s society, you REALLY want to be stuck with the same person through your prime years as a man??? >Chances that you lose money, time, and become extremely bitter are HIGH. >God forbid you have kids, because now you are DEEPLY fucked! >Child Support, alimony, divorce settlements! No...this is all a recipe for disaster, it’s NOT worth it. |
| Yes, of course, even if the thought of things eventually crumbling terrifies me. |
| I definitely want to get married. I have everything, the perfect fiancé and a supporting family. Now if the money was there, I'd choose to be very cheesy: White dress, Winter wedding in the snow and an ice cake. And preferably both of our families would unite in the same place. |
If life ain't just a joke Then why are we laughing? If life ain't just a joke Then why am I dead? |
| Not getting married. I might raise an orphan kid when I get old like 40 or 45 years old but definitely not getting married. |
 "All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost." |
| 10 years ago I'd probably give some edgy answer, but nowayds I think it'd be cool to have children. Don't care for marriage, tho it has some nice feeling to it too. |
| Growing up in a divorce ridden climate has made me not really interested in the whole marriage thing. People treat it way to fickle these days and throw it away over nothing. I'll pass. |
| I do plan on getting married, but I do not want to have kids, sadly the girl I was engaged to previously also didn't want kids but things don't always work out. |
| If by marriage you mean finding a person that I want to spend the rest of my life with, then yes, I'd wanna get married. As for children, I don't know, I'm still too young to think about that |
| I don't really plan on getting married, I'm perfectly happy as I am now. Maybe I will in the distant future, if I find someone that I truly love and want to spend the rest of my life with. But if that doesn't happen, I'm fine with being alone. I never want to have children, though. |
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| No to both marriage and children. Marriages cost too much for what might as well end up being temporary. As for kids, its economically unwise I think. That and it sounds like a pain, even with adoption. also, overpopulation |
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| I don't make enough money to even consider relationships like that. Sure I'd like to, but I'm economically irrelevant. More than likely won't happen before I die. |
| “Loddfafnir, listen to my counsel: You will fare well if you follow it, It will help you much if you heed it. If aware that another is wicked, say so: Make no truce or treaty with foes.” - Havamal 127 |
AncapAnimeGod said: No marriage is dead. With divorce rate that we currently have and with anti-men feminist courts and laws it would be like playing russian roulette with too many bullets. The only sensible thing to do is to walk away. This. Marriage was a thing decades ago. Now, at least for males, the most rational and safe choice is to walk their own way without getting married. |
| I don't see the point in marriage nowadays. Except if it eases your life in term of taxes and administration. As for myself? I don't even see the point in having this kind of sentimental relationship as I was never interested in such matter. ^^" Children (are ugly) would be a pain in the ass even if I had the luxury of beiung able to afford one. Or rather I would be the problem: as a big failure, I would constantly try to push them to achieve things I didn't. WIthout those inconvenient, if I was making a living and all, I would rather adopt than making my own one: why should we add more on Earth in the current conditions, especially when there are already tons of them in need of a parent? Plus, it would require a minimum of sexual intercourses, something that will preferably stay "untested" for me. So... the furthest possibility would be: alone with a adoptive kid (another advantage: you skip the uninteresting phase of human life). Adnash93 said: Now, at least for males, the most rational and safe choice is to walk their own way without getting married. Why men especially? Looking so extremly artificial is already not a good sign, be it a man or a woman (or younger). darven said: despising getting married or not. "despite"? (despise makes the sentence sound quite weird ^^) Marco__B said: marrying out of obligation (societal pressure, family pressure, etc.) This kind of pressure is rather funny. At an earlier phase of life, among young students, I met peoples (particularly male ones) who keep talking about needing a girlfriend (the concept more than a particular person) like this movie idea of having some adolescent/"young adult" relationship once you're a student had become some mandatory thing. |
Rei_IIIJun 19, 2019 12:52 PM
| Most likely not. It's way too much commitment to do so. |
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| Yes and hopefully everything that comes with it just not right now |
| Well, I love the prospect of having someone you can just go back to at the end of the day and recharge yourself by just spending time together..... Sex, Cuddles, Deep conversations, Fights, Bigger fights, Reconciliation, and all the other things in between just come with the package.... but it just makes it all the more wonderful imo Having kids might seem daunting at first, but I think it's a great thing to see those little ones grow up each day :D |
Rei366 said: Adnash93 said: Now, at least for males, the most rational and safe choice is to walk their own way without getting married. Why men especially? Mostly because (if it's about marriage) men's situation is way worse than women's in terms of legal complexities, mostly in countries that belong to so called "Western world". If you analyse some court decisions or legal regulations related to family law (or generally civil law, depends on how one country treats this this sphere*) and concentrate on the aspects of marriage and everything related to it, you will see clearly that men's position is far worse. To make it as short and simple as it is possible, many Western world's courts favor women in their judicial practice and some governments even pass new laws that favor women and even discriminate men "indirectly", to blame judicial practice if anybody points that i.e. new law is discriminating one gender. Various social agendas present in medias can make this situation even worse by i.e. implying that men cannot be harassed by women or cannot be victims of domestic violence. You can write a long, several volumes long book about it, but this "discrimination" in judicial practice, if we take a brief look at several countries' and their courts' judicial practice in this materia, might be seen especially in the divorce law. In most of cases, while every case is individual, we can notice a tendency of men being treated worse in the final judgement. If there were no marriage articles, then even if a man's wife was not fair, but is not the only side being guilt of divorce, the wife is entitled to participate in - let's say - 50% of a man's wealth. By what I wrote earlier we can have a situation in which i.e. a woman betrayed her husband (wife's guilty), but her husband was working so much (husband's guilty). Mutual guilt is only slightly worse than exclusive fault, but in most countries it does not close a way to participate in each other's wealth. While that kind of situation might look silly, it's very common in that shape, but never or slightly never when that was a husband who betrayed his wife, because she was "guilty" of working too hard and neglecting their family by it. Same goes with judicial denial of paternity. In some countries it's hard to make it in time because of short deadlines and beaurocracy, and when a wife is good at cheating then she might hide everything and in the end her husband won't be aware she betrayed him and the child is not his. In case of divorce he will have to pay huge alimony for a child that is not his and was only a tool in hands of his wife to get alimony after divorce or not to loose her current husband if he got information about her betrayal. In one European country approximately 10% of fathers are not aware that they are raising a child that is not biologically their and in most of the cases their wives do know the truth, but do not tell it to their husbands. About divorces and children, apart from alimony there is one dangerous trend that is harmful mostly for children. In many countries parental care is given to women after divorce, even if a man is willing to take care of his children, he has enough money to provide care and the children like him more, mostly likely "mother because being a mother" will receive parental care's higher status, even if she is unresponsible. I saw that in the last years that tendention is slowly changing to more fair system, but it's too slow and many children might become victims of that kind of judicial practice. I know these informations might sound harsh, even though I simplified and generalized them as much as I could (I won't explain each Europe's country's family law nuances, lol, that would take too much time and this post is not short anyway), but that is our reality. Marriage can be a beutiful thing when two people are in love and can be in a mature and fair relationship, although nowadays there are less and less people like that. It's not that they disappeared, but if we compare our current world to our grandparents' or even parents' in some cases, then we will see 1) in their times there were less divorces and more happy marriages, 2) the amount of long-term marriages will be decreasing a lot. Hard to say, but in modern times if a man wants to have a peaceful life, then going into marriage is not a good way for him to go through. By the way, to avoid hypothetical offtop or, pardon my languege, shitstorm over this topic, I suggest ending it here, lol. If you want to talk more about it it's up to you. For me my post maybe is long, but is not an offtop, because it answers your question and expands my words that are clearly connected to this thread's topic. - - - - - - * After World War II, when the Iron Courtain was basically estabilished and became a fact, governments of the countries from the Western area of Europe tended to stay with their legal traditions and didn't mind having family law mixed in their civil codes, while countries from the Eastern area (Communist Bloc) were under influence of the USSR in almost all aspects, including law. Soviet law evolved from bolshevism, therefore was under control of marxism-leninism's ideology. In it they couldn't allow family law to be a part of Civil Code, explaining it (I'm gonna write it short) by implying that family law is about emotions and delicate matters of relations between family members, not about money that some parts of Civil Code are all about (like obligations, inheritance law and such). Of course that was nonsense, because family law has a lot of elements related to money that needs to have proper regulations, but whatever - their legislators did what they were ordered to do to make law like that and protect it from changes. Anyway, countries under the USSR's influence had to do "what their stronger brother asked them to do" and family law became a separate code from the Civil one. Many of them, if not all (I haven't checked if any country from Eastern Bloc after 1989 returned to old traditions), stayed after the fall of communism like that. |
AdnashJun 19, 2019 6:16 PM
| only if i still get to be in a relationship with my waifus |
| “The world is full of nice people. If you can't find one, be one.” ― Nishan Panwar 8=D ~ O: |
| Me and my girlfriend are planning to get married next spring, so yes. I'm 26 now, not a teenage incel. |
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| I wouldn't count on me getting married. I would be totally up for it if I ever found someone that I couldn't live without, but it hasn't happened yet and I'm not going to hold my breath waiting. |
| Already married and we have a newborn :) |
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