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Sep 21, 2019 3:14 PM
#1

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Jan 2009
92560
so aside from the usual just go out and expose yourself to society have you tried an actual social skills training? this is usually done for mentally ill people that have poor social skills due to their illness but i think its also being taught to normies so was it effective for those that tried it? we do not have such services here so i cannot even think of trying it

a lot of this loneliness and isolation and even fear of rejection (incel route) threads here on MAL might benefit from an actual training like this lol

what are your thoughts on this?
Sep 21, 2019 3:36 PM
#2

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May 2017
855
What kind of training do they do for it?
talking to a mirror?
Idk, I've never heard about that....
but I don't think it works for those who haven't mental illness.


"というわけで。待望の、体 操 服! でっあ~る。祭りであれば、余も着飾ってはいられぬと用意したが……うむ! 心身ともに軽くなったようだ。どうだ? 似合っているであろう、マスター?" - Random Quote From Internet by Saber Nero

Sep 21, 2019 3:39 PM
#3

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Jan 2009
92560
@zBluee

i do not know but i remember reading about this social skills training stuff but never the details about it since you know you have to pay to experience or actually learn it
Sep 21, 2019 3:53 PM
#4

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Apr 2015
6811
I personally think the best kind of "Social skill training" is being pushed into an enviorment that slowly but surely makes you comfortable enough to become more social in general no matter what. Just a matter of how comfortable you are.

I was bordering sociopathic from being homeschooled in my house for 7 years of my life but after joining an anime club at my local library, getting my first job, in 3 years I changed drastically to the point I'm called a people person.

The only: "Training" you need is being thrown out there and sinking or swimming. Some influences like these classes can help, but I think the best option is a push and pull, so to speak, for people in particular who are attached to something they enjoy. Like, I don't know, having someone show you around a building who is also a fan of whatever show or band you like. Just takes a small step.
Sep 21, 2019 5:49 PM
#5

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Jun 2016
52
what Monarch-Reli said. social exposure teaches you how to read other people and the environment. nobody is born a natural leader, or a great public speaker. it's all practice.
Sep 21, 2019 5:57 PM
#6

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Jan 2009
92560
DaConduit said:
what Monarch-Reli said. social exposure teaches you how to read other people and the environment. nobody is born a natural leader, or a great public speaker. it's all practice.


exposure therapy is not the first line of treatment when it comes to social phobia/anxiety though (the first line of treatment is talk therapy) since exposure therapy is shown to backfire and worsen social anxiety/phobia and its only effective like 40%-50% of cases, and exposure therapy is more controlled and done by an expert/professional unlike your usual street/public social exposure situations

i think social skills training may have some exposure exercises too but in much controlled environment than even exposure therapy

EDIT:

too much sudden exposure to your phobia/fear can worsen to trauma
degSep 21, 2019 6:08 PM
Sep 21, 2019 6:15 PM
#7

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Jun 2016
52
heg said:
DaConduit said:
what Monarch-Reli said. social exposure teaches you how to read other people and the environment. nobody is born a natural leader, or a great public speaker. it's all practice.


exposure therapy is not the first line of treatment when it comes to social phobia/anxiety though (the first line of treatment is talk therapy) since exposure therapy is shown to backfire and worsen social anxiety/phobia and its only effective like 40%-50% of cases, and exposure therapy is more controlled and done by an expert/professional unlike your usual street/public social exposure situations

I'm not talking about exposure therapy, I'm talking about developing social skills for the average person. I do agree that having someone, particularly a friend to talk to first is important, mainly because if one does not have a reference to speak to others, then they'll recluse or say awkward, or worse, offensive things to strangers and get rejected. that being said, having a shitty friend who teaches you asshole habits is inversely as bad. but like whatever therapy is done for social anxiety, you start small, and you talk and get to know more people, learn what different people want to hear or talk about, and you learn to communicate better. there are complications that come with it, but that's all part of your coming-of-age story.

"You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with." - Jim Rohn
Sep 21, 2019 6:28 PM
#8
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Jul 2018
564610
I got stuck in it because I was misdiagnosed as an autist and it somehow made me feel socially competent, because by god was I stuck with these motherfucking socially inept people. One girl I swore was a psychopath who didn't care about other people in the slightest. Later my social stupidity, as I knew already that point, was revealed to be a byproduct of childhood traumas mistrust and the resulting fear of other people.
Sep 21, 2019 6:33 PM
#9

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Jan 2009
92560
nessarosie said:
I got stuck in it because I was misdiagnosed as an autist and it somehow made me feel socially competent, because by god was I stuck with these motherfucking socially inept people. One girl I swore was a psychopath who didn't care about other people in the slightest. Later my social stupidity, as I knew already that point, was revealed to be a byproduct of childhood traumas mistrust and the resulting fear of other people.


but did it made you actually socially competent though? not just feel socially competent
Sep 21, 2019 6:42 PM

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Jun 2016
52
heg said:
nessarosie said:
I got stuck in it because I was misdiagnosed as an autist and it somehow made me feel socially competent, because by god was I stuck with these motherfucking socially inept people. One girl I swore was a psychopath who didn't care about other people in the slightest. Later my social stupidity, as I knew already that point, was revealed to be a byproduct of childhood traumas mistrust and the resulting fear of other people.


but did it made you actually socially competent though? not just feel socially competent

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Sep 21, 2019 6:47 PM

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Jan 2009
92560
DaConduit said:
heg said:


but did it made you actually socially competent though? not just feel socially competent

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥


welp im not joking there btw lol im really curious since i find this social skills training stuff interesting
Sep 21, 2019 7:36 PM

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May 2017
1365
In this day and age, reading books seem like more of a lost art than talking to people face to face.

I still do both, but you get the idea.
Sep 21, 2019 7:53 PM

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Dec 2018
500
its pretty easy if the person is a stranger, just nod and smile constantly then go home and watch anime while taking shit.
Sep 21, 2019 11:58 PM

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Mar 2018
951
Well, what helped me getting more social and start up conversations is to get jobs with social interactions you can't really avoid (let's forget the quit job thing here). One of my jobs were being a manager of a warehouse and had to talk with every person, some even on a personal level.
Now I have something in IT and meet customers every day. Every person is different and the more you do it, the more you're getting adjusted to it and even talk about the wife/husband/kids home or whatever.

But I guess it's quite the step to put yourself out there and do this kind of thing.



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Sep 22, 2019 1:40 AM
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Oct 2018
1439
I don't have mental illness or anything but I'm not very good in social situations. I'd rather watch something like charisma on command on YouTube.
--
Sep 22, 2019 3:08 AM

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Mar 2008
46970
No and I would think such a thing would be more awkward than normal social interactions.
Sep 22, 2019 8:35 AM

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Dec 2015
7629
I don't know what is a social skills training or what isn't but I will say what helps me which is connected to being in society or to live in society.
When I was 7-12 I had problems with talking cause I had a stutter, so to learn how to speak properly I was going to a speech therapist for 2 years and also I was forced by my mother to take a part in theater club in my school.
After performing like 3 acts and after 2 years of therapy I don't have anymore problems with that, only it appears again when I am stressed like when I have to say something in front of alot of people especially if I don't know them.

Sep 22, 2019 2:30 PM
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Aug 2016
3760
Nothing can really help me at this point. Better stay an introverted kid with anxiety that doesn't get out of the house as I already do now. Barely got out of the house in the past 2 months or so.
Sep 22, 2019 2:44 PM

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Mar 2018
3772
Never tried it and this is the first time I'm hearing something like this exists


“The most shameless thing in the world is political power that can be inherited regardless of ability or talent!”
Sep 22, 2019 5:15 PM
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Sep 2019
993
i've never heard of it...but I suppose if it exists, someone somewhere will have a use for it. I know in corporate settings they have really niche training for employees...like things like cultural awareness, reading body language, etc. I guess you can say that in a way, even the things I've mentioned would fall under your category of "social skill training".
Sep 24, 2019 1:56 AM
YouTuber / VA

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Aug 2017
1870
I took a bunch of communication courses in college and I learned almost nothing of use from them lol. Although to be fair I'm already fairly extroverted, I just took the courses so that I could prove it by sticking them on my resume (I'm majoring in Computer Science and Engineering, not Communications). The tech industry is filled mostly with introverts and companies really want more extroversion right now to get teams functioning more smoothly so I figured I'd capitalize on that. Team leaders also are the ones who rise through the company ranks so it's important on that end as well.

Anyway if someone is really socially inept I could see the courses being of use, but I can't imagine them being too groundbreaking for anybody whose already extroverted or at least somewhere in the middle.
Sep 25, 2019 10:40 AM

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Jan 2017
2362
no but i think i’m learning to be social through my job
i’m turning into one of them
anguish

all it requires is courage and improv, however, i do lean towards reticence.
it is a good skill to have, now that i think about it. you can “game” your way through people, so to speak.
p0ckyySep 25, 2019 10:48 AM

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