| well, if rondom stranger called me like that on streat, i would call police too... i am not even female... |
 "If taking responsibility for a mistake that cannot be undone means death, it's not that hard to die. At least, not as hard as to live on." |
| a womanz called me that before sexual harrass very traumatized |
Moog said: Poor grandparents and old people, lol. The suffering for them will end sooner though. |
    |
| Then again, why would you call that way someone you don't know well, or even at all? Personally I wouldn't get that offended, but it reminds me of creepy, middle-aged neighbors, so yeah, not a fan of it either. I don't think I'd call any guy similarly, if he wasn't my boyfriend or at least closer friend :v |
  |
maluhia said: Why is OP baiting everyone so hard lol.. I see you there. Looking at my bait... Thinking about it... contemplating if you should take a bite of my succulent, moist and lovingly crafted bait. You must have thought to yourself "I'll just take a quick look, better yet I'll warn everyone about the bait then surely no one else will ever take this bait... I might even have it all to myself..." Soon a quick look turned into a nibble and before you knew it... You ate MY BAIT. Sorry its late here >_> |
 "The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." -Friedrich Nietzsche |
| Well, it seems popular there in "'Murica". It's just a difference of culture, as we find it weird and creepy. So, from our standards, it would kind of count (just a bit) as "sexual harassment" but I don't think anyone would go that far, but rather take it as a form of flirting. I've always found it a bit weird, to call strangers that way. It should be used for relatives and close friends only. But anyway, I think they are going too far with that. If there's no harm being done, why would they bother? |
 |
 But seriously, they're just blowing it out of proportions at this point. But considering all the stuff that's happened, this isn't really all that surprising anymore. |
| I miss my GIFs of old ass memes. |
Bayek said: Both of those terms are about as creepy as when a girl calls her man "daddy." Tnx that was a really good point daddy |
  πππ'π π³π΄ππ΄π²ππΈπ
π΄ πππππππ π³π΄ππ΄π²ππΈπ
π΄ ππππ ! π π πππ πππππ πππ ππ’πππ πππππππ ! |
Maneki-Mew said: There are also many middle aged and older women, who call you similar nicknames, because they want to be nice and like you. I had a great female, older prof and she called me and others everytime sweetheart etc. in a very likeable way. It really depends on the person and situation. I also knew an old man, who calls me that very often, because I reminded him of his granddaughter. It's weird, but well... if he feels better lol. This. As a relatively young (30yo) woman I hear things like "dear child", "oh you little sweetheart" or "sweet little thing" from elder patients, both men and women. I don't think here in Finland anyone younger than 70yo calls any other person non-romantically a darling, a sweetheart or dear and the age gap is most likely at least 30 years when they do that. If anyone else does it it's almost 100% in a sarcastic way. |
Eight-Man said: Remember, be an artist, not an autist. "If anything simply cannot go wrong it will anyway." ~ Murphy's 5th law |
| Bruh your examples are terrible, calling someone "sweetheart" isn't the issue here, the issues are being sarcastic and condescending towards someone in a professional meeting based on their age and position in the first case and being purposely derogatory and taking the piss out of a customer when they complained in the 2nd one. Saucy said: Whoa whoa whoa. Calm down. This is just an extension of anti sexual harassment movements. None of this is new. People are just bringing more attention to other forms of harassment that women experience in the workplace. That doesn't mean that being called "sweetheart" in a normal flow of conversation means that it's harassment. If you notice, these incidents are accompanied by other condescending and disrespectful behaviors. There are clearly instances where someone is being rude, unprofessional, and disrespectful. I doubt that any reasonable woman would be offended if someone casually or endearingly calls her "sweetheart" or "darling" when they're being pleasant to her. In UK, it's pretty common to tag "love" when talking to women. The problem, in most Western countries, is when people do it condescendingly or disrespectfully. It's not much different from if you're male, a woman calling you "boy" as she condescends you. I hardly think most men would find that "endearing." Context is the big player here. You cannot just say that women can't call you "hun" no matter what if they want to complain about being called "sweetheart." If the tone is endearing or casual, it's fine. In a public setting between strangers, it's bound to be misinterpreted by some, in which case you should maybe reserve it for people you know well or if they ask you to stop, actually stop. I'm sure there are overly sensitive people out there who will get outraged at being called "sweetheart" in any context by anyone, but it's important to be reasonable. If the person isn't being disrespectful, maybe lay off the outrage. This is a real problem that many women face in the workplace and it spans months if not years. I don't see why it's a problem to call attention to it, especially when people actually ARE being disrespectful and condescending in these cases. Hey a decent response in this thread, I thank you for that. I don't want to be quick to judge but I'd bet a lot of users in this thread posted their reply based on the poster's interpretation of the articles without reading the articles themselves to judge whether he was blowing this out of proportion or not. |
| Why would you call someone other than your partner that in the first place though? But who cares really |
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| "Honey" should be reserved for prostitutes and "sweetheart" for grandmas. Men who use those terms outside of pre-approved contexts should be (depending on the severity of the offense) fined, jailed, or even extra-judicially murdered. |
LoneWolf said: @Josh makes me sad to call myself Canadian. |
| in civilized countries, people call women by their name (what a concept, isn't it? people actually have names!) a random guy calling a girl / woman a "sweetheart" is nothing short of creepy. |
| You can buy lossless digital music from your favorite Japanese artists on https://ototoy.jp/. The songs are all DRM-free and you can re-download your purchased albums as you wish. Show your support to your favorite artist if you can! ps. if you are looking for Japanese albums, you have to search it in Japanese (not romaji). Just copy and paste the name. For those who want to learn Japanese through anime Resources for learning the language |
aliquae said: Over a few years staring at women is harassment, I'm sure. Men, you should know your place! I honestly thought that was becoming a thing already. |
| If someone doesn't want to be called those things, I don't see what's the problem. These women didn't want to be called those things and the men persisted, so the women became upset. That's textbook harassment; imposing yourself on other people when they've already expressed their dissent. I think the polite thing to do is respect someone's wishes when it's not gonna cost you anything. It's better not to even give these women the time of day; they're always gonna have a problem with something if you have a penis and a Y chromosome. |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
SupremeEdgelord said: Well, i guess that i am evil incarnate now for being what i am. Yeah except OP is the one who said it is 'now considered' harassment. It might have gone without saying that under many circumstances, these terms are just fine. BUT NOOOOOOOO |
| I CELEBRATE myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you. |
| Cool beans. I guess that means it's open season on females for me. As a below-average height, baby-faced Italian male, I've been called 'hun', 'sweetie', 'darling', et al. in public my entire life - and that's in a very progressive, pro-speech/thought policing, uber sensitivity-conscious cesspool of a state. Oh, wait. I'm a white male and exempt. Fuck. |
DouluoJan 9, 2018 10:37 AM
Usagi said: Getting called "sweetheart" by a middle aged man is really creepy. I don't find it weird when an older person says it to me, though. Very old like 80's or 90's yeah sure. I will think they are just being sweet. But, where I live, being called that isn't normal. I have only heard people from the south say it. People who say "bless your heart" on reflex. Weird middle aged guy or even guy my own age (27) getting familiar with me that way? And I am married? Yeah that person is a creeper. I don't care what you guys say but pet names to women you don't know= gross. It is very patronizing. It is sexist. Sometimes people say it in the middle of an argument as a way of being flippant and dismissive towards a woman. And yeah, I have had to deal with jobs where I was called that especially after I asked for them to correct their homophobic language saying fag every other word. And yeah it was a food job. I should not have had to deal with it, especially when it was against the rules to be talking that way at work according to the orientation video. |
Energetic-NovaJan 9, 2018 12:02 PM
The anime community in a nutshell.  |
Energetic-Nova said: Usagi said: Getting called "sweetheart" by a middle aged man is really creepy. I don't find it weird when an older person says it to me, though. Very old like 80's or 90's yeah sure. I will think they are just being sweet. Weird middle aged guy or even guy my own age (27) getting familiar with me that way? And I am married? Yeah that person is a creeper. I don't care what you guys say but pet names to women= gross. It is very patronizing. It is sexist. Sometimes people say it in the middle of an argument as a way of being flippant towards a woman. And yeah, I have had to deal with jobs where I was called that especially after I asked for them to correct their homophobic language saying fag every other word. And yeah it was a food job. I should not have had to deal with it, especially when it was against the rules to be talking that way at work according to the orientation video. But I suppose you think it's okay for someone to call a male "hun" or "buddy," don't you? |
 |
Gymkata said: Cool beans. I guess that means it's open season on females for me. As a below-average height, baby-faced Italian male, I've been called 'hun', 'sweetie', 'darling', et al. in public my entire life - and that's in a very progressive, pro-speech/thought policing, uber sensitivity-conscious cesspool of a state. Oh, wait. I'm a white male and exempt. Fuck. were you called it at work? In a way to dismiss you? I honestly don't care. Those words are creepy as fuck. I also don't know where you live to where that would be considered normal. around here, saying Darling even in a relationship would be weird. |
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
Seiya said: Energetic-Nova said: Very old like 80's or 90's yeah sure. I will think they are just being sweet. Weird middle aged guy or even guy my own age (27) getting familiar with me that way? And I am married? Yeah that person is a creeper. I don't care what you guys say but pet names to women= gross. It is very patronizing. It is sexist. Sometimes people say it in the middle of an argument as a way of being flippant towards a woman. And yeah, I have had to deal with jobs where I was called that especially after I asked for them to correct their homophobic language saying fag every other word. And yeah it was a food job. I should not have had to deal with it, especially when it was against the rules to be talking that way at work according to the orientation video. But I suppose you think it's okay for someone to call a male "hun" or "buddy," don't you? I don't think it is OK at work. Which is what this law says. You should call each other by the name or staff position. My work was so bad they were calling people faggot and dyke. And when I spoke up, I was called sweetheart and honey. Would have been great if the manager was fired for doing that shit. But nope. I was. |
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
Energetic-Nova said: Seiya said: But I suppose you think it's okay for someone to call a male "hun" or "buddy," don't you? I don't think it is OK at work. Which is what this law says. You should call each other by your name or staff position. I'm disabled, and cannot work. I'm talking about women my mother's age calling men "hun" in a condescending tone, and men calling other men "buddy" with the same tone. These laws only protect females, and that's not okay. |
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Seiya said: Energetic-Nova said: I don't think it is OK at work. Which is what this law says. You should call each other by your name or staff position. I'm disabled, and cannot work. I'm talking about women my mother's age calling men "hun" in a condescending tone, and men calling other men "buddy" with the same tone. These laws only protect females, and that's not okay. I am disabled, I cannot work now. But when I did, I was called that stuff. AT WORK. If you are called that at work, go complain. It is harrassment. And maybe because it doesn't happen to men as much as your little head believes. There are laws against saying slurs like Faggot at work. Remember, complaining about it though, got me fired eventually. In life, I can simply not even associate with most people. But at a job, you are forced to be around that person for a lot longer. I don't even talk to my sister who is mean. But at a job, you have to come back or risk losing it. And you have to deal with THOSE PEOPLE again. If you want a law against calling you a name at work, go ahead and do it. but some people really are fired if they complain about such a name. |
Energetic-NovaJan 9, 2018 12:15 PM
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
Energetic-Nova said: Seiya said: I'm disabled, and cannot work. I'm talking about women my mother's age calling men "hun" in a condescending tone, and men calling other men "buddy" with the same tone. These laws only protect females, and that's not okay. I am disabled, I cannot work now. But when I did, I was called that stuff. AT WORK. If you are called that at work, go complain. It is harrassment. And maybe because it doesn't happen to men as much as your little head believes. There are laws against saying slurs like Faggot at work. Remember, complaining about it though, got me fired eventually. I'm not talking about work, I'm talking about in public. Also, it happens to males FAR MORE than females. |
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Seiya said: Energetic-Nova said: I am disabled, I cannot work now. But when I did, I was called that stuff. AT WORK. If you are called that at work, go complain. It is harrassment. And maybe because it doesn't happen to men as much as your little head believes. There are laws against saying slurs like Faggot at work. Remember, complaining about it though, got me fired eventually. I'm not talking about work, I'm talking about in public. Also, it happens to males FAR MORE than females. THIS LAW TALKS ABOUT WORK THOUGH. WHY ARE YOU BITCHING? And ummm no, it doesn't. I have a husband and he doesn't get called any of that. I have talked to my father, nope, he doesn't get called that stuff by not his wife. Sooooo I would say it is probably because you are childish? Nobody says that stuff here. NOBODY says Darling unless they are over 60 and married. |
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
Energetic-Nova said: Seiya said: I'm not talking about work, I'm talking about in public. Also, it happens to males FAR MORE than females. THIS LAW TALKS ABOUT WORK THOUGH. WHY ARE YOU BITCHING? Because nobody has the right to call me "hun" or "buddy," and I'm sick and tired of you left-wing nuts complaining that you should have special treatment. You women have it BETTER than I do. Why do you think that's okay? |
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Seiya said: Because nobody has the right to call me "hun" or "buddy," and I'm sick and tired of you left-wing nuts complaining that you should have special treatment. You women have it BETTER than I do. Why do you think that's okay? I am saying this law is about work. Not about randos. Why are you focused in on that. And you are a wingnut. Pull up your big boy pants and say you don't like it. I had an issue because they were the manager. They had more power than me. And yeah, they were a guy. |
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
Energetic-Nova said: Seiya said: Because nobody has the right to call me "hun" or "buddy," and I'm sick and tired of you left-wing nuts complaining that you should have special treatment. You women have it BETTER than I do. Why do you think that's okay? I am saying this law is about work. Not about randos. Why are you focused in on that. And you are a wingnut. No, I'm a centrist, who believes in real equality. You know nothing about equality. |
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Seiya said: Energetic-Nova said: I am saying this law is about work. Not about randos. Why are you focused in on that. And you are a wingnut. No, I'm a centrist, who believes in real equality. You know nothing about equality. yes I do. The law is about work. You keep talking about your homelife. Just tell the person off. That is what I would do. I did it at work, and I got a worse nickname, and then I was fired. I don't see how you aren't seeing how this is wrong regardless of gender but whatever. My shit was in 2008 so almost 10 years ago. It was legal in my area to fire men still for wearing make up and now it is not. And I tested dead center between McCain and Obama when I took a test, I was the only one who got dead center on issues. XD So I tested center. Granted, I am Green Party now. |
Energetic-NovaJan 9, 2018 12:28 PM
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
Energetic-Nova said: Gymkata said: Cool beans. I guess that means it's open season on females for me. As a below-average height, baby-faced Italian male, I've been called 'hun', 'sweetie', 'darling', et al. in public my entire life - and that's in a very progressive, pro-speech/thought policing, uber sensitivity-conscious cesspool of a state. Oh, wait. I'm a white male and exempt. Fuck. were you called it at work? In a way to dismiss you? Yes, every day. But I wear big boy pants and don't believe in sending people to the wall before I know their intent, background, and cultural predilections. Fortunately, such information is more easily ascertained in an intimate work setting, where putting the kybosh on pet names - if so offended - would be totally appropriate, especially when it's persistent. It's the policing of speech in public that keeps me up at night. |
DouluoJan 9, 2018 2:31 PM
Gymkata said: Yes, every day. But I wear big boy pants and don't believe in sending people to the wall before I know their intent, background, and cultural predilections. Fortunately, such information is more easily ascertained in an intimate work setting, where putting the kybosh on pet names - if so offended - would be totally appropriate, especially when it's persistent. It's the policing of speech in public that keeps me up at night. Well I got fired for complaining. So I don't blame you for just thinking it is "ok". I cannot work in a work environment where I am called dyke or sweetheart by the same person. Sadly that person was the manager. There wasn't much I could do. I guess I get the last laugh as they went out of business the following year. |
| The anime community in a nutshell. |
| Well my friend who is also female harasses me on a daily basis then. And I evidently harass a lot of people too...or maybe if I'm also female it's okay. I wonder if the women who complain about such minor things even realise they are actually making the situation for other women much worse. If they keep making such a big deal out of nothing and trying to censor everything men say, then they're not going to be respected or taken seriously when they complain about something actually worth while. |
monochrome-kiss said: Well my friend who is also female harasses me on a daily basis then. And I evidently harass a lot of people too...or maybe if I'm also female it's okay. I wonder if the women who complain about such minor things even realise they are actually making the situation for other women much worse. If they keep making such a big deal out of nothing and trying to censor everything men say, then they're not going to be respected or taken seriously when they complain about something actually worth while. Also they are making men not even want to bother anymore. |
Monad said: monochrome-kiss said: Well my friend who is also female harasses me on a daily basis then. And I evidently harass a lot of people too...or maybe if I'm also female it's okay. I wonder if the women who complain about such minor things even realise they are actually making the situation for other women much worse. If they keep making such a big deal out of nothing and trying to censor everything men say, then they're not going to be respected or taken seriously when they complain about something actually worth while. Also they are making men not even want to bother anymore. Yeah, pretty much. Can't say I blame them since I really can't be bothered with women like this. But it's annoying that women in general end up getting lumped in with these idiots. |
monochrome-kiss said: Yeah, pretty much. Can't say I blame them since I really can't be bothered with women like this. But it's annoying that women in general end up getting lumped in with these idiots. The thing is men do not have a magic ball that predicts in advance whether they are dealing with crazy or not and with so much crazy going around many started thinking: "better not bother risking it, too much pain in the ass". So that is why other women end up being lumped. It's like now you need to be going around with a sign on you saying: "Not a crazy feminist, i swear". |
Monad said: monochrome-kiss said: Yeah, pretty much. Can't say I blame them since I really can't be bothered with women like this. But it's annoying that women in general end up getting lumped in with these idiots. The thing is men do not have a magic ball that predicts in advance whether they are dealing with crazy or not and with so much crazy going around many started thinking: "better not bother risking it, too much pain in the ass". So that is why other women end up being lumped. It's like now you need to be going around with a sign on you saying: "Not a crazy feminist, i swear". I feel the same way. It's like I have to try and justify how I'm not an insane feminazi now because of people like this. I also feel sorry for a lot of men these days because literally everything they do or say is apparently "sexist" now. |
| Why people care so much of name-calling? This world is like a journey where there are many other things that we can explore, rather than bothered with temporal definition of who we are. I can call myself some other names and why should anyone and I care....hmmm |
 |
Saucy said: It's funny how people talk about "SJWs" overreacting to trivial things and yet the same people overreact to trivial things. It's almost like some of you have more in common with the people you violently despise than you think... These are not hard issues to parse if you slow down, use your brain, and stop being emotional. Nobody is claiming that all men are creepy rapists. Nobody is saying that men can never call women "darling" or "sweetheart." It's about disrespecting women in a way that is somehow seen defensible because apparently people want all or nothing. Either you can call all women "sweetheart" without repercussions, or you can't use the word at all. Why is this a dichotomy in play here. How about we just don't condescend women and pretend like using these nicknames is not condescending because they're nice words in some contexts. Yeah, no shit. They are nice words in some contexts. That doesn't mean they're nice words in all contexts. If you lack the reasoning ability to discern between when someone is being nice or condescending, then you have bigger problems. Ugh. It's like people just want to comment on things without actually using their brain to think. Just don't be a god damn dick. yet you used a male sexual organ as an insult for your own gain. STOP DISRESPECTING MEN AND OPRESSING THEM. |
 |
TomDay said: Saucy said: It's funny how people talk about "SJWs" overreacting to trivial things and yet the same people overreact to trivial things. It's almost like some of you have more in common with the people you violently despise than you think... These are not hard issues to parse if you slow down, use your brain, and stop being emotional. Nobody is claiming that all men are creepy rapists. Nobody is saying that men can never call women "darling" or "sweetheart." It's about disrespecting women in a way that is somehow seen defensible because apparently people want all or nothing. Either you can call all women "sweetheart" without repercussions, or you can't use the word at all. Why is this a dichotomy in play here. How about we just don't condescend women and pretend like using these nicknames is not condescending because they're nice words in some contexts. Yeah, no shit. They are nice words in some contexts. That doesn't mean they're nice words in all contexts. If you lack the reasoning ability to discern between when someone is being nice or condescending, then you have bigger problems. Ugh. It's like people just want to comment on things without actually using their brain to think. Just don't be a god damn dick. yet you used a male sexual organ as an insult for your own gain. STOP DISRESPECTING MEN AND OPRESSING THEM. This is where Poe's law applies........... |
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holy smack are people that dead to irony here? lol |
|
I was more pointing out the fact that based on the forum posts, irony is either everpersent or completely gone. |
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| Who even uses these? You don't use "honey" nor "sweetheart" in ANY context. That's high level cringe. |
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| TBH I call most women I meet "luv" or "Sweetheart", I never see a problem with it, I think "morning luv" or "sweetheart" is better than "morning woman". In all my years I have only ever had one person reply "I'm not your luv", to which I replied "alright then sweetheart" and they fucked off. |
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| I don't care much for it. I stray away from referring females to anything besides their name or you. |
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