Have your parents ever hit/beaten you?
Yes
68.8%
117
No
31.2%
53
170 votes
Monad said: Carmine said: Drunk_Samurai said: LMAO @ the spoiled brat comment. You're the one who doesn't know the difference. Monad got this one perfectly. It just depends on how you look at it, YOU may think it's abuse, but others are grateful to their parents of how they raised them. Can't do anything about it. They are grateful because that's how they where taught and besides is uncomfortable to disapprove it since children have an inborn desire to love their parents not to mention they will have to admit that something was wrong in the way they were taught which will bring unpleasant feelings. When i was small i refused to believe my father wasn't a good man even after ending into the hospital, i had to visit a few more times and start reading a few things to realize that the reality i was living wasn't how it should be. I guess if you never even needed to get close to the hospital it will be harder to disapprove it since it's easier to live with it and even accept it as something good instead of putting yourself in an uncomfortable position about your parents or feelings. I see plenty of faults with the way my parents brought me up, I don't feel particularly uncomfortable about it. I just happen to think one smack is fine, as long as it isn't too hard etc. I do stress the one smack bit, of course if they re-offend you smack them again, but I don't see anything wrong with it even now, my parents didn't even hit me much as a child. Well, there were 3 occasions of lost temper on my dad's half which led him to try and hit me or strangle me, but on the third time I stopped him, but those were past the age of 14. That wasn't a punishment, that was just rage. Obviously that's bad. |
InfiniteRyvius said: Monad said: Carmine said: Drunk_Samurai said: LMAO @ the spoiled brat comment. You're the one who doesn't know the difference. Monad got this one perfectly. It just depends on how you look at it, YOU may think it's abuse, but others are grateful to their parents of how they raised them. Can't do anything about it. They are grateful because that's how they where taught and besides is uncomfortable to disapprove it since children have an inborn desire to love their parents not to mention they will have to admit that something was wrong in the way they were taught which will bring unpleasant feelings. When i was small i refused to believe my father wasn't a good man even after ending into the hospital, i had to visit a few more times and start reading a few things to realize that the reality i was living wasn't how it should be. I guess if you never even needed to get close to the hospital it will be harder to disapprove it since it's easier to live with it and even accept it as something good instead of putting yourself in an uncomfortable position about your parents or feelings. I see plenty of faults with the way my parents brought me up, I don't feel particularly uncomfortable about it. I just happen to think one smack is fine, as long as it isn't too hard etc. I do stress the one smack bit, of course if they re-offend you smack them again, but I don't see anything wrong with it even now, my parents didn't even hit me much as a child. Well, there were 3 occasions of lost temper on my dad's half which led him to try and hit me or strangle me, but on the third time I stopped him, but those were past the age of 14. That wasn't a punishment, that was just rage. Obviously that's bad. Fine lets say that you only get a few smacks threw your whole childhood that are not really strong and don't affect you much. Then what's the point of getting them in the first place except making your parent getting some of his frustration out? The child gains nothing except maybe getting the wrong impression that is ok to hit your kids. A wild child won't be discipline or change it's ways by such smacks. Violence bring discipline threw fear. You obey because you fear the pain you are gonna get threw violence. If it's completely soft and so rare then it has no effect anyway. In the end it's pointless. If it extremely rare and light it achieves nothing and sends wrong signals and if it's stronger and more effective it becomes nothing but a fearful disciplinary measure and not a measure of discipline threw respect or understanding. Violence is always a bad choice in the raising of a child no matter how you cut it. |
| Mom? A light slap on the back I can't even recall. Dad? With belts, hangers, shoes and let's not forget the throwing of whatever his hand could reach in the vicinity as well as those long dark sessions in the washroom for hours. It makes him sound pretty sadistic but I think it turned out for the best after all. He's not that bad. His temper is just beyond his grasp. |
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Monad said: InfiniteRyvius said: Monad said: They are grateful because that's how they where taught and besides is uncomfortable to disapprove it since children have an inborn desire to love their parents not to mention they will have to admit that something was wrong in the way they were taught which will bring unpleasant feelings. When i was small i refused to believe my father wasn't a good man even after ending into the hospital, i had to visit a few more times and start reading a few things to realize that the reality i was living wasn't how it should be. I guess if you never even needed to get close to the hospital it will be harder to disapprove it since it's easier to live with it and even accept it as something good instead of putting yourself in an uncomfortable position about your parents or feelings. I see plenty of faults with the way my parents brought me up, I don't feel particularly uncomfortable about it. I just happen to think one smack is fine, as long as it isn't too hard etc. I do stress the one smack bit, of course if they re-offend you smack them again, but I don't see anything wrong with it even now, my parents didn't even hit me much as a child. Well, there were 3 occasions of lost temper on my dad's half which led him to try and hit me or strangle me, but on the third time I stopped him, but those were past the age of 14. That wasn't a punishment, that was just rage. Obviously that's bad. Fine lets say that you only get a few smacks threw your whole childhood that are not really strong and don't affect you much. Then what's the point of getting them in the first place except making your parent getting some of his frustration out? The child gains nothing except maybe getting the wrong impression that is ok to hit your kids. A wild child won't be discipline or change it's ways by such smacks. Violence bring discipline threw fear. You obey because you fear the pain you are gonna get threw violence. If it's completely soft and so rare then it has no effect anyway. In the end it's pointless. If it extremely rare and light it achieves nothing and sends wrong signals and if it's stronger and more effective it becomes nothing but a fearful disciplinary measure and not a measure of discipline threw respect or understanding. Violence is always a bad choice in the raising of a child no matter how you cut it. No, the way my parents disciplined me was far worse than hitting. My entire childhood was defined by the punishment, and that was atrocious. To give you a brief run-down, my parents always threatened to take me out my school if I ever did wrong, or they threatened stuff that I highly valued. They once said they'd take me out because I misplaced my school bag. I would have preferred to have been smacked, though I don't think it should have been punished so severely in the first place. That is fear, thinking any mistake you make or lack of focus may lead to your precious things being removed. A hit is nothing in comparison. They did this from a very young age as well. I would have preferred smacks. What was the point of smacks in that small amount? Not much, I had much more hanging over me. Also, the statement: "The child gains nothing except maybe getting the wrong impression that is ok to hit your kids." Is a cyclic argument, and thus it annoys me. You're using an argument based of the assumption that your argument is correct to argue your argument, it sounds wrong for a reason. However, that said, I think that raising children should be based more on positive reinforcements rather than negative ones. However, when it comes to punishment, sitting on the naughty step etc. often don't work at all, and thus a stricter and sharper argument is needed, i.e. a smack. |
Carmine said: Heika said: Woah, spanking is child abuse ? There's a huge difference between a spanking and a beating, one is controlled and meant to teach kids to behave, the other is meant to hurt, is usually uncontrolled and results in physical harm to the child. I was spanked as a kid when I misbehaved and so were my brother and most of my friends, yet we all turned out to be relatively normal, balanced individuals and I don't know of anyone who suffered any long-term harm from getting spanked. All the rambling about such parental discipline resulting in trauma and emotional damage is nonsense, specially when it comes from people who have never got spanked. I personally wouldn't spank my children, not that I think it would be wrong, but I have a personal preference for other methods. Now, if other parents want to spank their kids, I don't see anything wrong with that. Also, calling people spoiled brats just because they've never been spanked is equally nonsensical. My thoughts exactly. I couldn't say that better due to my lack of English vocabulary. I dislike how people go saying that "spanking" your OWN children is child abuse. I'm watching the current generation grow up and they are the ones who don't get spanked/punished. And hell they misbehave so much, starting to smoke at the age for 13 etc. My mom used to beat (yes, beat, but not that badly) my sis so much because she caught her smoking. And I think that's a good thing. Spank or not, it's needed sometimes, regardless of what some people here think, not everyone react the same to it, but if they are grateful to their parents for it, then let them be. That is definitely not a good thing. I hope you never have kids so you can't abuse them since you think abuse is perfectly fine. |
Drunk_Samurai said: IZUMI64 said: Drunk_Samurai said: Decee said: I've gotten slapped and my dad used to throw plastic bowls full of food at me but I am also greatful to them. Oh and once I got slapped in the face and I had trouble hearing for days but it's my own fault for trying to pull off a lie. Parents can be wonderful and I love mine. I love how you think it was completely ok and think its your fault for getting beat. IZUMI64 said: RenaPsychoKiller said: I was a good kid, so I got slapped only a couple of times, for serious things. Never spanked. It's disturbing to see how many violent parents there are. DevilishTime said: People like you should not have children. Or dogs, for that matter.Yes, when I was a child I normally got hit when I did something wrong, I think it's a good method of education, I'm not against it, I'll hit my kids for sure xD ^because of this kind ideology, there are so many spoiled brats in this word now. ^Because of this kind of ideology there are so many child abusers in the world. ^what a spoiled brat. you still even don't know the difference between punished and abused. LMAO @ the spoiled brat comment. You're the one who doesn't know the difference. Monad got this one perfectly. From Wiki : Punishment is the authoritative imposition of something negative or unpleasant on a person or animal in response to behavior deemed wrong by an individual or group. The authority may be either a group or a single person, and punishment may be carried out formally under a system of law or informally in other kinds of social settings such as within a family. Abuse is the improper usage or treatment for a bad purpose, often to unfairly or improperly gain benefit. Abuse can come in many forms, such as: physical or verbal maltreatment, injury, sexual assault, violation, rape, unjust practices; wrongful practice or custom; offense; crime, or otherwise verbal aggression. |
| wow this is getting personal |
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