| Thought it would be nice for people to talk about how they're feeling if you'd like. Add anything that you feel is relevant, including age, location etcetera, if you'd like. ____________________________ I'm 20 Years old. I've been alone for a long time, felt alone my entire life. I'm most likely a lot less intelligent then I'd like to believe. I think depression and suicide is a natural result of living, and thinking. I don't see the point in striving for happy moments, why bother when you'll just feel sad again after that. I want to die, mostly for generic reasons that you can imagine, life not worth living etcetera, but not strong enough to kill myself yet. I'm not a good person, and selfish, it is the reason I've lost anyone who has cared about me. Anything that has happened in my life I take responsibility for, it is my fault is has occurred, and was due to my choices. I spout platitudes about self love, self care, self discipline, but apart from outwardly appearing so I lack all of them. I am bitter, and angry that I am who I am. |
 |
| i got this theory that society today needs a lot of brain power and those who have low energy in their brains are prone to mental illness since low brain power results in being more emotional/irrational and less logical/rational thinking, dual process theory is linked to this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dual_process_theory#Systems as you can see system 2 or rational thinking requires more effort and that means more brain power/energy is needed so sleep well to recharge that needed brain power/energy and eat a healthy diet can help not make your mental health worse at least i thought of this the other week when i read about my illness schizophrenia is link with insulin resistance in the brain im telling myself every time i hear fake voices that i just got low brain power again and all what i hear from the fake voices are simply fake news (delusions) it works sometime but not all the time EDIT: as for the link with suicidal thoughts, its like when you are so tired (lacking brain power/energy too) you want an easy way out or solution and suicide is the easiest solution of them all to end all problems EDIT: this is just a basic idea, we know that mental illnesses are more complex than this and i rather talk about this things rather than the irrational thoughts i got since really you cannot break free from that vicious cycle so easily, heck psychoanalysis is kinda considered a pseudoscience |
degMay 29, 2019 1:34 AM
| Not much I'd want to say openly in the forums beyond I'm not happy at all with my life yet I'm almost used to it. I hopefully don't have to suffer much longer. It's all so tedious and unfulfilling for me. It's amusing this topic was posted at this timing because the thoughts I was having before even seeing it. |
traedMay 29, 2019 2:59 AM
| Aw buddy. I understand. I often feel much the same way. Depression has been a long, uphill battle for me and suicide feels like a constant thought at the back of my mind. It's hard to escape that little voice within you spouting off your worst fears, never letting you rest, even when, logically, you'd like to believe there's no truth in what it says. I've been slowly getting better, but it's been hard and not without its relapses. Being in a healthy environment has been beneficial. I think trauma can have a huge impact on how we view the world and ourselves, but of course it often runs deeper than that. I knew someone who had, on the outside, what seemed like a good upbringing. But he struggled with the same things. He was so insightful, maybe to a fault. It's such a difficult situation, because I don't think it's fair to fault people who've committed suicide. Mental illness can be so painful. Calling it selfish just doesn't seem right. At the same time, I like to hold onto the belief that there's always that one thread of beauty in the world we can grip onto and not let go of. There's always a reason to keep going. And if there isn't one for you now, there will be. I really do understand. And I'm so sorry. I know how painful it is. I still battle that suicidal ideation. But we're so young, OP! There's a future out there for you. I don't know you from a bar of soap, but I can guarantee you that. There's a future out there for everyone. I really encourage you to reach out. The mental health system can be crappy, but there's good people in it who do want to help. I've found a free counseling service in my area that has finally given me a good experience in counseling. Sometimes just talking about it can bring so much relief. If you want a friend, I'm more than happy to oblige. I love making new friends! Regardless, depression isn't as simple as people make it out to be and there really is no cut-and-dry solution. I'm sending my love to everyone else who has to fight this. |
   |
| making this post to remind drunken future self to not reply to this thread, don't mind me. |
 |
| Annoys me how common these types of things are, makes me feel even worse about myself if I'm being honest. |
| I feel you. Finding a place to belong at 26 can be a struggle at times. I have considered suicide a few times before and have also almost given up. I wouldn't say I am lonely, but am certainly not all that perfect of a human being. I am pretty open about my struggles on here nowadays and am not embarassed at all. If you ever need someone, I am here. |
 |
| I just can't enjoy anything anymore everything's so fucking boring. No passion or hobbies or goals to work towards nothing. I just exist. And I'm such a lazy fuck I don't even have the energy to pick anything new up. Not that it would matter since I'd give up after 1 second anyways. But at the same time I'm terrified of death so can't even kms ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. |
 |
| For the last eleven years since my mother passed away from cancer, I've been coping with feelings of profound sadness and hopelessness. I don't know if it's depression or not, since I've never talked to anyone about it, much less to a doctor or anything like that. I've never contemplated suicide either, but I just feel like as if everything always feels heavy, like I don't have a passion for anything. I never know if I'm doing something because I want it or because I know how to do it, because it's comfortable, if you catch my meaning. I've had a couple of relationships, the most recent one ended at the beginning of the year. Even so, I always feel like I'm a burden for the girls who go out with me, since I'm always so indifferent to everything around me. I try not to resent my father for remarrying after my mother's death, but deep down, I know I do and my sisters do as well. My stepmother is always nice to me, but I can't bring myself to like her. That's why I chose an uni away from home, I couldn't stand like everyone in my family moved on from my mom and I'm the only one still affected by it. Maybe I'm just too weak? Idk. I probably should've moved on by now, if I'm being honest, but I just can't. |
 |
| Go volunteere at some local healthcare office or old age home or any non profit organisation for services or clean your nearest park or something for free. I tutor maths to middle school kids at a local ngo and get fruits as payment and i fucking love it. |
foscor70May 29, 2019 11:55 AM
| Not gonna drop much personally to why I have the urges to commit neck rope fam but all I can say is that it is sad that I actually am the Doomer meme lmao. |
  Ascended Taste I only came back to this site for the forum sets and to promote my RYM list... Anilist ftw still :dab: |
| Geez, we need a resident therapist, life-coach and psychoanalyst here ._. I'm unlicensed, but here for you. Don't let society build a prison of expectations around you, and don't let yourself build a prison in you--those are nearly unbreakable sometimes. This thread is filled with very different things though, so not everyone here is only depressed. There seems to be feelings of guilt, shame and anomie (also possible faux feelings disguised as something else). Forums really are interesting. |
| "In the end the World really doesn't need a Superman. Just a Brave one" |
| people here maybe are young too and when you are young you still got those raging hormones due to the body developing to adulthood although if brain/body development goes wrong then youre stuck with mental illness |
More topics from this board
» It is too damn hot right now...I wonder why?DesuMaiden - 2 hours ago |
4 |
by Nette
»»
30 minutes ago |
|
» it's the weekend and my brains are really fried right nowtsukareru - 8 hours ago |
25 |
by Nette
»»
32 minutes ago |
|
» How much IQ points do you lose when you interact with people in real life?LenRea - May 20 |
29 |
by WaffleMaster89
»»
48 minutes ago |
|
» Is there a cure for mental illness?DesuMaiden - May 23 |
18 |
by WaffleMaster89
»»
1 hour ago |
|
» Do You Trust Anyone?LenRea - Yesterday |
29 |
by Jamk_
»»
2 hours ago |