Reviews

Jan 6, 2025
FunnyFunny
One of the biggest inspirations for Hellsing, cited by the mangaka, is Trigun—which can be seen clearly in how Alucard's design reflects that of Vash the Stampede. This puzzles me, because Trigun is about how we should always strive for peace in spite of how difficult it is, and Hellsing is about how cool it is to rip people in half and watch them bleed.

Seriously, that's what the characters in Hellsing spend 80% of the show doing. There is no downtime. You never get a break from the relentless blood and gore. Now, to be fair, I'm not the biggest fan of action scenes, but I also really like gore in anime, so it's saying something that I got bored by how much of it there was. In simple terms, it felt excessive and gratuitous. Gore is most effective if you take the time to build up to it, getting to know the characters it happens to in great detail first. With Hellsing it just feels pointlessly edgy for the sake of it, and I can hardly care about the gore because I didn't get enough time to know the characters it was happening to.

This is a shame, because I think the characters could be very interesting. Alucard is badass and mysterious (if overpowered), Seras is cute and endearing (although I...hate the way her chest is drawn), and Integra is the coolest woman to ever exist (though I may be blinded by my massive crush on her). Unfortunately we barely get any time with them because most of the series is just gory action scenes.

Anyways, it's not just the gore that's gratuitous. Hellsing also features a fair bit of sexual violence that adds nothing to the story. Thankfully there's nowhere near as much rape as there is gore, but it could legitimately be removed without consequence. Even moreso than the gore it feels like it is only present just to be vulgar and explicit. And I'm not here with a torch and pitchfork claiming it's immoral to indulge in blood and rape in media just because you like to be fucked up and edgy, but I am saying it's boring. Not only is it tactless, but it just isn't interesting.

Furthermore, the villains of this show are the Nazis, and the funny thing about that is it's very hard to do wrong. Everyone knows Nazis are evil so they make for a very cut and dry villain that is hard to mess up. Yet, somehow, Hellsing managed to screw it up at every single possible opportunity.

Nazis were real. They killed twelve million people in a eugenic attempt to wipe out minorities. All of those people were brutalized and had their lives cut short. And in Hellsing, one of the main antagonists is a Nazi catboy who does silly catboy things and is leered at by the camera. Of course.

Mixing the supernatural with the Nazis is, in my opinion, not really the way to go. Nazis are real and vampires are not. However Hellsing is almost impressive with how it flagrantly disregards how real of a threat the Nazis were with how it presents them here like cartoon supervillains consisting of eccentric supernatural creatures. Like sexy catboys. Whatever man.

All in all, it's just ten hours of sexed up gore, rape, and silly Nazis that doesn't use any of those factors to say anything interesting and feels as though it were written by a middle schooler in an attempt to write a edgier story than their friend. I guess what I mean is I just don't see the point to any of it.
Reviewer’s Rating: 5
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