Casual Discussion, You Have $10 To Build Your Ideal Partner

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Cookies said:
Your definition of "average looking" is far above mine lol, I don't think I've seen someone stretch $10 that far in my entire life you stinge. lmfao

They say life is full of compromises :p
That aside, going by categories alone doesn't seem to be very realistic. For someone in a love relationship, their partner will be ideal even if they have less categories than they could earn. It doesn't say anything about the quality of the respective category, nor about other qualities. And there's been at least one user in this thread whose partner seems to fulfill more categories than what they could get by the standards of this thread.
I am btw. curious what your and @Thanakos ' "decent looking" looks like.

@ohml: Thanks. Well, looks may play some role in determining subconsciously the quality of the genetic composition, but that's not everything. The vast majority of people is at least decent looking. If someone is perceived as ugly by some people, then it's often because they are disliked by them. Love usually turns the own partner into the most beautiful person.
I'm not the one who came up with the scenario, so you better ask Cookies, lol

NoboruJul 3, 2019 7:27 AM

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Jul 3, 2019 1:17 PM

#56

Thanakos

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Noboru said:

Cookies said:
Your definition of "average looking" is far above mine lol, I don't think I've seen someone stretch $10 that far in my entire life you stinge. lmfao

They say life is full of compromises :p
That aside, going by categories alone doesn't seem to be very realistic. For someone in a love relationship, their partner will be ideal even if they have less categories than they could earn. It doesn't say anything about the quality of the respective category, nor about other qualities. And there's been at least one user in this thread whose partner seems to fulfill more categories than what they could get by the standards of this thread.
I am btw. curious what your and @Thanakos ' "decent looking" looks like.

@ohml: Thanks. Well, looks may play some role in determining subconsciously the quality of the genetic composition, but that's not everything. The vast majority of people is at least decent looking. If someone is perceived as ugly by some people, then it's often because they are disliked by them. Love usually turns the own partner into the most beautiful person.
I'm not the one who came up with the scenario, so you better ask Cookies, lol

Instagram is kinda down today so I can't come up with better examples, but here's what I call 'decent looking':

(that smile is so alluring)

And yes you might remember her from a 2014 meme. Similarly, that 'creepy girlfriend' meme, yea she was pretty decent looking too. Decent looking is basically fuckable. If you add in some personal qualities like intelligence, sense of humor, education etc, then that could make her wifeable too. Your 'decent looking' treads into the 'very good looking' category, for me; in fact, she could become a model, easily, given makeup and a good photographer.

Jul 3, 2019 1:29 PM

#57

ColtBuntline

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Nov 2013

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Good looking, romantic, and smart.

“Right is right even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it.”
― Saint Augustine

Jul 3, 2019 1:41 PM

#58

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Thanakos said:
Instagram is kinda down today so I can't come up with better examples[...]

Instagram works for me perfectly fine, but I've read the news that they seem to have (had) problems.

Thanakos said:
And yes you might remember her from a 2014 meme.

Your decent looking is good looking to me, with the option to be very good looking with the right clothes and with a better photo. Also, she seems to be wearing makeup. I don't recall her, though.

Not sure what you mean with "creepy girlfriend meme", but if you mean her, then that's not even a real person, is it? Or is just the identity as "Overly Attached Girlfriend" which is fictional while the person playing her is real and looks like that?

NoboruJul 3, 2019 1:45 PM

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Jul 3, 2019 1:50 PM

#59

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BallistikJuice said:
@Noboru, I knew a few people throughout my life who were really picky, and all of them end up with really below average partners and some of them only met 'em when they were already over 40. I'm not saying that you shouldn't be picky but you know...

I would say the best type would be when you just feel comfy with her/him that's all it matters, and as long as they are not completely ugly, crazy, drunk or drug addicts(these behaviors should be avoided like the plague).

People, who are overly picky live in their dream worlds or need excuses to avoid intimacy.
I did that back then to avoid three relationships with guys, who confessed to me, because I didn't want to anyway. Then, with my actual two ex boyfriends, I suddenly had no "excuse" of this kind to avoid a relationship with them.
Or very picky people are very young or not experienced and don't know anything about how attraction and love works.

Depends how they act and if they want to change. Everyone could end in an addiction, after a trauma for example. You might say "no, not me!", but you never know for sure.

Jul 3, 2019 1:52 PM

#60

Thanakos

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Noboru said:

Thanakos said:
Instagram is kinda down today so I can't come up with better examples[...]

Instagram works for me perfectly fine, but I've read the news that they seem to have (had) problems.

Thanakos said:
And yes you might remember her from a 2014 meme.

Your decent looking is good looking to me, with the option to be very good looking with the right clothes and with a better photo. Also, she seems to be wearing makeup. I don't recall her, though.

Not sure what you mean with "creepy girlfriend meme", but if you mean her, then that's not even a real person, is it? Or is just the identity as "Overly Attached Girlfriend" which is fictional while the person playing her is real and looks like that?

Yea I mean that overly attached girlfriend girl. But man idk, the og pics you posted on page 1 were just... damn.

Jul 5, 2019 11:00 AM

#61

Kotoneko-chan

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Good looking, romantic, caring and likes memes x3

Jul 7, 2019 12:33 AM

#62

-Mayhem-

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3757

I only need 9 dollars. Good looking and rich. That's all. Applies on both genders for me since I'm bi.

Obviously, this is just for fun, in reality things would be much more different since I'm interested more in someone's personality, but looks aswell.

Jul 7, 2019 1:04 AM

#63

Flamexes

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241

Lets see...
Good Looking: +$4
Smart: +$4
Romantic: +$2

Jul 7, 2019 1:13 AM

#64

traed

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47629

My ideal partner would be priceless yet valuable to me.

Jul 7, 2019 3:40 AM

#65

ShizukanaTakeshi

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I would pay 8 bucks for a gal who

- is caring ($3)
- likes anime ($2)
- is smart ($4)

but honestly,

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Jul 7, 2019 5:48 AM

#66

Jokuc

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Caring $3
Smart $4
Funny $3

The fact that I neither pick Hates or Likes anime means I can then nag at them every day to watch anime with me!!

It's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer.

Jul 7, 2019 6:31 AM

#67

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Thanakos said:
Yea I mean that overly attached girlfriend girl. But man idk, the og pics you posted on page 1 were just... damn.

Oh I see. Still, I find the girls you've posted or mentioned (even that "overly attached girlfriend") better looking than my "average" examples.

Maneki-Mew said:

People, who are overly picky live in their dream worlds or need excuses to avoid intimacy.
I did that back then to avoid three relationships with guys, who confessed to me, because I didn't want to anyway. Then, with my actual two ex boyfriends, I suddenly had no "excuse" of this kind to avoid a relationship with them.

If you don't mind me asking: what has been different about the guys who have at least managed to get into a love relationship with you?

traed said:
My ideal partner would be priceless yet valuable to me.

That's a very good mindset, though I'm not sure about the "ideal" part. I would think of any romantic partner as a priceless treasure, regardless of whether or not she ends up being the ideal one for me or not.

RedWolfGhost said:
I would pay 8 bucks for a gal who

- is caring ($3)
- likes anime ($2)
- is smart ($4)

but honestly,

That would make 9 bucks, not 8 (still within the limits of the game, though)

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Jul 7, 2019 7:17 AM

#68

ShizukanaTakeshi

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ah damn, I always suck at math or anything dealing with numbers

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Jul 7, 2019 9:40 AM

#69

Comtriler

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I will go with:
Good looking
romantic
smart.

Jul 7, 2019 3:06 PM

#70

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Noboru said:

Maneki-Mew said:

People, who are overly picky live in their dream worlds or need excuses to avoid intimacy.
I did that back then to avoid three relationships with guys, who confessed to me, because I didn't want to anyway. Then, with my actual two ex boyfriends, I suddenly had no "excuse" of this kind to avoid a relationship with them.

If you don't mind me asking: what has been different about the guys who have at least managed to get into a love relationship with you?

My exes are two close friends of mine.

The three other guys, who confessed to me... I knew them, but not that well and I didn't like them that much. They were not the kind of person I could deal with their personality and I didn't feel comfortable around them. Not like "they could attack me" or any kind of this level of feeling uncomfortable, I just didn't like being around them for too long.

I hardly could explain that, but for one of these guys the reason was that I didn't like his friends at all. He invited me once and they weren't bad people or something like that. I just wanted to leave very soon, because that was not my world. Very gross at times, too much alcohol involved etc. He was on a decent level I could manage, he wasn't that gross as them.

These are some of these aspects I really do look and care for. "Good looks" etc... of course you don't want to feel repulsed, but stuff like the circle of friends they have is really important, imo.
It's 1. a little bit of a mirror, who you are and 2. you have to get along with them. They also should include you, at best like you always have been a part of them... if you haven't been from the same friend circle.

I personally have NEVER seen a (heterosexual) couple lasting longer than three, four years, if they have this cliched "she has her girl friends, he has his guy friends, all of them doing stereotypical stuff with them, and they don't like the friends of their partners."
I write heterosexual, because I don't know others with exclusively friends of their own gender. And most heterosexual people I know also have mixed friend circles, so I guess only befriending people of your own gender and also separating friend circles is dying here haha

To say "they should be good-looking, smart, caring etc." that's basic, of course they should be, but there is more important stuff and also stuff you couldn't explain to others. I also don't know the reason why, I don't like being around some people, even if they are pretty decent. It's just chemistry.

removed-userJul 7, 2019 3:38 PM

Jul 7, 2019 3:33 PM

#71

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@Maneki-Mew: Thank you for your elaborate response.

So basically, your ex-bfs have taken the time to properly get to know you before making their advances. That or they might have developed feelings only much later.

I've taken a mental note that the respective friend circle seems to be important, too. I have only read somewhere that how someone treats their own parents (especially the one of the opposite sex) might be very well how they will treat their spouse (heterosexual pairing) later on.

In the end, being able to feel comfortable around the people that are important to either person and treating everyone good might be the key to any successful relationship.

If it's not too personal a question, but are you still friends with either of your exes?

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Jul 7, 2019 3:47 PM

#72

traed

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Noboru said:

traed said:
My ideal partner would be priceless yet valuable to me.

That's a very good mindset, though I'm not sure about the "ideal" part. I would think of any romantic partner as a priceless treasure, regardless of whether or not she ends up being the ideal one for me or not.

The ideal is a good relationship and strong feelings for eachother not a specific set of traits.

Jul 7, 2019 3:54 PM

#73

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Noboru said:
@Maneki-Mew: Thank you for your elaborate response.

So basically, your ex-bfs have taken the time to properly get to know you before making their advances. That or they might have developed feelings only much later.

I've taken a mental note that the respective friend circle seems to be important, too. I have only read somewhere that how someone treats their own parents (especially the one of the opposite sex) might be very well how they will treat their spouse (heterosexual pairing) later on.

In the end, being able to feel comfortable around the people that are important to either person and treating everyone good might be the key to any successful relationship.

If it's not too personal a question, but are you still friends with either of your exes?

You're welcome. ^^

Well... I didn't want a relationship there at all, so I made up reasons for my own for the other two, who I liked somehow, but not that much to get into a relationship / couldn't deal with.

Then, with my ex boyfriends, I didn't have one of those reasons why I couldn't try it. Neither explainable reasons nor "overly picky" reasons, like you would build your dream partner with a check box.
Truth was, I didn't feel attracted on a sexual level to them and that was the main reason we broke up soon. Both times. ^^"

No, that's absolutely okay, don't worry. I'm still close to them. It's just like that one if them isn't in the country for two or three years, but I keep contact at least once a week. Btw my girlfriend (and theirs also do lol) actually knows I still have some kind of "feelings" for them and likes them too so far. She hasn't seen them a lot.
Personally I dislike the idea of kicking people out of your life, because the relationship didn't work. That's a strange version of love in my eyes. If I do, I want to keep them in my life, as long as they didn't do something I couldn't forgive or so.

Yes, I think so. Others might be more "tolerant", if their partner only has friends they don't like, but I couldn't stand that. It's like being excluded of a big part of their life. Not that I want to be present all the time and don't let them do something without me, but it doesn't feel good, if you not know or like their close friends at all.

And being comfortable around your partner is one most important aspect to me.

Jul 7, 2019 3:59 PM

#74

Starchaser

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Nov 2017

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Sporty, good looking, likes anime, funny, romantic, smart, caring....

Golly, can't get my ideal partner with these funds. I guess I'll spend my 10 dollars on a nice Yu-Gi-Oh! card instead!

Jul 7, 2019 4:03 PM

#75

MildlyAesthetic

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Likes memes x10 ___________________

Do you
‎🚨 hear the sirens? ‎🚨

🏃🏃

Jul 7, 2019 4:11 PM

#76

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traed said:
The ideal is a good relationship and strong feelings for eachother not a specific set of traits.

Good relationship to the respective partner, to the own social circle, to the other social circle... but yeah, I wasn't that keen on traits in this thread, anyway. Just wanted to give another possible calculation :p

@Maneki-Mew: wow, thank you again for being so open about it. This is valuable input for me ^^

Personally I dislike the idea of kicking people out of your life, because the relationship didn't work.

I wish to find and get close to people who have your mindset in that matter. That even if I went with someone in a love relationship and it just happened to not work out, that we could still stay friends.

And being comfortable around your partner is one most important aspect to me.

Agreed. You should feel well in each other's presence. Though to get to the point, you have to have mutual interest in each other and here is where possible good candidates might get filtered out if you set your wish list too high. Clicking with someone might happen with the person you would expect the least.

♗

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Jul 7, 2019 4:44 PM

#77

RIP CE, thank you and fuck you for bringing Rule 7 that ultimately killed you and this shithole

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Noboru said:

traed said:
The ideal is a good relationship and strong feelings for eachother not a specific set of traits.

Good relationship to the respective partner, to the own social circle, to the other social circle... but yeah, I wasn't that keen on traits in this thread, anyway. Just wanted to give another possible calculation :p

@Maneki-Mew: wow, thank you again for being so open about it. This is valuable input for me ^^

Personally I dislike the idea of kicking people out of your life, because the relationship didn't work.

I wish to find and get close to people who have your mindset in that matter. That even if I went with someone in a love relationship and it just happened to not work out, that we could still stay friends.

And being comfortable around your partner is one most important aspect to me.

Agreed. You should feel well in each other's presence. Though to get to the point, you have to have mutual interest in each other and here is where possible good candidates might get filtered out if you set your wish list too high. Clicking with someone might happen with the person you would expect the least.

No problem, as long as people don't want to know explicit sexual details or something, I don't see a problem to share that.

I think it became part of our culture that "staying friends" is a bad thing and that nobody could be sincere about it. I don't fear breakups that much, if I know everything will be alright. Of course, you still fear them, but they are not that hard, if you don't have to deal with the pain of losing them or getting involved into insane drama.

Yes and no. I think, there are some rules why you would fall for someone. It's about the traits you appreciate and your mindset. Differences are absolutely okay, but I couldn't get along with someone, who gives a shit about others etc. or doesn't care for their appearance, even if it sounds superficial, I couldn't get physically close to someone, who isn't well-groomed and somewhat attractive.
So, at least I could point out, what I'm definitely NOT looking for lol.

Jul 7, 2019 4:50 PM

#78

_Ako_

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Great in bed and hates anime... I mean why would you like anime? That's already a sign you'll be a forever virgin lolicon otaku

Jul 7, 2019 4:53 PM

#79

QualityByron

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Mar 2018

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Good looking
Caring
Funny
Best $10 I ever spent

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Jul 7, 2019 9:44 PM

#80

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@Maneki-Mew: Nah, don't worry, I'm more interested in other things than in the explicit details.

But why exactly? Our culture used to glorify loyalty and fidelity much more.
I already have to deal with the pain of losing people even when I don't even manage to take it into love relationship state. It's been almost always the case that the other person has found someone else, gets triggered by what I write or has any other issues that makes them slowly or suddenly completely ditch me.

I agree that people should ideally take good care about themselves and about others, but some people might have a hard time and may end up in a negative spiral because of that.

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Jul 8, 2019 1:56 AM

#81

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Noboru said:
@Maneki-Mew: Nah, don't worry, I'm more interested in other things than in the explicit details.

But why exactly? Our culture used to glorify loyalty and fidelity much more.
I already have to deal with the pain of losing people even when I don't even manage to take it into love relationship state. It's been almost always the case that the other person has found someone else, gets triggered by what I write or has any other issues that makes them slowly or suddenly completely ditch me.

I agree that people should ideally take good care about themselves and about others, but some people might have a hard time and may end up in a negative spiral because of that.

There are some things I overall don't like in our society in general tbh.

For example, we do glorify loyalty, but therefore you aren't "allowed" to break up with someone, because then you cut the life-long bonds in any case.
Then, there is the modern internet and also fictional media culture in sitcoms etc. It became almost a duty to hate your ex after the breakup, at least to show they are the "bad guy" and you are the good one. I mean, of course it might hurt, but if nothing you couldn't forgive happened (Like domestic violence, abuse or so), I think adult people should be able to... get over themselves, to put it like that. That's a huge betrayal to tell someone you love them and after the breakup, they are suddenly the scum of the earth.

Also, to me the society is insanly sex obsessed and at the same time sex is still some kind of taboo and many people have a not a healthy relationship to it.
So people (and the new partner maybe) assume everyone thinks the same way and just stays friends with their ex partner to get sex whenever they want.

It's also about gender stereotypes, I think. These kind of macho guys think that all men function the same way like they do, and some women do believe that too. So, they believe every guy is a sex-obsessed idiot, who doesn't want women as friends anyway, because it's useless, if you can't get sex, and women, who stay friends with them, might be sluts in the eyes of others.

You mean, they dump you after you confessed to them? That's shitty. :/

Jul 8, 2019 5:40 AM

#82

GlennMagusHarvey

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Do I get a -$1 discount for "Hates Memes"?

Because I'd totally take that.

Avatar character is Gabriel from Gabriel DropOut.

Jul 8, 2019 10:46 AM

#83

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@Maneki-Mew:

The "Fictional media" comes typically from the USA (Anglo-Saxon world) or from Japan, so technically, it's not our culture. In our culture, we may still glorify loyalty and get baited with "loyalty bonuses". While it's not the ideal, romanticized notion to leave a romantic partner, it should be more than just "allowed" imho to break up with someone when it just doesn't work out. Though ideally, if there are any issues, you should try to communicate about it first, rather than to act on your own. Also, ideally, this should happen in the early stages of a relationship and not when you are already married and/or even with kids (regardless of own children or adopted).

I've never understood why some people seem to act in extremes when it comes to their relationships. The worst is when people start to become emotionally unavailable (ghosting) and ignore you, or outright tell you that they don't want to continue to talk to you and/or unfriend and/or leave you. I always feel like being treated like a broken or outdated toy, then.

Totally agree with you that it's a huge betrayal to enter a love relationship with someone and then treat them very badly once you're out of the relationship because it just didn't work out or because someone found someone more attractive and they got together.

It's possibly because of the "sex obsession" and "nice guys" (guys who only act nice to get into the pants of the girls) that genuine nice guys have it much harder to form any relationship when they are not really attractive in any form, be it looks, wits or status.
Ironically, young people nowadays seem to have much less sex than earlier generations in their heyday.

Probably, because people think you might get seduced or enticed to do it again with your ex that it gets a negative vibe to have still at least amicable feelings for them. But it always takes two for something (anything else would be illegal), so just because your ex might still long for your body, you don't have to agree to do it again with them, not even out of pity.

As for the stereotypes: even if guys get randomly horny and just with looks alone, it's not like they can't control their urges at all. At least the vast majority. I don't see anything wrong with staying just as friends with the opposite sex. Sure, if I were in a love relationship, I might be jealous if my girlfriend met other guys alone in person and/or would hold intense contact to them, but in the end, there has to be some trust that the girlfriend would be at least a decent human being who wouldn't cheat on me and that she wouldn't get involved with shady characters.

Well, I haven't really confessed in the sense of uttering the three magical words directly with the explicit wish to get into a love relationship, but more like telling them how I've enjoyed being with them that they've become important to me and/or me generally telling them they were cute and/or listing other positive characteristics. Coincidentally, pretty much all relationships went downhill at some point or other after that. Because the other side very likely perceives me as "desperate" and since I only look average at best, I might even be regarded as "creepy" for feeling like that.

And my main feelings are not to become a love couple or to do hot stuff, but just to become and stay genuine and close friends. I would be open for a romantic relationship or a "friendship plus" for as long as I would be single, but not especially seek them out. Sure, the prospect of doing it with someone with whom you have a deep(er) emotional connection sounds way more enticing to me than doing it with a total stranger or mere acquaintance (with or without paying money, respectively). However, "sex" would not be the goal for me, but rather a means to get closer to the heart that would be only available if the respective girl/woman would want me to. I may be interested in it, but my top priority is to form deep bonds that can't be broken that easily just because someone has trouble on their end, found themselves a partner or got enraged by what I told them.

In the end, what should matter more imho is what the involved persons think of their relationship and not how others see it. Because it's quite natural to be interested in members of the opposite sex and have friends from there, since people may simply pay more attention to them and act nicer/kinder/better to them compared to members of their own sex.

NoboruJul 8, 2019 11:15 AM

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Jul 8, 2019 12:22 PM

#84

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564487

@Noboru
But we are consuming US media since like 30+ years. American sitcoms and high school movies etc. were part of many people's childhood experiences and the stereotypes there are very simple and idealized. I mean, I don't even know why, there are some you could watch while doing something else, but most times it's cringe at finest and either the producers only have sex in their mind or they are too damn lazy to write many of these jokes about something else than sex. The only one I also thought was pretty smart and well-written (means kind of relatable) too was Scrubs to me.

Social medias are also full of posts and memes about hating your ex partner or their new partner.
I understand, if you have a very good reason and being jealous is only human too, but these are grown-up people, who can't act civil around someone, who didn't abuse them or anything.

Yes of course, I'd try many things and try to talk and work through it, even if it's hard. But it's better to end it, before you destroy both of you.

And of course it shouldn't happen that they treat you like that. Whether they are your ex or someone, who doesn't want to be with you.
I don't think that it's normal for many people to get into a new relationship, just because someone else is more attractive. Either they are superficial to start with or there are other reasons behind it.

By sex-obsessed I mean that some people act super horny, because society developed in that direction. It's getting confused with being open-minded.
It's about media and harmful stereotypes too and the stuff there that appears like a 14 yo teenager, who is overwhelmed by their hormones, has written it lol

But besides that, if people want to have sex with their ex and don't have a new partner at the time or someone, who is okay with it and allows it, yeah why not. You just have to play by the rules you come up with your new partner, as long as you're also okay with it.
That would be the last thing that comes to my own mind, tho, for the reasons I told above.

And these typical nice guys are this kind of people, who don't know how relationship and love actually work. Unfortunately I met some and they were on a such incredibly surface level of a person that I know the real reason why women feel repulsed by them.

I understand, but maybe don't have such high expectations. I learned that I should try what seems right to me at the moment. Did they give you reasons why they act like that.

The last thing ... why do you believe that, I don't think it's true in any form. If people act like that, then because they learned it to behave like that as boys or girls towards the opposite gender.

Jul 8, 2019 12:53 PM

#85

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Jan 2009

14401

@Maneki-Mew
That may be so, but the fairy tales and values come from our own culture, even when it gets westernized.
Scrubs was great, but it's been so long, I've forgotten pretty much everything.

That's why I prefer to avoid the mainstream social media like Facebook, Twitter and IG, and only seek them out if there's content that interests me.
Actually, even younger people are capable to act mature, so it's even worse when a grown-up acts like that.

Yup, and I also agree with you that the end of a love relationship doesn't have to end the whole contact.

I don't know what you would classify as "super horny", but this might be quite harmful, since it would put pressure on people.

Exactly. And if more than 2 people each want to start a sexual and/or romantic relationship with each other, then they should be able to do so, provided each one gives the okay.

Not only those "nice guys" and "incels" (in the negative sense), but also the genuine type of nice guys and the guys with just no romantic and/or sexual experience. But when someone never enters a love relationship or any other romantic and/or sexual relationship, they will never know themselves "how relationship and love actually work".
In any case, I hope the "nice guys" you've met weren't too obnoxious or even harmful.

I've long lost the expectations that something might end up in a love relationship. I would be already very happy to be "friend-zoned" rather than "leave-zoned" or "ignore-zoned".
Unfortunately, I either didn't get any reasons or at least no reason I could understand. I've been lacking proper and regular feedback as to what makes someone suddenly become much less responsive to me and what makes them suddenly become more responsive.

The irony is strong that I'm having this deep conversation with a member of the opposite sex. So you think it's a learnt behavior that I tend to open myself easier up on an emotional level towards females rather than towards males?

NoboruJul 8, 2019 1:00 PM

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Jul 8, 2019 1:35 PM

#86

Ryuk9428

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Mar 2019

4049

I think I'll take good looking, romantic, and smart. I think romantic would be good as well cause a romantic girl probably would be pretty caring so you kind of get two in one with that. I don't feel like I'd have much to talk about with a girl who isn't smart so it'd get boring fast. And having a cute girlfriend to top that all off would be pretty awesome.

Likes memes would actually be a con for me lol. I know too many people who like memes a lot and it gets kind of annoying.

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Jul 8, 2019 1:40 PM

#87

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Jul 2018

564487

@zvera would just give those 10$ to the servants as a tip, who'd build her one with all the perfect features

Jul 8, 2019 2:08 PM

#88

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Jul 2018

564487

dejwo said:
@zvera would just give those 10$ to the servants as a tip, who'd build her one with all the perfect features

I'd give 10 more if they make sure he's got a high hairline )))

Jul 8, 2019 2:12 PM

#89

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Jul 2018

564487

Zvera said:

dejwo said:
@zvera would just give those 10$ to the servants as a tip, who'd build her one with all the perfect features

I'd give 10 more if they make sure he's got a high hairline )))

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Jul 8, 2019 2:26 PM

#90

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Jul 2018

564487

dejwo said:

Zvera said:

I'd give 10 more if they make sure he's got a high hairline )))

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I'm not sure how to interpret that...

Jul 8, 2019 2:51 PM

#91

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Jul 2018

564487

Zvera said:

dejwo said:

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I'm not sure how to interpret that...

Screaming.
Like damn, ouch.

But then again, it's ok, it's not like we are all perfect. You aren't even black haired yourself!

Jul 8, 2019 2:57 PM

#92

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Jul 2018

564487

dejwo said:

Zvera said:

I'm not sure how to interpret that...

Screaming.
Like damn, ouch.

But then again, it's ok, it's not like we are all perfect. You aren't even black haired yourself!

Ouch, not only you misunderstood me but you also went on the offenssive.
You said "build her one with all the perfect features" and I said that I'd add even more for them to make him have a high hairline ))
Silly pet :3

I can easily paint my hair black btw :3

Jul 8, 2019 2:58 PM

#93

Offline

Jul 2018

564487

Noboru said:
@Maneki-Mew
That may be so, but the fairy tales and values come from our own culture, even when it gets westernized.
Scrubs was great, but it's been so long, I've forgotten pretty much everything.

That's true, tho and yes, it was. :D

Noboru said:
That's why I prefer to avoid the mainstream social media like Facebook, Twitter and IG, and only seek them out if there's content that interests me.
Actually, even younger people are capable to act mature, so it's even worse when a grown-up acts like that.

Yup, and I also agree with you that the end of a love relationship doesn't have to end the whole contact.

I don't know what you would classify as "super horny", but this might be quite harmful, since it would put pressure on people.

Exactly. And if more than 2 people each want to start a sexual and/or romantic relationship with each other, then they should be able to do so, provided each one gives the okay.

Oh... someone, who talks about sex all the time and looks for it all the time and you even can't think about platonic friendship or a normal conversation?

Noboru said:
Not only those "nice guys" and "incels" (in the negative sense), but also the genuine type of nice guys and the guys with just no romantic and/or sexual experience. But when someone never enters a love relationship or any other romantic and/or sexual relationship, they will never know themselves "how relationship and love actually work".
In any case, I hope the "nice guys" you've met weren't too obnoxious or even harmful.

It's not about people, who are just inexperienced. I mean, I was in some ways a very late bloomer too, since I didn't want a relationship or sex haha, although at least I knew very well how to act in social situations.

I'ts more about how these people act and they are pretty weird. Not harmful, but people I surely not want to have around all the time.
If I try to describe them, they are obnoxiously women-hating and think they knew all about you better than you do. They thought of women like something they could manipulate with "kindness" until they get sex from them. Then again, they get angry at one point about this, because most women aren't naive enough for that and these guys also have the charisma of a dead fish. ^^"
Or they just have outdated views, like they jumped out from some piece of classic literature lol.

That one guy was with us and suddenly he got angry at the boyfriend of a girl. He tried to white-knight her from her own boyfriend, who said somethinglike: "Hey, you are annoying right now. I'm not your slave and won't go back to the post office for you, because you forgot something. You have two healthy feet and can do shit on your own."
That guy got angry to him like "Iiii (meee, the white knight lol) as a boyfriend would be much better than that and I would do that for her. Always the ASSHOLES get the beautiful girls!!"

I was in a course with him and made fun of my collegue. He was laughing, I was laughing, he called me a mean, little shit or dunno, maybe bitch and then I heard from the back "You don't treat women like that!!!" I tried to tell that it's okay, but eh no... he was like: "You might being told that, but it's not right!" and he had the opinion I became a lesbian now, because most men are sooo mean. It's just... weird. ^^"

But he was quite normal and so in comparison to the extremely right-winged guy, who was desperately looking for a girlfriend, but all he did was hating women. He wrote to various women "good morning, sweetheart" and got mad, if we didn't want him to call us that, because we barely knew him and he was unlikeable. Not the best plan out there, but okay, do your do stranger lol

I guess some / many act like doormats for every good looking girl and don't tell them their true opinion. That's actually uncomfortable, because you never know what these people are thinking.
That one guy thought it would be a nice thing, but being a doormat isn't actually nice, it's more of a psychological problem.
They actually view guys, who treat women normally, like you would treat them today, as assholes. So I learnt when they whine: "they want the bad boys, assholes, yaddayadda", these men might often be very decent people in reality. :')

Noboru said:
I've long lost the expectations that something might end up in a love relationship. I would be already very happy to be "friend-zoned" rather than "leave-zoned" or "ignore-zoned".
Unfortunately, I either didn't get any reasons or at least no reason I could understand. I've been lacking proper and regular feedback as to what makes someone suddenly become much less responsive to me and what makes them suddenly become more responsive.

That's harsh too. I try to speak to people first, if they don't seem to be totally "lost" or I outright disliked them in two extreme cases, because that's unfair otherwise.
But sometimes the contact online gets lost, even if nobody has done anything wrong. I often experienced this and ofc was part of this, since I rarely replied.
So maybe you are not at fault.
For personal contact, I would ask, if a friend avoids the contact..At least, you could try.

Noboru said:
The irony is strong that I'm having this deep conversation with a member of the opposite sex. So you think it's a learnt behavior that I tend to open myself easier up on an emotional level towards females rather than towards males?

I mean, it could be learnt behavior that people act different around others, because of their sex / gender. Of course, you would act different around people you are attracted to, but it's not everyone.

Maybe? Because guys in general might be quicker to laugh at you, if you open up to them, since men aren't supposed to be emotional, sensitive etc. and enough people still believe this.

removed-userJul 8, 2019 3:12 PM

Jul 8, 2019 3:05 PM

#94

vidoxi

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Feb 2017

546

rich, good looking, funny, and 8 feet tall. perfect.

Jul 8, 2019 3:28 PM

#95

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Jul 2018

564487

Zvera said:

dejwo said:

Screaming.
Like damn, ouch.

But then again, it's ok, it's not like we are all perfect. You aren't even black haired yourself!

Ouch, not only you misunderstood me but you also went on the offenssive.
You said "build her one with all the perfect features" and I said that I'd add even more for them to make him have a high hairline ))
Silly pet :3

I can easily paint my hair black btw :3

You enjoy making people at loss of speech bit too much.

Jul 8, 2019 3:46 PM

#96

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Jul 2018

564487

On topic though, good looking, sporty and smart.

Jul 8, 2019 3:55 PM

#97

fickle_sticks

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Jun 2016

129

Smart, caring, funny, hates anime. I’ll buy a butterfinger with the extra dollar.

Jul 8, 2019 4:17 PM

#98

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Jan 2009

14401

Maneki-Mew said:
Oh... someone, who talks about sex all the time and looks for it all the time and you even can't think about platonic friendship or a normal conversation?

Wait, I'm not sure what impression you've got from the small exchange we had so far, but even having an convo like this delights me already. If anything, it's rather the opposite: the closer and the more attached I get to someone, the more I long just to talk to them. Because then, everything else feels pale in comparison. And with "everything" I mean absolutely everything.

Maneki-Mew said:
If I try to describe them, they are obnoxiously women-hating and think they knew all about you better than you do. They thought of women like something they could manipulate with "kindness" until they get sex from them.

And in the worst case, it leaves a girl/woman very skeptical towards members of the opposite sex. So much that in turn genuine kind guys might get confused for a "nice guy". "hating" is a strong word, but the more negative experiences one has, the less likely one is hopeful and/or eager to even try for getting involved with someone else again.

Okay, that one guy was quite weird for white-knighting you when there wasn't even a situation, but rather just friendly banter.

Maneki-Mew said:
But he was quite normal and so in comparison to the extremely right-winged guy, who was desperately looking for a girlfriend, but all he did was hating women. He wrote to various women "good morning, sweetheart" and got mad, if we didn't want him to call us that, because we barely knew him and he was unlikeable.

That's very creepy. It would have been a different story if he were to focus his attention only on one woman/girl and only after getting to know her for longer, though even then, "sweetheart" is a bit too thick lain on imho

Maneki-Mew said:
I guess some / many act like doormats for every good looking girl and don't tell them their true opinion. That's actually uncomfortable, because you never know what these people are thinking.

Acting as a doormat is just sad. I think you don't have to know about all and every thought of someone, since everyone has the right to have a private mind. But the intentions should be made clear from the beginning. If someone explicitly looks for a dating partner, they should bring it up.

Maneki-Mew said:
That's harsh too. I try to speak to people first, if they don't seem to be totally "lost" or I outright disliked them in two extreme cases, because that's unfair otherwise.
But sometimes the contact online gets lost, even if nobody has done anything wrong. I often experienced this and ofc was part of this, since I rarely replied.
So maybe you are not at fault.
For personal contact, I would ask, if a friend avoids the contact..At least, you could try.

Thank you for the sentiment. As for replies, I understand that people are often too busy and/or unmotivated to reply. I'm used to waiting for weeks and I still get happy to get a message from them.
I will never know whether or not I'm at fault when they don't talk to me about it.
Thanks for the advice.

Maneki-Mew said:
I mean, it could be learnt behavior that people act different around others, because of their sex / gender. Of course, you would act different around people you are attracted to, but it's not everyone.

Well, there should be some integrity that you aren't ignoring others just because they happen to be not the one you want to talk to the most.

Maneki-Mew said:
Maybe? Because guys in general might be quicker to laugh at you, if you open up to them, since men aren't supposed to be emotional, sensitive etc. and enough people still believe this.

As a guy, I personally think this has more to do with how guys simply don't manage to talk about these things unless it would be about "guys' talks" (talking about members of the opposite sex you like), but only, if you're close enough with someone.
btw.: speaking of influence, but it's quite ironic how media and literature has been pretty much depicting any deeper bond between two people as a romantic one. So you may be right that from there we've learnt that guys will console women/girls best and women/girls will sooth the guys in turn best.

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Jul 8, 2019 4:29 PM

#99

momoeirin

Offline

Nov 2018

201

smart, good loking and likes anime
gg

❝見つめないで悲しい方を
目を瞑って口づけしよう
甘く溶けるメロディー❞

◀

▶

❝邪魔しないで
真夜中のパラダイス
息もせずに潜っていく
二人だけのダンス❞

Jul 8, 2019 5:14 PM

#100