Kanenone Gakuen is an all-male boarding school located in the countryside of Japan. Although an all-male school is nothing new, life can become quite difficult when there are no female students for miles around. In order to help the psychological health of everyone involved, the school board has decided to try and merge with the nearest all-girl boarding school in order to become co-ed. The boys of Kanenone are more than thrilled at the prospect, and the girls are curious as to how interesting school life might become if there were more boys around. Before any serious decisions are made, the girls have been invited to stay at Kanenone for one month as a test.
Green Green follows Yuusuke Takazaki and his naughty room mates called the Baka (Idiot) Trio, and their ability to talk to the girls without making complete fools of themselves. But as soon as the school bus with the girls arrives, things become weird, hormonal, and hysterical. In particular, a girl named Midori Chitose leaps off the bus and immediately embraces a very confused Yuusuke. Is he a natural ladies' man, or do the two of them have a shared history that he is not aware of?
In order to clear up any misunderstandings that may have been generated through very few positive reviews, I have taken it upon myself to bite my tongue, tie up my feet and force myself to relive the nightmarish days of woe, courtesy of Studio Matrix.
As anyone with half a functioning brain - or a full half-functioning brain - could figure out, Green Green is another zombie in the anime industry's beloved legion of "ecchi harem" animes. Typically raised by necromancers of the "Let's-Impress-the-Writer's-Guild Association", these menaces are armed with bright colours, not enough clothes, and a textbook full of dialogue and characters so embarrassing that
you'll want to hide the screen in shame. When I say textbook, I mean that they've been written to death, like the pen torture from Harry Potter, only it has emptied the archetypes out and filled them with sugar and fat and everything that sells.
Naturally, you will have seen a few of these, and thus should be familiar with the horrifying habits that they get into. Green Green is one that seemingly strays away from these habits, although I don't think it would want to be accused of doing something original, considering that everything in it has been cut from other animes and strewn with sticky porn magazine cutouts. What I mean to say is that it touches on new grounds in the ecchi department, or new heights, as I should probably call it. Of course, there is the issue of recycled characters, as if the writers had never seen an anime before, or maybe seen one just like this and loved it. Every male in the show is a perverted cretin, guilty of nearly every kind of sexual harassment, except the main character, who of course wants nothing to do with either that or character development. Completely oblivious to the inevitable harem that has sprung up (like that bamboo earlier in the series), he fumbles his way through the story, only looking up at the orb of pureness and perception that he so valiantly holds up to the uniformly blue sky. He continues to do this for the entire series, as his supporting cast wages war on one another with fishing hooks, drill-shaped bamboo shoots, and hot-tubs, the latter of which is used in a truly innovative scene involving what I'm sure would be plagiarism had this anime been censored. You should be able to watch the opening to decide if you should watch the first episode, and should be able to use that to skip to the last episode. If you guess wrong about what will happen, then feel free to eat your shoe.
Depending on how new you are to anime, you might be charmed by Green Green's colour and innocence, despite the horrifying images that will likely be carved into your retinas. Not to say that it is innocent in the traditional way, but innocent in that it is a young creature that has not yet delved into the dark side of creativity and intelligence. It's understandable; anime is a sugar-coated piñata filled with cream puffs, breast-shaped stress balls and helium, but no matter how innocently retarded Green Green may seem, it still tries to fuck everything in sight, and your eyes will be no exception.
Quite nice and steady animation. The character designs are a bit on the simplistic side, but they are nice to watch. Funny scenes are drawn very well, and there are quite a few of them. You will find a lot of ecchi (especially panty shots and the "top part") in this series, but not just light stuff. In my honest opinion this series does touch the border of hentai with some scenes...
Now this is something that raises the overall rating of the series by quite a fair margin. The opening tune is average, but the ending done by YURIA is something that makes me want
to learn how to play an electric guitar. The tune is really catchy and the vocals are superb; as expect of YURIA... Another praise goes to the background music, which has especially nice piano pieces.
An aspect on which I can't write too much about. It was poor; A girl suddenly appears and just doesn't stop harassing the main male character. I won't give any spoilers, but the storyline is explained very briefly and poorly, and the ending is rushed. Side stories kind of balance this fact, since they were fairly good, but not complex enough to reveal all aspects of the characters.
Since this is a shounen anime you can expect quite a few (cute) female characters, which this anime successfully delivers. Each of them is different. Some girls are normal, one is tsundere, another is very shy and then you have the weird ones as well. Oh, and we can't forget the teacher with a large chest. As you can see, this is quite a typical aspect of this kind of genre. Most of the female characters have their own side stories, with the main male character of course, which give us an inside into their life and personality, but none of them are developed enough (perhaps playing the game would help here).
Now onto the male characters; There are quite a few of them. The main male character is the most important one of course. He's a typical "good and nice" guy that you'll find in most harem animes. Now, all the remaining characters are simply ugly perverts as described by the female characters. They are there to provide entertainment, and they do it well. It all makes me sometimes wonder: "What is this main character doing in a school filled with pervs and rejects. He doesn't even fit there at all?!"
As I mentioned before this series does contain some good comedy, even though some scenes can be questionable (and some take it too far). It was a good watch, but it's not the weak core plot that makes it good. It's the characters and situations that they get into that count. To sum all this up, rewatching the whole series just for the plot would be a waste of time, but as for the rest I wouldn't have any objections.
What would happen if you took a Japanese porno game, removed all the sex scenes, and released it as an anime so people could enjoy the ingenious plot? On the good end of the spectrum with "good" being a relative term, you get Fate Stay Night. On the unholy end of the spectrum you get the evil known as Green Green!
Green Green is about an all male school located in the middle of nowhere that suddenly has female guest students for a few months as a social experiment. Now the boys must spend those months trying to get into the girls' pants. That's it.
That's the entire plot. The reason Fate Stay Night worked was because it actually had a plot and characters beyond a bare bones set up for characters to start banging! Even Seikon no Qwasar tried harder than this to develop a plot! Green Green has the plot complexity of a seedy 1970s porno with Ron Jeremy or John Holmes. A pizza delivery guy goes over to a hot chick's house and suddenly the power goes out. We took out all the fucking scenes so...they sit around and do nothing. End. Fin. Das Ende
Our bland and shitty MC is named Yusuke, NOT to be confused with infinitely better MCs of the same name. The other main characters are a trio of bumbling idiots called appropriately... the "idiot trio". Dear GOD do I hate these 3 guys! They are some of the most loathsome, obnoxious, odious characters I have ever seen in an anime. They are supposed to be the comic relief, but instead they simply cause the viewer to grind his or her teeth into dust. They were supposed to have an annoying yet likeable dynamic similar to Team Rocket from Pokemon. However, I could never hate Jesse, James, and Meowth like I hate these fuckers no matter how stale and repetitive the Team Rocket Motto got after 300 episodes. Imagine you took Team Rocket's level of redundant obnoxiousness, but replaced Jesse, James, and Meowth with: Shou Tucker from FMA, Makoto from School Days, and pedo stepfather from Elfen Lied. THAT would be like the Idiot Trio from Green Green!
art and sound: 3/10
The art looks pretty shitty, although the animators at least tried to add boob jiggle effects. The boobs look awful, but I guess I will give them a point for effort. The soundtrack...was garbage. The opening theme is J-pop ear sodomy, the background music may as well not exist, and the closing theme is more ear sodomy. The voice acting is some of the worst I have EVER heard in any anime and I have seen most of the Central Park Media titles! This is on par with fucking Garzey's Wing! Also in case anyone involved with the US dub of Green Green is reading this, the name is pronounced Yuse-kay. 2 syllables. It is NOT yu-SU-kay. You dumb bastards!
Enjoyment: "Tamakeri" / 10
Don't know what tamakeri is? Google it bitches!
Green Green wanted to just be another harem comedy. It aimed for mediocrity and ended up with an absolute TRAIN WRECK of a show! I have no idea how the hell this happened. It isn't that hard to make a mediocre harem anime worthy of a 4 out of 10. Green Green just sucked a golf ball through a garden hose in every category.
I shouldn't use a real life tragedy to make a joke, but I couldn't mention Green Green without bringing up a certain "elephant in the room". Green Green is SO bad that it may have actually helped push a famous, mentally unstable anime critic over the edge. In the early days of youtube, one of the most popular and subscribed to anime critic was a guy named "Mr Anime". His last review was Green Green in which he was foaming at the mouth with rage at how bad this series was...then the next week he went on a murder spree and is now in jail for life with no chance of parole! Obviously Green Green can't cause neurological disorders, but could it have possibly helped give him that final push by making him REALLY angry? It can't be entirely ruled out. Green Green is simply that bad! It is the Cthulu of anime. Those that gaze upon it are driven mad!
This is the only anime I have finished that I've given the rating 1. Is this anime worthy of the rating 1? No. There should be a 0. I would give this 0.
Every single aspect of this anime is a 0. When I started watching this I told myself I'd finish it no matter what because I really wanted to see it through so that I could talk about how bad it truly was. It was physical agony to watch this anime and I kid you not I started looking longingly for my kitchen knife more than once.
I have never before said anything bad about
people watching anime and enjoying different types of anime, but this is so bad I seriously wonder if the people that enjoyed this are watching anime for the right reasons or for any reason at all.
I don't really want to talk about this animes storyboard, screenplay or characters, because as far as I'm concerned, none of this existed in Green Green. This is more of a rant than a review. No. This is a warning.
Please don't watch this.
It really does suck, there can be no opnion about this, this is truly bad and that's the only right opinion, trust me.