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Which of the following superpowers would you choose

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7 hours ago
#1

Offline
Jul 2021
1439
You HAVE to choose one though:

1) can turn a country you are located in entirely gay/entirely straight BUT you grow an extra finger every time you do so
2) can long jump 15 meters which means you can jump for a living at the Olympics BUT every time you jump, the world otter population doubles in size
3) life long ZYN supply which you can use, sell, whatever you want, its an infinite package BUT every single woman you have ever spoken to in person are now pregnant with your child (contactless, there will be no sex)
4) you become the president of the United States of America BUT all states secede from the Union leaving you a president of some shitty islands and maybe Puerto Rico

Meaningfully and/or civilly discuss bellow
7 hours ago
#2
Cat Hater

Offline
Feb 2017
8710
3) life long ZYN supply which you can use, sell, whatever you want, its an infinite package BUT every single woman you have ever spoken to in person are now pregnant with your child (contactless, there will be no sex)


I don't know what ZYN is, but I'll definitely take the impregnation power any day. With something like a customer service job, that's potentially thousands of offspring every month, so in no time, my DNA will be as immortal as mankind itself!!
7 hours ago
#3

Offline
Sep 2024
303
I think I'll go wait in my bubble until Hazelnut does its job cleaning up all the world's current problems, good luck you all.
7 hours ago
#4

Offline
Sep 2016
10138
The 3rd superpower has no downside.
No, this isn't my signature~desu.
7 hours ago
#5

Offline
Feb 2020
7127
The second one sounds okay, even though I don't really need to jump.
Could also solve world hunger if I did though.
6 hours ago
#6

Offline
Mar 2008
49583
1 is tempting but since it doesn't benefit me to turn everyone straight or gay ehhh

4 is the most useful. I can actually be free to have my own country. There is no down side.
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⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢵⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠀⢠⠃⠱⣼⡀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠳⠶⠶⠆⡸⢀⡀⣀⢰⠀⠀⢸ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣀⣀⠄⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⢠⠃⢀⠎⠀⠀⣼⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠴⠢⢄⡔⣕⡍⠣⣱⢸⠀⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡰⠃⢀⠎⠀⠀⡜⡨⢢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣄⠀⠀⣠⠀⠀⠀⠐⢛⠽⠗⠁⠀⠁⠊⠀⡜⠸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠔⣁⡴⠃⠀⡠⡪⠊⣠⣾⣟⣷⡦⠤⣀⡈⠁⠉⢀⣀⡠⢔⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⡗⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣠⠴⢑⡨⠊⡀⠤⠚⢉⣴⣾⣿⡿⣾⣿⡇⠀⠹⣻⠛⠉⠉⢀⠠⠺⠀⠀⡀⢄⣴⣾⣧⣞⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠐⠒⣉⠠⠄⡂⠅⠊⠁⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢠⣷⣮⡍⡠⠔⢉⡇⡠⠋⠁⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀
6 hours ago
#7

Offline
Jul 2010
1906
4 because all the states going their own way sounds like something interesting to witness.
6 hours ago
#8
ああああああああ

Offline
Apr 2013
5678
Commit_Crime said:
BUT all states secede from the Union


That's all I needed to hear.

This ground is soiled by those before me and their lies. I dare not look up for on me I feel their eyes
6 hours ago
#9

Offline
Jul 2021
1642
Well I don't mean to brag or anything but I already have autism. However if I had to choose from the options then my answer is #3 and you know damn well why the hell I'm picking it.
6 hours ago

Offline
Jul 2017
2024
Assuming that “infinite” isn't meant to be taken literally, and I can fully control whether to jump 15 meters or not, option two and three sound like the better choices for me. If I had to pick one though, I'll go with option two. Olympics, here I come!
6 hours ago

Offline
Jul 2021
1439
@149597871 @Zarutaku @wizdom224 yeah alright, sounds awesome MAYBE but what if instead of a little army you get tens of thousands of kids that grew up with resentment towards their father - you. And also, its not voluntarily, even some old cashier you encountered once will have your kid.

@fleurbleue @traed yeah but the Puerto Ricans will eat you alive if you give too much money to Guam.

@Little_Sheepling yeah but in just a couple jumps, there will be tens of billions of otters. Its going to break entire ecosystems and even though otters are cute they smell like shit

@GinInYourJuice I thought about it, it would be a difficult life. You would have to limit yourself to just the Olympics and idk how it works in light athletics but I bet you have to do some competitions to be picked into the national team, etc. So I think that it has to be at least like 20 jumps per Olympic cycle (I could be completely wrong though)
So you would have to spend the rest of that olympic cycle sitting at home doing anything in your power in order to not accidentally jump. No more horror movies. And then pray that the rest of the world hunts down the otters until the next olympics
Commit_Crime5 hours ago
5 hours ago

Offline
Jul 2021
8312
Man, all of those are tempting.
I'm not sure what I'd do with extra fingers, but saving the otter population would be awesome.
Cucumber ice cream is the best!
5 hours ago

Offline
Mar 2008
49583
Commit_Crime said:
yeah but the Puerto Ricans will eat you alive if you give too much money to Guam.

Ehh well an existing country isnt ideal since it means a lot to have to fix from what it was before.
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⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⣀⠀⠀⡇⠀⡜⠈⠁⠀⢸⡈⢇⠀⠀⢣⠑⠢⢄⣇⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠔⣁⡴⠃⠀⡠⡪⠊⣠⣾⣟⣷⡦⠤⣀⡈⠁⠉⢀⣀⡠⢔⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⡗⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣠⠴⢑⡨⠊⡀⠤⠚⢉⣴⣾⣿⡿⣾⣿⡇⠀⠹⣻⠛⠉⠉⢀⠠⠺⠀⠀⡀⢄⣴⣾⣧⣞⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠐⠒⣉⠠⠄⡂⠅⠊⠁⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢠⣷⣮⡍⡠⠔⢉⡇⡠⠋⠁⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀
4 hours ago

Offline
Jul 2021
1439
Reply to traed
Commit_Crime said:
yeah but the Puerto Ricans will eat you alive if you give too much money to Guam.

Ehh well an existing country isnt ideal since it means a lot to have to fix from what it was before.
@traed
maybe you could just give Puerto Rico independence and be the president of the United States of Baker Island.
4 hours ago

Offline
Mar 2008
49583
Reply to Commit_Crime
@traed
maybe you could just give Puerto Rico independence and be the president of the United States of Baker Island.
@Commit_Crime
Puerto Ricans iirc are divided on what they want their relation with the US to be.

Maybe i could just make a cult and rule that way.
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣸⠋⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⡔⠀⢀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⡘⡰⠁⠘⡀⠀⠀⢠⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⣀⠀⠀⡇⠀⡜⠈⠁⠀⢸⡈⢇⠀⠀⢣⠑⠢⢄⣇⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢰⡟⡀⠀⡇⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⠈⢆⢰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠤⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡼⠀⣧⠀⢿⢠⣤⣤⣬⣥⠀⠁⠀⠀⠛⢀⡒⠀⠀⠀⠘⡆⡆⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢵⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠀⢠⠃⠱⣼⡀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠳⠶⠶⠆⡸⢀⡀⣀⢰⠀⠀⢸ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣀⣀⠄⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⢠⠃⢀⠎⠀⠀⣼⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠴⠢⢄⡔⣕⡍⠣⣱⢸⠀⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠔⣁⡴⠃⠀⡠⡪⠊⣠⣾⣟⣷⡦⠤⣀⡈⠁⠉⢀⣀⡠⢔⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⡗⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣠⠴⢑⡨⠊⡀⠤⠚⢉⣴⣾⣿⡿⣾⣿⡇⠀⠹⣻⠛⠉⠉⢀⠠⠺⠀⠀⡀⢄⣴⣾⣧⣞⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠐⠒⣉⠠⠄⡂⠅⠊⠁⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢠⣷⣮⡍⡠⠔⢉⡇⡠⠋⠁⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀
4 hours ago
Cat Hater

Offline
Feb 2017
8710
@Commit_Crime

@149597871 @Zarutaku @wizdom224 yeah alright, sounds awesome MAYBE but what if instead of a little army you get tens of thousands of kids that grew up with resentment towards their father - you. And also, its not voluntarily, even some old cashier you encountered once will have your kid.


lol, I don't need their love or obedience. All they have to do is continue and expand the bloodline, which given the sheer number is almost guaranteed. My well-being or even my life is a small price to pay. Maybe one day in the astronomically far future, humans will be able to oppose the cruel ways of nature and reshape life in their image, but until then, such a superpower will come quite handy.
4 hours ago

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Jun 2017
31
the first one, I don't see downsides
3 hours ago
🍅 Tomato 🍅

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Feb 2020
99170
Ehh. None of those options are good tbh.
2 hours ago

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Dec 2015
8339
Hmmm instead of choosing it would be fun results of each of them.

1 - > I wonder if I would do that twice how embarassing it would be for people after realising that they've experienced straigth and lgbt romantic relationships, especially knowing rural towns and people there x)
2 - > Otters are cute, there are no bad feedback
3 - > If they would know who's child it is I would go bankrupt on alimonies, knowing that there would be at least 400 children... [And if we would count women whom I tried to hit on in bars or random interactions with cashiers, bank employees etc. than it would be thousands...]
4 - > From a low middle class into a president which will still give me more money than a job I could get? What's bad with it and Unions are broken into independent stuff, many people would be happy with that.

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It’s time to ditch the text file.
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