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Would you get romantically involved with someone going to die in the near future?

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Sep 29, 2015 10:48 AM
#1
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May 2015
663
Hypothetical situation.

So you find the wo/man of your dreams, and s/he is into you as well. There's just one problem, s/he has a lethal illness and the doctors have given her/him only two years left to live. S/he makes it clear to you that s/he wants a relationship, but you will probably be upset knowing that s/he is going to die on you so soon. Do you get involved, or walk away now to save yourself the sadness later?

Discuss.
-Deleted-Sep 29, 2015 12:17 PM
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Sep 29, 2015 11:11 AM
#2

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Apr 2015
804
Wait, are we talking about a 3D person here? I'm not getting romantically involved with any 3D person.
My waifu, do not steal.
Sep 29, 2015 11:13 AM
#3

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Aug 2013
7425
I'm not like Cameron from House MD, so nah.
Sep 29, 2015 11:15 AM
#4
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Jul 2018
564516
@OP What if there's no afterlife?
Sep 29, 2015 11:15 AM
#5

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May 2009
1834
No
Sep 29, 2015 11:18 AM
#6
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Oct 2014
5841
I think so. Sadness is like a cup of tea nowadays.


Sep 29, 2015 11:18 AM
#7
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Aug 2015
987
Someone just finished
Sep 29, 2015 11:21 AM
#8
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May 2015
663
caws said:
Someone just finished

Just started it actually
Sep 29, 2015 11:22 AM
#9

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Feb 2010
123
“Don't you think it's better to be extremely happy for a short while, even if you lose it, than to be just okay for your whole life?”


― Audrey Niffenegger, The Time Traveler's Wife
My heart is nowhere to be found... buried six feet underground
Sep 29, 2015 11:22 AM

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Jan 2014
3880
I've already had enough heartbreak in my life to not want to intentionally go through it all over again.
I love Christine

"If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary; In proportion as he simplifies his life, the laws of the universe will appear less complex, and solitude will not be solitude, nor poverty poverty, nor weakness weakness." - Henry David Thoreau


Sep 29, 2015 11:24 AM

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Apr 2011
2852
It would greatly depend on the person and the illness.... Honestly I think I'd probably just be a friend rather then try to start some serious romantic relationship.
Sep 29, 2015 11:24 AM

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Apr 2015
804
caws said:
Someone just finished


My waifu, do not steal.
Sep 29, 2015 11:26 AM
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Aug 2015
987
Azumaoru said:
caws said:
Someone just finished




Sep 29, 2015 11:27 AM

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Jun 2015
535
Yup. If they've made it clear they want the relationship I'd feel obligated to. They're supposedly perfect for me, I'd want them to enjoy their time as much as possible.
Sep 29, 2015 11:33 AM

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Sep 2014
145
If she were the woman of my dreams, yes.

Getting the news would be tough, I'm sure, and I'll be devastated later on, but I would rather enjoy the time we have now and worry about everything else later. If she was as equally as interested in me, I imagine she would be happy to just have me around during such a tough time and I would do everything I could to make it the best two years of her life.
Sep 29, 2015 11:37 AM
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May 2015
663
Heretic94 said:
@OP What if there's no afterlife?

If you don't believe in the afterlife, then just don't pick that option. It's a risk you can choose to take or not.
Sep 29, 2015 11:37 AM

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Aug 2010
2406
I don't think you can choose who you fall in love with, but you can choose to stay away
Sep 29, 2015 11:38 AM
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Aug 2015
987
I would though
Sep 29, 2015 12:09 PM
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Jul 2018
564516
I would if she still had motivation to do stuff and tried to not be depressive all the time. If she's lazy and sad I don't get anything but depression out of it, but if she's a solid person than it would be beneficial for me too in some ways.
Sep 29, 2015 12:12 PM
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Nov 2011
567
-YunoGasai said:
Metaphorical situation.


You mean hypothetical.

Sep 29, 2015 12:18 PM
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May 2015
663
1unarsage said:
-YunoGasai said:
Metaphorical situation.


You mean hypothetical.

Oh shit, that's embarrassing. My MAL life is over. But yes, that's what I meant, thanks for the correction.
Sep 29, 2015 12:19 PM

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Jul 2014
6991
Probably
Sep 29, 2015 12:49 PM

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Feb 2014
501
Depends how soon, but probably nah fam
"So wave goodbye to the hope we were born with, and say farewell to the chance of surviving this holocaust of love, this age of lost souls, but I'm holding on with both hands and I'm never letting go."
Sep 29, 2015 12:54 PM
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Mar 2013
10447
yea for the life insurance money
Sep 29, 2015 12:57 PM

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Jan 2015
3637
JD2411 said:
yea for the life insurance money
/thread
Sep 29, 2015 1:15 PM

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Feb 2014
3237
I love how ominously well this topic goes with your username and picture.

OT: yeah, why not?
Sep 29, 2015 1:50 PM

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May 2015
16469
I think I'd go for it, yes. Everyone I know will eventually die, but is that a reason to prevent happiness?

Avoiding happiness that comes with pain is just avoiding life.
WEAPONS - My blog, for reviews of music, anime, books, and other things
Sep 29, 2015 3:19 PM
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Jul 2018
564516
I will be with her. Until the end.
Sep 29, 2015 3:21 PM

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Mar 2014
2021
Sadly, I don't think I could.
Sep 29, 2015 4:16 PM

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Oct 2012
3223
It will add to my 'tragic hero' backstory!

~ join the MAL suicide pact! ~ ~ ★☭★ ~ ~ embrace nuclear annihilation! ~
Sep 29, 2015 4:19 PM

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May 2011
3092
I don't really know, probably no, I would not want to get attached to someone going to die.
Sep 29, 2015 4:20 PM

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Jun 2015
1928
No, I wouldn't. I've had enough of sadness in my love life.

I respect your opinion as long as you respect mine.
Sep 29, 2015 4:24 PM

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Jun 2015
9143
this reminds me of that pasta that gets posted in feels threads about that guy who's gf had cancer. Actually there's a bunch of pastas with a similar story. Eh.

OT: yeah probably.
Sep 30, 2015 4:50 AM
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Jul 2018
564516
Vokren said:
Yes and then end myself.

Better to die with some happiness than to live depressed till the rest of your days.
Sep 30, 2015 5:52 AM

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Oct 2013
1454
If I really loved her, yeah.
"There's no shame in falling down... true shame is to not stand up again!"

"Aah? Of course I won't miss!"

"My blood tastes like Iron."

"Run through the tape in life! Never give up! Run through the tape!"
Sep 30, 2015 7:11 AM

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Sep 2013
175
If it's the girl of my dreams then I would probably still get involved with her romantically. Nothing lasts forever anyway but the knowledge of knowing she'll be passing away earlier would surely be upsetting to deal with. However to feel pain after losing a loved one means that there was a time when there something to love, which is something to be glad of.
Sep 30, 2015 7:17 AM

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May 2012
4852
I'd walk away, thats his or her problem
save all the cute girls from ntr manga
Sep 30, 2015 7:22 AM

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Nov 2010
26413
Yeah, would give me that nice bittersweetness and the everlasting appeal of the guy who's already seen his most loved one die in his arms. I would be just like a main movie character in the beginning of the movie before he gets over it. I'm already startin to tear up.
You're making me want to re-watch A Walk to Remember.

Sep 30, 2015 7:23 AM

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Feb 2014
633
nah no way
Sep 30, 2015 9:46 AM
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May 2015
1016
Probably not, not if they don't have that long left. You're going to add another layer of emotional heartbreak to an already difficult situation, both for yourself and the person who is dying.

If they had several years left then that might be a different story, things can change over a period of years.
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Sep 30, 2015 9:57 AM
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Apr 2015
1849
lmao i remember my cousin saying she should become the girlfriend of someone who just courted her because he can't walk and felt sorry for him.
Sep 30, 2015 10:01 AM

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Jul 2015
964
Yes, I wouldn't even have to make an effort to break up once I inevitably got bored of them.

Sounds like a perfect relationship.
Sep 30, 2015 10:05 AM

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Mar 2008
47325
Actually if I really loved them? Yes :'(

Now excuse me while I put this thread on hide so I dont have to be really sad thinking about such a scenario.
Sep 30, 2015 10:47 AM
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Sep 2015
195
sure why not
make everyone happy
Sep 30, 2015 2:52 PM

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May 2015
16469
What's better?

It will end after 2 years because she dies, or because she dumps you?
WEAPONS - My blog, for reviews of music, anime, books, and other things
Sep 30, 2015 7:33 PM
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Jul 2018
564516
Fizix said:
You're going to add another layer of emotional heartbreak to [...] the person who is dying.

I was actually thinking of it in quite a different way in that the dying person would suffer more from being in a situation where a relationship is a turnoff due to a short lifespan. I wouldn't think at all that the person dying would suffer more overall if he/she wanted to be in a relationship and the other accepted. It's more taking a hit on the other's side, that being the healthy person.

And btw, the hypothetical was that there was around 2 years left.
Sep 30, 2015 7:34 PM

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Jul 2012
48250
2 years is a good amount of time. I'd do it.
Sep 30, 2015 7:37 PM

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May 2012
4852
mayukachan said:
2 years is a good amount of time. I'd do it.
but are you a ride or die thooough???
save all the cute girls from ntr manga
Sep 30, 2015 10:25 PM
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Jan 2014
695
That's putting the cart before the horse.

The relevant question has to be asked first. Could you become involved with anyone, regardless of lifespan?

Old Chines proverb; "The oxen is slow, the mountains are patient"

Means, in some environments, all Human Life is too short. Don't waste it. If not you, then who? If not now, when?
Sep 30, 2015 10:28 PM
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May 2015
663
KD7BWB said:
The relevant question has to be asked first. Could you become involved with anyone, regardless of lifespan?

But assuming that you couldn't, you'd still be pretty upset having spent two years with someone perfect for you, only to know that that you will not see them again for a very long time. Or never, depending on your religious beliefs.
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