| is brutal honesty acceptable to you? and that i mean honesty that can harm or hurt your feelings and thoughts on this matter? any experiences to share? because i think i find a lot of americans online maybe brutally honest but i just got a feeling with that though |
| Rarely, because brutal honesty can usually also be expressed in a tolerable way, it just requires a bit more wording effort. |
This dance is the pinnacle of human achievement. |
| It depends on what exactly it is and who's saying it. When I was a kid, my parents did tell me that social services wanted to take me into care. And they'd tell me what to do if I was taken into care (ask for my solicitors and sisters, say nothing to anyone else), and if I was at home in our main home, to hide in the attic that had specific hidey holes made for me. My School knew also, and they said they would protect me from social services, although I never found out if they really meant it. It was quite scary, as I know my mother hadn't done anything wrong, and I definitely wouldn't have been better off in care. I definitely would have been marked for abuse, especially with how hated my mother was, and I most likely would have never seen my family ever again. It was a lot to deal with as a kid, but I'm glad my parents told me, although it's made me very untrusting of others ever since then. I did see those after me too, they came to the hospital where i was being treated, but for whatever reason never took me. I know they came to our main house also, as they went round to the neighbours asking where I was. Anything else anyone could tell me most likely wouldn't be the truth anyway (or pushing their wants or perceptions onto me). |
Little_SheeplingOct 2, 1:00 PM
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| Yes, I'm open to brutal honesty and criticism. |
| "When clouds appear, wise men put on their cloaks; When great leaves fall, the winter is at hand; When the sun sets, who doth not look for night? Untimely storms make men expect a dearth." William Shakespeare |
| Hmm... I miss the kangaroo YouTuber, AIU (AtheismIsUnstoppable). Although he is brutally honest, but this honesty comes with false narratives he sometimes if not mostly spew. I want him back, cause he's fun, but to take him seriously? I dunno. Anyway, honesty all in all I accept it. The harshest. I don't care. Bring it all. |
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| Nah, "brutal honesty" doesn't exist. If someone is "brutally honest" with you, it originates from their feeling of being able to go away with it. Just another form of offense/abuse attempt, they might not realize it themselves though. |
| Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. |
| Online I would say almost always unless the truth can get you in trouble. Irl it should be avoided unless necessary. As an example, if a woman rejects a man for being short. To avoid them getting upset they might say they have a bf. In person brutal truths are more likely to cause a negative outcome. Even some common sense can be harassment if spoken out loud. Online you can be more liberal about speaking dark truths like that height is your job opportunities as a man. |
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| I guess all the people that skinny shamed me in my youth were cases of brutal honesty. Is it acceptable? Of course not. Did I get used to it? Somewhat. |
@deg, I'm going to be brutally honest with you. Every time I log on to these forums and see you're not using the forum picture I cry a little bit. Seeing you elect to not use any profile picture instead of my personalized, hand made forum pic makes me feel like a loser, deg. But I know that I'm not a loser, deg. It's you, you're the real loser. You're the loser for not recognizing the hours I slaved away for YOU! :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( Just look at the craftsmanship and penmanship! Not to mention the choice of colour palette. You think any old amateur could have created that? Every day I get requests from dozens of users for my services in granting them their very own K. Cuddle designed forum pic, but I CHOSE YOU! And you won't even you it. That cuts deep, man. Shameful, I say! Shameful! Don't bother apologizing unless you're prepared to for over a few hundo dollars.    |
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| Hellllllllllllllllllll no, If I get brutally honest with anyone I'm getting kicked out of every friend group, that's why I always try to avoid saying anything controversial or unpopular even if it is my own opinion. |
     ”Someday, i'll be writing actual quotes for my signatures.” - karioka |
fleurbleue said: I guess all the people that skinny shamed me ...are idiots? How the hell is it "honesty"? Skinny girls are the best ones lol. |
| Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. |
Reply to LoveYourSmile
fleurbleue said:
I guess all the people that skinny shamed me
I guess all the people that skinny shamed me
...are idiots? How the hell is it "honesty"? Skinny girls are the best ones lol.
| @LoveYourSmile I mean, I was really really skinny. Most wouldn't say anything to my face, but others really liked to remind me that I was too thin to their liking, and how much of a problem it was. Some are simply exaggeratedly uninhibited when it comes to their thoughts. For better or worse. |
| "is brutal honesty acceptable?" Sometimes. |
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Reply to KittenCuddler
@deg, I'm going to be brutally honest with you. Every time I log on to these forums and see you're not using the forum picture I cry a little bit. Seeing you elect to not use any profile picture instead of my personalized, hand made forum pic makes me feel like a loser, deg. But I know that I'm not a loser, deg. It's you, you're the real loser. You're the loser for not recognizing the hours I slaved away for YOU! :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(
Just look at the craftsmanship and penmanship! Not to mention the choice of colour palette. You think any old amateur could have created that?
Every day I get requests from dozens of users for my services in granting them their very own K. Cuddle designed forum pic, but I CHOSE YOU! And you won't even you it. That cuts deep, man.
Shameful, I say! Shameful!
Don't bother apologizing unless you're prepared to for over a few hundo dollars.
Just look at the craftsmanship and penmanship! Not to mention the choice of colour palette. You think any old amateur could have created that?
Every day I get requests from dozens of users for my services in granting them their very own K. Cuddle designed forum pic, but I CHOSE YOU! And you won't even you it. That cuts deep, man.
Shameful, I say! Shameful!
Don't bother apologizing unless you're prepared to for over a few hundo dollars.
| @KittenCuddler lol i still have the pix save im gonna use it again sometime |
| It can be, especially if someone's unknowingly doing something that's causing harm. With that said, I feel like people conflate blunt cruelty with honesty too often. Just because it hurts doesn't mean it's the truth. It's a trap I find myself falling into a lot tbh. |
Take care of yourself |
| There's no point in brutality. I believe in radical honesty. For me the truth is about being respectful of others, I don't want to deceive anybody. But if I don't like something someone is wearing I don't say "it's ugly" I say "I don't like it". Insulting is pointless and my opinion is not a fact. |
| >acceptable to me yes >do I prefer brutal honesty or lies/sugarcoating/euphemisms brutal honesty >do I believe lying or sugarcoating the truth is harmful to society yes >do I have respect to people who are brutally honest yes >what do I think about people who are afraid of speaking honestly bunch of soft pussies with no backbone, they are so delicate that the truth actually hurts them, pathetic loosers >have I ever got in trouble for being brutally honest maybe not in trouble, but some softies stopped liking me lol >are you brutally honest when speaking to your boss usually yes, and I believe they respect me more because of that |
| I have the same responses as this post above except for minor changes I have no preference, I just take what is no BigBoyAdvance said: >what do I think about people who are afraid of speaking honestly bunch of soft pussies with no backbone, they are so delicate that the truth actually hurts them, pathetic loosers I get it, I'd want you to be more courageous but I would understand if you choose to keep the status quo BigBoyAdvance said: >have I ever got in trouble for being brutally honest maybe not in trouble, but some softies stopped liking me lol quite a few times lol BigBoyAdvance said: >are you brutally honest when speaking to your boss usually yes, and I believe they respect me more because of that Yes, but in a professional-leaning casual way |
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| it's existence is necessary. though those who are about it 24/7 can end up missing the plot, if you get me :^) |
| To some degree, but it should be for the person's good and not said in a mean way (ideally complimenting something along with saying what needs to be said). |
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| if not on a level of long term friend, people being brutally honest is a sign of disrespect for me. it's a give and take really, if shots fired, then it's only fair they get what's coming. if they didn't allow yours, boom you get your answer of your worth in their eyes. obviously grow some dragon skin for online interaction, lest you get preyed on. |
| I mean if you just take one look at MAL at any given time someone out there is having a mental breakdown because another user has called their favourite anime gutter trash. Go look at low rated popular reviews and then check out their profile to see the abuse they get because people can't handle it. Most people don't want to hear what you really think, they want their own thoughts/feelings affirmed. Anything that departs from that may feel 'brutal' depending on the individual. That said, you're all just internet randos and most of you are dishonest weasels anyway. So it doesn't really matter to me. Unless I know you on a personal basis I don't think you warrant much tact. I approach people much differently INRL with feedback, especially at work. If you have to maintain relations with someone over long-term it's a different ball game. It's better to avoid anything that might be perceived as brutal unless they're genuinely begging for their work to be crucified or something. Some artists dig that from other artists they respect. Or if you feel strongly that your friend or family member needs an intervention. I can't see many other reasons why you would be brutal to such people. The most common situation is when people ask for feedback on what they're wearing. If the connection is there they might be more open to being described as looking homeless. Not many people can handle getting lit up like a bonfire and come back stronger. For most people it just makes them feel down, lash out or bury their head in the sand even deeper. |
| the official MAL hall of fame/cursed comments is now open for business - you are welcome to PM me any potential quotes to include |
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