| Example A^ |
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
Korrvo said: Example A^ The issues you cited translate into "IRL" relationships as well. People often hide their true selves or try to be something they're not. Only once you spent enough time with them do their true colors finally show. Maybe the problem doesn't lay solely in the medium, but in the person who keeps having the bad experiences. |
 |
| The medium is consistent for all of my social issues. This simply doesn't happen IRL for me. When I'm talking to someone IRL, I can understand them way better. I can see the expression on their face, I can hear the tone in their voice, I can see what they are talking about first hand. I can have a better understanding of the kind of person they are, and I can act accordingly. They can also better see who I am and how I act as well. The way I act on the internet and the diction I use in my writing simply does not match their IRL equivalent for me. My personality and tone of voice are way different. Yea, the problems are there for IRL as well, but they are so minor by comparison than it's not anywhere near as significant as an issue. But with the internet, there's so many more assumptions that have to come into play that it causes so many inevitable issues. Is that my fault? Am I using the internet wrong? Possibly. I won't deny for a second that I've fucked up a lot, cause I KNOW I've fucked up a lot, but regardless, this would have never happened if this wasn't on the internet. And understanding is just one issue out of many. The internet is such a shallow experience for so many more reasons than just understanding that I hesitate to refer to anyone online as "friend" anyway, cause I certainly can't act like one on here, nor can I expect anyone else to do the same. |
KorrvoMar 4, 2015 8:11 PM
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
| no since the person on the other end would not value the friendship |
| RRRRRRRRRR |
| The internet has been shallow for you. It doesn't mean it has been shallow for everyone then. The "expressions and tones" you hear and see can be lies as well. It's all subjective to your personal qualms. |
Korrvo said: The medium is consistent for all of my social issues. This simply doesn't happen IRL for me. When I'm talking to someone IRL, I can understand them way better. I can see the expression on their face, I can hear the tone in their voice, I can see what they are talking about first hand. I can have a better understanding of the kind of person they are, and I can act accordingly. They can also better see who I am and how I act as well. The way I act on the internet and the diction I use in my writing simply does not match their IRL equivalent for me. My personality and tone of voice are way different. Yea, the problems are there for IRL as well, but they are so minor by comparison than it's not anywhere near as significant as an issue. But with the internet, there's so many more assumptions that have to come into play that it causes so many inevitable issues. Is that my fault? Am I using the internet wrong? Possibly. I won't deny for a second that I've fucked up a lot, cause I KNOW I've fucked up a lot, but regardless, this would have never happened if this wasn't on the internet. And understanding is just one issue out of many. The internet is such a shallow experience for so many more reasons than just understanding that I hesitate to refer to anyone online as "friend" anyway, cause I certainly can't act like one on here, nor can I expect anyone else to do the same. The internet highlighting weaknesses within the person, a plausible explanation. However the weaknesses still remain and will most likely be evident in all relationships. Hopefully you've learned your lesson by now if that is the case. Text base communication is shallow and it takes extra effort to be meaningful. Also, there are different types of people in the world and some may be better able to connect over such means that others. One person can't speak for everyone. While I've changed how I deal with people over the internet(to great success) and in the end I can't honestly say I take online friendships quite as seriously as ones with people "IRL" I still feel there are meaningful connections to be made over the internet. They just have to be approached differently. To this day there only remains one whom I regret my time with. |
|
| Yes |
cause said: I'm aware. That's why I said I was heavily biased.The internet has been shallow for you. It doesn't mean it has been shallow for everyone then. The "expressions and tones" you hear and see can be lies as well. It's all subjective to your personal qualms. _Myst said: The only thing the internet can highlight is how shitty of a medium it is for communication. Good job at keeping the salt buckets hidden. /s The internet highlighting weaknesses within the person, a plausible explanation. However the weaknesses still remain and will most likely be evident in all relationships. Hopefully you've learned your lesson by now if that is the case. Text base communication is shallow and it takes extra effort to be meaningful. Also, there are different types of people in the world and some may be better able to connect over such means that others. One person can't speak for everyone. While I've changed how I deal with people over the internet(to great success) and in the end I can't honestly say I take online friendships quite as seriously as ones with people "IRL" I still feel there are meaningful connections to be made over the internet. They just have to be approached differently. To this day there only remains one whom I regret my time with. Yea, there's potential there, but it's not worth the bother. I'm not so desperate that I'd be willing to take something so shallow so seriously. If I'm gonna work for something, I'm gonna go for the stuff that's actually worth a damn. The only thing internet-exclusive social media is good at is passing the time. Take it any more seriously than that and you're insulting yourself. |
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
| but there's an easy way around it! you just have to meet them in person because of convenience! |
 |
Zetrin said: Can you taxi usbut there's an easy way around it! you just have to meet them in person because of convenience! |
 |
Korrvo said: cause said: I'm aware. That's why I said I was heavily biased.The internet has been shallow for you. It doesn't mean it has been shallow for everyone then. The "expressions and tones" you hear and see can be lies as well. It's all subjective to your personal qualms. _Myst said: The only thing the internet can highlight is how shitty of a medium it is for communication. Good job at keeping the salt buckets hidden. /s The internet highlighting weaknesses within the person, a plausible explanation. However the weaknesses still remain and will most likely be evident in all relationships. Hopefully you've learned your lesson by now if that is the case. Text base communication is shallow and it takes extra effort to be meaningful. Also, there are different types of people in the world and some may be better able to connect over such means that others. One person can't speak for everyone. While I've changed how I deal with people over the internet(to great success) and in the end I can't honestly say I take online friendships quite as seriously as ones with people "IRL" I still feel there are meaningful connections to be made over the internet. They just have to be approached differently. To this day there only remains one whom I regret my time with. Yea, there's potential there, but it's not worth the bother. I'm not so desperate that I'd be willing to take something so shallow so seriously. If I'm gonna work for something, I'm gonna go for the stuff that's actually worth a damn. The only thing internet-exclusive social media is good at is passing the time. Take it any more seriously than that and you're insulting yourself. Need to take a good long look at yourself before you criticize anyone. A little birdy pointed out the real salt buckets. XD (This is too much fun) |
_MystMar 4, 2015 9:24 PM
|
| I, too, feel better when others can relate with my own shittiness. You better appreciate that little birdy. Yea, I'm salty, but it has nothing to do with what's happened prior to this. That would imply I thought that significantly of someone I don't give give a shit about. I'm salty cause some fuck has the audacity to try and pick a fight with me for some stupid reason that I couldn't give a shit about, and then proceed to publicly tell me he knows more about my own mindset than I do, forcing me to spend time clarifying bullshit when I could be doing something else. You can play the blame game to make yourself feel better all you want, but don't annoy me with that shit. I couldn't care less. |
KorrvoMar 4, 2015 9:14 PM
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
| both are worthless. |
 |
| Definitely. I have lots of really close online friends which I've known for years. |
| I don't have either. But if I did, I think both could equally as valuable. With the internet, it's easy to search for your interests and find people who like the same interests. It's all about what you have in common. And then just like in real life, you can click with certain people online. |
AnimeFreak-San said: I don't have either i'll be your friend |
| I'll stick with the notion "A friend is a friend despite how you communicate". There are drawbacks to both types of friendships; sure. But I don't understand how 'tangibility' becomes the deciding factor of which friendship is better. What if you can't 'touch' the other person? does that remove any credit from your friendship? People who complain that they can't 'touch' their online friends just seem to me that even online, they're looking for sex friends rather friends. |
[i]"Yet each man kills the thing he loves, [/i]By each let this be heard, Some do it with a bitter look, Some with a flattering word, The coward does it with a kiss, The brave man with a sword!'' ~Oscar |
geniobastardo said: People who complain that they can't 'touch' their online friends just seem to me that even online, they're looking for sex friends rather friends. People who are suspicious of online friendships, but are a-okay with walking out to a party and meeting people are living in a contradiction. |
| But with online convos it's hard to discern tone, humor, etc.. And that can really change the dynamic between two people. I use online dating - cuz i don't like bars/clubs - and I've set up some "rules" for myself along the lines of: A) Date will never be the person they seem to be online. This is just how it works. Whatever you assume, no matter how much you talk, they're different in person. B) Honeymoon periods exist and are seemingly permanent online. People will not show their true colors until you've met in person and even with that not for some time. C) People be crazy. |
cause said: geniobastardo said: People who complain that they can't 'touch' their online friends just seem to me that even online, they're looking for sex friends rather friends. People who are suspicious of online friendships, but are a-okay with walking out to a party and meeting people are living in a contradiction. I wouldn't immediately call someone i met at a party a friend. An acquaintance who I might want to get to know better, but not a friend. Like coworkers - they are NOT your friends in 99% of situations despite positive interactions on a typical basis. This si not just my life experience talking, but other people's as well. Coworkers are people being paid to be nice to you. Thinking your coworkers are your "friends" and putting them on your facebook and social media and other such things so they can tell your boss you got drunk and came in hungover is the worst. idea. ever. |
aloricg said: But with online convos it's hard to discern tone, humor, etc.. And that can really change the dynamic between two people. I use online dating - cuz i don't like bars/clubs - and I've set up some "rules" for myself along the lines of: A) Date will never be the person they seem to be online. This is just how it works. Whatever you assume, no matter how much you talk, they're different in person. B) Honeymoon periods exist and are seemingly permanent online. People will not show their true colors until you've met in person and even with that not for some time. C) People be crazy. Have you ever met someone you met online or are you just making this up |
aloricg said: A) Date will never be the person they seem to be online. This is just how it works. Whatever you assume, no matter how much you talk, they're different in person. Maybe your online friendship was a failure that the guy/girl turned out to be different. 'Prying' into the other person is an important part of the friendship. Everyone puts up a natural barrier or a masquerade if that's what you prefer. Friendship begins when you look beyond the barrier. |
[i]"Yet each man kills the thing he loves, [/i]By each let this be heard, Some do it with a bitter look, Some with a flattering word, The coward does it with a kiss, The brave man with a sword!'' ~Oscar |
geniobastardo said: aloricg said: A) Date will never be the person they seem to be online. This is just how it works. Whatever you assume, no matter how much you talk, they're different in person. Maybe your online friendship was a failure that the guy/girl turned out to be different. 'Prying' into the other person is an important part of the friendship. Everyone puts up a natural barrier or a masquerade if that's what you prefer. Friendship begins when you look beyond the barrier. On top of the fact this exact same thing can happen with a person you first meet in person too. People sometimes are not who they seem to be when you first meet. |
cause said: aloricg said: But with online convos it's hard to discern tone, humor, etc.. And that can really change the dynamic between two people. I use online dating - cuz i don't like bars/clubs - and I've set up some "rules" for myself along the lines of: A) Date will never be the person they seem to be online. This is just how it works. Whatever you assume, no matter how much you talk, they're different in person. B) Honeymoon periods exist and are seemingly permanent online. People will not show their true colors until you've met in person and even with that not for some time. C) People be crazy. Have you ever met someone you met online or are you just making this up Met literally dozens. |
| And for those suggesting I'm way off base.. how many people have you met from online? I've done it dating, socially, and part of a job (have to attend events in an active online community to promote stuff). People are NEVER what you think they'll be. |
aloricg said: And for those suggesting I'm way off base.. how many people have you met from online? I've done it dating, socially, and part of a job (have to attend events in an active online community to promote stuff). People are NEVER what you think they'll be. That's precisely why your opinion is wrong about them. |
[i]"Yet each man kills the thing he loves, [/i]By each let this be heard, Some do it with a bitter look, Some with a flattering word, The coward does it with a kiss, The brave man with a sword!'' ~Oscar |
| So you've struck out online and now look at it cynically? Tell me would it make sense if I said "man I hate real life socializing because it wasn't what I thought it was". No. People would say that's stupid and that I should just keep trying. Correct? I've met around 10 or so people. I plan on having a party with a group of very close online friends in about a year. They are on par with friends I've met through irl interactions and greetings. And to rally your point against you. If people are going to lie to you. They're going to lie regardless of if it's online or offline meetings. People who are never who they seem are people who are liars. And liars are present in all forms of mediums. That is not online exclusive. |
| I just can't.. I white girl can't.. I never said the result was always bad, just that people aren't what you think they're going to be. And you think i've "given up" or something. LOL. Reading comprehension kids, basic boom-boom reading comprehension. |
| I do, yes. The person on the other side of that screen is sinew, blood and has a soul so they are just as important to me as if I knew them locally. I try to be there for people I care about when they're at their worst because anyone can call themselves a friend at the best of times, it's the ones who stick around to give you a helping hand when you're on your knees that are true friends. Some people shrug me off but I won't chew them out for it. I'm boring, yes, but I'm always there for people who need it. |
| "Dakimakura aren't meant for fucking." -Moog, January 2015 When a site's moderators warn you for condemning a troll, you know their moderators need to be changed out. |
| Online friends. but only just a handful of em. ('ω')三( ε: )三(.ω.)三( :3 ) |
aloricg said: I just can't.. I white girl can't.. I never said the result was always bad, just that people aren't what you think they're going to be. And you think i've "given up" or something. LOL. Reading comprehension kids, basic boom-boom reading comprehension. All your points have only been implied to be negative traits, which you base off your "experience" in the subject. You even stated that "Date will never be the person they seem to be online. This is just how it works. Whatever you assume, no matter how much you talk, they're different in person." which is a blanket statement to everything based on your "bad" experiences. Ergo, you have a cynical view. Saying "it isn't what you think it is" applies to everything. Literally every social interaction ever. You're trying to discern them into two categories, of online and offline, when they are mutual in the same cord of people are dicks. People can be a lying dick whether online or offline. You can try and pull the reading comprehension card. But that won't save you from having a cynical opinion. |
| Out of the large amount of people I've come to associate with online over the past few years only one maybe two would I consider myself as close to as anyone I know face to face but these are friendships forged over a decade of daily contact and after various conflicts... I have met few different people in person after hanging out online and some of them have been pretty cool but I've also met a few who were straight up freaky and made me regret the decision to meet from the get go. So I guess, while meeting them for the first time will probably change your initial ideal image of them that isn't necessarily a bad thing and sometimes what you meet up front is just a nervous version of the person you do know. All in all, yeah, I think it's legit to have friends you've never met face to face. It's the relationship that you have with said person that makes the friendship, I mean I have RL friends who I hardly ever see but that doesn't diminish the friendship. |
Puppet-kunMar 4, 2015 11:44 PM
 |
TheRealNico said: aloricg said: I just can't.. I white girl can't.. I never said the result was always bad, just that people aren't what you think they're going to be. And you think i've "given up" or something. LOL. Reading comprehension kids, basic boom-boom reading comprehension. Maybe you're the reason why people don't come to you? No one really likes cynical/dick type people regardless online/offline so I don't blame them for backing off on you. Never said anything like that.. Wow, project much..? |
| The fact that you've gone to great lengths to create intricate obsessive fantasies about me and my life is.. troubling. |
| Or, creative~ |
|
NomadShiki said: Or, creative~ If I owned a rabbit, i'd fear for its demise in a pot. |
aloricg said: We don't have that here, sorry. :/Reading comprehension kids, basic boom-boom reading comprehension. |
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
| I'm probably gonna be that guy who makes a post that's way too long. I value IRL friendships more, but if I'm being honest, I don't think anyone has ever known me as well as some of my online friends. The barrier of sitting behind a computer screen allows you to reveal more of yourself than you normally would in person (or for me anyways). Of course I should qualify this by saying that most of my closest online friends were people I'd sit in Ventrilo servers with all the time, so we actually "spoke" as opposed to typing. I first got involved in online communities in the late 90's and have some online friends that I've known for almost as long. I used to frequent Counter-Strike servers where there'd be literally 100+ people who were regular players on that particular server and I more or less knew them all. It was like you could always hop on and hang out with people you know, which definitely has value. I even have two online friends who met through a CS team that I started and they've now been living together for something like 8 years. I had a group of guys who were my CS team that would hang out in a ventrilo server pretty much anytime we were at home, whether we were playing games or not. We'd just sit there and hang out while we surfed the web or whatever, even after we stopped playing as a team. It really wasn't much different from sitting on the couch watching TV with my roommate. After years and years of this, you come to value those relationships pretty highly. One of my friends even popped into the voice chat server saying "yeah, so I bought this ring earlier today... am I crazy if I'm thinking about proposing?" E-friends gave him the push and encouragement to get out there and do it, which gives you warm fuzzies if you think about it, having known someone through HS, college, into the real world, parenthood and beyond. Still never met them in person, but it doesn't discount the friendship. It's kind of funny, we don't play games together at all anymore, but we still talk about serious or important IRL issues when they come up. Of course the more popular internet communities become, the more crap you have to wade through to find quality people to get to know. Trolls everywhere. |
| I'm going to point out that I believe, in general, hetero men have tenuous (at best) relationships with other men. Often what they'd call "friendship" i'd barely recognize as an acquaintance. |
aloricg said: That's why all the loners on MAL try to befriend each other so they can pretend that everyone are their hot female anime avys instead.I'm going to point out that I believe, in general, hetero men have tenuous (at best) relationships with other men. Often what they'd call "friendship" i'd barely recognize as an acquaintance. |
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
Korrvo said: aloricg said: That's why all the loners on MAL try to befriend each other so they can pretend that everyone are their hot female anime avys instead.I'm going to point out that I believe, in general, hetero men have tenuous (at best) relationships with other men. Often what they'd call "friendship" i'd barely recognize as an acquaintance. Oi hello |
[i]"Yet each man kills the thing he loves, [/i]By each let this be heard, Some do it with a bitter look, Some with a flattering word, The coward does it with a kiss, The brave man with a sword!'' ~Oscar |
Korrvo said: aloricg said: That's why all the loners on MAL try to befriend each other so they can pretend that everyone are their hot female anime avys instead.I'm going to point out that I believe, in general, hetero men have tenuous (at best) relationships with other men. Often what they'd call "friendship" i'd barely recognize as an acquaintance. Fuyukai desu. |
geniobastardo said: or hot yaoi avys?Korrvo said: That's why all the loners on MAL try to befriend each other so they can pretend that everyone are their hot female anime avys instead. Oi hello |
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
bigguy37 said: story Spending time with people over voice chat is just as effective as sitting in front of someone face to face. Being social is no longer hinged on face to face meetings. We're in a new age. Tradition is no longer applied because we're more connected then we have ever before. Plus old school CS. I approve. |
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