I can't take this anymore, i need a little bit of peace

Peaceful_Critic said:
I'll happily help you. What you are going through sounds tough. What do you need? Or I should say, what can I do for you? I can't promise that much.

Yzeelb said:
Since you say you are from Iran I am kinda surprised since last time I read about it it's one of the countries with the most sex change operations. Money and family aside at least the legal framework shouldn't be an unsurmountable problem.
On the other side transitioning to female in Iran will probably put you at a great disadvantage...Equality of men and women isn't that great there...

Peaceful_Critic said:
@necro_dancer

Is it possible for you to live with one of your friends who accept you for who you are? That's pretty much the only thing coming to my mind right now, but you probably already thought of that.


That's a perfectly reasonable concern seeing how well that LGBTQ+ thread turned out.

necro_dancer said:

im thinking about deleting this thread cause someone transphobic will probably show up soon and they are gonna call me pathetic and shit like that

i usually dont let anything annoy me but i actually feel awful and pathetic now so...

Kayleah said:
My advice, get a professional to help you.

No one is more qualified than health professionals for whatever it might be that is going through your head.
Seeking advice from people who are simply not trained for that won't do much.
Although it is great that your two friends accepted you for who you are.

Although let me add, to find any kind of peace and tranquility you first must come to own who you are. Don't be ashamed for being your true self. Be ashamed for not being true to yourself.
Better to "fight" through whatever it is now than spend a whole life regretting it.

Best of luck to you OP:)

necro_dancer said:


i talked to a therapist and the gist of it was: u didn't wear pink or paint your nails before coming here so u are not trans

like wtf, i think he expected someone who is already being feminine to go visit him just to get the 'certificate" or whatever so they can change their name and stuff. i had no idea, my sister told me about going to therapist like 2 days before the appointment

i have had male socialization my whole life, what the hell did they expect from me all, im not trans cause i played football with other boys when i was 10? i dont even like football, i just didn't want to be alone ffs

this is the "professional" help u get in Iran

Auron_ said:


Transphobia isn't allowed so rest assured. Honestly there isn't a simple solution to your problem as things stand, maybe joining online communities for trans people, like discord servers might alleviate your pain by the thought that people of similar experiences exist and you can talk of the best course of action or smth.

Other than that yeah it really blows, I can understand as someone whose sexuality isn't welcome in their country as well, and I'm aiming to move after my B.A is over and further my ed somewhere else via student programs, and hopefully attain citizenship/permanent residency while I'm there. Details are ofc unclear lol

Kayleah said:


Not contesting anything, if possible try a different therapist. not all are the same.
I am aware of how bad it is there related to pretty much anything that's not science really.

I think you will find the help you need.
No matter how full of good intentions anyone in the internet might be it won't be the help you need.
Sadly that's just not possible, keep pushing on. You'll see that things won't be as bad as you think they are. There's a solution for your issues for sure :)

Flevalt said:
If I read that right, then you went from

"no job, I can't do --" (=not within your hands, you literally can not)

to

"i would actually get a job for that" (=you could anytime, but it doesn't pay off)

An interesting transition. As far as I'm concerned you have already transitioned plenty.


Would it help you to know that females in general are highly delusional,
much more (overly) judgemental than men with a big emphasis and strong faith in genetics
and therefore it is natural (although still despicable and fully accountable for their thoughts due to free will) for your sisters to feel only contempt for you, as they believe you are simply a failed man?

Basically on the tier list of men,
despite not even being a candidate for them as partner you are still judged,
and you are colored in green here on the tier list:

-ad infinitum to the heavens-
...
* ultra "alpha male"
* "alpha male"
...
* feels entitled to sex
* no self-respect
* has to beg for sex
* mutilated genitals
* asexual
* wants to be a woman
* wants to be a magical girl
* wants sex with minors
...
-ad infinitum to the abyss-


Or was the redpill too soon?

I could post some qualitative sources that would "help" you on the subject (=please you), but I personally don't believe that would really be considered help rather than fostering.

I would not recommend going down that route just for pragmatical reasons alone (how likely are you to find a partner? And then a fitting one at that?)
If you want to take that path anyway, there is no hurry.
Males don't age that fast. You are still going to look handsome with +40,
no matter what you are dressed as.


I can also reassure you that had you been born a man (again) but without desire to transition to anything, your life would still be suffering and you wouldn't manage to find a partner.

Which is both, true for men without standards and self-respect, and for men who have standards and self-respect. As the problem usually lies with women, not the men.

Ironically, would many more men turn gay or similar, they would likely lead fulfilled lives with a loyal partner. Whereas women would have to remodel their lives, as they now were to be forced to take care of themselves.
Too bad for you, however, that not that many men turn fully gay.
They do like to experiment around a lot though, so while your fortunes for a love life (agape) look dark, your love life (eros) would have perspective.

Peaceful_Critic said:
@Flevalt

The fuck, is wrong with you? Why are you trying to kick a girl while she's down by giving him this doomer shit? This is supposed to be a support thread to make her feel better, not worse.

OP: Sorry, I misgendered you. That was really careless and stupid. @necro_dancer

Flevalt said:


I am showing a man his position within the full picture.
Which is obviously relevant to them, as the choice of their gender is an important enough matter for them to strongly ponder about and get frustrated about.

I think you simply assumed too much into my text while reading.
The text is fully on-topic and about OP.

Peaceful_Critic said:
Thanks for your forgiveness. Though, it was really not okay at all. I'll be more careful in the future.

deg said:
study hard, work hard, then migrate (easier said than done but what else can you do?)

necro_dancer said:


its hard to get back on "track" u know? i spent years perfecting the ways of "not caring", i didn't plan on living after 20

i just a need a little push or motivation, but its not going to magically appear, so i just sit in my room and do nothing

if i had some money i may have felt more motivated (like maybe get a bit greedy after spending some money, its like u will never crave a special food if u have never tasted it before)

Seijatachiiii said:
My wishes and my heart goes out to you. It is horrible and so sad to read your desperate cries for help. Please ignore the delusion of users like Flevalt, people like him are so detached from the real world, spewing red-pill incel nonsense. Ignore him, please and other users who will say the same type of hateful rubbish as him.

Your gender dysphoria sounds so hard and tough to live with, I imagine therapy would be a good option, as gender reassignment doesnt seem to be an option from what youre saying. I understand the struggles of being trans in a country that doesnt have lgbt rights yet. I used to live in Malaysia, a muslim country. The religious police would arrest gay, lesbian, bisexual people, and trans people, especially targeting MTF transmen. I'm bisexual myself, and having to hide my attraction to women has hard especially as I had just started going through puberty at the time. I imagine gender dysphoria would be harder to live with. I don't
live there anymore, I was only staying there for 3 years.

How can I help you? I want to aid you badly... your situation... is hard to deal with. It makes me so sad :(

operationvalkyri said:
No option of telling your parents (assuming you live with them)? You can either wait until you're independent, or get a guardian on board to help you.

necro_dancer said:


thank you for the kind words, yeah its not just hard in Iran, many other countries don't have proper laws as well

i guess its all on me to fix it, im thinking about starting transition here (even if it sucks, there is still laws about it, there might be something i can do)

RealTheAbsurdist said:
Now...I'm a straight male, so I'm not the most qualified person to give advice. But nor are people on this thread; we're not professionals. I understand you are desperate. However, an internet forum such as MAL is the worst place to confess your difficulties; because many...problematic individuals take advantage of those who are down.

You said you went to a therapist, only for it to not turn out well. Well, can you try another therapist?

You can try to get a job. Have you tried that?

You said at some point on this thread, correct me if I'm wrong, but that you tried joining an online community with other LGBT members, but you felt jealous of them? If that's the case, know that you will be able to be like them at some point.

I think, if you ask me, for now you need some kind of outlet; for example, I work on music. Maybe you could write down your feelings in the form of poetry, or rap, or a song, or just...anything, really. Or if writing doesn't work, maybe exercise? Exercise has proven to help with things like depression and whatnot.

I hope everything will work out for you.

Seijatachiiii said:


How harsh are the laws on the lgbt in Iran? If you do try to transition and it is illegal, you could get hurt or worse :( While your needs as a trans person are really important, please dont take too much risk.

deg said:
@necro_dancer

about the motivation stuff cannot you just force it? "may the force be with you" or you got some clinical depression at least that makes you lack that motivation?

Flevalt said:

I don't judge you for not understanding what love means though.
Especially since I do not see One Piece on your anime list.

necro_dancer said:


im not sure, thats why i should dig deeper into this, im not too hopeful about it, but nothing works properly in this country and might manage to use this to my advantage

Seijatachiiii said:


Are there any lgbt charities in Iran that youve tried reaching out to for help?

necro_dancer said:


i dont think there is any charity, u just have to get help from government properly

Seijatachiiii said:


Well, then why dont you try doing that?

RealTheAbsurdist said:


Well, I'm glad you've found an outlet, but it sounds like, part of the reason for your problem, is your lack of motivation. In that case, I'm sorry, but you have to put in some personnel effort. Part time jobs don't require having a specific skill, usually. I mean, a few years ago, my first part time job ever was being a dishwasher at a restaurant. Sure, at first it may be hard, but you get used to it fast.
To my knowledge, doesn't the Iran government pay for the...I don't know what you call it, but...the surgeries to transition into the opposite sex? Have you thought of that? Have you spoken to your parents about all this?

EDIT: Oh okay, I just read your latest post, sorry, I wasn't aware it wasn't that simple, the surgery thing.

RealTheAbsurdist said:


I don't understand: I thought the surgery to transition into the opposite sex was perfectly safe? I also don't understand: what does it mean to "take hormones"? Like, is it a pill? What do they do?

Rinaako said:
Only posting because someone keeps spamming this on 4chan.

Seiya said:
OP, I don't think you really want to do this.

If you take "spiro," your penis won't really work anymore, and you may suffer extreme depression. You do not need to take HRT to be female.

necro_dancer said:


no, i am pretty sure i want to do this, why do u say that?

i dont want to use my penis anyway, i fuckin hate that i have it so i dont care if it won't work anymore (i might get SRS too, im afraid of it now but maybe i can do it later)

>You do not need to take HRT to be female

but i want to look more feminine and feel better in my body, there is nothing wrong with HRT