Kizumonogatari I: Tekketsu-hen

It's getting increasingly hard to care about Shaft as an animation studio. Ever since Madoka Magica, they've done nothing but play it safe, churning out sequels to their popular stuff again and again until they became the anime studio version of Nintendo, whilst all their new IP have been so mediocre that with the exception of Nisekoi, nobody remembers them anymore. Not helping is the fact that after so many years, they STILL haven't ditched that outdated Shinbou-animation style that quite frankly looks about as exciting to watch as the same tech demo done on Unreal Engine. Sure it's pretty to look at, but it ... gets old when you see the same exact thing fifty fucking times. And in Monogatari's case, you're just seeing the exact same story told to the audience, only with slight variations in details and inconsistent levels of of quality animation.

Let's be honest, anybody who says they still like Shaft at this point in time really means they just like Monogatari. And the studio knows it because at this point, they've churned out more sequels to that thing than they have new anime. Except in Kizumonogatari's case, it's actually a prequel. Or to be more precise, "the" prequel, because this thing has been delayed so long that people were afraid it was going to become the anime equivalent to The Thief and the Cobbler. Can't imagine why people wanted it to be adapted so badly, considering it's just the story of how Hanekawa and Shinobu first met Arararagi and I don't know why you'd need to see that. Or why it needed to be a movie to begin with. And what exactly is so important about getting the quality right that you needed it to be split into three parts? Does Shaft think Kizumonogatari is their 5 Centimeters Per Second or something?

I paid money to go see Kizumonogatari in theatres because I was almost certain I would hate it, and I needed more reasons to ignore the -gatari fans I hang out with when they keep trying to reassure me that "this segment is the best one yet" like a Jojo fan going through rehab (which incidentally, they are too, minus the rehab part). Every single Monogatari thing that I've personally seen has been nothing but every inexplicably popular light novel adaptation ever. Always full of unfunny conversations that do nothing but build character for the sake of building character, or move plot points along without attaching any sort of story to it whilst having all the female characters get their panties in a bunch for that one lone male who ends up saving them from a terrible fate as a bonus. So with all the hype built towards this film, I was kinda looking forward to see if it was worth the long wait, and whether it would actually differ from the other adaptations or if it was just the fans praising shit that has less differences from the previous iterations than a Ubisoft sequel.

Well it turns out that the reason for the long wait is so they could properly animate Arararagi getting set on the best-looking fire you'll ever see. No, I'm not kidding. Get close to the screen and when the scene occurs, you'll actually be in danger of getting your eyebrows burnt to a crisp. Hope you consider the flames worth the price of admission, because everything else about this movie is so bad - so fucking NOT worth the fifteen bucks - that I was glad Boy and the Beast was also airing on the same day, because I needed to watch another movie after that and it helped that it was only $7.50 for a ticket. HALF of what I spent on Kizu in order to watch a movie that's TWICE AS LONG. That is bullshit!

I actually kind of wished I waited until it got subbed online, because then I could mute the video player, turn off the subtitles, and just watch some pretty visuals for an hour. Sure they're not exactly on the level of the works produced by my favorite anime directors, and I can't work around the stupid "title card segues" and the cheesecake shots - but if I can sit through an animated Adam Sandler film with those conditions, I can live with that. Because whilst the incredibly large audience at my theatre were having a big laugh at stuff I didn't get the joke of several times throughout the movie, I initially sat down pondering how they were going to impress the fans, and by the end I was slumped all over my seat wondering how much longer I had to sit through this pig shit. At least up until the ending credits, where I literally woke up from my seat and started shouting obscenities for reasons I'll get into later, before leaving the theater whilst everyone around me spoke about how much they enjoyed themselves.

So we all know the basic outline of the thing, but what exactly happens in the first part of Kizumonogatari you may ask? Well it's pretty much a poor man's combination of Mind Game and the vampire arc from the latest season of Adventure Time, two much better cartoons. Arararagi meets Hanekawa one day and the two have that usual Nisio Isin inexplicably long conversation before the dude walks off into a random subway in order to meet a busty vampire. He lets the vampire drink his blood after another long conversation and gets turned into one himself. Then he finds himself hunted by three other vampires who mostly like to jump around alot rather than throw a punch or a bite and meets Oshino through them. That's literally all that happens in this film: meeting and talking, meeting and talking, an explanation for Agakawi's (yes I'm misspelling this on purpose) vampire powers and how they work, and then more meeting and talking while I try to figure out where the fucking story is.

It doesn't even have the same level of standalone-ness with each installment as previous anime-told-through-movies like Break Blade or Kara no Kyoukai has. After Hanekawa's introduction, she never shows up again for the rest of the film. And the three vampires that are hunting Arararagi? They don't even have a line, let alone are given any names or personality whatsoever, thus causing them to have zero chemistry with the dude. Why? Because we had to devote the necessary screen time to making it clear that our lead character is a pervert who likes his busty ladies. This is script-work I'd expect to see from the writers of Mortal Kombat Annihilation. With screwdrivers lodged into their eyeballs so they can't even see what they're typing!

They even use those outdated shitty sound effects whenever a "comical" scene that adds nothing to the movie happens because we needed some way to get the audience to know you're supposed to laugh at Hanekawa's bouncing overly large boobs shy of a laugh track. And just to hammer the "nail of suck" in, after sitting through all that meet and greet, the film ends on a cliffhanger. A cliffhanger that literally made me do all the obscenity shouting I mentioned earlier because it just happens out of nowhere, right when Oshino puts an end to his conversation with Arararagi! I don't care if there are two more movies coming out later. You wouldn't say that about Shyamalan's The Last Airbender film - not that sequels will ever be made - and even with the 3D glasses, it wasn't as expensive as the ticket price attached to this crap!

Intriguing cliffhangers along with a slick (outdated) style and sharp dialogue that isn't nearly as funny as it thinks it is are the only reason Monogatari (and Durarara for that matter given there's still people saying it's good with a straight face despite Japan all but giving up on it entirely) still gets a free ride, despite the fact that the core of the show has absolutely no thrust or tension to its themes whatsoever. Last I checked, story-focused shows require that shit to be intriguing. But then again, anime fans have proven for more than a decade that they'll forgive lack of forward momentum as long as what lies on the horizon looks intriguing, and given that poll I did a while ago, that doesn't look to be changing anytime soon. Seriously guys, "Bad Story #2" is in last place?

I just hope you fans realize that Shaft can't rely on Monogatari to keep them afloat forever. Eventually they're going to finish the thing, and what's going to happen then? Personally, I'm all in favor of them getting help. The same kind that Manglobe got, preferably.

Ok, I'm not sure what movie the majority of reviewers online watched, but Kizmonogatari (Part 1) was AWFUL. Basically it was boobs bouncing, Araragi sweating/screaming/running, and a bunch of 3D backgrounds that didn't look right with the 2D animated characters. It honestly feels like the creators said "Ok, time to stretch 20 minutes of plot into 60 minutes. Let's make Araragi gasp and scream and flail for a 20 minute scene." They wasted so much time under the guise of suspense that when the "thing" actually happened, I was bored, not intrigued or excited. By the time the movie actually got interesting, it was over. ... Not to mention the inconsistent animation. The movement of the characters towards the beginning is really terrible (Hanekawa looks like she's hobbling across the street instead of walking), compared with a part towards the end I won't spoil that looked awesome and clearly had a different animator in charge.

I actually LIKE the Monogatari Series for the most part. It has its faults, but overall is a fun series that's different enough I keep coming back for the new seasons despite its flaws. So I'm coming from an honest place where I want to give it the benefit of the doubt and can't. Tekketsu-hen was unbelievably appalling as a movie and I personally think it shows how little they think of their fans. Do they think we'll like and rave about anything labeled "Monogatari?" Judging by the other reviews I'm reading online, that seems to be the case and it's really hard to comprehend. Whoever wrote the script left out 90% of the charm the show does have. The show wastes tons of time, but fills it with witty dialogue. Almost none in Tekketsu-hen. There were a couple laugh out loud moments, but that's it. I WANTED to see this movie, bought my tickets weeks in advance, and have really nothing good to say about it which is a huge disappointment.

So before I start this my overall view of the show is that a fan of the monogatari series should see it but not pay any money for it because it is bad, really bad. As someone else said there actually 15-20 minutes of actual content stretched over one hour. The main impression the movie made on me was that of young art school student who tries to impress too much. So without delay these are my points against this movie:

1. the drawings are extremely different from the rest of the animes related to Monogatari. And different in a bad way. While in the rest ... the difference in style between the building and characters is visible in this one is annoying. Also there are plenty of effects thata have no purpose and lots of bad CGI.
2. characters behave odd. I understand it should be a prequel but still it does not seem they are the same person.
3. The word screens in the original series meant something. They expressed Araragi's thoughts and had an impact. In this movie they pop up every 5 minutes and they are annoying: "Black" "Red" "Silence" ... really now?
4. too much time wasted wit Araragi falling an burning
5. Too many replays of Hanekawa's boobs and panties. I mean even the fanservice is bad.
6. Araragi seemingly masturbating and Araragi leaving an apartment flat in the middle of nowhere. Two weird scenes, the second being weird because he lives in a house in the middle of a house neighborhood
7. Kiss-Shot does not look like herself
8.there are severe differences between the previous animes with monogatari +Manga and this one regarding how Araragi and Kiss-shot met.

After putting it off for so long and reading (and listening to) the Light Novel a few months ago, I am utterly disappointed and shocked by this first part of Kizumonogatari.

The amount of inconsistencies not just with the light novel original but also depictions and styles from the rest of the animated series is staggering. CG and hyperrealistic backdrops everywhere, and evencharacters are CG-animated in places.

Environments were changed for the heck of it, with no real point to them. Instead of having a localized lack of electricity around Kiss-shot on the street, we get almost a full-blown outage, just that she's lying in the subway ... with all the lights around her working just fine. Nevermind the kilometer-long blood trail leading to her. Or how Araragi is cornered by the Vampire Hunters in a highly industrialized area instead of a suburb. Or how he doesn't just step out of the cram school and burns, but has to take a minutes-long walk looking at crows before lighting up, then falling off the building, then crashing around the place some more.

This entire thing is overchoreographed to the point of silliness. Not the good silliness of the rest of the series, but just one that feels needlessly padded.

The worst part however is the almost complete lack of Araragi's inner monologues. Instead we see him walking silently. Walking. Running. Screaming. Where the novel and the other animated adaptations build him up as an interesting character through his monologues, this one has barely any of that. As a result the voice acting is so sparse, they could have squeezed all of it easily into a single episode of Bakemonogatari. For a movie about three times as long, that is ludicrous.

There are some good scenes towards the end, with a bunch of dialogue, but that just reinforces how empty the first 30-45 minutes feel. It had me bored, not engaged like the rest, or indeed the novel. If this is the product of years and years of work and movie-like budgets, I am honestly wondering where the money went.
A three parter of 1-hour movies definitely doesn't seem necessary, or even plausible, when about half of what was shown here could have been condensed (or, rather, not blown up the way it was). This screems of padding and milking a popular license, nothing else.

Here's hoping parts 2 and 3 will be better. I have my doubts, though. I can only recommend reading the novel, officially released in English by now, or getting the audiobook (also in English) if you'd like a more familiar experience. The movie, at least as far as this first part is concerned, is dreadful.

Kizumonogatari was probably the most original and entertaining story about vampires that I read in my life. I did not read much of them. But most were similar. And now finally we have a screen version of the novel.

What do we have here?
Characters designs ruined, ugly rotoscoping animation, irrelevant backgrounds work, monstrously prolonged scenes, they threw out half of the dialogues, but added lo-o-ong and absolutely pointless scenes and details that were not in the novel.

Apparently, this is an exhausted, long-running project, many times changed the director, and released from the consideration "just to finish it."
Or an eloquent demonstration of bad taste, lack of talent ... and helplessness of modern Japanese animation.

2/10 Worthless waste of an excellent book.

Having watched the Monogatari series in release order during the last few months, I was looking forward to this very much. Finally getting to see, how araragi and shinobu met in the frist place. The Monogatari series is now (still, despite of this monstrosity) one of my favourite Anime series, with all the arcs up until here ranging somewhere between 6/10 (nadeko snake) to 10/10 (tsubasa tiger, hitagi end, suruga monkey,...).

That said, it is hard to believe, how terrible this movie is. The visuals are mostly okay, but everything else went wrong:

Characters:
This is my biggest issue. Araragi in this movie is not araragi. The same ... completely over the top panic-expressions combined with baby-like voiceacting turn him into a pathetic little wimp, so much so that it is painful to watch. Shinobu goes from threatening to crying like a baby within a few seconds, in a way that does not make any sence at all. Her personality after changing into child-form is also abnoxious and nothing like she turns out to be in the actual series. The only character they actually got right is hanekawa.

Soundtrack:
It is god-awful. Most of it is the bare minimum of what is cosidered dramatic orchestra music, composed without any inspiration and mixed in too suddenly and too loud. It is completely different from the minimalist but sufficient approach that the rest of the series takes. It is distracting and annoying.

Storytelling/Directing:
For some reason, this prequel is not treated as a prequels at all. It spends so much time setting up "suprising" moments, that we ALREADY KNOW are going to happen. We know, that araragi is going to find shinobu at the end of that blood trail. No need for 3 minutes of him dramatically following it. We also already know, that he is going to save her. No need for him to go through mindless over the top panic to a brief moment of actually being araragi to depressed selfhatred within a few minutes before actually saving her. And we also already know, that he is not going to die. All of these things were never going to have any tension about them, but that is the only thing the movie is trying to achieve, instead of focusing on character develpoment.

All in all, this is nothing but a painful experience of wasted potential for what copuld have been a great story.

TLDR, Overall Rating: +4/10
*No spoilers in this Review*

Before I start this review, I would like to preface that, besides this movie, I have only watched Bakemonogatari from the Monogatari series (which I gave an 8/10).
Now, where to start... ah yes the "plot." The actual plot behind the first movie in Kizumonogatari is terrible. Besides the fact that half the screen time is allotted to araragi walking and screaming, there is really nothing there. Sure we get some cool interaction between him and Shinobu towards the end but that's really it. Now, let me give a list of pros and cons
Pros:
1.) OST is ... good.

Cons:
1.) Plot pacing is terrible. This movie could have been condensed into a twenty minute episode easily.

2.) LITTLE TO NO DIALOUGE! I mean c'mon, there isn't a single word uttered in the first 10 minutes or so. For me, this is a huge strike since the dialogue in bakemonogatari is what made me like the show.

3.) SHITTY FAN service! Oh my god. In bakemonogatari, the fan service was comical, it lifted the atmosphere and gave us a good laugh. Here, however, the fan service is awful to watch. It even made me hate hanekawa as a character.

3.) The characters. Both araragi and Hanekawa are terribly written characters with superficial depth. People that claim Hanekawa to be good are just in it for the fan service, don't be fooled!

4.) No slideshow charm from the show. One of the things I thoroughly enjoyed in the show was the slideshow for it represented a unique format by which we as an audience can gather information as well as dive into our main characters thoughts. Here, however, it is absent.

5.) Lot's of CGI and the world looks even more bland than before.

Honestly, a 4/10 is a generous score for this disappointing waste of an hour. I started the second part (movie 2) in hopes of it being better and so far I've had to quit twice. Don't recommend.
hope you find this helpful

Monogatari series were a great example of how to properly adapt a wall of text into degenerative cartoons. While still being "tell, don't show" — like a text — it made up for it with awesome background, awesome music and just the right amount of artsy shit like the slideshow, the camera angles, the architecture of protag's bathroom.

Kizumonogatari grabs this well-working formula and throws it out of the window. The music is loud and distracting, all the character reactions and actions are theatrical and unnatural, everything's very dragged out, very pretentious and very confusing since the inner monologue is cut completely and only the bare ... minimum of dialogues is left. And it doesn't work that way.

First 90 seconds of ep.1 of Bakemonogatari are a better anime adaptation of Kizumonogatari, than these films, both in style and in general comprehension of the events.

THIS REVIEW IS SPOILER-FREE

Story :

The first movie, much like the rest of the trilogy is set on Japan, centered around a high-school student, providing a backstory to the ever-so-popular Gatari series main character Araragi.

The opening of the movie is a flashforward scene, raising questions for the viewers about what is going on. This is made to pique interest very early on and generally helps to follow a very good pace throughout the storytelling.

This is definitely an area that could be done better in this movie. Between the flashforward and the rest of the story - I felt there was a missing scene, disconnection these ... two and providing no sense to what happened in the opening. This is quite disappointing for a movie, seeing as being the first one it definitely should've taken care of viewers not feeling connected to the story after finishing it.

Besides that, the story itself is nothing complex, definitely not original to what it's trying to say. It's been done before, exhausted even. It was predictable in some scenes, however this doesn't make the set-up for the trilogy less interesting. The cliffhanger at the end took care of that. It was satisfying in a sense that things finally seemed to be getting interesting, and disappointing because that came too late in the movie.


Art :

The artstyle feels like the CryEngine of gaming. It's very good, definitely close to a realistic view, as animated movies should be. It is something that this studio has done a few times in the past as well from what we've seen.

That said, sometimes it doesn't fit in quite well with the rest of the scenes, especially in the comical ones, or the expressions of the main character. I felt that broke the immersion and could definitely been done better.


Sound :

I watched the movie subbed in English, not being very familiar with the voice actors, as I'm quite new to anime, I cannot recognize any of them. However I felt that generally the voice acting was very good.

With that said, it wasn't anything memorable, and didn't provide any atmosphere to keep the viewers in. In a way, I think the quiet was deliberate on the producer's part.


Character :

I felt this was the lowest point. The world of Gatari is vastly underwhelming when it comes to the number of characters that we see in the movie. It does help and give a sense of scale to see people running or walking about while the important characters have a conversation. There are *very* few characters throughout the movie to a point that the world feels desolate. Even the cars driving in the background could be automated since it doesn't appear that there's a person in the driving wheel for all we can see.

The main character makes a questionable and arguably terrible decision with the first and only problem he's presented in the movie. He faces a problem, is stuck with this problem and despite being a loner, one should always try to seek outside help or at the very least, as we've seen in anime for years, contemplation of the issue is mandatory to find the next course of action.

None of the other characters are memorable, and one of them is certainly used as a plot device twice in the story, the audience still confused as to who he might be and why should he be involved in this.


Enjoyment and final thoughts :

I felt this was just a decent animated movie and perhaps just enough to be called average seeing as it's the first one in a trilogy. Perhaps all the questions and questionable decisions will make sense in the second or final movie?

4/10

// !!!Warning!!!
//Review contains poor language, language that everybody here can easily //understand.
//Author may be drunk, half-there or even suffer from dehumanisation. So //you don't have to take it seriously.
//I do not refer to a source material. But there is no spoiler. ;)


Title: ”Money, it's a Shaft.”


Monogatari is a word which means story. But every story must be about something. The easiest way to characterize plot is just give a title. It’s one of the main factor which describes every story in this universe.
...
The first anime adaptation, made by studio Shaft, was called Bakemonogatari (Ghost and Story – Ghostory). Its aim was rather obvious – telling story about ghosts – describe characters by telling story about their ghosts. It’s so easy to understand, isn’t it? Of course because it’s the most safety ground to tell a story about something else. Often this concept touches characters or relationship between them. If we talk about anime which wants to show one aspect (which is in this case a main one), we have to make a compromise. This compromise is a main plot. But what to do to hide it? Just a think about composition – strategy.


And here goes the Shaft’s stroke of genius– Blitzkrieg.


Studio perfectly seen what are their strengths and weaknesses. They knew that presentation the story form very beginning, which Is quite complex, won’t make such a big impression and won’t encourage viewers to see the whole series. There is the reason of Bakemonogatari as the first chapter – characters are the main ground every series. Maybe not characters as they themselves but the formula of their presentation. Viewers remembers only some the most basic things of the show. One of them is type of narrative – characters only talks about anything which strangely perfect fits to situation which is about something what is not important. So something like life, or something. It makes a specific slow pacing, the place is frugal and a bit abstract but perfectly combines with long dialogs, because it’s give a natural to this place. It’s very complex but it’s don’t require detailed interpretation. So that is that strength of the series, which makes its different to others.


But what’s the weakness? The rest – plot.


It’s not hard to figure out that thing. But what to do to turn into the advantage? The solution was adding some pieces of information into the dialogues but in a amount that viewers won’t pay attention to them. In addition there was no point – separate parts of story were more interesting that the reason why they are. There was just a little problem – the chorological beginning which was only based on the main plot.
Here Comes Your Man – Shinobu.

Secret weapon and guarantee of success – If we can’t change it, we can make fans to love it. If the main character of this part is Shinobu, let’s give them impression that she is a very important person, give a lot information round her but not about her (I look at you Snail’s chapter in Second Season). And Suddenly this character has became as much popular as Senjougahara who had well developed personality, whose development took some parts of the series. But who cares, there is Assassin Shinobu.


The Main dish – hate born under punches.


This long introduction was to show the main problem this movie which had came into being long before the first sheets of script have been written. It’s heavily depends on its genesis. I causes the fact that it can’t be taken as a separate anime movie, because basically a long trailer – movie which gives you some parts of information about their localization. But in this case in really poor way.

So let’s talk about local plot because it’s Monogatari series. Plot focuses more on Koyomi than Shinobu (the poster lies), what is completely clear because he is the main protagonist of most series. There comes a question – “How to develop any character in any part of this series”. Most people would say that by talking. And they are right. But there is a problem – you are the only person in the anime, so talking to yourself is kind of sick. So what the authors decided to do? Only logical solution, development by the actions. But the amount of them is a bit low – about 3 or 4 scene for 1 hour movie. It is rather ridicules, if we know that it’s one on the main topic. By the way if you have even seen at least one movie about vampire, you know these scenes already now.

By what about Shinobu? And that’s a good question – “What about her?”. She is technically the most important person (like always) but nothing about has been said. To better understand it, you must realize that this part of story is similar to business conversation and making deals. The personality is not important as the product which you want to buy or sell. Every single talk is driven by plot, not character development . And there is nothing wrong with it so far as we don’t talk about characters whose personality are main topics of the movie.

Here comes the main problem - luck of dialogues. I means that’s not exactly the truth because there are a lot of them . The problem is not their number but their aim. If your show is only based on dialogues and every of them (maybe not 2) is about plot whose you will see in another movie, you know that something is wrong. If the plot and character development are main themes, they should have the same weight. Series shouldn’t begin only one of these elements. The first movie should be a introduction, not a synopsis or a big bag of promises which will come to life when the time will come – trailer. True art defend itself, it doesn’t need trailers. Only business needs them.

"HuHuh! I was in the right!"
"Yes, absolutely in the right!"
"I certainly was in the right!"


//Review powered by: Elvis Costello “This Years Model”, Kind Crimson “In the Court of the Crimson King” and Faust “The Sad Skinhead”.
// Thank you for reading!