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I will now present my thesis on why Kyaru is best girl (slight spoilers).

Have you ever tried to pick up a stray cat before? They will claw your face out and leave you bleeding on the side of the road. However, when given a proper home, affection and attention, a stray cat can undergo a glorious transformation and become a cute cat who loves belly rubs and headpats. They will never leave your side, constantly purring and wanting to return the same affection and attention that you show them.

Kyaru just needs a good company. The gourmet guild is a perfect environment for her to grow ... and thrive. Look at how her character developed when she had a taste of what it's like to have a decent family with Peco, Kokkoro and Yuuki.

Look at how sad she looks every time she reminds herself of her 'mission.' She understands more than anyone else that deceiving and betraying is a bad thing. Kyaru knows that she isn't a good person. She's never considered herself as a 'good person' or even a decent daughter. Her whole grey character is meant to contrast our favourite bubbly cast of Pecorine, Kokkoro and Yuuki.

Kyaru's abusive, toxic and broken relationship with her biological family has skewed her ability to have normal, caring relationships. That's part of the reason why she is so devoted to Kaiser. Even though her relationship with Kaiser is more on a "master and subordinate" level, Kaiser manipulates Kyaru by praising her for little things which gives her a sense of fleeting self affirmation. Kyaru feels like even someone like her can achieve something - that she can feel valued and useful by someone even if it is sourced from a toxic environment.

Deep down, Kyaru understands that Kaiser isn't a good person either. That's a personal connection that she shares with Kaiser. Kyaru is drawn to this familiar environment because for as long as she can remember, she has always been surrounded by selfish, authoritative and abusive figures. Compared to her abusive domestic life at home, Kaiser offers Kyaru a much more fortunate and enticing 'safe space.'

So what happens when you get a broken person to suddenly share good food, experience life, and have fun without fear of judgement or expectations with a group of likeable people that one might call "family"?

Disconnection.

This kind of unfamiliar, abnormal affection and familial environment is exactly the sort of thing that Kyaru was craving for her whole life. However, Kyaru is plagued by the fact that she doesn't consider herself a good person. She knows deep within her soul that she does not deserve this kind of normal love. Her whole upbringing and broken personality manifested in the tragic idea that love can only be earned. Perhaps Kyaru takes pride in finding her self-worth in earning that love since she has been preconditioned from an early stage of her life.

The whole contrast between her "I want to be alone, don't talk to me!" tsundere cat persona versus her desire for genuine affection is a constant theme throughout her character development. It is heart-breaking to see the unhealthy ways Kyaru deals with being torn apart by this vicious cycle of seeking affirmation, self-worth and desire for companionship. Both the Gourmet Guild and us viewers can obviously see Kyaru coping with this dilemma by distancing herself from the group. Whenever she gets lost in the rare moment of genuine joy from experiencing adventuring, good foods and life with the trio, she suddenly cuts herself from that fun and reminds herself of her insignificant self-worth in order to fulfil her duty of betrayal.

"Do I really deserve to be with these people?"

Kyaru knows she isn't a good person.

Kyaru knows she doesn't deserve to have fun.

Kyaru hasn't done anything to earn affection from Pecorine, Kokkoro and Yuuki. If anything, Kyaru was prepared to receive backlash,
and punishment from the trio once they learn of her deceit and betrayal.

Kyaru hides behind her 'mission' almost like an excuse to stop herself from having fun and getting too close to the trio. Her mission is exactly like a mask that she wears daily to protect herself and the trio, similar to how she wears a mask with her ascended princess form.

Ultimately, Kyaru is forced into a corner. She can't continue two separate lives at once. She is being torn apart by this constant internal conflict. Does she choose the sickeningly sweet, intimate family environment that Gourmet Guild offers or the familiar toxic environment that she's always been used to with Kaiser?

Of course Kyaru wants to live with the Gourmet Guild. But she bottles her true feelings. Her ingrained, unhealthy perception of her low self-worth means she believes that she doesn't deserve to live in the same house. She doesn't want to taint their perfect family bubble.

She feels out of place.

Disconnected.

Trapped in this internal conflict, Kyaru tragically falls back onto what she's always been familiar with - the toxic environment where she has to pridefully fight to earn her own value, self-worth and self-affirmation through fulfulling her duty and meeting Kaiser's expectations.

In summary, please give Kyaru lots of headpats. Tell her it's okay. You did many mistakes, but that's okay. Just like me and any other human being on the planet, people make mistakes. While what you did was definitely wrong, it is ultimately up to Pecorine, Kokkoro and Yuuki to decide to forgive you. Whether you choose to forgive or not forgive yourself for the wrongs you've done, remember that there's always a place in Gourmet Guild for you.

That is your true home.

Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk.

キャル、俺たち結婚しよう~