Kindan no Mokushiroku: Crystal Triangle

When it comes to terrible anime, it's really hard to find ones that are bad in an enjoyable way, like The Room or Troll 2. With anime from this era, the bad stuff is usually just boring or frustratingly stupid. So imagine my delight when I finally stumbled upon this anti-masterpiece. It has a plot that moves like a mad lib, continuously getting more and more insane. Seriously, it starts as an Indiana Jones style story, but then all of the sudden the protagonist has super powers and is fighting aliens, then the movie immediately forgets about his powers again. He'll get into a seemingly inescapable situation, then it'll cut to him being fine, with only a brief mention that he has no idea how he got out of that. All this builds up to an amazingly nonsensical ending that had me grinning the whole time.

This isn't a good anime. It's in fact very bad. But it's one of my favorites, and in the right mindset, it could be one of yours as well.

Helpful

read more

Hey, Imagine if you crossed the Da Vinci Code, Raiders of the Lost Arc and a total lack of talent!
Congratulations, you just pictured something more coherent than "Crystal Triangle".

Here a modern day Indiana Jones fights off RPG-shooting Russian Clark Kent and demon monks with Kung Fu powers that are introduced 3 seconds before they are used.
The story is nonsensical, deranged doggerel with a Marty-Stu protagonist and multiple Deus ex Caterpillar plot "twists"

And, yes, I'll save you the suspense. God is a Worm; and not a cool, giant Shai-Hulud...but a sad trifle that looks like it belongs in the bottom of a bottle of Tequila.
And yes, God gets killed....after (squeakily) giving half of the "Answer" that the heroes fought and died for.

Somehow, I suspect this was either a pilot for an aborted TV series or an advert for a bad manga.
Either way, watch Spriggan instead. It's 10x better.

Helpful

read more