Did you ever date a very negative or insecure person?

Honey_Flash said:
I’m a lot like that. My last relationship (which was also my first relationship) ended due to similar issues. I’ve never had the greatest social skills and I have some issues from my past that kind of make it hard for me to trust and open up to people. When I met my ex boyfriend, he and I really hit it off. I was myself around him, and he liked me enough to ask me out, but once we started dating, everything kind of changed. I was no longer really myself around him. It was like there was this new kind of “pressure” added to the relationship because we were a couple. Once we got together, I really didn’t know how to act and I just kind of became afraid to speak up. I was also horribly insecure. For years, I really thought nobody could ever like me, so I felt like I had to do everything in my power to keep what I had, which is never how you want to have a relationship. I really just needed more confidence, and I’ve been told since the relationship has passed that one really needs to love themselves before they can love another person, and I think that rings true. Not that he didn’t make mistakes, because he made plenty, but I absolutely think that my insecurity, lack of confidence, and unwillingness to trust and open up to others had a severely negative impact on our relationship. This experience has also kind of made me more scared to open up to others, but I can’t let it do that to me. I really need to take it as an experience that I should learn to improve from.

Nvanz13 said:
Unfortunately, I did this a few times. I always went in with that silly notion that I could help them, and make their lives better, and "fix" them (hate using that term, because it's not like they are a broken object you can glue back together or something). I'm thankful that while we were together it seemed like I made a positive impact on their lives, but eventually I had to end the relationships because it gets extremely draining, and you can't change someone else unless they are willing and work for it themselves. Jeez, I was a pretty naive fellow, pretty idealistic too. Sadly, while I remain friends with them, they all ended up rebounding to negative influences almost immediately and their quality of life isn't the greatest. I do wish I could help them, but I've definitely learned my lesson.