PoruMairu said:I have lived on this earth for 5 decades, so i will tell you what works for me.
I have had plenty of heart aches and bad things in my life as well, and I was suicidal at it's worst, but I am great now, better than ever.
I went through sexual abuse as a child by both older siblings, my mother told me when I was 6 that she never wanted to see me again, and she left the family. I was dealing drugs and living in share houses at 16. I married someone with personality disorder and suffered 10 years of physical and psychological violence.
Shit happens in life to many many people, and yes it does hurt.
What has helped me the most is negation, particularly negation of the ego.
For example I used to suffer severe lonliness. It was crushing, made me anxious, and I used to do damaging things to myself to avoid or dull it, like drinking, smoking, sex and any other distraction.
But with negation, I am very clam, and I can arrest things quickly.
For example: I am lonely. I feel bad. I must do something to control it or improve my situation.
Think of how absurd that is! I am lonely, like there is one who is observing and one who is observerved. There is the I that sees the loneliness, and another who is feeling the loneliness. But it is the same I in both situations. It is absurd to think that the one who is lonely can fix the one who is lonely. If it was so then I wouldn't be lonely!
Once I realise that I am the lonely one, and nothing can be done about it by another fragment of my ego, I was able to sit with it.
Once you can sit with it, and just observe it without any judgement, without any thought, just observe the loneliness in all it's ways, just watching without thinking, then suddenly a peace comes over you, and you realise it is mostly your own mind playing a trick on it's own self.
I went from crushing loneliness to barely ever feeling it.
It is difficult to start it, but once you get it, and apply it, it works with a whole host of issues.
The one who explains it well is Krishnamurti. He has a YT channel - he is past on now, but his videos are there on his official channell.
You really only need to listen to a couple of his vids as they just repeat themselves over, but if you can get it, it may help you immensly.
Best wishes.