| I had a total of 2 people contact me. None of my other friends bothered. The ones I tried to contact only gave me one word replies and never responded again. Covid made me realize I have no close friends anymore and that I'd rather be alone than have to beg friends to talk to me. Has anyone else had a similar experience last year? I'm convinced that there is no such thing as a life time friend anymore. Friends just cycle in and out of your life. Sometimes old friends come back in but friends that are around for the long haul just don't seem to exist anymore or at least for me. |
| I guess I was a little bit more lucky with current situation. Through messenger not alot, mainly with my ex-roomate as we both are weebs and from time to time about university stuff in a group of students with whom I am in the same class. Beside that I am going out in weekends meeting my close friends from my town while drinking some alcohol outside. Because of locations I am very rarely writing with my bff or meeting with him especially last year and during final exams of university. |
| no, nobody contacted me. not even my family members. but i didn't contact anyone either. i understand where youre coming from. it's hard to keep friends. sometimes you meet an amazing friend that you think will be a lifelong friend but that's so rarely how it goes. it's important to not give too much into negative thinking though. there's always new friends to be made. maybe they wont last forever but the time you get with them can be meaningful anyway. it's normal to drift apart, even from friends who were very important at one time. |
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| some contacted me on facebook private messages asking me how im doing |
vidoxi said: no, nobody contacted me. not even my family members. but i didn't contact anyone either. i understand where youre coming from. it's hard to keep friends. sometimes you meet an amazing friend that you think will be a lifelong friend but that's so rarely how it goes. it's important to not give too much into negative thinking though. there's always new friends to be made. maybe they wont last forever but the time you get with them can be meaningful anyway. it's normal to drift apart, even from friends who were very important at one time. I'm not really bothered by it. I'm just starting to wonder what's the point in investing the time into getting a friend and maintaining that relationship when it won't last forever anyway? I've spent most of my life investing time and energy into friendships and for them to end or weaken over time just makes it all seem like it's not worth it. Maybe I'm just depressed and cynical. I don't know. I rate your forum set by the way. Sunken-Rock was dope. Crow_Black said: i'm a complete loner irl and i'm better off this way because of stuff like this. That would explain your 10 threads a day. Having friends can be a great thing. It's just a shot in the fucking dark whether or not those friendships will stand the test of time. I've tried my ass off over the years to keep my friendships alive only to give up cause I'm the only one making the effort. Your experiences may be different from mine, don't let it discourage you, but don't expect any friends you have to go out of their way to see how you're doing often if at all. People are much more self absorbed in their own shit compared to a few decades ago when personal relationships mattered more. |
ZeroflamezJun 30, 2021 7:07 PM
Zeroflamez said: I'm just starting to wonder what's the point in investing the time into getting a friend and maintaining that relationship when it won't last forever anyway? I've spent most of my life investing time and energy into friendships and for them to end or weaken over time just makes it all seem like it's not worth it. that is a pretty sad way to think about it. to me, i dont feel like i'm investing anything when i'm with a friend, because there's nothing to be gained really. just talking to/being with your friend should be pleasurable enough at the moment for it to be worth it. i've had friends who turned their back on me and hurt me a lot, but i don't regret the time i spent with that person because the good times were still good times. maybe you just haven't met many good friends yet. |
|
| I don't talk to most of them even before lockdown, but atleast there were still some who did. |
 In this world shrouded in darkness, I learned there was someone who’d been struggling along with me. That alone is enough.  |
Zeroflamez said: Question is, did you contact your friends and ask good questions? Cuz they can have the same thought process you have that perhaps you're not a friend if you didn't contact them.I had a total of 2 people contact me. None of my other friends bothered. The ones I tried to contact only gave me one word replies and never responded again. Covid made me realize I have no close friends anymore and that I'd rather be alone than have to beg friends to talk to me. Has anyone else had a similar experience last year? I'm convinced that there is no such thing as a life time friend anymore. Friends just cycle in and out of your life. Sometimes old friends come back in but friends that are around for the long haul just don't seem to exist anymore or at least for me. But yeah, it takes two to tangle. I think you can still have lifetime friends. But somebody need to make a real effort first usually. |
Tachii said: Zeroflamez said: Question is, did you contact your friends and ask good questions? Cuz they can have the same thought process you have that perhaps you're not a friend if you didn't contact them.I had a total of 2 people contact me. None of my other friends bothered. The ones I tried to contact only gave me one word replies and never responded again. Covid made me realize I have no close friends anymore and that I'd rather be alone than have to beg friends to talk to me. Has anyone else had a similar experience last year? I'm convinced that there is no such thing as a life time friend anymore. Friends just cycle in and out of your life. Sometimes old friends come back in but friends that are around for the long haul just don't seem to exist anymore or at least for me. But yeah, it takes two to tangle. I think you can still have lifetime friends. But somebody need to make a real effort first usually. Yes I have tried to contact, I said in the opening post as well as another post in this thread. Asking good questions is irrelevant. If the other person wants to talk to you they will take the effort to keep it going. vidoxi said: Zeroflamez said: I'm just starting to wonder what's the point in investing the time into getting a friend and maintaining that relationship when it won't last forever anyway? I've spent most of my life investing time and energy into friendships and for them to end or weaken over time just makes it all seem like it's not worth it. that is a pretty sad way to think about it. to me, i dont feel like i'm investing anything when i'm with a friend, because there's nothing to be gained really. just talking to/being with your friend should be pleasurable enough at the moment for it to be worth it. i've had friends who turned their back on me and hurt me a lot, but i don't regret the time i spent with that person because the good times were still good times. maybe you just haven't met many good friends yet. No it really isn't. Maintaining friendships requires time and effort. That's not to say you can't have fun and have good times while doing it but it's still an investment of your time and energy. So you're telling me you are friends with people and expect nothing to come out of the friendship? such as helping you with something you need help with or having your back. You might as well save your time and energy and invest it elsewhere into something that's worth it if that's the case. You can have fun times and talk with people online in Multiplayer lobbies if that's all you're looking for. |
ZeroflamezJun 30, 2021 8:10 PM
| none of them contact me in the last 12 months even if they contact its about school stuffs |
yarwe said: none of them contact me in the last 12 months even if they contact its about school stuffs Don't give them it they using you bro.. |
Zeroflamez said: yarwe said: none of them contact me in the last 12 months even if they contact its about school stuffs Don't give them it they using you bro.. well i already did it and can't be helped i won't next time tho |
| Some did, and the ones that didn't I did first, but them they keeped it going after, also I made 3 during the lock down, so not bad for me. There was some that didn't but they are friends just in the sense that I add them to my friend lists, but I see them more like colleges or good people that I just happen to know an trade info. |
N04L1TYJun 30, 2021 8:38 PM
| heh. |
Zeroflamez said: No it really isn't. Maintaining friendships requires time and effort. That's not to say you can't have fun and have good times while doing it but it's still an investment of your time and energy. So you're telling me you are friends with people and expect nothing to come out of the friendship? such as helping you with something you need help with or having your back. You might as well save your time and energy and invest it elsewhere into something that's worth it if that's the case. You can have fun times and talk with people online in Multiplayer lobbies if that's all you're looking for. i guess you have higher standards for friendship than me then actually. i dont expect anyone to have my back. it doesn't even occur to me to ask for help. a friend like that would be really hard to find i'd think. i'd probably give up too if i had standards that high. i hope a good, helpful friend comes your way again some day, and to me too. |
|
| I usually chat daily with my friends on messenger, so it stayed same for me, I think we chatted even more when we were stucked home with covid. We started hanging out irl when restrictions loosened a bit so I never really felt that "isolation". For other not so close friends... they contacted me when they heard I had some complications during covid, so that was nice at least. |
 |
| No, we don't contact each other, we only do chatting. |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
vidoxi said: Zeroflamez said: No it really isn't. Maintaining friendships requires time and effort. That's not to say you can't have fun and have good times while doing it but it's still an investment of your time and energy. So you're telling me you are friends with people and expect nothing to come out of the friendship? such as helping you with something you need help with or having your back. You might as well save your time and energy and invest it elsewhere into something that's worth it if that's the case. You can have fun times and talk with people online in Multiplayer lobbies if that's all you're looking for. i guess you have higher standards for friendship than me then actually. i dont expect anyone to have my back. it doesn't even occur to me to ask for help. a friend like that would be really hard to find i'd think. i'd probably give up too if i had standards that high. i hope a good, helpful friend comes your way again some day, and to me too. You could have friends like that already. If you don't ask them for help you'll never know though. Wanting a friend that will help you and be there for you within what's realistically possible isn't high standards. That's the basic standard of what friendship is about. Expecting every friend you have to put their life on the line for you is what I'd call high standards, at least in my mind. That's if you can even find anyone like that in this day and age. |
Zeroflamez said: hows it irrelevantTachii said: Question is, did you contact your friends and ask good questions? Cuz they can have the same thought process you have that perhaps you're not a friend if you didn't contact them. But yeah, it takes two to tangle. I think you can still have lifetime friends. But somebody need to make a real effort first usually. Yes I have tried to contact, I said in the opening post as well as another post in this thread. Asking good questions is irrelevant. If the other person wants to talk to you they will take the effort to keep it going. if u just said hi and person said hi convo ends lol |
| Well no one did unless they needed help so I didn't bother contacting them. |
  "I had a dream. Under the full moon, I was a child embraced by nostalgic warmth. But when I wake from the dream, only a vague sense of longing remains...that, too, will soon disappear with a single tear like mountain dew"  |
Tachii said: Zeroflamez said: hows it irrelevantYes I have tried to contact, I said in the opening post as well as another post in this thread. Asking good questions is irrelevant. If the other person wants to talk to you they will take the effort to keep it going. if u just said hi and person said hi convo ends lol Dude do you even read what you type? You asked me if I was asking "GOOD questions". You didn't ask me if I was actually asking questions and not just typing "hi" Which is why I said the quality of the question is irrelevant. |
| some of them did, but now that the pandemic is mostly over where i live for right now, i can meet up with them again, although i'm happy i lost most contact with some people. |
Zeroflamez said: u seem keen on arguing rather than discussing ideas which im not really fond of, so sure, dont have anything to add hereDude do you even read what you type? You asked me if I was asking "GOOD questions". You didn't ask me if I was actually asking questions and not just typing "hi" Which is why I said the quality of the question is irrelevant. i still dont see how good questions is irrelevant tho |
| Quite the contrary, during the extreme lockdown where there was a curfew starting from 9pm during feb-april, I actually saw one of my friends much more often, as he lives really close. So I could hang out there which felt more freeing than being at home alone with my dysfunctional family. |
 |
Tachii said: Zeroflamez said: u seem keen on arguing rather than discussing ideas which im not really fond of, so sure, dont have anything to add hereDude do you even read what you type? You asked me if I was asking "GOOD questions". You didn't ask me if I was actually asking questions and not just typing "hi" Which is why I said the quality of the question is irrelevant. i still dont see how good questions is irrelevant tho What I'm doing isn't even arguing. You asked me if I'm asking good questions. I respond saying quality of the question doesn't matter. You reply back asking how isn't it relevant and then say "if you say hi and person says hi the conversation ends". You specifically asked if I was asking good questions not if I was asking questions in general. If I said asking questions was irrelevant that would be different. I literally was discussing and you call it arguing. Oh well what do I fuckin care. Not like you had anything to add with your one word run on sentences anyway. |
ZeroflamezJul 1, 2021 11:03 AM
Zeroflamez said: Tachii said: u seem keen on arguing rather than discussing ideas which im not really fond of, so sure, dont have anything to add here i still dont see how good questions is irrelevant tho What I'm doing isn't even arguing. You asked me if I'm asking good questions. I respond saying quality of the question doesn't matter. You reply back asking how isn't it relevant and then say "if you say hi and person says hi the conversation ends". You specifically asked if I was asking good questions not if I was asking questions in general. If I said asking questions was irrelevant that would be different. That's fine not like you added anything anyway. No fucking wonder no one wanted to talk to you. |
| I tried reaching out to some people during the pandemic, but honestly we all have few close friends. If anything, I managed to discover like-minded peers among the social circles I share with my closest friend. If I had to say, I probably have more acquaintances than before the lockdown, since I also tried to contact some mutuals on Twitter, especially those into anime. |
 |
PsychoticDave said: Zeroflamez said: What I'm doing isn't even arguing. You asked me if I'm asking good questions. I respond saying quality of the question doesn't matter. You reply back asking how isn't it relevant and then say "if you say hi and person says hi the conversation ends". You specifically asked if I was asking good questions not if I was asking questions in general. If I said asking questions was irrelevant that would be different. That's fine not like you added anything anyway. No fucking wonder no one wanted to talk to you. He asked me if I was asking GOOD questions not if I was asking questions. So I reply back saying quality of questions is irrelevant. Then he goes on to respond like I said whether I ask questions or not doesn't matter when that wasn't the case at all. I explain all this to him politely and I even mention that I answered his question of "do you contact your friends first" in my opening post. He then takes it as I'm arguing with him. I'm sorry I don't have unlimited patience with Rando's on the internet. Of course how I am on here is how I am with people I know. *roll eyes* |
ZeroflamezJul 1, 2021 11:24 AM
| Yep. There was definitely a solid amount that did which is cool |
 |
Zeroflamez said: Politely? You went straight for me asking if I even read. It's a completely unnecessary thing to say. Later on you continue to jab like how my posts didn't add anything to your thread.He asked me if I was asking GOOD questions not if I was asking questions. So I reply back saying quality of questions is irrelevant. Then he goes on to respond like I said whether I ask questions or not doesn't matter when that wasn't the case at all. I explain all this to him politely and I even mention that I answered his question of "do you contact your friends first" in my opening post. He then takes it as I'm arguing with him. I'm sorry I don't have unlimited patience with Rando's on the internet. Of course how I am on here is how I am with people I know. *roll eyes* Sure my example isn't the best since I didn't add "how are you" (which is basically implied) but you basically dodged the question while simultaneously attacking my character. This wasn't a polite discussion by any means. |
TachiiJul 1, 2021 1:48 PM
| then those aren't ur friends OP. dont waste time with ppl like that and find ppl that actually care about u. |
Tachii said: Zeroflamez said: Politely? You went straight for me asking if I even read. It's a completely unnecessary thing to say. Later on you continue to jab like how my posts didn't add anything to your thread.He asked me if I was asking GOOD questions not if I was asking questions. So I reply back saying quality of questions is irrelevant. Then he goes on to respond like I said whether I ask questions or not doesn't matter when that wasn't the case at all. I explain all this to him politely and I even mention that I answered his question of "do you contact your friends first" in my opening post. He then takes it as I'm arguing with him. I'm sorry I don't have unlimited patience with Rando's on the internet. Of course how I am on here is how I am with people I know. *roll eyes* Sure my example isn't the best since I didn't add "how are you" (which is basically implied) but you basically dodged the question while simultaneously attacking my character. This wasn't a polite discussion by any means. Dude I literally didn't dodge any question you asked. I told you in my first post POLITELY. This: Yes I have tried to contact, I said in the opening post as well as another post in this thread. Asking good questions is irrelevant. If the other person wants to talk to you they will take the effort to keep it going.. That's quoted from the first response to you. I only asked if you read what you type cause you asked me a question I JUST answered in the last post. You took it as I was arguing. I wasn't but you think what you want I don't care. Yes, after your first post you weren't adding anything because you were just wanting me to reiterate on things I already explained. |
ZeroflamezJul 1, 2021 4:19 PM
| I only have two people I actually consider friends, and we contacted eachother frequently. |
| Nope, and honestly the lock down really had nothing to with it anyway lol my job naturally made me lose contact with ppl in general |
| yes. actually, i am the one out of everyone who is now infamous in the friend group for never replying or replying extremely late. beyond what you'd consider late really. my friends have sent long ass messages during covid and i just read them without replying. i'm trying to answer more on time now that things are lifting up with restrictions, but it is still a monthly pace |
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