Born in Tralfamadore. Rasied by the streets. Nurtured by raging wolves and silent sheep. Trampled on by goblins and orangutans. Seduced by the great power of ample bosom. Suckled on the sensitive teat of welfare checks since I was four. Made a man by cheap, sleazy brothels.
Hiiii. *high-pitched Kirby voice*
The government has recently been installing tiny cameras into people's nostrils when they sleep. For more info go to: www.OrphansAreApparentlyPeopleToo.edu
*silently stands and reads A Communist Manifesto when a camera dollies in, gazes up moderately alarmed, adjusts slipping glasses with a slight tremor, and then proceeds to, after all feelings of anxiousness fade, acknowledge the audience* Oh. Hey. Didn't see you there. Hello. How are you?
*you give an elaborate answer as to how you feel*
Oh, is that so? Well, it's irrelevant anyway, this is my page.
You have landed on my account and now must endure my shameless fascination and adoration for japes of the dark and absurdist variety, typically involving but not limited to: scatology, racism, sexism, genocide, self-mutilation, unchecked nationalism, poverty, deformities, mental or physical handicaps, necrophilia, psychedelic drugs, grain alcohol (99% proof baby, shit is purer than yo mentally-challenged grandpappy's raw moonshine. Really, any comedy that has throbbing libidos, volatile verbal lacerations (to myself and others), and mirthless death, you'll spot my pseudo-edgy, wannabe-funny ass there.
---I live in a dark cave that somehow has access to Internet. I love anime (and animation in general) and manga (as well as comics in general)... Okay, that last sentence is pretty much implied considering I'm on this website/currently an active user, but whatever. I'm open-minded to all genres/types, but typically gravitate towards that character-driven and/or dark stuff. I also have a soft spot for sweet, light-hearted, saccharine shiz as long as it's fresh, interesting, innovative, quirky, bizzare, touching, and/or well-produced and written. But again, that sort of goes without saying. Excessively, explicitly, and extremely violent, sexual, and profane anime/manga are cool as well. Mmhmm.
-This description is a WORK IN PROGRESS so that means it's going to be a bit plain for now. This is why it's at least 75% shit right now.
FAQ (Questions and answers so important that this is the first and only time they'll ever be asked/answered.)
Q: How come you're more amazing than my husband, Buddha, and that guy who thought of sliced bread combined?
A: I'm not sure. I suppose due to my irresistible charm and fantastic manliness. However, I recently sold all those qualities for a smart phone... It can take pictures!
Q: What's better than porn?
A: More porn.
Q: FAQ? More like IFAQ!!! (Infrequently Asked Questions!) Dude, your opinion is trash just like your existence. Why are you still alive?
A: Suicide is great. I've personally tried it eight times. Too bad I can't die. Apparently I'm immortal or something.
Q: Who is one of your biggest idols?
Q: You hit on my stepfather's grandmother, you freak! Why are you so weird?
A: I was emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically touched by an angel and a demon when I was much younger. We all decided it's better to just stay as friends.
Q: Why did you sell your soul to the devil?
A: 'Cuz he seemed cool. He kinda looked like a strange mixture of Ronald Reagan, Betty White, Mike Tyson's face tattoo, a breath mint, Tila Tequila (is she still relevant?) and a Red Panda.
Q: Why are you on MAL so much? Do you not have a life??
A: Yeah, I have one. Just apparently misplaced somewhere.
Q: Why did the devil return your soul shortly after?
A: Turns out he's a soft, punk-ass, pussyflower who can't hold his liquor. He wasn't even into gang rape anymore. What a punk.
Q: Haha, you're almost as unfunny as the people you emulate. Do you honestly think you're even remotely humorous?
A: Eh, not really. But at the same time, you're an even bigger asshole than me. Which is saying something. Sooo...
Go lick a long scrotum.
Q: Where you from?
A: NML Cygni. It's a little hot over here.
Q: You're smug attitude, poor taste, uninteresting reviews, and profile pisses me off. When can I burn you?
A: Go lick a long scrotum.
Q: Your reviews suck multple, multi-colored asses. But less importantly, what is your favorite hobby?
A: Playing my electric harp. I'm still a novice doe.
Q: Who is your fav anime character?
A: ....Go lick a long scrotum?
opinion on experimental, abstract, avant-garde, trippy, psychedelic, surreal, and other slightly obscure terms when describing such anime/manga
Experimental, abstract, trippy, psychedelic, surreal, and avant-garde anime/manga (in terms of both aesthetic and story) can be magnificently fresh and interestingly unorthodox if pulled off correctly. It's that risky, bold, and unusual shit really grips me. These are the types that have the powerful capability of being wonderfully memorable. Props/kudos to all those who challenge the anime/manga industry norms, and actually are genuine regarding their risks and adventurous attitude when it comes to creating their work.
Other (Opinions, Quotes, etc.)
Random Quotes For Your Amusement (that I like that I found on some random website, that site I prolly dead now but it's goooood)-
People like us aren't qualified to be involved in a dramatic incident such as a suicide. No matter how depressed you are or how much pain you're in, you have to return to your routine, daily life. Even if you don't come back, you'll just end up dying in vain. A dramatic death isn't befitting of us. (Welcome to the N.H.K.!)
Don't believe in yourself! Believe in ME who believes in you!!! (Gurren Lagann)
I'm mad scientist.... iz soo cooooooool.. sonuvabeetch! (Steins; Gates)
I am Justice! I protect the innocent and those who fear evil. Im the one that will become the god of a new world that every one desires!! (Death Note)
Because she learned about happiness, she feels lonely for the first time. And because she knows unhappiness, she understands happiness for the first time. (Ef: A Tale of Memories)
My love for you is the sort of love where I want to marry you. (Not the friend kind.) [AnoHana]
Feelings of love are just a temporary lapse in judgement, like a kind of mental illness. (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suziimiya)
It takes an idiot to do something cool, that's why it's cool. (FLCL)
Thats not an ordinary star my son, that star is a tear of a warrior.
(Whatï»¿ warrior is it?)
A lost soul who has finished his battle somewhere on this planet. A pitiful soul who could not find his way to the lofty realm where the great spirit awaits us all.... [Cowboy Bebop]
I said.... with a posed look. (Nisemonogatari)
Truth Regarding Mainstream/Underground Music (AKA my slightly generic/half assed opinion)
Honestly though. I do love slang and hip-hop culture. Just not that bullshit that steams off the top of popular, mainstream crowd. No, I'm not saying popular means bad. Good quality isn't limited to underground or depends solely on sales or being well-known. It's just that there happens to be a very annoying and outspoken crowd that exists in the mainstream. But underground has its clear share of cocky, elitist cuntbags so the douchebaggery is almost balanced.
My Impersonation Of My Generation On MAL! ^_^
I'm also like a fan of like Japanese animizzle's and mangos, I mean like manga or manger or monkey I think, Naruto is the greatest ever. He's so like cute you know! Unlike ratchet Sasuke who has... A duck butt haircut!!!!! Hehehehehe, jkjk y'all. Don't hate just cuz I'm obnoxious, trendy, the zeitgeist of my generation, an pointlessly stubborn!! ;^))))) :) :D ;Dddk ^____^ Swagggg swagg 2011 #hashag reppin dem colors u KNO? I like swag and stuff but I'm not a swag fagggggggg >.< XDDD *OTHER EXCESSIVE EMOTICONS AND IRRITATING JAZZ* #Kony2014 #Swag #waffles #pickles #SupposedlyRandom .#GaddafiIsANiceGuy #hashtag. But dats jus me fam an' how I do, wÃ¤t bout you doe?
I seriously do love my generation though. There's many marvelous things going for us. I was just mimicking some of the more irksome section of us.
It's all good.
Summer 2013: Shit I Actually Will Bother To Watch & Why aka Everything Else Can Die In Obscurity For All I Care
"Monogatari Season Two": Akiyuki Shinbo is an Experimentalist spraying his creative cum on the masses. Yes.
"Love Lab" Masahiko Oonuma! Favorite rising anime director currently. He's bringing funny back into slice of life anime. The Great Asian Hope of Comedy Anime.
"Gatchaman Crowds": Kenji Nakamura! Oh lord, many talented directors are currently releasing stuff, huh? He's a wonderfully unconventional director and hopefully this will be a pleasant work from him.
"Watamote": Interesting pandering to pessimistic, recluse, and isolated people. Damn, I should have thought of that.
"Fate/kaleid liner Prisma Illya": Shin Oonuma! Dis dude was Shinbo's assistant and then grew wings and is doing his own stuff. He's slowly evolving and hopefully this showcases more of his obvious, but sometimes muffled, talent.
"Danganronpa": Premise sounds interesting.
Shit im gonna watch
revisiting K-On (why the fuck not)
Madoka Rebellion (I'm pretty sure by this point Gen Urobutchi will find a way to butcher that shit up, I'm coming for Shinbo)
several others im too lazy to type out (fuck me, fuck my lethargic tendencies, fuck my lack of motivation, and fuck me for not seriously attempting to gain any motivation, yeah, just fuck me in general)