Mattish said: JessIsEpic said: Just spent ten minutes practicing rock paper scissors lizard spock.. BBT <3 lol always remember paper disproves spock |
| ~May you continue being the Messiah.... |
| Oh, this would be me. And some of those appeared on tv, btw. One of the finest examples, my friend was sleeping over, went on about some Harry Potter fanfiction she had read recently. I was just laughing except when she got to the part of "and Snaped pressed his humongous boulge". That's just odd. |
 Waratte Oemashou Sore ha Chiisana Inori |
| When my teacher had to give me and my ex girlfriend a talk about sex because we had gotten caught in a maintenance room (my friend had a key) we weren't even having sex though |
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| Drunk Dad: Are you gay? Me: look of shock Drunk Dad: because if you are its alright we will accept you. Me: I'm not gay. Drunk Dad: Oh ok was just checking. Yep thats got to be the most awkward one I've had. |
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| A convo where a male friend was basically gushing about a mutual girl friend (one of my best friends) for about an hour. I really didn't need to know about his masturbation habits. |
 Personal blog |
| when a girl asks me questions about how a guy's body works (mostly sexual things) it really is super awkward |
| Not really awkward, but I remember a girl I spoke to sometimes said something to me, and since I didn't hear what she said I just sort of nodded. Then she said "Ouch..." and didn't speak to me again. |
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sinnige69 said: PockyBebop said: Rei-Rei said: Gunther75 said: Lith said: "the talk" with your mother/father tops everything Never had this. lulz. I never had "The Talk" myself. I had a different kind of talk, though, that was on an entirely different subject that was just as important. I was given a book on my eleventh birthday on how my body is going to go through all sorts of changes as I got older...yadda yadda yadda. What an awesome B-day present. you got a book huh? I got a boardgame >< Although it was fairly educational I wish I had "The Talk" I learned everything off the streets... I'm surprised they never brought it up... |
| I recall a female friend of mine asked me, "How does a boner feel like?" I was considering whether not she was implying that she wanted to do it with me or if she actually wanted to know how a guy feels when he has one. I answered after some some hesitation and serious thought, "It only feels good when there's nothing in the way." She smiled and replied, "OKAY!" (Little did she know that "Nothing" in Shakespearean Slang means Vagina) Then she asked me, "What's Erectile Dysfunction?" Very awkward so I thought of something smart, "Ask your dad." |
| What isn't red? What isn't blue? |
| When someone asks "What do you like to do with your friends?" |
| Uhmm, the most and worst would be "Have you seen your parents made out" I mean in the bad way ... LOL |
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| Yea... The time I got a letter from this guy who was just a friend saying how much he loved me... He gave it to me and stared me down until I was like... 'Ummm... I don't like you like that... I'm sory how about we just stay friends?' I felt so horrible... And he kinda just went 'Ummm... I have to go... There somewhere...Bye' It was soo awkward |
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| At the beach. A hot chick is walking around topless, my dad taps me on the shoulder "Look at those beautiful titties, would you fuck that?" Of course in audible range of the woman. I turn red and stammer slightly and he says "Wow calm down don't go getting an erection." The woman looks at me and giggles. I was 11 at the time. |
 I'm a follower :< http://www.formspring.me/zebro |
| The other day my gay guy friend took me over to his place because he had to pick something up there, and since I'd never been to his house before he told me I could chill in his room for a while. When he opened the door we saw his grandmother (who is very old, and speaks no english) sitting down watching tv. When his grandmother saw me she walked over to me and kinda stared at me for a bit. My friend said to his grandmother in another language that I was his girlfriend (he meant it like: a girl who is my friend), so his grandmother says to him in the same language, "Oh, so you f*** girls now? At least you picked a pretty one to make pregnant and make it seem you're straight" Since I also spoke that language, we were both like, Err... |
" ... carpenters fashion wood; wise people fashion themselves" - Buddhism |
| well, this wasnt a talk really, but it was really awkward. anyhow, i was sitting at the place where you go to learn to drive. i had just read for like 3 hours straight and was going to get a real driving lesson in like 1 min. so i put my books in my bag and just stared into space (the wall). then these girls comes in and sits at the table besides me. they start chatting and suddenly one of them says. "see that guy over there? he's just sitting staring into the wall, he must be retarded or something. Freaks me out". and i was like "....." and then she probably realised i could hear her and there was this awkward silence until i left. |
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| Usually I say what I feel with out much consideration. Unfortunately, I become much more flustered when I am in someone's way. It's weird. The most strained conversation I had was explaining to my catholic parents that I am an atheist and a nihilist. The second telling them I joined my high school's Republican association (it's a long story). However, in retrospect one of my most humorous conversations went in two ways. Roommate; you know, Light and L have a very odd and interesting friendship. Me: yeah, but friendship doesn't work very well when both are trying to kill eachother$ Roommate: ah, YES, but necrophilia works very well! Me: true, but where's the satisfaction in raping a corpse? *makes a fist* I prefer to enjoy my victims squirm. Roommate: indeed Mutual friend who was listening in: WTF are you guys talking about *runs in disgust* *** Second situation Roommate: you know, if you like loli so much, you should come my country. (Roommate is an international) Me: what do you mean? Roommate: well, I can't speak from experience, but according to my driver back home, *makes a fisting motion* a 12 year old can take a whole dick! Me: O_o |
| Well once my sister and I were walking into an instrument store and the man at the door said "Hello" and I yelled "GOOD" oh shi- |
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| The birds and the bees talk is awkward and all, but I'd say hearing my mom talk about her sex life takes the cake for me. |
Chupachupi said: hearing my mom talk about her sex life takes the cake for me. That must be... charming o.O I know how you feel.. Except my mom discusses her sex life with her friends. So it's like multiplying that one conversation by six. It's just awkward having lunch with them and having to live through that conversation. |
" ... carpenters fashion wood; wise people fashion themselves" - Buddhism |
| Any conversation at my Lunch table during "The Contest". (You've seen the Seinfeld episode, right?) When the guys aren't talking about their sexual frustrations, the girls are listing who they think is going to lose the contest first. Some even actively try to get the guys to lose. Then they go on to talk about how much they binged the night before. |
| Oh and those that start with "This morning I found my G point" |
Waratte Oemashou Sore ha Chiisana Inori |
| this thread is full of lulz |
ladyxzeus said: Oh and those that start with "This morning I found my G point" Well, that would make for an interesting conversation. |
| Talking to my best friends at a sleepover back in October about me liking someone. That wasn't so awkward, but it got awkward when one of my friends kept saying "I know who it is!" and then a while later saying, "It's me, isn't it?" She was right, and we still had a while before we went to sleep. |
| I was talking to a group of people, and I started listening in on the group's conversation next to us, and all I heard was my teacher saying, "Here, look at this porn!" Let's just say... that was a fun one. Since this happened in seventh grade. =/ |
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HandleMe said: *Flashback to HandleMe most awkward conversation* -a week after meeting this boy and trying to get him to go out with a friend, and him continous trying to make moves on me- Boy from the year above, who wouldn't leave HandleMe alone, for some odd reason and was very well known for his interest in girls, says: Hey... HandleMe, says: Hi.. Boy from the year above, who wouldn't leave HandleMe alone, for some odd reason and was very well known for his interest in girls, says: Erm, I really like somone, but it's not [insert friends name]. HandleMe, says: Who is it? Boy from the year above, who wouldn't leave HandleMe alone, for some odd reason and was very well known for his interest in girls, says: You... HandleMe, saus: Oh.. Im gay Boy from the year above, who wouldn't leave HandleMe alone, for some odd reason and was very well known for his interest in girls, says: ...... HandleMe, says: ...... *Returns to the past time* I know it sound like I was very mean lying about my sexuality, but he was really scary and wouldn't take no for an answer, and I didn't want a boyfriend or to do anything intimate, like he wanted to and he really did mess girls around and I did want to be with somone like that. v.v Well i have no idea what my most awkward conversation was but i think i just found the most awkward post. |
| last year I was hanging out in my room with 4 mutual friends (3 guys and a girl). I walked out to grab a soda and I heard talking so I stood outside the door for a few minutes and listened... Ben: her skirt is short. Cheryl: WHY ARE YOU LOOKING!? Eric: how could you not? *laughs* Cheryl: ummm Mike? ... Mike: *draw slams* WHAT! Cheryl: what the hell were you doing? Mike: I just wanted to know if she had any thongs. I open the door and walk in. and Mike is still standing at my dresser and the rest are sitting around. me: so.... what do you- Ben: your skirts too short *looks at ceiling* Eric: DUDE SHUT UP! *punches him in the shoulder* me: I'm sorry... *blushes* Mike: go out with me *entirely straight-faced* Cheryl: WHAT! *stands up and looks in draw* ...so thats why... me: HEY!!!!!! *closes drawer then looks at Mike* um... let me think on that. Cheryl: *glares at me and pulls me into closet* me: WHAT DID I DO!!! 0.0 Ben: I know where this is headed.. Mike: you don't think she's gonna- Cheryl: *KISSES ME* I love you me: hahaha ummm.... *backs out of closet and hits Ben* Ben: *puts hands on my shoulders* I know you love me me: WHAT!! O_o Eric: COME ON!!! *sends me a text asking if I will go out with him* me: *looks at Eric* NO!! YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!! Mike: *mumbles* I asked first... Cheryl: When you told me you were bi. . . *eyes water* Mike: YOUR BI!!! PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME!! me: *slaps myself in the forehead* Ben: *looks at phone* I have to go. *hugs me and winks* me: *looks at Cheryl* I'm sorry.... but your my friend... Mike: *looks in draw* pleeeeeeease.... me: I have a boyfriend -.- everyone turns white and sits down silent. me: JUST KIDDING *laughs* total awkward silence for what felt like an hour (probably just 30 seconds) Mike: go out with me.... -.- Cheryl: SHE LOVES ME!!!! *while crying* Me: hahaha.. I'll be back *RUNS OUTSIDE* |
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| I just remembered another one. Talking to my 10 year old sister about puberty. "So...it's called a 'vagina', right?" "...yes." "Is that where the pee comes out?" "No, there's a different one." "Good, cause I didn't get what Mom said about that being where babies came from, because you would probably pee out a baby!" "....MOM, CAN YOU TALK TO HER AGAIN?" |
superdum2 said: AcidBlackCherry said: last year I was hanging out in my room with 4 mutual friends (3 guys and a girl). I walked out to grab a soda and I heard talking so I stood outside the door for a few minutes and listened... Ben: her skirt is short. Cheryl: WHY ARE YOU LOOKING!? Eric: how could you not? *laughs* Cheryl: ummm Mike? ... Mike: *draw slams* WHAT! Cheryl: what the hell were you doing? Mike: I just wanted to know if she had any thongs. I open the door and walk in. and Mike is still standing at my dresser and the rest are sitting around. me: so.... what do you- Ben: your skirts too short *looks at ceiling* Eric: DUDE SHUT UP! *punches him in the shoulder* me: I'm sorry... *blushes* Mike: go out with me *entirely straight-faced* Cheryl: WHAT! *stands up and looks in draw* ...so thats why... me: HEY!!!!!! *closes drawer then looks at Mike* um... let me think on that. Cheryl: *glares at me and pulls me into closet* me: WHAT DID I DO!!! 0.0 Ben: I know where this is headed.. Mike: you don't think she's gonna- Cheryl: *KISSES ME* I love you me: hahaha ummm.... *backs out of closet and hits Ben* Ben: *puts hands on my shoulders* I know you love me me: WHAT!! O_o Eric: COME ON!!! *sends me a text asking if I will go out with him* me: *looks at Eric* NO!! YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!! Mike: *mumbles* I asked first... Cheryl: When you told me you were bi. . . *eyes water* Mike: YOUR BI!!! PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME!! me: *slaps myself in the forehead* Ben: *looks at phone* I have to go. *hugs me and winks* me: *looks at Cheryl* I'm sorry.... but your my friend... Mike: *looks in draw* pleeeeeeease.... me: I have a boyfriend -.- everyone turns white and sits down silent. me: JUST KIDDING *laughs* total awkward silence for what felt like an hour (probably just 30 seconds) Mike: go out with me.... -.- Cheryl: SHE LOVES ME!!!! *while crying* Me: hahaha.. I'll be back *RUNS OUTSIDE* fukn halarious lol it is now that I read it,but at that time I was scared and embarrassed at the same time. i dont think it could have gotten any more awkward |
AcidBlackCherryJan 23, 2010 4:54 PM
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| Besides talking with my family and my friends, all other conversations are awkward. :) |
CONSPIRACY! |
corbenic said: I imagine conversations with god are really awkward. God: *sneeze* You: God Bless You! God: ... |
 Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur. |
| My friend lives in a house that is actually two houses connected (duplex?idk). The smaller house, traditionally, was his domain really so we could get away with stuff like browsing hentai imageboards (i am 18) or listening to something offensive like metal. Surprisingly, that wasn't the awkward thing, but hentai did have something to do with it. Anyways, I show up at his house like usual and he mentions to me that i shouldn't do anything weird on the computer or play his violent videogames, which even included street fighter IV. The reason for his mass sweep of censorship was due to the fact that his extremely religious and corporally punishing grandmother had shown up for a visit. I thought," Oh great". I'd say about 30 minutes passed and his grandmother comes back to say hi before she left. His whole family followed behind her to bid her farewell through his front door. At that moment my girlfriend called my cellphone and i swear that my heart skipped a beat because everyone in that room looked at me while slowly recognizing the sounds of a hentai scene where a woman was screaming 'sorry' in japanese (komenosai?) with the occasional grunt and moan of a woman having sex. (the gf picked it out to be kinky i guess) Since the ringtone stunned me, it played about 2 seconds longer than i wanted it to. The first to react was my friend's grandmother, who fainted after sitting in his couch from the shock. I'd say the most awkward part was the family looking at me with blaming eyes but i also have to say that the "explaining why i had a ringtone like that on my phone" explanation to a religious old lady was awkward as well. She had no idea a cult known as otaku or hentai existed. i told alot, and the more i told, the more she hated. i was slightly disowned by my friend's family after that and had to buy my own lunch when he ate...i was so hungry. |
AcidBlackCherry said: superdum2 said: AcidBlackCherry said: last year I was hanging out in my room with 4 mutual friends (3 guys and a girl). I walked out to grab a soda and I heard talking so I stood outside the door for a few minutes and listened... Ben: her skirt is short. Cheryl: WHY ARE YOU LOOKING!? Eric: how could you not? *laughs* Cheryl: ummm Mike? ... Mike: *draw slams* WHAT! Cheryl: what the hell were you doing? Mike: I just wanted to know if she had any thongs. I open the door and walk in. and Mike is still standing at my dresser and the rest are sitting around. me: so.... what do you- Ben: your skirts too short *looks at ceiling* Eric: DUDE SHUT UP! *punches him in the shoulder* me: I'm sorry... *blushes* Mike: go out with me *entirely straight-faced* Cheryl: WHAT! *stands up and looks in draw* ...so thats why... me: HEY!!!!!! *closes drawer then looks at Mike* um... let me think on that. Cheryl: *glares at me and pulls me into closet* me: WHAT DID I DO!!! 0.0 Ben: I know where this is headed.. Mike: you don't think she's gonna- Cheryl: *KISSES ME* I love you me: hahaha ummm.... *backs out of closet and hits Ben* Ben: *puts hands on my shoulders* I know you love me me: WHAT!! O_o Eric: COME ON!!! *sends me a text asking if I will go out with him* me: *looks at Eric* NO!! YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!! Mike: *mumbles* I asked first... Cheryl: When you told me you were bi. . . *eyes water* Mike: YOUR BI!!! PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME!! me: *slaps myself in the forehead* Ben: *looks at phone* I have to go. *hugs me and winks* me: *looks at Cheryl* I'm sorry.... but your my friend... Mike: *looks in draw* pleeeeeeease.... me: I have a boyfriend -.- everyone turns white and sits down silent. me: JUST KIDDING *laughs* total awkward silence for what felt like an hour (probably just 30 seconds) Mike: go out with me.... -.- Cheryl: SHE LOVES ME!!!! *while crying* Me: hahaha.. I'll be back *RUNS OUTSIDE* fukn halarious lol it is now that I read it,but at that time I was scared and embarrassed at the same time. i dont think it could have gotten any more awkward i can see how that would b embarrassing |
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| i have this amazing ability to make any conversation awkward. it is not the best. |
Aarana said: Anytime Im on the phone with a client really. "Im loosing my house, I need money" um....can't get it. "Im dying, I need money" nope, sorry "I want to go on vacation, I need money" Doubly no. "You suck!" Thank you, appreciate that "I hate you people" I hate you people too, that phrase should be banned. "*crying*" Um...... -_- What job do you do? |
| well i am pretty much an akward person some akward conversations i have had are when i was cosplaying nekozawa and some chick said to me at a convention "WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT IN DAYLIGHT NEKOZAWA" and im like "..uhh..i dont know..i just had..to.." imagine that but in a really nerdy voice ha |
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| What the hell did you just write. |
superdum2 said: Sonic_Moronic said: What the hell did you just write. im just saying that talking about philosophy can start awkward or strange conversations every thing else was back ground information for who was there Use more punctuation marks. Form sentences. |
Sonic_Moronic said: superdum2 said: Sonic_Moronic said: What the hell did you just write. im just saying that talking about philosophy can start awkward or strange conversations every thing else was back ground information for who was there Use more punctuation marks. Form sentences. i would if i was useing a computer but i have to use my wii till i get a new one |
| |
| Oh wow, bisexuality grows like mushrooms nowadays. Anyway, want to know more than awkward conversation the most awkward moment of the week, potentially of the month, winning with no doubt the cup for "the most surreal" and "the creepiest"? Of course you want. So, as many know, I have this gay friend I'm very close to. And we both know this lady from the goth clothing store, which I call Tisha in secret. Anyway, yesterday we went to a Graveyard party and she was there. This lady, let me tell you about this lady, she is about 50 years old. She has red/pink/something hair till her waist, but it seems she has not washed it for the past 35 years. It is very possible. She wears tight boots, microvinyl skirts, cyber animal patterns OR tight boots, microvinyl skirts and lolita acessories. And Vogue sunglasses. This lady is very nice, except during the day. During the day she tries to bite you and rip your head off when you enter her shop, while she was supposed to be kind. Since it's her shop and she's supposed to sell stuff. However, during the night, as batshitting creature she is, she gets drunk and turns nice. She dances (like a mob troll, but she dances) and laughs and is awkwardly kind. And yesterday by the end of the night, my gay friend was being almost-raped by this old kind lady. Against the pub balcony. Then she went to find more girlfriends to almost-rape him. Then he told them he was gay and they almost-raped him again. Me and two other friends got the scene at first hand, just 50 cm away from us. After she left, singing Doce, he told us "I'm more drunk now, she has so much alchohol in her blood that she got me drunk through the saliva!" Then the old lady started to cry because her friends expelled her from being goth, because she was singing Doce. |
Waratte Oemashou Sore ha Chiisana Inori |
ladyxzeus said: Oh wow, bisexuality grows like mushrooms nowadays. Hear hear. Speaking of... Last night I was talking online to my friend, who I have had feelings for for a while (like I haven't said it before). She wanted to know if I still had feelings for her. I said I did. Then she said that she had feelings for me. That wasn't really awkward, but today was. We acted like we never had the conversation, but pretty much the entire day I was going "SHE LIKES ME. WHY THE FUCK AREN'T WE DATING." It's just weird just being friends with someone you like and them liking you back. |
| My mom and I are driving up to my aunt and uncle's house. Almost a 3 hour drive. I am in 7th or 8th grade and have been taught about my changing body and what sex means etc etc of course (in school that is.) Me: Well...this is kind of boring, want to talk about something? Mom: Hmm... how about puberty and all that? Me: UHHHH.... It was shocking because she usually avoids potentially surely embarrassing situations. Edit: no wait it was more like 6th or 7th grade. |
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