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Raws are up over at Weibo! Wemp scans are still MIA though.
So it looks like Eiji has gotten a better grasp at his feelings for Koharu and may start pursuing her. Koharu, on the other hand, seems to have regressed back to her love-related inferiority complex. Her expression at the last page is just heartbreaking. :(
So with the lockdown and all, I was able to make time to do a summary for those looking for one. This is just too good to not share! But please bear with me as this is my first "public" summary. =P
Chapter 34 summary
After the kiss, Eiji and Koharu take a moment to look at each other, until Koharu gets up and leaves the clinic without another word. Eiji notices she has left her cellphone and calls out to her to no avail. Now left alone, he lies back down, mind reeling from what happened. He blushes at remembering that he just kissed Koharu, and asked himself why he did that. ("Are? Sou da ore... ima Fujimura to kisu shita? Nande?!")
Izumi sees Koharu in the hallway and brings her gym clothes for PE class. She is worried that Koharu may still be sick and advises her to take it easy. Koharu attempts to confide to Izumi about her kiss with Eiji, but stops herself.
Eiji, now back in class, is still very much occupied with Koharu. What's going on? Why did they kiss? What's with Koharu? Is he the worst? - stuff like that. Basically, he's still desperately trying to understand his feelings and why they (Eiji and Koharu) allowed something like that to happen. The teacher reprimands him mid-class for not paying attention, and Nao also warns him for being too preoccupied.
After school, Eiji goes to Class 1-1 to look for Koharu. Izumi sees him and tells him that Koharu has gone home. She asks why he's looking for her and he says that Koharu left her phone. Izumi offers to return it for him, but Eiji says he should do it himself. When Izumi asks why, he struggles to provide a reason. Izumi then mentions that Koharu was lacking her usual energy earlier, and at the sight of Eiji's expression, panics and heatedly asks him what he did. She scolds him for being mean to Koharu and once again demands to know what happened. Nao appears in the midst of their comical argument, and Eiji uses this moment to run away. Izumi then complains to Nao about Eiji, including him mentioning a curse (noroi). She doesn't get it, but Nao seems to have an idea about it.
Eiji escapes to the locker room. Still holding Koharu's phone, he wonders if Koharu may be avoiding him. To his surprise, Koharu shows up and asks for her phone. He tells her he thought she already went home, and she says she came back for her phone. Eiji hands it over, but before Koharu can get it, he changes his mind and tells her he won't return her phone until they talk properly. Koharu is unwilling and tries to wrestle it out of his hands. When Eiji apologizes for what happened, Koharu stops. Eiji slowly looks up at her and sees her blushing. Before he can say anything more, two of his friends/classmates appear. They are still under the impression that Eiji and Koharu are going out and teases them for flirting in public. Eiji tells them they have broken up and while the guys express their shock and disbelief, Koharu suddenly steals back her phone and walks away.
His two friends apologize to Eiji for disturbing them and also comfort him for having broken up with a cute girl like Koharu. Eiji is surprised about this revelation, that a lot of boys actually consider Koharu cute. His only mental images of her are devil-like (when she was still going after Nao) and pissed off (when they're fighting), so this is such an eye-opener for him. Once his friends leave, he remains in his spot and goes back to thinking about that moment at the clinic. There's a part of him that wants to comfort and be kind to Koharu, but ultimately, he is still unable to understand his feelings. (It's a little hard to put it in exact words - it's like he's almost *there*, but he just can't really get it yet) He has a serious expression as he wonders what to do.
At the train station, Ikezawa sees Koharu and calls her. She notices Koharu's somber behavior and asks her what's wrong. There's a pause, then Koharu goes back to being all cheery and they proceed to chat as they walk to the platform. It is here that Ikezawa tells Koharu that she has confessed to Eiji, gotten rejected and has now decided to support Eiji from here on. Koharu sighs, expressing how everyone is so amazing. Ikezawa says not really, but Koharu insists and that in contrast, she is someone who only thinks about herself. She adds that she hates herself for that, and asks Ikezawa what she should do. At first, Ikezawa is taken aback, but when she tries to answer, there is an announcement that a train is approaching. Koharu then hurries her off, changing the subject.
As she waves at Ikezawa's back, Koharu thinks about Ikezawa's feelings, Eiji's and hers. Wondering if she can do only cruel things, she calls out to Ikezawa, tells her that she and Eiji kissed, and smilingly tells her sorry just before the train doors close. Ikezawa is shocked, and watches Koharu's figure as the train leaves. (It looks like she was able to see Koharu go back to being emotionless.)
Koharu is left alone and finally drops her mask. She says she can't stop messing up, and remembering how Eiji offered his hand to her before, silently pleads for him to stop being kind to her. Because it gives her soft and fluffy feelings.
*end of chapter*
Now the last part is a bit too muddled for me. I've read Koharu's monologue over and over and while I have some sort of grasp on the translation, it may not be accurate. But from what I could understand, she said "while it's nice, she's sure Aihara-kun didn't mean to kiss her". She's also looking for a "flaw" and wonders "why she didn't go further". In any case, her thoughts showed me that Koharu doesn't really have confidence in herself. Maybe she's convinced that her love will always be futile, so she keeps on blaming herself, condemning herself as a cruel person (by trying to hurt Ikezawa regarding the kiss, though it looks like it pained her more and Ikezawa seems unbothered in that sense), and putting herself at the lowest position. It's really heartbreaking, this complex she has. She's always searching for her happiness, but intentionally deprives herself of one when it (Eiji) comes her way as if she's not worth it. The poor girl. 😞
So there you have it! This is such a slow burn, but I'm loving every second of it. ❤️
