Usagi said: Better to be a virgin than to have slept around with numerous people imo. Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? |
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TheBrainintheJar said: Usagi said: Better to be a virgin than to have slept around with numerous people imo. Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? Because other people have different views on sex. Some are like "fuck it, ima fuck" And others will choose carefullly who their partner will be. It's a matter of the norms and values of an individual. The background also plays an tremendous role. |
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TheBrainintheJar said: Usagi said: Better to be a virgin than to have slept around with numerous people imo. Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? Why have meaningless sex with several people you don't care about, when you could have it several times with just one person who actually means something to you? |
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SnugglyWhuggly said: TheBrainintheJar said: Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? Why have meaningless sex with several people you don't care about, when you could have it several times with just one person who actually means something to you? Because it can be fun and thrilling to do. I would also prefer a Partner you Love because this obviously is better but it's ok to have some Fun if you care about safety. Why not? I don't judge anyone who's into ONS neither someone who dislike them. Everyone can do as he pleases as long it makes him happy and does not harm anyone.. so yea |
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TheBrainintheJar said: Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? I view sex as something personal and precious to do with the person you love, not as something to do for fun whenever you can. I have values. |
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Vious said: Because it can be fun and thrilling to do. I would also prefer a Partner you Love because this obviously is better but it's ok to have some Fun if you care about safety. Why not? I don't judge anyone who's into ONS neither someone who dislike them. Everyone can do as he pleases as long it makes him happy and does not harm anyone.. so yea Sure, if people enjoy ONS, they're free to participate in them. But in my experience, those people tend to not be very "happy" or "fulfilled". Not always of course, just in general. |
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TheBrainintheJar said: Usagi said: Better to be a virgin than to have slept around with numerous people imo. Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? Uh.. STDs, pregnancy? Condoms don't always work, and in many contexts people are drunk or careless during sex. |
| One the most common reasons I hear for not loosing a virginity. (This applies to women too, but more for women due to the breaking of the hymen) is that they want to fall in love first. And that's kind of a high expectation. And the ones that do tell me this don't date and have a hard time getting a bf/gf. My point is, your first isn't always going to live up to your expectations. |
scruf4ls said: One the most common reasons I hear for not loosing a virginity. (This applies to women too, but more for women due to the breaking of the hymen) is that they want to fall in love first. And that's kind of a high expectation. And the ones that do tell me this don't date and have a hard time getting a bf/gf. My point is, your first isn't always going to live up to your expectations. or ur just ugly |
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scruf4ls said: Hymens can break without even having sex or they sometimes rarely dont break from having sex because of a large opening in them with some people. One the most common reasons I hear for not loosing a virginity. (This applies to women too, but more for women due to the breaking of the hymen) is that they want to fall in love first. And that's kind of a high expectation. And the ones that do tell me this don't date and have a hard time getting a bf/gf. My point is, your first isn't always going to live up to your expectations. How is falling in love a high expectation? |
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traed said: scruf4ls said: Hymens can break without even having sex or they sometimes rarely dont break from having sex because of a large opening in them with some people. One the most common reasons I hear for not loosing a virginity. (This applies to women too, but more for women due to the breaking of the hymen) is that they want to fall in love first. And that's kind of a high expectation. And the ones that do tell me this don't date and have a hard time getting a bf/gf. My point is, your first isn't always going to live up to your expectations. How is falling in love a high expectation? Like I said the ones that tell me they want to be in love before they do, don't look for relationships, but want to be in true love with someone else. Almost like they want the perfect guy/girl to find them. And I'm just saying what two of my friends said about the hymen |
| Being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed of, you'll loose it when the time is right. |
 I love Christine "If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary; In proportion as he simplifies his life, the laws of the universe will appear less complex, and solitude will not be solitude, nor poverty poverty, nor weakness weakness." - Henry David Thoreau |
| I don't care about it. I haven't even held hands with a girl yet and I'm 26. |
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| People can actually have sex without losing their virginity so I won't be losing mine till I'm 21 and I still haven't hook up some teenage girls or young women yet. I forgot to mention I view sex as some type of love hobby than most people view it. |
ComputerAddictOct 11, 2015 4:51 PM
| People only care if you look like you're thirsty AF. If you don't give a shit that you're a virgin, no-one else will. |
| Nothing wrong with being a virgin if you simply aren't concerned about having sex and losing your virginity. However, if you want to sleep with someone because you feel the urge, and you can't do it, that's not okay. Depends on the situation, both you and the society can be to blame. I lost my virginity at 24. Sure, many people would say it's late. But what can I do? It's not that I didn't want to have sex before, I just couldn't find a girl. Not "the right girl", any girl. I was a shy, not-so-social person, and there you go. Not all people are capable of smooth talk and flirting. And there is no "the Line of Age where it seems that everyone else allready had his experiences". |
 I respect your opinion as long as you respect mine. |
| There are many people on this thread who have said that losing your viginity and having sex are not a big deal. Some of them have also said that they're saving themselves for when they find someone they love. But if sex is nothing particularly special, why is it worth avoiding until you find the right person? I lost my virginity to my first serious girlfriend, but it happened when we had been dating for only about two weeks. I would say that it had no significant effect on our degree of intimacy or our relationship. It just happened and we had a good time. The last time I had sex with someone new it was a woman I met the same night. It was a lot of fun too, even though I didn't really have any emotional connection with her, or really find her interesting as a person. The 'relationship' broke apart pretty quickly but the sex was fun. So I don't regret it. I wonder how many of those who have said "I'm waiting for the right person" have been in relationships before? Do they say this even if they've been going out with someone for three months? |
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AnnoKano said: There are many people on this thread who have said that losing your viginity and having sex are not a big deal. Some of them have also said that they're saving themselves for when they find someone they love. But if sex is nothing particularly special, why is it worth avoiding until you find the right person? I lost my virginity to my first serious girlfriend, but it happened when we had been dating for only about two weeks. I would say that it had no significant effect on our degree of intimacy or our relationship. It just happened and we had a good time. The last time I had sex with someone new it was a woman I met the same night. It was a lot of fun too, even though I didn't really have any emotional connection with her, or really find her interesting as a person. The 'relationship' broke apart pretty quickly but the sex was fun. So I don't regret it. I wonder how many of those who have said "I'm waiting for the right person" have been in relationships before? Do they say this even if they've been going out with someone for three months? I've been together with my partner for quite a few years, and I still feel the same way. I waited for the right person and it paid off. |
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| >beeing OT: This is still a thing? |
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Usagi said: I've been together with my partner for quite a few years, and I still feel the same way. I waited for the right person and it paid off. What I was getting at is that 3 months is the sort of timeframe where you might decide to have sex with someone even if you were previously a virgin, but which is too soon to actually fall in love with someone. So, how long were you going out with your partner before you actually had sex? And I'm sure there are some who actually feel the same way you do about it and don't sleep with people until they love them... I mean, keeping your hormones in check for a few months isn't that difficult. But I'd be surprised if everyone who has said this actually means it. |
| Losing an Argument online? Simply post a webpage full of links, and refuse to continue until your opponents have read every last one of them! WORKS EVERY TIME! "I was debating with someone who believed in climate change, when he linked me to a graph showing evidence to that effect. So I sent him a 10k word essay on the origins of Conservatism, and escaped with my dignity intact." "THANK YOU VERBOSE WEBPAGES OF QUESTIONABLE RELEVANCE!" |
Nico- said: Yes, people in love always long for the "right person" but to think of people as inherently unloyal is what's incorrect. I do not think people are inherently disloyal, I just think many people who say they are 'waiting for the right person' will probably compromise when they find someone they are attracted to and have started a relationship with them, but before they have actually fallen in love with them. It has nothing to do with disloyalty. Nico- said: If we look at relationships in Western nations with high divorce rates, here's where this will be commonplace if not a total frequency. However, please do know, not every relationship is like this. Like what? Nico- said: I've been in a relationship for 3 years, do I know if my gf wants someone who is still looking for the right man? Probably not, but I can tell from how she acts that she seems perfectly fine with me and what path I am leading with my life (which has direction, just so you know) and that she hasn't really had any "inevitable" change in personality because I'm the old one. I'm not sure which end of the stick you're on here... but it's not the right one. : I have absolutely no idea what you're trying to get at. :< Nico- said: The world isn't meant to be viewed in a Frostian prism, not all humans are in constant seek of "finding the right person," if they've ultimately landed with the one who they feel completely safe, secure, and satisfied with, and in fact, if you talked to my gf now, I know she'd be very critical of those people, both male and female, who can't settle down. If anything, I'm the one who had to settle down second, because both of us feel "settled down" I think it's safe to say there is no direct conclusion that in three months or later, that people will inevitably search for the right man because it is part of an individualistic culture. Maybe people have found their solace once and for all, it comes at a certain time, even though not everyone is like this. I think you need to see it from other perspectives in which judgments about people being inherently in a soul search can be given exception. I knew my post was a bit rambling, but I didn't realise it was so unclear. My point was that I think most of these guys who are saying they will wait for the right person will probably go with someone sooner instead of waiting until true love develops. That's all I meant. |
| Losing an Argument online? Simply post a webpage full of links, and refuse to continue until your opponents have read every last one of them! WORKS EVERY TIME! "I was debating with someone who believed in climate change, when he linked me to a graph showing evidence to that effect. So I sent him a 10k word essay on the origins of Conservatism, and escaped with my dignity intact." "THANK YOU VERBOSE WEBPAGES OF QUESTIONABLE RELEVANCE!" |
AnnoKano said: What I was getting at is that 3 months is the sort of timeframe where you might decide to have sex with someone even if you were previously a virgin, but which is too soon to actually fall in love with someone. So, how long were you going out with your partner before you actually had sex? And I'm sure there are some who actually feel the same way you do about it and don't sleep with people until they love them... I mean, keeping your hormones in check for a few months isn't that difficult. But I'd be surprised if everyone who has said this actually means it. We had sex pretty early into our relationship, however we already had strong feelings for each other at the start of our relationship. We kind of started out on bad terms and clashed with one another, but we eventually became friends once we got past our wrong first impressions. We really got to know each other as friends and became pretty close. We shared all kinds of personal stuff with each other and talked to each other all of the time. It was after we had already gotten close and realized that we had strong feelings for each other that our relationship started. By the time we had sex we knew we were in love with each other and that is why we decided to do it. Blarey said: Unless you are firm Christian, your "values" are probably just an excuse. Sex feels good and is fun to do, you can keep your values if you want. You don't have to be in love to connect with someone physically and emotionally. Sex is good for the mind. I'm not religious. There is no "excuse" for wanting to value sex as something personal and special with a person you are actually in love with. Some people genuinely view sex as an act of love. |
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| Being r3al, this thread is actually pretty decent. The original post and thread title is shit, but the rest of it is fairly respectable. Well done, bros. |
| We'd have a lot more wizards. |
 "The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." -Friedrich Nietzsche |
Usagi said: AnnoKano said: What I was getting at is that 3 months is the sort of timeframe where you might decide to have sex with someone even if you were previously a virgin, but which is too soon to actually fall in love with someone. So, how long were you going out with your partner before you actually had sex? And I'm sure there are some who actually feel the same way you do about it and don't sleep with people until they love them... I mean, keeping your hormones in check for a few months isn't that difficult. But I'd be surprised if everyone who has said this actually means it. We had sex pretty early into our relationship, however we already had strong feelings for each other at the start of our relationship. We kind of started out on bad terms and clashed with one another, but we eventually became friends once we got past our wrong first impressions. We really got to know each other as friends and became pretty close. We shared all kinds of personal stuff with each other and talked to each other all of the time. It was after we had already gotten close and realized that we had strong feelings for each other that our relationship started. By the time we had sex we knew we were in love with each other and that is why we decided to do it. Sounds pretty ambiguous to me. Although all of my romantic relationships were with people I had never known before so perhaps I can't compare. |
| Losing an Argument online? Simply post a webpage full of links, and refuse to continue until your opponents have read every last one of them! WORKS EVERY TIME! "I was debating with someone who believed in climate change, when he linked me to a graph showing evidence to that effect. So I sent him a 10k word essay on the origins of Conservatism, and escaped with my dignity intact." "THANK YOU VERBOSE WEBPAGES OF QUESTIONABLE RELEVANCE!" |
AnnoKano said: I knew my post was a bit rambling, but I didn't realise it was so unclear. My point was that I think most of these guys who are saying they will wait for the right person will probably go with someone sooner instead of waiting until true love develops. That's all I meant. Confirmed. No one can tell me otherwise. If you're feeling strongly attracted to each other and you both have the Opportunity it's inplausible (and quite unnesseacary) if you don't. At least if you actually want to and deny it for some reasons - not only in Front of others but also to yourself. If you're absolutely not wanting for whatever reason there is there could be still a possibilty because that Kind of Situation leads to change minds faster than you can imagine. And while some People here Claim they don't give a Shit it's kind of Sad to hear that most are just Rant about how unneassecary this is. How are you able to judge? I can accept if you say you've excluded this from your Life for any Reason but isn't it somehow hypocratic to have such a harsh Opinion? Anti-Illuminatus said: Being r3al, this thread is actually pretty decent. The original post and thread title is shit, but the rest of it is fairly respectable. Well done, bros. Actually I think that People just got that it was meant as a Casual Discussion on this Topic. And i'd rather Prefer to Backup a Discussion with something People can Relate to instead of a One Liner like "What do you think about Virginity. DISCUSS" Don't get me wrong i don't claim anything.. just wondering. |
ViousOct 11, 2015 7:02 PM
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Nico- said: Anno, what I'm trying to say is, people eventually settle down if they choose to. Life isn't all about searching, it's about finding. But of course we do live in a culture that emphasizes search over find. I just wanted to say there are exceptions to which people end their search once they've learned to settle down with the right person. If a person reconsiders, it doesn't mean they've found the right person. Call it hard determinism, but it's right one way or another with how poorly-constructed most relationships are indeed. Right, I see what you mean now. As far as relationships go I agree with you, but I do not think it is as you say when it comes to having sex. I think many people will capitulate not because they're ready to settle down but because they do not really believe sex is actually so important after all. |
| Losing an Argument online? Simply post a webpage full of links, and refuse to continue until your opponents have read every last one of them! WORKS EVERY TIME! "I was debating with someone who believed in climate change, when he linked me to a graph showing evidence to that effect. So I sent him a 10k word essay on the origins of Conservatism, and escaped with my dignity intact." "THANK YOU VERBOSE WEBPAGES OF QUESTIONABLE RELEVANCE!" |
AnnoKano said: Sounds pretty ambiguous to me. Although all of my romantic relationships were with people I had never known before so perhaps I can't compare. I don't think so. We were already settled on committing to each other at that point in time and had discussed our feelings. I guess things just played out a bit differently for us than it does with some others. |
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AnnoKano said: I wonder how many of those who have said "I'm waiting for the right person" have been in relationships before? Do they say this even if they've been going out with someone for three months? Only been in one beforehand. I'm not sure about "waiting for the right person", but I wouldn't want to bang anyone I felt uncomfortable with. There needs to be some kind of "connection", so to speak, otherwise I just feel like I wouldn't be enjoying it at all. |
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SnugglyWhuggly said: AnnoKano said: I wonder how many of those who have said "I'm waiting for the right person" have been in relationships before? Do they say this even if they've been going out with someone for three months? Only been in one beforehand. I'm not sure about "waiting for the right person", but I wouldn't want to bang anyone I felt uncomfortable with. There needs to be some kind of "connection", so to speak, otherwise I just feel like I wouldn't be enjoying it at all. Isn't it obvious that you should feel comfortable? Why should you do something you dont want to. It's about People claiming they don't give Shit and don't want to even if they could.. i've never brought the Aspect that it has to be any Person. It has to be a Person you feel Comfortable with. I guessed this was clear enough since anything else is absoute nonsense This Person might be "the Right one" it also might be just someone you're attracted to.. this sort of things can happen instantly to be honest.. it's not even about if you wnt them to |
ViousOct 11, 2015 7:02 PM
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Vious said: Isn't it obvious that you should feel comfortable? Why should you do something you dont want to. You'd be surprised... |
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Blarey said: You don't have to be in love to experience that. Real love takes years of getting to know someone. It doesn't have to be an act of love, but more of connecting further. There is a reason sex feels good and we should be able to feel it with another person whenever we want. It doesn't make you morally better and it doesn't mean you have more "values" than another person who doesn't choose to put their desires on hold for some imaginary reason. I'm sorry that me personally viewing sex as an act of love seems to bother you so much? Also, I never said that I have more values than anyone else. Everyone has their own values, so you should really relax. |
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Usagi said: TheBrainintheJar said: Why? Sex is fun. Why not have it if you can? I view sex as something personal and precious to do with the person you love, not as something to do for fun whenever you can. I have values. I understand your view about sex. I'm similar to you. I'd rather have sex with female friends than with a person I know for barely 24 hours. That said, what do you mean 'I have values'? Do you think having a lot of sex with a lot of people is immoral? If so, why? Since this is popped up: I'd rather have sex with a girl I'm in love with than casual. Love and romance are sexy. |
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TheBrainintheJar said: I understand your view about sex. I'm similar to you. I'd rather have sex with female friends than with a person I know for barely 24 hours. That said, what do you mean 'I have values'? Do you think having a lot of sex with a lot of people is immoral? If so, why? Since this is popped up: I'd rather have sex with a girl I'm in love with than casual. Love and romance are sexy. I mean that I have values that are important to me and that I feel strongly about. I would say that my values are a big part of who I am. I can't say that it is a lifestyle choice that I particularly agree with, but people are free to live their lives how they see fit (as long as they aren't harming anyone anyways). I'm not going to tell someone they are wrong for how they decide to live their lives, but I'm also going to be honest and not pretend like I agree with it when I don't. Some people find sex as something to do for fun and think that having multiple partners is acceptable, but I'm going to disagree since that is the exact opposite of how I feel towards the subject. That much is only natural. |
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| People give way too many shits about virgnity. You fucked someone, great. Have a medal, not like billions of people ever done that before. |
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Gholy said: Nico- said: /r9k/ |
| People need to chill out about virginity and having sex and just let it happen naturally. |
Blarey said: I'm sorry debating online puts you on edge. I don't see anywhere in my comment that made it seem like I was mad or bothered in any way. Casual discussion was normal I thought. I'm perfectly calm. It's only natural that someone is going to be under the impression that a person is coming off a tad bit aggressively when they sort of just appear and say that the other person's "values" are excuses and imaginary reasons unless they are religious. Judging by the way you kept saying "values" after quoting me, I have been under the assumption you think that I feel my values make me more morally just than others and are personally displeased from how you interrupted my original post. Correct me if I'm wrong. |
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JD2411 said: lolzIt makes you an independent thinker and not a mindless puppet to society and the government. |
| seriously, though there's nothing special about being a virgin/not a virgin - you just haven't had sex yet, and nobody really needs to know either way - if they do they probably want to fuck ya anyway so, yea |
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