Prayermad said: you made a thread on an anime site about this
Mmmm. Nice call.
You silly children. All of us are different people, but we're common in the fact that we like anime. Furthermore, some of us actually DO give suggestions, unlike many of the jackasses around here.
Triseke said: just relax. thats vital. if your uncomfortable, she'l be uncomfortable. Its best to take a couple a deep breaths.
also, be yourself. if you're not, its a huge turn off for most girls. Dont lie to make yourself sound cooler than you are because she'l suss you out. it sounds like she likes already so you dont need to worry about that.
my fiance and i have COMPLETELY different interests. he likes music and movies and i like reading and anime. so you dont have to have the same interests as someone for it to work.
Best of luck :3
This. Good advice! :)
It sounds like she likes you, so you must be doing great on your own. All i can add is this: don't smother her :) Not saying you should play hard to get or anything, that is dumb. But just don't do the whole "I rang you 17 times and sent you a bunch of E-mails, its been, like, an hour! Why haven't you caled me?!?!" ^_^ Not cool.
I have a story almost like that. I was waiting at the parking lot at my school and it was raining. I didnt have a umbrella so this random girl came up to me and we talked for a long time. Now we are friends XD
Like most people are saying, see where it goes first and just roll with it. Maybe it'll turn into something and maybe it won't. Just don't try too hard.
Ok. As promised, I have an update regarding the girl I randomly met. I might say it was very... *sigh*
Here are the details:
So I'm at home listening to a bunch of music i learned about in the other thread and I got this text message... its "Civic"
I decided to heed your guys advice and just play it cool.
I'm like "Oh hey! looks like you got a phone again"
"yeah I did. Call me in 5"
Ok so turned my music down and i called her like 8 min later.
"Hey Civic, whats going on?"
"Its cold. Just trying to stay warm and not get sick"
"yeah. Lots of people are getting sick"
So yeah ... It was a lot of BS small talk.
But then the conversation took an odd turn that I had no intention of taking it, but it was all her.
We started talking about past "relationships". Everyone and their mom knows you don't talk about this shit with "potential relationships". There's an alarm that says, "TRAP! TRAP!" but I guess hers was broken.
"So yeah... I'm going through a divorce right now"
"Really...?" I said.
"He used to hit me. But its been getting worse"
"That sucks"
and then as the convo progressed... a random monster appeared.
"....so thats also why I wanna finish school..." she says
"...for your 2 kids..." I say.
How can I delicately put this...."TRAP! TRAP! TRAP!"
Well its not like I don't like kids... or dating girls who have them. I've dated girls with kids before and its not that easy. It just didnt work out. For this case... I would say it would be better to be cautious.
I go, "so... where are your kids?"
she goes," oh they dont live with me"
I was thinking it wasnt bad. but then came a 'strange' behavior that I noticed.
"so... are you working this weekend" I said
"erm... well... uh.... the thing is..."
Seriously? The answer is simple. yes or no. I had taken a speech class and noticed things about her speech patterns. something shady and elusive. As the conversation continued, i made subtle hints about the "shady" things she was saying and it caused her to completely sidestep my replies.
Someone just got caught slippin, even if there was nothing to get caught slippin for.
So after a while I go,"Well I got some errands to run. Hit me up when you want to get ramen again"
"for sure"
*beep*
Uh.. yeah right
Well... thats it. I will admit I am a little disappointed in the outcome of it. But u know, I think I will consider this a small roadblock on the path of becoming part of the world outside of my anime/video game dungeon. Don't get me wrong... I still think she is a cool chick... but I'm really turned off by shady people. I understand girls arent always going to be as up front as I am but you know... you dont need to lie to kick it.
Well, MAL GD forum guys... I appreciated the comments and the advice. I'm fairly certain if it went a different direction, the advice u gave me would have been golden.
Maybe next time then.... haha (-_-) *sigh*
Even though it didn't go the way you hoped it would you still don't know where you stand, unless you yourself are calling it quits...
If she's getting a divorce and possibly worrying about kids... that's messy. Still, not hopeless. Well, that's life, maybe you two will meet again, maybe not, only time will tell. If you're not getting invested too much, it's all fine.
corbenic said: Even though it didn't go the way you hoped it would you still don't know where you stand, unless you yourself are calling it quits...
If she's getting a divorce and possibly worrying about kids... that's messy. Still, not hopeless. Well, that's life, maybe you two will meet again, maybe not, only time will tell. If you're not getting invested too much, it's all fine.
Just for once I'd like to meet someone who doesn't have baggage, psychological problems, or a third chin...
But I guess your right... This kind of thing isn't worth tripping about.
I would suggest to remain supportive of her without involving yourself too much in her troubles. Who knows? Maybe when she gets her current mess cleaned up, the idea of a relationship might not seem too off the mark.
That is, unless her already having children is something you wish to stay away from, then I wouldn't blame you. Honestly I wouldn't go for that either, because I know I'm not ready to jump into such a serious responsibility. (I can barely take care of myself!)
There is absolutely no reason why I should accept "turn your brain off" as a valid excuse to defend a poor show.
wow i never actually taken interest in posting but this thread kinda interests me xD
after reading the second update on information about the girl i feel that she kinda is testing you so like everyone said before you either don't want to jump into a family or you will do.
my advice is self reflection i guess find out what you want it is you who makes the decision in the end, you have to make a decision that you won't regret in the future