Around the the 37th year of the Meiji Era (1904), in the midst of the Russo-Japanese war, the small Japanese army, in need of assistance, uses its special flying (thanks to a benevolent demon) ship, the Amanohara, to attack Russia's major base at Port Arthur (Lushun).
Umakai Shintaro, a Russian diplomat originally from Japan, defects and goes to Sapporo to teach at a girls academy. However, that girls academy is not typical—it is on board the Amanohara, and the five girls Shintaro teaches are known as the Raimu Unit—girls with the ability to summon powerful beings to fight for them. Shintaro eventually becomes their teacher and general in battle, and so the six embark on a weird and excessively erotic journey, as Shintaro helps the girls overcome their weaknesses, become stronger for the final stand at Lushun, and also understand the motives of the "Russian Spiritual Corps" that assist the opponent, which, unfortunately, has one member whom Shintaro knew well...
Lime Colored War Tales is what you would end up with if Strike Witches was made by a group of teenaged boys. It is the embodiment of a pure harem ecchi anime, but not in a good way.
Though this is a horrible show, I will admit that I found the characters to be endearing and interesting and that I enjoyed their interactions (at least, in the comedy scenes) and the histories given for each of the characters. With such a terrible plot, it's a good thing that much of the show focuses on the characters and their pasts, because I found each of the girls
in the LIME unit to be likable by the end. So if I like the characters, why would I hate the show so much?
The first thing to point out is political but I still find it uncomfortable. The story of LCWT takes place during the Russian-Japanese war that started shortly after the turn of the 20th century. Of course, the events that take place in LCWT have nothing to do with reality, but I still find it unsettling that the heroines are fighting in a war that Japan initiated (in real life) with a _sneak attack_ against a Russian harbor city. (That is, launching an attack days before a formal declaration of war.) And the LIME unit in LCWT is taking "the fight" to a Russian fortress. I'm not suggesting this show is politically motivated; the commander of the LIME unit is fighting to end the war and for peace, but it's still about invading Russia.
Okay, most of you probably don't care about stuff like that. What else makes this show bad? This is a harem show that has a male protagonist, who is unlikeable at best, who becomes the target of the affection of every girl around him. This is par for the course for harem shows, but the girls don't just have crushes on him-- no, _every single person on the ship with two X chromosomes_ inexplicably and desperately wants his man meat, from nearly the moment they meet him. His students, the female doctor, the female demon, even the triplets who are too young to ride the spinning cups at Disney World. I enjoy ecchi romantic comedies, but there's no _romance_ in this show. It's only romantic if you have the same sense of romance as an unfixed dog.
Perhaps it's plot holes or unexplained circumstances that do it for you? Well, this is a show about going to war, so of course there are battles. The battles are performed using spiritual warriors summoned by the girls, on both the Japanese side and the Russian side. Yes, the Russians have their own spiritual beings, and their female soldiers all dress like they work the red light district. And for some reason, they can _fly_. Yes, all of the Russian soldiers in this show can _fly_. How?
Additionally, the Russians can use magic. This isn't too odd since the shinto girl, Kinu, can cast curses and often uses Japanese voodoo dolls throughout the show for various things. But here's what they don't explain. On the Japanese ship, there is a demon in the form of a young girl who protects the ship and enables it to fly. Okay, fair enough, it's Japan. But the Russian commander is able to use magic _that the demon can't discern_. She's a a supernatural being, but convienently useless most of the time. And yes, she wants the protagonist's man meat too.
The crime in this show is that it does have some good points. As I said, I enjoyed the character development and felt that was better than average for a half-season harem ecchi comedy. But it also has some decent, emotional, well-conceived (if not well-written) dramatic scenes. The comedy scenes are also quite funny and the interactions between the girls are great. But I don't think it's worth sitting through the rest of the show to see.
Oh, the protagonist does have one special power. If he sleeps together with a girl, she'll feel better. ... ... ...
Cheesiest anime ever, i don't even know how i watched all 13 episodes without quitting, i guess the fact i was sleepy helped alot.
Here's my scoring + related comments for this masterpiece:
Story - 4
Ok so uh... I think i already covered this part, cheesy plot is cheesy. Most of the time what you see makes no sense unless its story covering the background of a character. Which might make some sense, the afterwards effect of the background story will leave you a "lolwut" taste in your mouth. Because it is that cheesy, really.
Art - 5
I highly dislike the artwork from these old animes, i
guess mostly because they are outdated, reminds me of trigun, except trigun was awesome.
Sound - 4
Sound effects, like... honestly. What the hell. Overused sound effects for everything, some sound effects aren't even related to what is currently happening like the sound of steel hitting the floor when throw and the sea, then all of a sudden you hear a splash sound like as if it was thrown at the sea, which is confusing.
Character - 4
I think this is the only (somehow) positive side from this anime, they aren't entirelly bad but neither are they entirelly good.
Enjoyment - 2
The only enjoyment i had throughout this anime where the many random "lolwut" moments, and the fact that once i finished all 13 episodes, there was a small clip confirming the continuation of the anime. Which then i googled to make sure if there was a 2nd season, to which i found out to be the truth, i started laughing alot for a good 2-3 minutes. Which is the reason why i'm even writting this review
Anyways, time to watch season 2 (LOLQUE?) of this wonderful one of a kind master piece. I hope i can last another 13 episodes of this insanity.
I'll write another review for the 2nd season in its proper page, lets see if i can make it there today(03/03/2016). If you see no reviews from me there, i must likely went insane on my way there. Woohoo, i'm so hyped!