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People who don't have a girlfriend/boyfriend. What do you think is the reason behind it?

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May 18, 2017 3:05 PM
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Apr 2017
50
I'm awkward, I look awful, mental illness, I'm really shy. Men will never find me interesting.
May 18, 2017 3:25 PM

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Jun 2015
9143
Women are all the same... Rather fuck em and leave tbh.
May 18, 2017 4:20 PM

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May 2014
2605
I can't even take care of myself, that's why
May 18, 2017 4:34 PM

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Feb 2015
6845
Had one for some years, but it didn't work out. Haven't been interested in getting into another relationship since then.
May 18, 2017 4:49 PM

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Apr 2017
177
I'm too friendly so I get friendzoned like 75% of the time, but that's just who I am I'll meet the right girl one day (hopefully)

May 18, 2017 5:05 PM

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Jul 2013
2894
Most peeps at my school are dumb and ugly. Bad personality, super apathetic about things in general. Also, anime raised my standards too high. Oh and homework gets in the way too
May 18, 2017 5:26 PM

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Apr 2016
1108
Shit, reading the responses made me depressed as f. I hope you guys find someone you can be with in the future one day.
May 18, 2017 5:39 PM

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Dec 2015
326
From my last relationship until now, honestly I haven't found a girl that I really like that gets me to the point to give it my all and commit to her. Plus, I'm shy (at first), ugly, awkward... so yeah guess that doesn't help much.
May 18, 2017 8:23 PM

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Jan 2013
454
Generally because I don't even take good care of myself and my own problems, so how could I manage someone else as well?
Also because I'm not a social person, I don't want to go out on dates or have to talk to someone all the time, it's a pain.
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May 18, 2017 8:36 PM

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May 2014
139
I used to be really shy. Grew out of it. I talk to girls, but I don't really grow close to any. I have average looks, but I can make people laugh. And I think I just don't try. I don't really know what that means, but I have not attempted to get with a girl. Honestly, a lot of girls these act the same with similar personalities. The "Thot" type. I don't want any of those. Gimme a cute girl who either plays video games and/or watches anime, or is open to me doing those things and not be so uptight.

If any girl ever went out with me, I'd be totally faithful.
Nerps64May 18, 2017 8:39 PM
May 18, 2017 8:40 PM

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Jun 2008
11429
I think the most common reason is people lack proper social skills. I mean, people often end up being shy because they have a fear of saying the wrong things so they keep quiet. Been there, done that.

Another reason is if you never took the time to really understand someone, how can you possibly ever feel love? Love at first sight is typically your hormones telling you to go fuck XYZ, but real relationships are about loving people's flaws and still enjoy being around them.
May 18, 2017 8:57 PM

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May 2014
1151
pfft.......

Real girls are smelly.
"You either die an Ashita no Joe, or you live long enough to see yourself become a Naruto."
May 19, 2017 12:54 AM

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May 2015
16469
swirlydragon said:
TheBrainintheJar said:
I lack the social aggression that makes males attractive.


Are you kidding me?
Social aggression is never a good thing.
It's good that you lack it :)


That's odd. Every guy who is surrounded by women that I see has that trait.
WEAPONS - My blog, for reviews of music, anime, books, and other things
May 19, 2017 1:33 AM
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Feb 2014
17732
TheBrainintheJar said:
swirlydragon said:


Are you kidding me?
Social aggression is never a good thing.
It's good that you lack it :)


That's odd. Every guy who is surrounded by women that I see has that trait.


Because they have confidence in themselves. It has nothing to do with "aggression."
May 19, 2017 6:05 AM

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Jan 2016
1001
I prefer not to give it any more thought than I already have thus far.
May 19, 2017 6:15 AM
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Jul 2015
787
Um...there's a big difference between being single and being lonely. I'm single but I don't feel lonely at all. I don't need a relationship. I can't trust anyone enough to let myself get attached to them. Random hook ups are better

I don't trust anyone to not be a cheating bitch even if I haven't been cheated on before - I know of more than 4 guys that found their girlfriends cheating on them. Once, one even tried to cheat one of my friends with me. Like really? At least go fuck someone that your boyfriend doesn't know, you stupid cunt.

May 19, 2017 6:46 AM

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Nov 2016
1007
Not going out often outside going to school/work and I'm not the type to flirt or ask out anyone. Like how does it work I don't know but I'm expected to talk to them first.
May 19, 2017 7:49 AM

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Aug 2007
1816
Tachii said:
I think the most common reason is people lack proper social skills. I mean, people often end up being shy because they have a fear of saying the wrong things so they keep quiet. Been there, done that.

Another reason is if you never took the time to really understand someone, how can you possibly ever feel love? Love at first sight is typically your hormones telling you to go fuck XYZ, but real relationships are about loving people's flaws and still enjoy being around them.


You can have all of the basic social skills possible, you could even be funny or confident(what does this even mean anymore? It's such a vague term), but if you don't have the physical looks, you will be forever treated as just a friend.

10/10 Male Chad=" wow he's so aggressive and confident, he knows what he wants and he gets it! He's also super funny and pleasant to be around!"

4-6/10 Average male= uh, he's funny and a nice guy but I can't see myself ever dating him."

Or worse.

"y'know, he comes off kind of obnoxious or creepy, no one likes a narcissist!"



May 19, 2017 9:29 AM

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May 2017
1643
There was a time in my life when I might have wanted these things, and back then, shyness and awkwardness were barriers. I'm much older now and I've seen alot of relationships of friends, families and acquaintences come and go. After having witnessed so many disasters I consider myself quite lucky to be alone and at this point I intend to keep it that way.






May 19, 2017 11:09 AM

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Mar 2012
148
Boys around me think I am ugly and weird.
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May 19, 2017 2:05 PM

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Jun 2008
11429
Hias said:
Tachii said:
I think the most common reason is people lack proper social skills. I mean, people often end up being shy because they have a fear of saying the wrong things so they keep quiet. Been there, done that.

Another reason is if you never took the time to really understand someone, how can you possibly ever feel love? Love at first sight is typically your hormones telling you to go fuck XYZ, but real relationships are about loving people's flaws and still enjoy being around them.


You can have all of the basic social skills possible, you could even be funny or confident(what does this even mean anymore? It's such a vague term), but if you don't have the physical looks, you will be forever treated as just a friend.

10/10 Male Chad=" wow he's so aggressive and confident, he knows what he wants and he gets it! He's also super funny and pleasant to be around!"

4-6/10 Average male= uh, he's funny and a nice guy but I can't see myself ever dating him."

Or worse.

"y'know, he comes off kind of obnoxious or creepy, no one likes a narcissist!"

I'd say that's incorrect. There's a bunch of average looking guys successful in relationships. Now obviously if you think you're ugly and/or that lowers your confidence, then yeah, you won't be in a relationship anytime soon.

Like, sure, I'm not saying looks don't matter, but it also doesn't matter as much as you think it does.
May 19, 2017 2:29 PM

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Aug 2016
731
I've been single for quite some time after a very painful breakup. I've been single because i just diden't want to feel that again, but after a long time i'm over that, i'm now emotionally ready to be in a relationship again.

The breakup was not all bad tho, i've learned many things because of it. And i'm sure that sooner or later the girl i'm meant to be with will appear :)
May 19, 2017 2:41 PM
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Apr 2014
2999
I've had a gf before but we broke up years ago. Reason I don't have one now is because I can't afford one and even then I like my alone time. I save myself time and money.

Once I feel confident enough with where I am in my life, then I'll get a companion. As of now, relationships would just be a waste of time and a burden to me.
May 19, 2017 4:50 PM

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Aug 2016
350
i'm off to Malta to study abroad for a year as a part of my college degree
so for the last year or so i've not bothered with relationships as i'll only be leaving Ireland anyways

slán abhaile corcaigh
Níl aon tinteán mar do thinteán féin

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Currently stealing your heart,
your women and also your job


May 19, 2017 4:55 PM

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Oct 2013
1774
I'm not sure, but it's hard to get along with me.

First of all I'm still pretty young (17) so I guess I still have time, but for now (well this is the time couples are starting to form), I am extremely "weird", or just don't fit into my school.

I love anime, almost nobody from my school watches it.

I don't really like sports (I do swim once a week tho), the rest of the guys are all over sports

I'm really sensitive, so it's hard to really put up a relationship with a girl, I will always overanalyze things and worry and get hurt etc. etc.

I am looking for a sensitive girl like me, and a huge bonus would be if she watches anime as well- since I think it can be extremely good if we have the same hobbies and well.

I'm really different from everybody. I never go to parties, I don't like all this dancing and loud music, it looks "childish" to me.

Because of being bullied in elementary school I've growed up mentally extremely fast (That's also why I'm not part of parties)

I also don't drink alcohol at all, while many around me do.

I want to have a GF, it sounds so cool. I want to have a girl to be there for me, and I'll be there for her. :(
May 19, 2017 5:48 PM

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Mar 2016
18
Haven't really met anyone around me yet. Hopefully that will change when I got to university in the fall.
May 19, 2017 6:04 PM

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Mar 2016
28727
Eh. Because I don't want one. And most people offline call me disgusting and scary.
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May 19, 2017 6:42 PM

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Aug 2016
886
Too shy, too "weird," too cynical, too quiet. All around too not-alpha.
May 19, 2017 6:43 PM

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Aug 2007
1816
Tachii said:
I'd say that's incorrect. There's a bunch of average looking guys successful in relationships.

Like, sure, I'm not saying looks don't matter, but it also doesn't matter as much as you think it does.


I guess there are, but how many of those average looking guys are 'confident'? Honestly, I'm tired of people using the confidence meme when it comes to lack of relationships or physical intimacy. I bet there are tons of couples and people in relationships that have people struggling with confidence or some other mental problem.

Now obviously if you think you're ugly and/or that lowers your confidence, then yeah, you won't be in a relationship anytime soon.


Yeah, thanks for rubbing salt in that wound :x



May 19, 2017 7:49 PM

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Jun 2008
11429
Hias said:
Tachii said:
I'd say that's incorrect. There's a bunch of average looking guys successful in relationships.

Like, sure, I'm not saying looks don't matter, but it also doesn't matter as much as you think it does.


I guess there are, but how many of those average looking guys are 'confident'? Honestly, I'm tired of people using the confidence meme when it comes to lack of relationships or physical intimacy. I bet there are tons of couples and people in relationships that have people struggling with confidence or some other mental problem.

Now obviously if you think you're ugly and/or that lowers your confidence, then yeah, you won't be in a relationship anytime soon.


Yeah, thanks for rubbing salt in that wound :x

It's not a meme though. You can find tons of these average looking guys everywhere in a relationship if you go on say, public transit in any metropolitan area lol

I'm also not sure why you bring the mental health piece into it. Just because there's people like the ones you described means... there isn't confident average looking guys? I don't really see where you're going with that.
May 19, 2017 8:09 PM

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Aug 2007
1816
Tachii said:
It's not a meme though. You can find tons of these average looking guys everywhere in a relationship if you go on say, public transit in any metropolitan area lol

I'm also not sure why you bring the mental health piece into it. Just because there's people like the ones you described means... there isn't confident average looking guys? I don't really see where you're going with that.


To put all of this in simpler terms, I just don't believe you or anyone that claims confidence is the key to a relationship. We're all only human and I highly doubt every boyfriend or girlfriend out there has this indestructible willpower to accomplish anything they want.

I just used it as an example, because so many people go on and on about confidence and attaining stable relationships, but nobody is perfect and we all have issues.

You make it sound like it's the easiest thing in the world and it's just common sense to you.


May 19, 2017 8:30 PM

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Aug 2014
1681
From my romance experience it's more like i am not ready for it.
If it's by any means getting a girlfriend i would like to marry her, simple as that. I don't want somekind of dumb relationship that felt so edgy and only happens because social network purposes.

Not a really a shy type, friends said i am Tsundre type.
As one of the natural type normally people comes to me,confess or sometimes their attitude could be seen changes around you.
Ofc it might be Bullshits but i was in a 2 year special class high school with 20 student in it (11 of them is a girl) i managed get 10 of them to have a feeling for me, some did confess but almost like the harem stuff, you can't accept it because it'll ruin your relationship with other girls (at least as a good friend) and boys ofc.

Then later in college same stuff happened again, idk why.

It even repeats in my working office.

I kinda felt bad for them, i guess i am just not honest with my feelings.

For addition some of them is older than me..
Also some teacher said the same thing when i was on highschool which felt disturbing in real life
May 19, 2017 8:49 PM
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Jul 2018
564612
To give a fuck or not to give a fuck, that, my friend... is the question.

May 19, 2017 9:06 PM

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Jun 2015
65
Hm. Well, i guess mine would be that i stopped caring. I started "dating" around 13 and stopped around 19. I have had 5 girlfriends. Three of them lived close by and the other 2 were a bit far, with one being out of state. I guess i just got what i wanted out of dating and turned my interest back into what i enjoyed the most, entertainment. For me that would be games, anime and going out whenever i want without having to think about what another may say when i got back or while i'm in the middle of a show/game. When it comes down to it i started looking at dating more as a chore than something enjoyable.

Haha, now that i think about it i haven't been dating in 6-ish years now :O Sort of makes me feel old knowing that most people normally settle down and have kids before they reach my age but at the same time i can't look back and say i regret what i have done with my time. I have spent my time in a way i enjoy and to me that is what is important. :)
May 19, 2017 9:17 PM

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Mar 2015
808
I'm way too quiet and apparently have watched too much anime.

I believe I also have some personality problems.

I'm also quite young.
woah there
May 19, 2017 10:57 PM

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Mar 2014
2275
I live on Tatooine and I don't really connect with most people. A lot of girls want me apparently, but that at this point in my life I want either casual sex or a long term relationship and the latter is almost impossible to find because having met somebody who I could potentially spend the rest of my life with, I'm not going to settle for less than that and I've yet to find anybody else who can fulfill that role yet.
May 19, 2017 11:37 PM
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Jul 2016
852
The biggest reason is that I have yet to meet any women who are my type. This is largely because the circles I'm involved in by necessity don't exactly attract the type of women I'm interested in.

Believe it or not, engineering departments aren't exactly bursting with artistically inclined, colorful, kindhearted women who share my passion for moving fiction. For some reason, they're all far more focused on math, science, and the like. Who'd have thunk, right?
PhendrusMay 19, 2017 11:40 PM
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May 19, 2017 11:47 PM

Online
Jul 2016
8819
Because I want things that I can show off first to impress them, so I don't go out looking to meet anyone until then.
IpreferEcchiMay 19, 2017 11:50 PM
May 20, 2017 12:01 AM

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Aug 2014
1013
girls don't like me because they think i'm an ugly fucking piece of shit and i should kill myself

penis lol
May 20, 2017 12:56 AM

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Apr 2017
103
Girls are sometimes at first interesting in me but if they know me better I get pretty friendzoned pretty fast.

But that's no problem. I had enough relationships and don't want any more. Even if the qtest girl would ask me to be with her I would pretty much deny.

There is a type of girls that I like, but I don't think they exist in reality.
Very loyal, but not ultra-clinging. Someone you don't have to give all your free minutes but still doesn't cheat on you. A girl who is intelligent and as crazy as me. And with a huge vareity of fetishes.
She should be a bit Tsundere but just a bit. So she is not easy but still not one of these arrogant bitches.

But yeah, the life is not 2D, so I am pretty sure this girl doesn't exist.
And therefore I don't even want a girlfriend.
Oh, and even If she'd exist, she would pretty sure friendzone me and I would hang myself. So I better don't search after her.
May 20, 2017 1:37 AM

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May 2015
16469
Satania- said:
TheBrainintheJar said:


That's odd. Every guy who is surrounded by women that I see has that trait.


Because they have confidence in themselves. It has nothing to do with "aggression."


It's not just confidence, it's the aggression that allows you to go for your target, to initiate contact and things. That's why they're so attractive.
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May 20, 2017 1:40 AM
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Jul 2018
564612
just because somebody doesn't have a partner doesn't mean they are lonely.
having a partner is more draining rather than exciting for me so i'm just single
May 20, 2017 2:01 AM

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Jun 2015
621
First - busy working.
Second - terrible personality .
Third - I'm not the type to start a conversation.
Fourth - Always inside home during my free time.
Fifth - I'm aware that I can't prioritize it.
May 20, 2017 3:27 AM

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Apr 2011
1386
I have absolutely no interest in a relationship whatsoever, and I cannot see myself ever being paired up with another human being. I bear no sexual desire at all, and to be tied to another would only come with inconveniences for me, as I am not fond of people.

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May 20, 2017 3:28 AM
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Dec 2014
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I've been in multiple failed relationships - shit happens. It can be tied back to anxiety/depression usually, but even know i'm in Uni with barely any time for myself. I honestly would love to find someone thats interested in me, despite their intrests. They don't have to like what I like, even if thats a plus, I just want some good chemistry to build up on with each other, like just we understand each other or she is very kind to me, etc. something we can build a foundation of trust on. I hope that person will roll around in the future, but for now, school comes first.
May 20, 2017 3:59 AM

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Jan 2010
6533
1. I'm shy
2. Probably awkward too especially around opposite gender
3. Not really interested
4. Rarely hang out with friends
5.
Kisaragi said:
I can't even take care of myself, that's why




Seriously I have zero experience in this and I'll probably fall for whoever the first person to give me attention and treat me kindly.
May 20, 2017 6:18 AM

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Jun 2008
11429
Hias said:
Tachii said:
It's not a meme though. You can find tons of these average looking guys everywhere in a relationship if you go on say, public transit in any metropolitan area lol

I'm also not sure why you bring the mental health piece into it. Just because there's people like the ones you described means... there isn't confident average looking guys? I don't really see where you're going with that.


To put all of this in simpler terms, I just don't believe you or anyone that claims confidence is the key to a relationship. We're all only human and I highly doubt every boyfriend or girlfriend out there has this indestructible willpower to accomplish anything they want.

I just used it as an example, because so many people go on and on about confidence and attaining stable relationships, but nobody is perfect and we all have issues.

You make it sound like it's the easiest thing in the world and it's just common sense to you.
I mean, it's not wrong though. So I'm still not sure what you're actually against in my replies. Confidence and good social skills *will* get you relationships, and yeah, not all relationships are due to solely confidence. I haven't argued for this and it should've be fairly obvious. It's the same point I've been raising with looks. You also don't have to be good looking to be in a relationship.

Currently, from what I got out of your replies, and it's been somewhat inconsistent, it's that you don't think average looking people can get into a relationship... and you also don't think confidence can get you a relationship either. It all sounds rather negative to me. From what I've been replying, I've been saying tons of average looking people can get into relationships (and they are in relationships), and that confidence can certainly play a role in helping with that. Nowhere did I explicitly state confidence is the *only* reason an average person could get into a relationship, nor did I state it's the end-be-all of all relationships. I'm really not sure where you're pulling all these words, but surely I haven't personally identified with stating them.

Last of all, nor am I stating you have to be some kinda confident God to attain a relationship. But if you're like someone who's depressed and lacks self-esteem, it's not rocket science you'll find it much harder to be in a relationship compared to someone who's sociable, have some confidence, and isn't afraid of failing once in a while asking girls/guys to hang with you.

To give you a tl;dr, my stance is that *anyone* can find themselves in a relationship, and looks, while important for some people, isn't the only reason, nor is confidence. But what I think is the most important is being open to opportunities, rather than artificially shutting them down whether it's due to self-esteem reasons, being afraid to fail, or whatever. And in order to be open, people need to get off their horse sometimes and assume a bunch of XYZ factors matter that much in finding someone, when they don't have to be. XYZ factors such as you have to be good looking, or have a stable job, etcetc.
TachiiMay 20, 2017 6:26 AM
May 20, 2017 6:19 AM

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8848
Antisocial. I can't be bothered to talk to people, except on a work/business basis.
Be thankful for the wisdom granted to you.
May 20, 2017 6:25 AM

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Mar 2012
5238
I do have a girlfriend now, but as for why I didn't get one in high school? I was a weird kid and I couldn't talk to girls. Plus even if I did know how to talk to girls I was a raging misogynist during my late teens so I'd probably screw up and say something dumb.

It wasn't until I left school where I became more confident in who I was, started presenting myself better and learned how to make meaningful relationships.
SeibaaHomuMay 20, 2017 7:03 AM
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