emperortopaz's Blog

May 24th, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-ninety-fifth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone!

: Good to see you're welcoming them back. They should be thanked for returning after last week's blog.

: Oh? But it was my blog last time. You really think that it was that awful?

: The fans did speak.

That was just an unfortunate misunderstanding. But I do still apologize for my actions last time.

: Stop apologizing, even if you are a horrible pig. You should be more free with your love and accept that you're a horrible person.

Nonsense! I'll try my best to be as good as I can! Though sometimes things are hard.

: Hopefully everyone understands that you're an idiot sometimes.

I'm sure that they do. They've read this far, at least. They should know by now that I'm a terrible writer.

: Don't say such cruel things about yourself.

: No no, say such things! You're awful and deserve eternal punishment. Esdeath and I will even do just that for you.

: That's right. Just quit doing your blogs and we'll keep you pleased forever. I'm sure your fans won't mind that either.

There's no way that you two are going to seduce me out of this.

: They already tried, and failed, last week.

: It's not my fault I'm so tenacious.

And besides, weren't you two going to challenge me in a capture the flag battle or something similar?

: Oh yes, I had forgotten.

*Frolaytia climbs up the crab-like mecha and sticks the flag in a holder.*

: There. Now it will be safe.

: Not so fast. Topaz still has to summon the girl he's choosing to ally with this week. Go ahead, I'll allow you this one opportunity.

Fine then... Summoning powers-ACTIVATE!

*Topaz creates a summon circle around himself.*

: Wow, it's been a while since we've shown the summoning on camera. Then again it's been a while since Topaz needed to summon the girl of the week.

*A young blonde girl is summoned.*

: Hawawa... What am I doing here?

: Shhh, we can't have you using that word. It's a swear in these parts.

Now now, Riri. She said “Hawawa”, not the worse word “T*wawa”.

: I suppose not, I apologize for this.

: I-I understand I think. But why did you summon me? KYAAAH!

What's wrong?

*Shuri cowers cutely and points to the giant machine.*

: What is that thing?

That? That's a mecha. We need your help to defeat it.

: I'm not strong enough to do anything...

That's alright. It's a battle and we need someone good at tactics.

: And not just the Final Fantasy sort either!

Will you help us, Shuri?

: I suppose that I can-wait, Shuri? Hawawa, how did you know my name?

I do suppose that your true name is “Shokatsuryou” or “Koumei”, but I decided to use “Shuri” just in case.

: At least call me “Koumei”!

Fine, I suppose. But I have another request to make.

*Topaz leans in on the short loli Koumei. She flusters in an adorable fashion.*

: A-are you sure that I'm the best one for this? There's many other more voluptuous girls around t-that could take part.

No, Koumei. You're the only one who can fulfill this need of mine.

: Hawawa... Well, since you're so insistent I-I can't really refuse...

That's a pleasure to hear. Don't worry, I'll be gentle. Because I want to say that...



*Koumei looks up, strangely confused.*

: E-eehh? You're not going to be playing with me sexually?

No. Where did you get an idea like that?

: Your dialogue was awful and confusing, Topaz. That's why the sweet innocent girl thought the worst.

: W-wait... I've heard that name before. Where was it again?

: Could it be that you've heard about his blogs?

: I'm not sure what a “blog” is, but that does sound oddly familiar...

: You might have heard it from Kan'u and the other girls he talked about.

: Ah, perhaps. So does that mean that you're going to talk about me next?

That I am.

: Then I apologize for my poor scores in advance...

Nonsense. You might get better than you'd expect.

: Especially now that Topaz is somewhat competent.

: Competent nothing. He's just lucky. Now, start the last pathetic blog you'll ever do!

With pleasure, though I doubt that it will be the last!

Head
Hair: Koumei does have some weaknesses here. She does have blonde hair, which doesn't bother me all too much (though I do prefer darker hair, like with Kan'u). She also has a short bob cut, with the sides barely reaching her shoulders. They are a bit longer in front, with a curve in the back. Koumei also has fairly simple spiked bangs and looks to have a long middle bang as well (mostly in the anime at least). I do like the straight cut, but Koumei still doesn't do too well here even if she is very cute and the short hair fits her. She does dream having longer hair in at least one bonus image, with hair past her waist or so. It makes her look a little older, even if she's not judging by the male protagonist beside her. I will say that her cute beret does help, as do the long ribbons that go past her hips.
Grade: B

Eyes: Koumei does alright here. She does have tarame eyes, which aren't my favorite but they do suit her soft art style and personality. Her eyes are also red, or perhaps purple in the VN (it's hard to tell, and I certainly know I'm not one to judge colors). Purple would have been preferred, but Koumei having red eyes doesn't hurt too much as it goes well with her somewhat dark clothing. I will say though, Koumei has a very moe look to her. She has a very sweet and lovely innocent look, perhaps being based on the Key works of KyoAni. The art style is really good, suiting my tastes well. It may be the art style, but Koumei does look like she has slightly-large pupils (though that may just be due to the size of her eye). Nothing wrong with that, of course. Overall, with a cute shape and pretty color Koumei does really well (even if I prefer the cooler-looking tsurime). I'm not sure if she wears it in the anime or not, but in the visual novel she does wear Chōun-er, “Butterfly Kamen”'s butterfly mask. While not really glasses, it's more of a masquerade mask, it is the closest she has to wearing glasses that I can remember.
Grade: B

Face: Koumei is extremely cute, like most of the girls in her show. It's a fairly simple art style, but I enjoy this look. She has a small dot nose which is always a plus, and in general she's really cute. Koumei's cheeks look really soft, and her face is framed well by her hair. Not as well as if she had a hime cut, but still. I'll also add that she has a lot of cute facial expressions and gets flustered quite a bit. She's known to go into “Hawawa” mode when she's flustered, with her hands near her face which, while she may not have created, may be the base for that very moe pose. Overall Koumei does well here, with a soft art style and gentle facial expressions, as well as cute moments of being flustered.
Grade: A

HAFFAAARRRGGGHH!

*Esdeath hits Topaz in the face with a sucker punch. Her hand even seems icy and he goes flopping against the ground. He takes 25 damage.*

: What was that for?

: I'm a villain.

: I know, but most of them at least have a good reason for slugging Topaz.

It's alright. She didn't do too much damage.

: And whose to say that I don't have a reason? Topaz just said that he likes the face of this... useless young girl over my dommy face! But more than that, were we not supposed to battle?

So it's a team battle disguised as a capture the flag then? I should have expected you to have something like this up your sleeve.

: But it's not like we've agreed to the starting time, or anything else! You're attacking prematurely!

: A true victor doesn't play by the rules! Besides, I said that the battle would begin this week. I didn't give an exact time. It doesn't help that just sitting here listening to Topaz gab on was getting annoying.

But my articles are the most interesting part.

: Nonsense. Your fans want more battles and excitement. And that's what Ol' Ironclaw and I will provide.

*The crab-like mecha starts to slam its oversized claw down.*

: Wait, when did she learn to pilot that thing?

Now's not the time to think of that!

: Hawawa... Lindy! Do it now!

: ON IT!

*With quick speed Lindy in a mecha musume outfit, looking like a humanoid mecha. She punches the claw with incredible magical and mechanical force.*

: Don't think that you will be able to defeat us that easily!

: Heh, look at your cute little humanoid gun-whatever. With your tiny frame you'll never be able to defeat this mecha!

: You again underestimate the power that a human can provide!

: Still less than a Saiyan though...

: HOO-RAH!

*Lindy flips the crab over with a judo-like move. Fortunately Shuri, Riri, and Topaz evade the impending crash.*

Great! Now attack its weak spot for massive damage!

: Like I'll allow you to do that, Topaz!

*With that Esdeath creates a wall of ice between him and the others. Esdeath is on his side though trapping the two together.*

Grrr. How dare you separate me from the others!

: That's right. There's no way you'll be able to get advice from the others like this. I have thought of every-

*CRASH! Esdeath is in mid-sentence as the crab-like mecha crashes through the wall. It soon gets on its feet as Lindy crawls through the ice hole. She makes a flying leap, flipping though the air as the crab fires electrical blasts at her. Lindy ends up landing foot-first on it, cracking some of its shell.*

: Huh.

You know, I do appreciate the idea of us battling apart. But this is no place to do it. Let's go on top of the valley.

: You're only delaying your doom, but I have been looking forward to a solo battle against you. I shall allow it.

Good to hear.

*Esdeath easily flips and leaps up the edges of the cliff face. Topaz tries but falls.*

This is more difficult than I expected. How about I talk about Koumei a little more to past the time...

Body
Build: By all means Koumei has a very petite, loli build. She's very slender and looks like a younger girl than her age may imply. Sadly Koihime Musou does not have measurements, except for Kan'u (as she was in the Queen's Gate spinoff). Thus, do not be angry when I say that Koumei is about chest-level to Kan'u. Kan'u is 157 cm, but I'm terrible at estimates so take that as you will. Sizes aside Koumei is pretty good, even if she's slender. She does have a nice if somewhat slender ass (especially compared to the older girls) that she shows off not only in the series but in the official images and visual novel as well. There's even a nice CG image of her on top of her friend Houtou and showing off both her ass and even her anus! Her ass looks nice and round, but the anime she doesn't seem quite as assy, which is unfortunate. I'm unsure about Koumei's legs as well; they seem to be narrow in the anime but official art says otherwise so I can't be sure. Still, she does have a fairly short, slender body which doesn't due too well here.
Grade: B-

Chest: Fortunately for her small size Koumei is perfectly flat. It fits with her build and looks really good. She even shows off as much as any other girl, and although you might need the DVDs to see past the steam or chibi-based censorship she does have fairly small nipples. Koumei is a little jealous of the other girls in the VA, but that's not just about this area either and she works hard to still satisfy the male protagonist. So rather than actually being envious for long and having bad thoughts she instead works hard and tries to use her own charms and body to her advantage. I'm not sure about her feelings in the anime, it's been a long time since I've seen it, but I don't remember her being too envious either. Overall Koumei shows off and is flat, which is perfectly fine.
Grade: B+

Clothes: Koumei has a surprising wardrobe, at least in other media. In the main series she tends to stick with one outfit, which consists of a white dress with black underskirt, a red jacket with puffy shoulders (though in the VN it seems more of a brown color), and white thighhighs which may or may not have garters. She also wears bells around her collar and a beret as mentioned before. It's not a bad outfit, kinda cute actually, but it is a sorta strange one that I can't completely understand the purpose of. Oh, and despite being in ancient China Koumei wears panties and perhaps a bra, like most of the characters in the series. Koumei also wears a school uniform in the various OVAs, which is fairly similar to her usual outfit (including the beret). The white top is a shirt rather than connected as one piece, her skirt is red with side-ribbons, and she has a yellow ribbon around her collar instead of bells. That said, that's not the only outfits Koumei has. She also has a maid outfit, a sukumizu, a cute dress while playing the harp, a yukata, a nice green Chinese dress, and possibly more that I can't remember. Overall while her normal outfit isn't exactly impressive I still find her bonus ones quite attractive.
Grade: B+

*Topaz finally makes it to the top of the cliffs, where Esdeath waits.*

: Finally. I thought that you would never make it.

Huff.. huff.. I'm stronger than I look!

: Doesn't seem like much stronger. But now that you have arrived I shall start the battle!

*Topaz stands up and gets in a battle pose.*

Bring me your worst!

*Esdeath charges Topaz, hitting him a with a flurry of punches and kicks. He avoids most, but does take a combined 30 damage. However, Riri flies up to where they're fighting.*

: Topaz!

Don't worry, I'm alright!

: Don't you have your own fight to take care of?

: Lindy has it under control, I think.

*The camera pans to Lindy, still in her magical mech suit kicking the crud out of the crab mech.*

: Oof argh! Stop beating this up! It's surprisingly fragile for a crab, and I'm not too experienced as a pilot either. I'm bouncing around in here!

: Perhaps if you didn't have such a top-heavy body you'd be more stable!

: It's not top-heavy, Ol' Ironclaw's legs are spread wide enough that-wait, ah hah hah. I understand your insult. But don't think that your scrawny humanoid robot body can withstand THIS!

*The crab mecha grabs Lindy by the leg and flings her towards Koumei. The tactician loli ducks so that she's not hit, but Lindy still impacts the cliffside.*

: Healing medicine!

*Koumei sprinkles powder on Lindy, who gets up.*

: You're alright, right?

: Oww, seems that the mecha can hit pretty hard. Harder than I was expecting.

: Then the point is not to get hit!

: Our master tactician, folks. A-hem, sorry, some sarcasm got stuck in my throat.

: I know that it's obvious, but what I mean is that you can attack it from behind. You're agile enough so *whisper whisper*

: Ah yes, great plan!

*Ironclaw soon comes up to the two.*

: Wah hah hah, no plan you two can match the power of this mech!

: Do not underestimate the power of magical girls, especially heroic ones!

Frolatyia: Ufufu, calling yourself a “girl”?

: MATURE-WOMEN-ARE-CUTE-AS-WELL-PUUNNCCHH!

*Lindy punches the mecha so hard it gets pushed back, with a huge dent in the hull. It quickly recovers, shaking it off.*

: See? I told you that Koumei and Lindy have that covered.

: Well then, I'd better find something more for you to do.

*Esdeath creates various ice humanoid soldiers, bearing spears.*

Look at what you did...

: Great, more work. (Great, now I sound like Topaz.)

: Face her, my subjects!

*The soldiers attack freely, charging at Ririchiyo. However, individually they're so weak that she breaks them in a single slice. Pieces of ice crash upon the ground.*

Hah, looks like your attack is useless!

*The ice melts quickly, creating a pool of water. The soldiers then reform.*

: What were you saying again?

: Don't worry about me. These numbers are meaningless!

That's right. And if I can take down Esdeath they should disappear!

: Take me out? Are you- UGH!

*Topaz quickly went into his demon form and slams into Esdeath, sending her flying. He then drops her into the ground so hard a hole appears. The soldiers Ririchiyo was fighting melt into ice.*

: Looks like she fell quite deep.

Indeed. Hopefully I have time to finish my blog now.

Mind
Personality: Koumei is a very lovely girl that suits me really well. She's shy and reserved most of the time, going into the “Hawawa mode” when flustered. That said she does have an earnest side to her, and when it comes up she can be an alright fighter. She just doesn't usually fight, including in the anime. In the games Koumei's main ability is to negate the opponent's special ability when both are used in the same round, making it useful but occasionally useless if you pick the wrong turn. Koumei is also based on Zhuge Liang, a famous tactician from Romance of the Three Kingdoms (which Koihime Musou in general is based on). As such she's a skilled tactician and has a goal to protect the weak. She's very smart, even when it comes to sexual things, and is a diligent worker. Koumei also trained with a cute loli with a witch hat and they learned the ways of medicine. Some weaknesses Koumei has include her low fighting power, her “hawawa” studder, and it seems that in the manga if she talks too quickly she bites her tongue cutely (I'm not sure if this is in any sort of media but I noticed it mentioned while researching her). That said her equipment is a fan rather than an actual weapon, though I'm not sure if it has a small amount of wind powers or not. Koumei is voiced by Erika Narumi, who gives her a cute and fitting voice. It might be a little high pitched, but not in any bothersome way and I like her gentle and I imagine proper speech patterns. Koumei is mildly popular, being one of the main heroines of the series though there are a great many girls as well. That said, I probably should mention why I chose to talk about Koumei over another more “adult” girl. It should be obvious, but I like Koumei. While I was playing the game (a long time ago) it's possible to go after two main girls and I think about five secondary girls as you go through the series. There were only three options for main girls though: Kan'u, Koumei, and Rinrin. Due to those choices I decided to go after Koumei first and then Rinrin in a second playthrough (which obviously never happened) so while I never actually finished it I did see a lot more of Koumei than most of the other characters. And she's really cute! She seems to get jealous in the games and feels inferior, but as it goes on being with the male protagonist seems to make her happier. So overall while Koumei isn't incredibly strong (both physically and personality-wise) she does well for me. And she's quite cute, of course!
Grade: B

Libido: This is likely Koumei's best area. She's surprisingly perverse, even if the anime doesn't show it too much at first. She has a high amount of knowledge of sexual acts due to her studies of adult books (a hobby she has with a friend). She also has a perverse mind, though is cutely embarrassed by it. Koumei realizes that, while her body may not be as endowed as the bigger girls, she can make it up in knowledge. As said before Koumei is from an eroge, and thus has a lot of naughty scenes. I can't say for all of them, but I have seen her partake in riding vaginal, being held in a sort of lap-riding pose with her legs up, and fellatio. She's also a virgin, but between that meaning blood and dumb purity bias that's little more than something I have to mention to be complete rather than something I approve of. There may be more in games that I don't know about (I just did a quick check and there's three games, plus fan discs but I don't know if they count as being official) but Koumei still does good here.
Grade: A-

Age: It is unknown how old Koumei is. She does look really young, but looks can be deceiving. I'll also add that she is in an eroge, and as a result she must be over 18 because that is a rule. That rule isn't necessary for the anime version, but overall I expect she might secretly do well there too. I can't be sure though.
Grade: B+

Total Grades: 79
Average score: 8.8
Final Grade: B+

And that's the blog for this week. What do you think, Koumei?

: Hawawa~ I'm surprised by how well I did!

: I'm surprised that you could hear him over the sound of that battle.

*The camera moves over to Frolaytia and Lindy still in battle.*

: Why won't you just give UP?

*The magical mother gives the crab mecha an uppercut, sending it flying and breaking the front of the mecha.*

: Great job, now grab the flag. That's how we'll win!

That was surprisingly easy. I didn't even need to bring out our secret weapon.

: Secret weapon?

As I was finishing up I summoned a girl for next week and told her to hide.

: So THAT is your plan then.

*Esdeath comes out of the hole glowing with a blue flame-like aura.*

W-what? You should have been unconscious!

: My tenacity is one of my strong points!

: Like in the manga. That battle took way too long...

Shhh, I'm not supposed to know that. But it's too late for you, all I need to do is lay down the smack down again.

: And since it's Rock-type attack that's super effective!

: FOOLS! I am skilled in many killing arts!

That must mean that she's half-fighting! Oh no, Crabominable!

: What? No, the crab's down there.

No, see it's a-

: Now's not the time to explain a reference! Do something!

: I THINK NOT!

*Esdeath uses flicks her fingers. The water from the soldiers Riri was standing in freezes her in place, while Topaz's wings get frozen to the ground.*

Ergh... You shouldn't be this powerful.

: Thanks to Specs' jewel I have even more powerful ice powers. And don't think that I'm the only one with a power up.

*Esdeath pulls the back of Topaz's head, aiming him to look at the battle between Lindy and Frolaytia. The crab beast gets up, the heavy armor revealing a mecha inside, which looks more like a hermit crab with a big claw though maintaining the large claw. Bursts of electrical energy spark off the big claws.*

: Wah hah hah! You've only broken the outer shell! Now you shall have to face Magnaclaw!

I swear I know those names from somewhere...

: No matter, as the name NeoEsdeath will be the one to bring upon your doom!

: We can't use that terrible name, Zettai already used that joke!

: I care not for him. He shouldn't even read this horrible trash!

I agree and apologize!

: Don't worry. My magical hero powers will make me surpass this dumb-looking mecha!

: I'm the one with the dumb looking mecha?!

Yes.

: Totally.

: I-Indeed.

: You're all just lying! What do you think, Esdeath?

*Esdeath looks away.*

: You too?

: Well, I'd much rather get my hands dirty personally, but no matter. Take care of them.

: Not while I'm still around!

*Lindy uses a combination of attacks against the mecha, but the new form seems more resilient.*

: Aim for the flag post!

: Right!

*Lindy goes to grab it, snapping it and making it barely staying on. However, Frolaytia grabs her with the smaller claw, trapping her with electrical energy.*

: AAAAAH!

: Wah hah hah! Looks like you're weak against this machine's electrical powers.

: You can make her suffer later. For now, get the flag!

: Hawawa~

*Koumei flusters as she's still holding Topaz's flag. The crab mecha aims its larger claw at the tactician loli, powering up the electrical energy.*

: Here it comes!

: NOOO!

: NOOO!

Quick, now!

: There's nothing a fool like you can do! ELECTRIC LASER!

*The mecha fires out the electrical laser at Koumei.*

Posted by emperortopaz | May 24, 9:42 AM | 0 comments
May 17th, 2018
Anime Relations: Heavy Object
This is the Four-hundredth-ninety-fourth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone. We're in the barren valley from last week, where we talked about Lindy. And then some villains showed up and want to start something.

: Is that all we are? Just “some villains”? I'll have you know that I was one of Aldra's top generals during that battle!

Sure, but now you're what, a May boss? That's quite the downgrade.

: Be careful, Topaz. This may be the case where you fight a difficult boss but then later on it shows up as a normal enemy!

: Don't forget that I'm here as well.

: Believe us, we've tried.

: Though I'm surprised that we stayed outside this whole time. At least it didn't rain.

Rain.... *shudder*

: What's wrong with him?

: He has to stand out in the rain for work. But that doesn't matter now, it's time for him to do his blog!

That's right. It's Thursday again and that means that we'll take a look at...

Today's girl is:



Frolaytia Capistrano
from
Heavy Object


: Hey! Are you trying to talk about Frolaytia without asking permission?

: What a rascal! You should be a gentleman and at least ask first.

I'm not forced to ask when a villain is attacking. It makes it so that you're not able to attack before letting me set up.

: So no Sucker Punches while he's using non-damaging moves.

: Eh?

: Video game thing, you shouldn't mind it too much.

: So you like games don't you... How about you and me go behind those rocks and have a “game” of our own.

I'm sorry, but this is no place for that type of thing.

: Eh? But I thought that you enjoyed being at the mercy of dominant girls like us. I'm sure that we'll make you feel really good...

*Esdeath and Frolaytia squeeze Topaz between their bodies.*

: Very... very good...

*She even teases his ear, making Topaz squeak out a cute noise.*

N-no, I have to be strong and not fall prey to such distractions!

: Nonsense. Just let us distract you, and you'll never have to do your blog again...

*Frolaytia holds Topaz's chin and goes for a kiss, but she soon catches something out of the corner of her eye. The two girls get away from Topaz, falling on their asses as they move so quickly. There, holding her scythe which she swung at the duo, is Ririchiyo.*

: STAY AWAY FROM MY TOPAZ!

Thank you for saving me from that!

: Oh don't lie. I know you enjoyed that. Just get on with the blog before I run you through too!

I understand! But can you at least revert back first?

*Ririchiyo returns to normal.*

: I will do that, but remember that you need to get going!

Of course!

Head
Hair: Frolaytia has some good, if odd and unique, hair. The first advantage is the color. While not dark it does appeal to my enjoyment of white hair by looking fairly close. She does have some either blue or purple highlights (depends on the picture) which improves it slightly. I suppose that technically Frolaytia's hair color is silver, but regardless for a light color it's pretty good. Though it does say that she dyes it, which hurts a little as I like non-died hair as I'm a poor purist like that. The length is pretty good too, reaching about her mid-back and being wavy. This is surprising as she has a round bun on the top of her head, and usually hair gets pulled away towards a bun so it looks better than one would expect. She also usually keeps a pin in the bun, though in one Christmas image it's a piece of holly. Frolaytia has some strange bangs though, with many zigzags on the left, a long middle bang that's slanted, and a gap over her right eye. She also has three clips in the right side of her bangs too. Her sides are better, though they are multi-tier with a straight cut near her cheek but more going down the front to about her chest. Overall the color is pretty nice and I like the length, but Frolaytia's hair is too complex for my tastes and she has too many decorations. If only she had her hair down for an image or two she might do better, but sadly that is not the case.
Grade: B

: Hey, my hair is the perfect length. At least it never covers my ass!

: When it's up at least. Though that would be more appealing if you actually had buttshots.

: Hey, I had one or two! Isn't that right, Topaz?

That's right, Frolaytia had buttshots?

: That doesn't sound sure enough.

It's been a while since the show, and I'm certainly not confident that she shows her ass in the show proper. But that's for another area.

: Ah yes, sorry for BUTT-ing ahead.

Although some may CRACK up at that joke I'm afraid that it's fallen flat.

: Hee hee...

: Don't encourage Topaz.

: Oh no. It's more that I find it amusing how similar Frolaytia and my hair are and yet I did so much better.

You have a couple more hair styles for variety and a more uniform color. But other than that I don't like comparing girls that directly, at least while the blog is still ongoing.

: That is understandable. Proceed with the blog.

On it!

Eyes: Frolaytia's eyes are pretty good. She has a really great shape, with the tsurime straight-ish upper lid which really fits with her dominant personality. It makes her look really intimidating and sexy. Her eye color is also purple, which is not only my favorite but fits with her hair color (at least sometimes). Overall she does really well here, with the only disadvantage being that she doesn't wear glasses.
Grade: B+

: Oh? So you enjoy my eyes? I bet you'd like them even more if I glare at you above like this.

*Frolaytia then pushes Topaz over, and he looks up at her glaring down in a dismissive fashion.*

Oh yes, you look like you'll scold me in a stern yet oddly sexual manner!

: I'm honestly surprised he can see your face with those “objects” in the way.

I'm not that easily distracted... anymore.

: I meant size-wise.

: They aren't THAT big. Besides, I'm sure that the blog allows him to view whatever he wants.

: Though that's not the only thing that the blog allows, now is it...

*Esdeath and Frolaytia take off their boots and start stepping on Topaz's body, making it quiver.*

: Oh my, look at how much he's squirming just from our feet. How pathetic.

: I agree. Perhaps we should punish him right in front of the others and in the middle of the blog.

*The two dominant generals have smug and sadistic grins as they look down at Topaz. However, they hear the familiar sound of a scythe.*

: Oh no! That's the deadliest of all farm equipment.

: That's right, so you'd better back away.

: You cannot deny us fanservice. We know that Topaz wants it. Or maybe Ririchiyo is jealous that she can't give what he craves the most.*

That's enough you two!

*Topaz gets up, the two girls moving and Riri reverts to normal form. He stands up and brushes himself off.*

I did appreciate the glare, but we're getting too distracted.

*Esdeath and Frolaytia slip on their boots again.*

: So you're saying we'll be able to play more... Delightful.

What? No!

: You should still continue with the blog, Topaz. The sooner you continue the quicker it will be done.

Good point. Let's continue onward!

Face: Frolaytia does somewhat poorly here. Not extremely bad, but she does have some factors going against here. Her face doesn't get as comedic as some of her costars, and while she does have a good dominant grin her other facial expressions aren't too interesting or memorable. She also has a fair-sized nose, which is always an issue with me. She also has a bit of the JC Staff generic face syndrome at times, or maybe I'm being a little over sensitive. Still, Frolaytia's face isn't exactly the best though that doesn't mean she's ugly or anything. I guess I just expect better than what I've seen from her or Esdeath. Oh, and Frolaytia also often has a kiseru, which is a kind of pipe, in her mouth. I am strongly against smoking, which means that her “namesake” is a big turn off.
Grade: C

: Grrr! I knew that Frolaytia wouldn't do well here, just like me. What do you have against dominant girls, Topaz?

It's not that I have something against dominant girls. In fact, I'd probably spot you a few points if I had to do you again.

: Though you'd lose more in the exchange due to your mamocentric scenes.

: I knew that you had it in for me regardless, and now you're taking it out on my minion!

: That's right! There's nothing wrong with my face!

Considering I just talked about the issues with it I think there are issues. Especially with your smoking. Plus you really don't have any memetic dommy faces either. I like my doms to have memorable smirks or grins to show their amusement in the situation. It's not that you're ugly or anything, you're just extremely plain. Hence the average score.

: Sometimes being forgettable is worse than being terrible.

Exactly. At least terrible things can be remembered. Even if we don't want to... Speaking of which-

Body
Build: Frolaytia has measurements!... That I really wish she didn't. Her height is pretty good at 173 cm and her weight is 51 kg, but that's where the good stats end. Frolaytia's three sizes are 97-58-81, and those are some really badly mamocentric measurements! I know that sometimes sizes are bad, but a difference of SIXTEEN is far too much. To put it in other terms, the terrible series DxD doesn't have a difference that large, and Senran Kagura's main girls aren't that bad (with the bustiest girl Murasaki being pretty bad herself but not one of the original cast). It's absolutely awful, and I want to say that the author picked numbers randomly because stats aside Frolaytia isn't that bad! While she doesn't show it too much (an issue I'll bring up in the next section) her ass is still pretty nice. She even shows it off naked in an official image, even if there's dreaded steam in the way somewhat (you can still see her nice curve though). Her legs are also nice, as are her feet. Her thighs look particularly thick and meaty as well, which her pantyhose emphasizes a little. Overall Frolaytia is dragged down by her bad measurements which make no sense other than to troll and offend smart fans. She still has a pretty nice body, with a shapely ass and legs and her tall intimidating height is sexy as well.
Grade: B-

: Considering the complaints you have about my measurements I have a halfway-decent ending score. Perhaps you are looking to become my private and obey my every command after all?

I don't see how that has anything to do with the blog or scores.

: She means that she thinks you're praising her in order to get on her good side.

Not at all. I just like explaining the truth to my readers. It's a real shame that the measurements are so awful. And the series is so awful as well. At least fanservice-wise anyway.

: Oh? But I was pretty sure that you enjoyed it...

*Frolaytia starts poking her finger against Topaz's cheek, whispering and blowing in his ear dominantly. He shivers from this.*

: I'm sure we can have a lot of fun, if only you'd allow me...

N-no thanks! I have my blog to do, and I need to stop getting distracted!

: Topaz is bad with distractions, and I'm not just talking about the girls in the blog itself.

Shhh. Anyway, let's continue.

Chest: It's just a shame that that's all thrown out the window by Frolaytia having large breasts. As mentioned before her chest size is 97 cm and she's very busty and bouncy. Almost every scene she's in has a bit of fanservice of her chest, and she gains the nickname “Titan tits” or something similar, pardon my French. I would blame JC Staff for this horrible area, but as fitting as that would be for J-Cup Staff it seems that there's a lot of mamocentric fanservice in the light novels as well. So be impressed as an infant apparently wrote this series, as that would be the only explanation I can see. Still, she does quite poorly here.
Grade: C

: So even her manga is horribly mamocentric?

Light novel, but indeed. If anything I think that JC Staff took out some useless moments like at the Christmas party.

: Ah yes. I don't remember that too well.

: From what I've heard you got drunk and sandwitched Qwenthur between your and Lendy's breasts.

: Whoa, whoa. Leave me out of this. Especially since I was able to avoid the train wreck that was ViViD.

: I said “Lendy”, not “Lindy”.

Lendy being a character from the series, one that I nicknamed “Brown Takane” due to the similar white hair. Though believe me, Takane is far superior (and not just due to Lendy having Rina Satou for a VA). Anyway, I suppose that having some mamocentric service wouldn't be BAD...

: Great then. How about Esdeath and I start-

NO! I don't mean in the blog! I meant in the series, and even then I was about to say that it would have only been acceptable if they didn't force it so much and was more fair with the ass-service too. Something like having Milinda show off her fat bare ass more than just in the first episode, or maybe have it jiggle in her bodysuit at times. Just SOMETHING would be good as otherwise the first episode gives a false impression that it would be fair.

: And hopefully we'd eliminate that horrible eye cancer-I mean eye catch.

: Hey now. That's Ohoho's fault that she had that.

Still though, you're not completely innocent when it comes to Milinda being self-conscious. If only she'd learn that asses are great, especially with her slender figure.

: Also destroy the trope of “She's slender so that makes it okay for her to have big boobs even if her measurements are small”.

Agreed. That type of thinking is poisoning the watering reserves, destroying magical towns, and shooting cities with a light beam.

: The trope is a clown?

Not really, I thought of "poisoning the crops" first but I drew a blank on the rest of the quote and went with dumb humor instead. Like always.

: Well, since you're blanking on jokes how about you continue with the blog. I'm certainly getting tired of this area.

Fair point, let's go on!

Clothes: Fortunately Frolaytia does a lot better here. Much like Lindy she tends to wear a suit, which is always a plus for me. She wears a light blue jacket with ornamentation and breast pockets, a matching tight skirt, white button-down shirt, pantyhose, and a red necktie. Other outfits she wears are pretty nice too, which include a purple kimono with cleavage, a red sports bra and shorts to exercise in, a Christmas red bikini, and both a yellow bikini and a black one (though sadly the latter is just from the waist up). There are some mamocentric issues with her outfits, but as a whole it's not exactly the outfits bringing attention to her chest but the bad angles. I can't say if there are more outfits in the light novels or not (seems that there's a lot) but I'll just go along with the anime and official art for now.
Grade: A

: Sounds like you really like my outfit then...

: Wait a second...

*Ririchiyo looks at Frolaytia, then Esdeath, and then Lindy.*

: I'm the only one that's not wearing a suit!

That's a good point. Quick, put one on!

*Riri slaps Topaz over the head in a comedic way.*

: I don't have one, and even if I did I wouldn't change in front of you! (note to self, get a suit)

: So is it just the tie that I need to change for a higher score?

That would definitely help, but Frolaytia having pantyhose more reliably as well as more variety helps her out too. But let's continue the blog, as there's still quite a bit to get through.

Mind
Personality: Frolaytia is a strict commanding officer, a Major to be precise. She is the main boss of the two lead guys and is the main one to push them around to dangerous missions. She does care about them, even if the missions themselves are quite challenging. Frolaytia does punish them for misbehaving, but whether that's because she cares about them or if it's just because she's cruel I can't be sure. Still, this makes her seem like a very dominant but also caring leader which I find extremely sexy. She's rough but in a sexy and dominant way, it's kinda hard to describe. Frolaytia is also a huge fan of Japan, often smoking a kiseru as mentioned before. I've heard that the last person to mess with it ended up dead, but that might just be in the light novels. Her room is also Japanese-based, and she wears a yukata to a fancy event. One might say that she's trying too hard, especially since I'm not sure if anime/manga exists in their world. If it did maybe they wouldn't mock humanoid mechas as they'd see the appeal in them. Of course, I can't forget Frolaytia's biggest advantage. She's voiced by Shizuka Itou who makes Frolaytia sound amazing. She has such a way with teasing seductive voices, especially ones that are older than the male leads, it seems. Ah~ Her voice just makes me want to have Frolaytia scold me so much that I start tearing up and she has to comfort me! Er, forget that. Anyway, despite being dominant Frolaytia does have a soft spot for both her privates and civilians, being one of the rare examples of a good military leader. Overall I do like Frolaytia and she appeals to me fairly well.
Grade: B+

: See? I knew that you liked me!

I never said that I didn't. Just that you have some issues here and there.

: Then again, I'm pretty sure that Topaz watched the show just for you.

Shhhh. Though I will say that Frolaytia is one of the reasons I enjoyed it as much as I did. The other part being seeing the two male leads bumble about as they took care of things. I liked watching the set-up episode and seeing how it will help them beat the next Object.

: In other words, Topaz is so simple that he sees the heavy foreshadowing and acts like he thinks of what's going to happen.

It's a fine line between making foreshadowing too obvious and still trying to drop hints for your readers/listeners. I certainly know that well...

: Enough complaining about your poor writing, Topaz. Let's just get going!

Great point, as if we linger further I'll just prove how bad I am at writing decently!

Libido: Frolaytia is a little bit difficult to scale here. On one hand she does a pretty good job at being dominant, using her rank as a superior officer to tease the two guys. I myself would really enjoy being teased by her (with payoff, of course). It's helped by her seductive voice as well. The guys also like being kicked by her and one even likes her armpits, both of which I'm not into (at least not kicking if she has shoes on). Frolaytia does get a little flustered at times, especially when she doesn't have control. She also steals their porn, but that might be a military rule (even if it's possible that she planted it to tease them). Frolaytia does have a sad past as she seems to be courted by many people who only want one thing. Meaning an heir, what were you thinking? Anyway, Frolaytia is from a line where it's assured that she'll have a 100% chance of a male heir, which is something idiotic when you think about it. But one look back at those measurements shows that this author isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. He's probably not even in the shed with an IQ barely surpassing that of a rock-er, sorry as I've gotten off track. Anyway, Frolaytia does pretty well being dominant and teasing but really doesn't do too much to push it either. I have no idea if that's different in the LN but as far as the anime goes she's nothing more than a (admittedly good) tease.
Grade: B-

: I dislike guys who only like me for my body. Those suitors can get so out of hand.

: Please rephrase that this instant. And rephrase your body too, it's offensive and gross.

I still don't understand what's the big deal about a male heir either.

: Many noble families are very proud it seems.

But female heirs seem so much sexier! And not just for the obvious, as it makes them sound dominant and powerful!

: I don't know why people are like that, but that's why I'll be in the military until I die or I become old.

But it still makes no sense! Gender, from what I can tell, is determined by the male! Y-chromasome and all that fancy biology stuff!

: Wait what.

: So you're saying that her author is an idiot then.

: Like we really needed more proof.

Are you talking about Frolaytia's measurements or the fact that he mocked humanoid robots.

: Both. He's an awful creator that should stick with Index only.

Index only final destination?

: Right, no Railgun.

Good plan. And speaking of good plans let's finish up the blog!

Age: Frolaytia has an official age, and she's 18. This is a pretty good score, though maybe a bit higher could have been understandable. Especially because people complain that she's a Major at such a young age, though I don't mind too much. Still, a good age especially considering that the duo of male leads are both 17 which makes her the older one in either pair. She was also born in Paris France, which perhaps explains a little but doesn't affect her too much.
Grade: A

Total Grades: 72
Average score: 8
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

: That's surprisingly better than I expected...

: Still not as great as a woman like me deserves!

: Now now, Topaz cannot give all ladies high scores. He has to be fair.

: I'm just being disliked because I'm a villain! This is so unfair!

Who said life was fair? Besides, it's not that you're disliked because your a villain, you're a villain because you carry evil baggage.

: Exactly, and they're hanging off your chest in a disgusting manner.

: That's it! I don't have to take this! Esdeath, it's time for us to unleash our plan!

: I hope the plan has nothing to do with my previous statement.

: That is correct. Topaz! We're going to be playing a little game.

: Still worried.

: No need to be worried, assistant. We're going to be playing...

: Capture the flag!

*As Esdeath mentions that Frolaytia brings out a blue and red flag attached to poles.*

: Wait, where did those come from?

: No need to worry about that. We'll just give you the blue one and the first team to capture the opposing one wins.

And I can use any girl I want from this month? This should be easy.

: Do not be sure...

*Frolaytia snaps her fingers and out from the ground comes a powerful machine. It looks like big crab, with one claw bigger than the other.*

: So that's what a potential Mega Kingler would look like.

I like how it's become half-Steel. Though I'll be disappointed if it doesn't get Tough Claws.

: This is no time for jokes.

What? I haven't heard of that! There's always time for jokes!

: That's right. Just look at Topaz being here now...

Exactly-wait.

: Stop your banter! As you can see we have this Object that will be carrying out flag. But do not worry, I shall face YOU in particular. We have a lot of unfulfilled aggression between us, even if it's one sided.

You're still angry about the blog? I sometimes score poorly, so get over it!

: NO! It is the fact that you were a coward and had that flame witch face me! This time I want to see your true power!

But I have to give advice to Lindy and Riri, as I'd be the one in charge!

: We're in bad shape if that's the situation.

: Why? Is Topaz bad at tactics games?

: Most games, to be fair. But indeed. It's why he cheats in Fire Emblem to level up his guys and get a lot of money.

I am awful at planning ahead. Maybe you're right. Having a dedicated strategist would be useful.

: Please don't say that you're going to summon Robin or something.

No, I'm not talking about the Smash fighter of many names. I'm thinking more of an anime character.

: HEY! What's going on down there? Are we going to fight soon? Ol' IronClaw is getting bored of not fighting!

Where have I heard that name before... Oh well, it looks like I'll have to summon someone to help.

: Oh? Are you going to be like that idiot and use “Summon Boobs”?

I wouldn't do something as disgusting as that. In fact, just for that reference I'll do the opposite!

: Summon ass?

: You're going to be bringing Yamato? I do agree that he would be helpful, but-

Sadly it won't be “summon ass” or the ass-loving Yamato from Majikoi. I can't even summon guys for the latter. What I mean is that I'll be bringing a loli. Though that doesn't mean she has a small ass either.

: A young girl? You'd waste one of your precious picks on a useless girl like that?

If she can help the girls prepare their tactics while I'm facing Esdeath she'll Shuri-er, surely be helpful!

: Wait. I think I know who it is. Is it a girl with light blue hair, twintails, and a potentially yuri love towards the meganekko your brown favorite likes?

You're very close. You've just got the wrong show, as otherwise the namesake is the same. And while it's a shame that you readers have to wait a week for the battle to begin, I'm sure you'll look forward to this sweet yet perverse girl with a cute hat!
Posted by emperortopaz | May 17, 7:54 AM | 0 comments
May 10th, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-ninety-third week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*The blog begins with Topaz and Ririchiyo traveling down a barren valley.*

: Topaz.

Yes?

: Remind me why we're in this desolate area. With the heat of the sun beating down on us.

We needed to travel to this open area so that the girl in question can land her ship. She doesn't have too much time due to her busy schedule so we had to come here to meet her. Besides, it's not THAT warm here.

: You endure heat far better than you can cold, can't you...

Certainly. Now let's see... *opens map* She was supposed to meet us around here somewhere...

: TOPAZ, LOOK OUT!

*Riri tackles Topaz, the two rolling out of the way as a large spacecraft lands where he was standing. The door then opens and a tall motherly woman comes out. Her hand is against her mouth, apologizing.*

: Sorry about that, Topaz. I hadn't seen you and the landing sequence had already started.

Everything's fine, so don't worry about that. I'm just glad that you were able to meet with us.

: Of course. I'd love to hear the opinions of another blogger.

: Wait, now I recognize you. Zettai talked about you many years ago!

That he did! Wait, that's where you know her from?

: Let's not split hairs, Topaz. But I suppose that Lindy will be this year's Mother's day blog.

That's right! At least if she allows me to talk about her.

: If I did not agree to having my blog done, do you think I would have met with you today?

*Lindy snaps her fingers. Magically a table, umbrella, and several chairs come out. As does a kettle, three cups, and various coffee condiments. Lindy sits at one of the seats elegantly.*

: But to be sure, I will allow you to talk about me. I look forward to hearing what you think. Now, would you please take a seat?

*Riri and Topaz are still in awe of Lindy's skills, but they sit down at the table.*

: I have tea prepared. Would you two like some?

No thank you. I'm not too big on teas.

: Topaz has a dumb American tongue. But I'd enjoy some green tea.

: Glad to be of service then.

*Lindy elegantly pours some green tea for Ririchiyo and then herself. Riri is then surprised as Lindy puts in cream and sugar in her cup.*

What's the matter?

: Er, nothing. Just that seeing that in person is a little more shocking than I'd expect.

: Whatever do you mean?

: N-nothing. Hey, Topaz. Since you're not drinking how about you start the blog?

That is a good point. And as she came here to be talked about how could I not say that...



Head
Hair: Lindy has very lovely hair. She has light green hair, which while it could be darker for my preferences, does look really good. Her bangs are long, reaching into her eyes slightly but having some gaps as to not affect her sight. Her bangs are also open in the middle, but more on that later. Speaking of her bangs she does have M-shaped air flaps on the top of her head, which seemed to be popular among mothers during this time. In Strikes she doesn't have that though, instead having a bump of hair on her right side. Lindy also has long side curls, reaching past her shoulders and looking quite great. Lindy's ears are visible, but that's mostly because her hair is pulled into a long ponytail around the top of her head. Her ponytail seems to reach her thighs or so, meaning her hair is really quite long. It also spreads out with a little bit of wavy appeal. In StrikerS Lindy's ponytail is a little bit different, as it comes out at the bottom of her head and is a lot more narrow (likely because of the big bow holding it in place). I do still like it, and both versions have their appeal. In general Lindy does really well, I like her sexy hair though it might be nice to see her with her hair down. I'm not sure if there was a moment or not, sadly my memory isn't too great. Lindy's ponytails are still excellent though! She also seems to have had shorter hair in the past, but having girls grow their hair is far better than the opposite. Wish anime these days behaved...
Grade: A-

: Why? What happened with anime today?

There's far too many haircuts....

*Topaz shivers in a corner of despair.*

Really, there's far too many to mention. It's still worth complaining about as it's absolutely awful and unforgivable.

: You'd think that after the third or something they might be calming down, but no. It hasn't even been halfway through the year and there's far too many haircuts.

Even just one haircut is too much. I blame Monogatari...

: That series is to blame for so much. From the haircuts and mamocentric scenes to the light novel adaptation craze and making SHAFT focus on that terrible series.

Being fair there were adaptations before Monogatari. Not that I'm excusing them, but-

: Fine then. Meta-aware light novels then.

That sounds more right. Boo Monogatari becoming Moneygatari and forcing studios to try and chase that terrible business model.

: Somehow I think that we got distracted... How about we return to the blog?

Oh, sorry about that. Let's continue speaking of Lindy then!

Eyes: Lindy has a pair of lovely eyes. They are tarame, but that fits her gentle and caring nature well. She also has green eyes, a slightly darker shade than her hair I think but it contrasts well regardless. The art style also makes her eyes pop a little, like they do with most characters which is a nice effect. Lindy also has nice outer corners, with a fairly thick black line that I like. I would say that she could use glasses, but other than that Lindy's eyes are very pretty.
Grade: B

: Hmmm, so you're that glasses-loving blogger that I've heard so much about. I have something that I forgot to put on the last time I was talked about, so if you don't mind...

*Lindy pulls out a pair of red framed glasses and puts them on, adjusting them nicely.*

Bravo! Bravo! Great appeal! I approve!

: Sounds like Zettai's assistants suggested that you wear those.

: That the dominant girls did.

: Katja?

No, this was before she arrived. Even if Chiaki came first. But I suppose that they distracted you by talking about “brown eyes”.

*Lindy gets flustered.*

: Y-yes. I wasn't sure what they meant back then, but now I do.

: Don't be embarrassed-quick, Topaz! Change the subject before she becomes too flustered!

On it! Wait, why are we changing the subject from asses? That sounds bad.

: Asses come later!

Fair. It's time to look at Lindy's other pair of cheeks first!

Face: Lindy has a fairly simple face though one that looks quite good. I really like the art style of the Nanoha series, if only it would become more famous. She does have a fair-sized nose sometimes, but nothing too troubling. Lindy's cheek is also round and looks nice, and her chin is rounded most of the time as well. And don't think I missed the four dots on her forehead, as I was saving that for this area. Apparently they're from Toy Box, the earlier version of Nanoha, and she was a fairy in that series. Overall she does really well here, though I'm not too big on girls who show off their foreheads. Still, Lindy is a very beautiful and mature woman.
Grade: B

: Hmmm, Zettai doesn't talk about faces.

There's a lot of differences between our blogs. Especially now.

: Even the point totals are completely different. Zettai has a lower cap, at 100 now.

Right, and even then he'd admit that you'd do TONS better due to having more screentime and a certain image. He mentioned that you'd have like 70 more points now!

: Oh dear me!

: That's seventy points total, Topaz! TOTAL! It's not even possible for her to get 128 points or so!

Fair point, I suppose that I read it wrong.

: Hmmm... 128 is coincidentally the size of my fat ass. Or at least the last time I measured... May have gotten bigger since.

*Lindy calmly takes a drink of her tea. Topaz makes a double take, wondering if Lindy just whispered what he thought.*

W-what did you say?

: Nothing much, just humming.

: Why, what do you think she said?

It sounded like she admitted her true ass-size.

: Don't be ridi-CULO-us, Topaz.

Nice pun!

: Yeah, but I'm not proud of it. So what did she say?

: It shouldn't matter. That's not my official canon size.

That's true...

: Just the blog one.

*If Topaz was drinking tea he would have had a spit take from this revealed information. Lindy has her index, middle, and thumb out in a cute fashion and her head slightly tilted in a cute manner. Topaz coughs a bit from this display.*

: Calm down, Topaz. We can't have you die to water like this. Not after all the villains you've defeated and foiled.

Fair fair... How about we go to the next area then?

: You mean my ass, right?

*Topaz does a spit take again, coughing from Lindy's frankness.*

Y-yeah... Let's get going then....

Body
Build: It really sucks that Lindy doesn't have measurements. Still, she looks really good like an adult should. She's possibly tall, though I can't be sure as that may just be because she begins being tall with a lot of lolis. She also ends up shorter than her son, which while expected is sorta unfortunate. Lindy has nice legs and hips, having a really nice figure which this series is known for. Her legs are so nice that Nanoha's mother pokes her thigh in a recent official image (caution, NSFW). Overall, Lindy is a beautiful mother and-

Oh?

Heh, of course, I haven't forgotten about the MAIN eye grab in that image. Do you really think that I would forget mentioning LINDY'S FAT BARE ASS? Man, we had to wait a while for it, but seeing Lindy's ass is amazing, as is her ass in general! It was especially surprising as she hadn't had too much fanservice in the series proper, especially because her outfits had a habit of covering her ass. More than just with a skirt or panties or something. But man, Lindy's ass is really round and shiny, looking really nice. Even if Fate isn't her biological daughter I wonder if Lindy's meals are the reason both have such excellent asses, true miracles of the universe. We can only hope that the series continues with showing off Lindy's ass, as well as the other girls (including the other mothers) and keeping the cool battles as well. That's not asking too much, right?
Grade: A-

: That is far better than what Zettai gave me.

That's all because of that one really nice official image. It's a shame that it came so late, though coincidentally I was planning on discussing you anyway this year so it's lucky that the image appeared.

: You're so lucky we should call you Lucky Lindy!

That's probably not a good plan. Then Fate would have to go missing.

: ...No one is going to get that terrible historic reference.

: Ahem, shall we continue?

That's right. We have plenty more of the blog to do.

: I meant more about my ass in particular. In fact, I believe that I have some video for you...

: Let me guess... It's of you and Zettai from yesterday?

: No? He was in space yesterday.

Must be from before he left. But anyway, let's roll that beautiful bean-filled footage!

: You know people won't get that dumb commercial reference either, right?

I suppose, but no matter as I write what amuses me!

: And sometimes that's the problem...

: Well, while those two are arguing let's take a look at this...



Hmmm, that did look lovely. I'm sure that Zettai enjoyed it quite a bit.

: Oh he certainly did. Believe me...

: Can we finally get back to the blog...

I suppose it is about that time.

Chest: Lindy doesn't show off her chest all too much. Even in the early seasons where shes the “good” adult female and fanservice of her would be understood she doesn't show off. There is the bad ViViD image with all the girls showing off their chests in the hot springs, but it's also ViViD which fails. She does show the side of her chest in the image I mentioned earlier, but the focus is more on her ass. Regardless, Lindy does have a fairly ample bosom, as expected of being older and a mother I suppose. It's a nice shape without bringing too much focus. She does well here, is what I'm saying. Though more ass service again would be great.
Grade: B

: Wait, I just realized something.

We don't need you to think of anything after I talk about Lindy's chest, Riri.

: No, this is back in the other area. If Lindy had met with Zettai earlier she seemed to know that he'd give her a higher score now, but talking with Topaz earlier she seemed surprised about it! This makes no sense!

No, it totally makes sense. I'm inconsistent and dumb at times, especially when writing.

: You aren't that bad, Topaz. Stop insulting yourself.

It's not an insult. I blame me not having much planned and just writing what I think of. Sometimes the difference between days is inconsistent so that leads to bad plot ideas and dumb jokes.

: Now now, there's nothing wrong with that.

But the only reason would be if you were intentionally trying to tease us with that. And you're not the type of woman who would do that-

: Tee hee...

*Lindy sticks out her tongue and taps her forehead with her knuckle.*

Wait, no. That does sound like something you'd do. Well, let's continue with the blog then!

Clothes: Lindy doesn't have many outfits, but the one we see her wearing the most is definitely worth a look. She usually wears a dark blue military uniform jacket with white shirt, blue necktie, and white tight pants (well, it's possible that it's pantyhose. It's hard to tell due to how tight they are). I really like this look as it's like Lindy wears a suit and those are one of my favorites. Sadly as far as variety goes Lindy doesn't do as well. Her casual outfit includes a brown jacket, a white skirt, brown stole and a tight brown skirt. She also wears blue-ish pantyhose so at least one of her outfits has them. She also has a few other outfits, such as a sweater in StrikerS, but I can't remember her too much. There's also a sketch of her in an apron, though over clothes and not naked apron. While not too varied the few outfits still impress me, namely the great suit. Though as mentioned earlier it is unfortunate that a lot of outfits of hers tend to cover her ass.
Grade: B+

Though the question is, what kind of panties does Lindy wear.

: *blushes* That's not a question you should ask women, Topaz.

But I'm still curious. Plus it might help out the score a bit more.

: Topaz, blog things don't affect-MMPH!

*Topaz covers Ririchiyo's mouth.*

: Well, if it will help... I wear a black thong!

Really! I'm surprised!

: Sometimes Fate and I share outfits, at least when she can fit her fat ass in them. Not that my ass is slender by any means, but still. Anyway, I've taken to wearing panties like she does as they work well with my fat ass.

Sounds great. How about giving us a show? For proof, of course.

: I don't see any issue with that. Here, take a look!

*Lindy then bends over, lifting her skirt and lowering her pantyhose. However, Topaz notices something missing.*

A-are you sure you're wearing a thong?

: I'm pretty sure. You might have to look close to see, as it's probably deep between my fat ass.

That's fair.

*Topaz gets closer, but still doesn't see Lindy's thong. He does see a great shot of her fat bare ass though.*

I still don't see anything.

: I can't stay quiet any longer. Lindy, you forgot your thong!

: I couldn't be that absent-minded... It's just deep between...

*Lindy reaches for the thong that she's not wearing, and finally realizes that she's not actually wearing one. She quickly pulls her pantyhose up and adjusts her skirt, her face bright red.*

: O-Oh my, I'm sorry for such a display.

Don't worry. I certainly enjoyed it.

: *Sigh* Can't we get through the rest of the blog without interruptions?

I suppose that we could. Let's get going then!

Mind
Personality: Lindy has a very great personality. She's introduced as the captain of the Arthra/Asura (the ship has a complicated name it seems) and works for the Dimensional Administration Bureau or Time-Space Administration Bureau (again, complicated names). She helps out Nanoha and later Fate as well as the other girls whenever they need it, mostly doing behind the scenes type of government business. She does eventually adopt Fate, becoming a mother though even before that she had Chrono. This means that Lindy is a great working mother, and Reflection certainly showed her being a mother as she went to protect her daughter. I also like how she was worried that Fate wasn't calling her “Mom” yet as I found it cute. Lindy is the main force of good in the series, at least in the original series and A's as after that her screentime tends to be lacking. Not that it's bad that she wasn't in ViViD, that may have helped her out a little but more screentime is good (such as the aforementioned Reflection). Lindy is a ditzy but reliable woman and captain, and is a great example of a “good” mother as she raised two kids by herself very well. She does have some quirks, such as putting sugar and cream in green tea, but those just make her cuter (though it is surprising as it's said that she loves Japan. Enough to move there so that Nanoha and Fate can be together). Overall she's a very good mother and a great captain, and more screentime for her would be a great thing (as would showing her ass more too). Oh and when she uses magic in the original series she has fairy wings, a call back to her earlier form in Lyrical Toy Box.
Grade: A-

Libido: Lindy was once married, though she is currently a widow. She loved her husband very much, and she bore him a child (Chrono). That means that she had sex at least once, unless this universe has strange rules for conception. She was also very devoted to her late husband Clyde. That said, Lindy isn't especially perverse either. The most she seems to do is set her son Chrono up with Amy and be happy about it which seems cute in a matchmaker way. Lindy also has some pairings with Precia due to Innocent, but I don't know much about that series. I've also heard that she's around Leti a lot in the manga too, but as great as a double-mother yuri relationship is I can't be too sure how true it is. Still, while a lack of screentime does mean that Lindy doesn't do well here I think that having a child in general does well for her.
Grade: B-

Age: I'm not quite sure how old Lindy is. She is a mother, and Chrono seems to be ten or so in the first few seasons, but considering the series likes having teenage mothers I think it's hard to tell. I have heard that Lindy is 31, which would place her at 41 during the events of StrikerS. She doesn't grade too well if we go by that, though that's because she popped above my age ranking. Said age ranking is also very outdated, being almost 10 years old now so I'm a lot more acceptable of her now than I would, say, a decade ago (not that she wasn't just as attractive back then, but you know). Still, without a concrete age I cannot give her a perfect score here. She still does very well, though.
Grade: A

Total Grades: 81
Average score: 9
Final Grade: B+

And that's the blog for the week. How did you enjoy it, Lindy?

: It was quite stimulating. I'm so glad that I posed for that image now that I know how much it helped me to succeed.

More girls should show off their bare asses.

: What are you looking at me for...

*Topaz quickly looks away and attempts, poorly, to whistle.*

: Stop acting like a pervert.

I don't need to act like one, I am one. But it is about time to leave. We'll be seeing you sometime soon, Lindy.

: Good bye and-WATCH OUT!

*Lindy tackles Topaz and Riri as a spear of ice smashes into the canyon wall behind them.*

That was close.

: Wh-who would do something like that?!

Probably someone evil and out to destroy me.

???: That's right, Topaz. It is I-RABARTA!

*Topaz stands up and turns to look at this mystery yet familiar-sounding woman.*

Posted by emperortopaz | May 10, 7:21 AM | 0 comments
May 3rd, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-ninety-second week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo are standing outside a Japanese sweets shop.*

: Huh. Compared to the last few months this is a surprisingly normal place.

I know. Between dealing with Chitoge, Momo, and the decidedly less-awful Yamai twins it's good to know that life is still going on around us. And luckily our girl seems to be inside as well.

: That's good-wait, how did you think of using this girl as the blog for this week?

Well, I based it on the fact that I wanted to complete the Nisekoi main girls. I mean, I don't want her to wait long and especially after Chitoge's blog she's already behind.

: Wait, what if the villains figured this out and set out a trap inside.

That was last month, Riri.

: Not THAT kind of trap. The kind that will make you be attacked by villains!

But I don't want to be attacked by zombies when I go into the hotel room! Then again, for the purposes of plot I suppose that I have to.

: I doubt that it would be zombies. It's far more likely that it's some mamocentric girl waiting inside to tempt you in ways that disgust your fans and myself.

I hope that's not what's going to happen. There would be no reason for something like that. But if it's a trap inside I might as well play it up.

: Oh no (Those sound like famous last words). Don't do anything stupid.

When have I done something stupid?

: MANY TIMES!

Then what is one more going to hurt?

*Topaz opens the door and enters. The lovely store clerk turns to welcome him.*

: Hello and welcome to the sho-

ALRIGHT THEN, RAVISH ME!

*Topaz does a silly pose with his arms in the air. The brown haired clerk turns bright red and slides down below the counter, her back to him. She dials her phone in a panic.*

: Ruri! What should I do? Some strange guy came in and told me to “ravish him”!

: It's okay, Kosaki. He might not have been talking to you.

: But there isn't anyone else here. Who else could he be talking to!

: Calm down, calm down. What's he doing now?

*Kosaki peeks over the counter to check.*

: It looks like he's just standing there. His arms are down though, and he's looking at the sweets.

: He was probably just playing around.

Oh, there you are.

*Riri enters.*

: Well, this doesn't seem like a trap so far. Anything look good?

Everything!

: Your sweet tooth is too pampered, and I'm not paying for everything here.

Awww...

: Oh no! A girl came in and is talking with him!

: Perhaps they're dating.

: They do look quite close... But do you think that he was talking to her? They can't have “ravishing” in this store. It's bad enough when that mother from the bakery down the street tried to peddle the really smelly, flat bread she made...

: Well then, go and confront them. I know that you can do it, Kosaki!

: I-if you believe in me...

*Kosaki hangs up and heads over to where Topaz and Riri are standing.*

: H-hello. Is there anything that I can do to help you? We have a special on handmade cakes, if you're curious.

Ah, just what I was looking for.

: Cakes?

No, I mean you my beauty.

: Awooo...

*Kosaki blushes again.*

: Topaz, stop flustering the lovely girl and explain better! We're here to talk about you on his internet blog.

: Don't you mean the store?

No, I mean you. I want the world to know how great Kosaki is!

: He talks about anime girls, and he recently talked about Chitoge as well.

She was terrible.

: B-but Chitoge is a good friend, and I won't stand to hear her get insulted!

: That's why you're a better character. You'd at least stand up to Topaz for your friend.

Alright then, I'll try to keep my Chitoge blasting to a minimum. Though it will be hard.

: At least we'll be talking about someone better this week.

Good point. Well, at least if Kosaki allows us to talk about her.

: W-well, I suppose that I do have the time, but-

See? I knew that you would agree to this. And as she wished...

Today's girl is:



Kosaki Onodera
from
Nisekoi


And being fair I will call her “Kosaki” through the blog, even if she's often called Onodera in the series.

: You sure you're fine with Topaz talking about you?

: Y-yes. I want to show people my appeal and how I should be appreciated more!

Don't worry then, I certainly appreciate you as do a lot of my readers. Now, how about we get started with the blog?

Head
Hair: Kosaki has somewhat short hair, most of it barely reaching her shoulders. She does have a long left sidelock, which does reach all the way to her chest and is her unique feature (such as when the characters are chibi faces or similar moments). She also has short windswept bangs, with the right side of her bangs brushed behind her ear. I'm not too fond of this as it allows her forehead to be seen, but overall I do like her hairstyle. It has a cute unique-ness to it and looks very cute and fitting. I wouldn't mind it being longer, but it is fine as it is. The fact that it's a nice shade of brown does help too. Kosaki has some varieties, such as a ponytail, a braid in her bangs, or a bun on the side of her head, but they just make her look more beautiful I think. She also has cat ears in the Monogatari crossover, as she's cosplaying as Tsubasa. Overall Kosaki does well here, her main issue being that her hair is short and I'm not fond of seeing the bit of forehead/ear.
Grade: B-

Eyes: Kosaki does have lovely brown eyes, which fits with her hair color for added points. Her eyes are a little lighter I think, though I can't be sure as it's a close match. She does have a tarame eye shape, but unlike the grumpy and stern Chitoge it actually fits well. Though also like Chitoge Kosaki has the issue of having eyelashes even if they don't seem as noticeable. Overall a nice pair of brown eyes, and believe me I'm trying hard to not make that joke. We also can't forget that she wears glasses in the Magical Kosaki spin-off, as well as the Majikore game. The former has her wear a pair of red lower-framed glasses, which look fairly nice even if I do prefer full frames. It also helps that as the main character of that spin-off we see Kosaki a lot more than the other characters.
Grade: B

Face: There isn't too much I can say about Kosaki's face. It's simple like the other girls, looking nice and pretty. She doesn't stand out too much, but I do like her small nose and soft-looking features. She also has a very simple but lovable smile. I really enjoy her blushes too, though that's the art style at work.
Grade: B

So what do you think about it so far, Kosaki?

*Kosaki is blushing cutely, her hands against her cheeks.*

: I-it's fine. Do you mind if I take a call?

I didn't hear the phone ring, but of course. We'll be here enjoying the free samples.

: Topaz, just because they're free you can't eat them all.

I know... But that won't stop me from trying!

: Topaz...

*Topaz continues to talk to Riri in the background as Kosaki calls her friend again.*

: Hello again. What's up this time? The guy isn't bothering you again, right?

: Maybe a little. He's talking about parts of my body...

: That does sound troubling and suspicious. What was his name again?

: I believe that his name was “Topaz” and that I would be blogged on.

: Let's see here then...

*On the other side Ruri holds the phone against her shoulder to type on her computer.*

: It says here that he has a blog where he talks about cute girls.

: I don't see why he's talking about me. I'm not that cute.

: Don't say things like that. You're a very beautiful wonderful girl. Raku is a fool for not choosing you, and more of one for choosing Chitoge!

: I agree. But what should I do now?

: My advice is to let Topaz finish his blog. Who knows, Raku might see it and get rid of the parasitic gorilla that's latched onto him.

: That's not nice, Ruri.

: I mean no insults, I'm just a little frustrated that she was pushed so heavily while the far superior girl was pushed to the side so often. And by that I mean you, Kosaki. Anyway, good luck with the blog!

: Thank you for that, and goodbye!

*Ruri hangs up and Kosaki goes back to the other two.*

Are you done with your business?

: Yeah, at least for now. Does that mean that we're going to continue?

Most certainly, so let's go onward!

Body
Build: Kosaki is pretty good here, if a little average but not in a bad way. She's a lot like Chitoge, which makes sense considering the art style. Sadly she doesn't show as much ass though (but she does get a few good moments here and there). There isn't too much to talk about here sadly either. And since I nearly forgot, Kosaki is 157 cm tall and 43 kg. Oh, and due to having her magical girl side exposed she becomes a hermit crab in the spin-off, but gets better and this doesn't actually affect her at all here.
Grade: B

Chest: Kosaki has a few busty moments which is kinda unfortunate. They are mainly in the beginning, before the harem got bigger and Tsugumi joined-er, that wasn't a reference to her chest, but she did become the token busty lightning rod to spare her Mistress and the other girls (most of the time, at least). Kosaki's worst moment may have been the sukumizu pool episode early on, since she's too bouncy considering her outfit. At least she got a few ass shots to balance herself out though. As with the other girls she does show her nipples in the spin-off but while fair-sized I'm not too interested. I'll also mention that Majikore is a little mamocentric, with quite a few of Kosaki's outfits showing some part of her chest, but overall she does alright.
Grade: B-

Clothes: Kosaki has a lot of similarities with Chitoge, at least in this area. She wears the same school uniform as Chitoge, minus the thighhighs which gives the tsundere a head start. Still, Kosaki has a lot of good outfits of her own which include a miko outfit, a sukumizu, a bikini, a kimono, a magical girl outfit in the spinoff/OVAs, and an apron with baker's uniform. Man, the latter would have been great if she had gone naked apron, but sadly I don't think that ever happened (though I haven't read the spin-off, which may have been possible). Like the other main Nisekoi girls Majikore also helps out quite a bit here. Kosaki herself wears a bunny outfit with straps/overalls, a teacher outfit with glasses, a red leotard, a gym uniform with green buruma, a bloomer-like exercise outfit, a tennis dress with visor, a dealer with thighhighs, a cat-eared maid, and a biker bodysuit among others I've probably missed. She also wears Tsubasa's pajamas in the crossover as well.
Grade: A-

*Kosaki is bright red, cutely flustered from the topics that have recently been mentioned.*

: Um, do you think that I can call someone real quick?

Sure, but I don't think that this question is worth phoning a friend for-wait, we aren't even playing a game.

: Topaz, that reference is so dated.

Being fair I'm not exactly youthful either. But I don't mind that you talk to your friend. Go right ahead.

*Kosaki goes to call her friend again.*

Sheesh, I imagine that interrupting my blog so that she can talk to her friends is a little rude.

: Topaz, you didn't tell her ahead of time. She has a life outside your blog.

Fair fair. I suppose that I should have told her we were coming.

: You barely even told ME where we were going. Give the girl some time to compose herself.

I suppose that's alright. Plus I can eat more of these free samples!

: What did I tell you about eating them all.

*We focus on Kosaki talking to her friend again over the phone, with Topaz and Riri doing silly antics in the background.*

: Ruri! Ruri! I think that things have changed a little!

: Oh? Did Raku finally figure out that he chose poorly and he got rid of Chitoge to get with you?

: If only! It's that strange guy, I think Topaz was his name.

: Ah, the blogger.

: He-he did something unspeakable.

: You want me to slug him one? How dare he lay a finger on your beautiful assy body!

: He didn't actually touch me, all he did was talk about my c-chest and b-butt.

: Kosaki, you're a high schooler. At least say “Ass”.

: *Flustered* I-I can't use such language! Especially in a shop like this! I'll tarnish my parents' reputation!

: Fine fine. So what did he say? Something really awful?

: Not really. He praised my outfits and said that I was otherwise okay but not great.

: And you thought that this was worth calling me over? Wait, I don't mean that to be too snarky. It's just that seems like something Shuu would say.

: I-I just wish he would have asked for permission...

: Huh. Usually Topaz asks for permission, unless you're a villain. Is there something that you're not telling me?

: Not at all! *fluster* B-but I think I did give permission...

: Don't worry. I'm sure you were not quite tricked into it. But don't worry, while Topaz might have a perverse mind he won't do anything you won't want to.

: Like Shuu then...

: Exactly. Though I do appreciate you calling me, as I like talking to you like this.

: I like talking to you too. Thank you for comforting me, Ruri.

: Glad I could help.

*Kosaki and Ruri then hang up together, and Kosaki goes back to Topaz and Ririchiyo.*

: Sorry about that. I just had some small things to do.

Don't worry. I understand these things. And sorry about pressuring you into doing this blog.

: Topaz is too lazy to look for other girls. And or distracted by the sweets.

: I'm glad that you enjoy my sweets. I've been improving them quite a bit!

*Kosaki is so proud of her good food that she lets out a visible breath.*

: Go ahead and eat all you want!

SURE!

: Topaz, don't take her up on that.

Fine... And I suppose that we do need to finish up the blog too. I-if that's alright.

: Don't worry. I was a little surprised at first, but since you like my desserts you can't be that bad. Plus maybe this will make people respect me more.

: I wouldn't be too sure. Most of Topaz's readers already understand that you're better than Chitoge...

That much should be obvious. But I'm not here to incite waifu wars either, just discuss girls in general and what I enjoy about them. Speaking of which...



Mind
Personality: Kosaki is a very lovely girl that Raku both fell in love with before the series began, as well as the girl from his past. She's a very sweet and gentle main character, contrasting the rough and tsundere Chitoge. Sadly as this is a Jump series (and a harem one at that) Raku is extremely dense and doesn't notice this. That might be because Kosaki is very reserved and timid, but it's more likely because the universe disliked this pairing and pushes Kosaki to the side as often as possible to make room for the “true” “romance”. Kosaki's personality is a shy and cute one, so I liked her far more than Chitoge. She's also a “normal” girl in that she's not the daughter of mobsters, a trained assassin protecting the previous, nor the daughter of a police chief. She's just a simple daughter of a baker. Kosaki seems to have really good taste buds as well, and she wants to become a great pastry chef. Sadly while her creations look good she's not a good chef in the beginning (the fact that they look good gives her some distinction from Chitoge, but it's still a terrible flaw to give girls just for comedic purposes). She also takes care of Raku which I find cute too. Overall Kosaki is quite cute, if a little basic but there's nothing wrong with such a sweet girl as I like her quite a bit. Oh, and she's also voiced by Kana Hanazawa, who is my favorite VA and fits the timid Kosaki very well.
Grade: B+

Libido: Kosaki tries to do well here. She's very devoted and as the series goes on she turns out to be the girl that Raku promised to marry that was pushing the plot further. However, much like the author they likely forgot all about this plot point sometimes and Raku got infected with Chitoge instead. It really sucks as Kosaki and Raku had such good chemistry together, sharing a love in the beginning that neither knew the other had. Kosaki tried to confess many times, but each time the universe interrupted and ruined the moment. She ends up not being able to confess until it's too late, the disease had already infected Raku too far. Even Kosaki's close friend, the meganekko Ruri, helped out as well! Kosaki eventually allows their marriage, if it eating her up inside. She also marries someone else, no idea who as there's not enough named male characters to even guess, so that her daughter can get with Raku and Chitoge's son (as if the author was trying to salvage his dumb “win” at the last moment for idiotic reasons). It's a shame that Kosaki kept being second to Chitoge's overly praised moments and shoehorning. At least Kosaki seems to win in the spin-off, and their kiss is a lot closer than anything in the manga proper. Something that I forgot to mention is that there's a chapter where the girls get drunk and try to seduce Raku, with Kosaki being no different. I can only imagine what they did to him off-camera xD.
Grade: B-

Age: Kosaki is the same age as Chitoge, Raku, and most of the other characters. She starts the series going into the first year of high school and the series ends with her as a third year, meaning she's between about 15 and 17 like the others. Overall a fairly basic high school age, and for trivia purposes Kosaki's birthday is June 15th (seems the series liked June birthdays, at least for Kosaki and Chitoge). While not older than Raku nor helping her score points I should mention that Kosaki is also an older sister and I tend to like those.
Grade: B+

Total Grades: 73
Average score: 8.1
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for the week! What do you think?

: It seems a little low, but I still appreciate you talking about me and giving me a fair shot.

: Of course. Topaz is quite fair towards the girls he likes, and he tries to be fair against those he dislikes too.

: I see then. But it has been a pleasure spending time with you like this. Thank you for discussing me.

*Kosaki bows slightly.*

I thank you for having us as well. Especially with your delicious desserts. Hopefully Raku will see the error of his ways and return to his true love.

: Or, even better, the magical girl show in the entirety is put out as an OVA and you have sweet glasses-wearing romance.

I agree with that being better and sweeter. But we should be going now. Thanks again.

: Thank you for talking about me as well. If there's anything I can help you with don't hesitate to ask.

*Kosaki waves as the two exit the shop. They talk as they walk away.*

: So now that this blog is done, who are we going to do next time?

Well, let's just say that since Mother's Day is coming up we'll be doing a mother next time. And she's sure to be a magical one indeed.

: There's a lot of magical mothers, I think. You might need to give another hint.

Fair. She's someone that Zettai has talked about, and let's just say that while she isn't related by blood she's a keeper of Fate...

: I hope that this blog won't be too “windy” then...
Posted by emperortopaz | May 3, 7:27 AM | 0 comments
April 26th, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-ninety-first week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We join Topaz and Ririchiyo still in Chitoge's throne room. Chitoge herself is up on her throne, looking down at the others and eating a huge meal. Natose, her butler, waits between her and the blogger and assistant, drooling slightly.*

Welcome back everyone!

: W-wait, we're starting-Snarf Gobble Scarf-Already?

: O-ojousama! Perhaps now should be the time to stop eating... maybe share a little...

: Not right now, Natose. It's finally time for Topaz to talk about me.

I'm surprised you're so excited.

: Of course, because if it was up to me this would be the last blog you'll ever do!

: If only you knew how many girls had thought that before. Topaz is surprisingly tough!

That's right! And like all the rest I shall defeat you and prove that my blog will continue onward!

: Nonsense! I will kill your blog just like I killed the chances for childhood friends to ever win again-MWAH HAH HAH!

How fiendish! I bet you're the reason that Franxx is so terrible!

: Being fair we can't blame her for it being mamocentric or showing manass. That's just plain disgusting. But still, boo people treating the strawberry childhood friend so poorly!

: As she should be! Everyone knows that only the most popular girl can win! Just look at me!

You mean the one who continually lost to Marika so hard they had to change the voting system? Or Marika the one who got shoes and other gifts sent to her?

: Even if I was heavily biased I still won the final popularity poll, so THERE! PLUS I'm more favorited on MAL than the other three PUT TOGETHER!

: Never use MAL as a scale to judge popularity. I mean those people like PRISON SCHOOL for goodness sake. And GoPri! And other terrible series and characters!

Exactly. But for now let's look at Shitoge-er, Chitoge. Sorry, I misspelled it a little...

: YOU DID NOT AND YOU KNOW IT! That was on purpose! I know you use CTRL+V to paste names you don't feel like typing but will use a lot.

Pssst, you're not supposed to know that sort of Meta things...

: Oh no, not the fourth wall....

A-anyway, as you can probably figure out...

Today's girl is:



Chitoge Kirisaki
from
Nisekoi


And I don't have to ask for permission as she's a villain as well!

: Harumph. Who would WANT to be talked about by an idiot like YOU.

: Look, Chitoge is Chitoge-ing it up with her tsundereness.

: Tsundereness? Is that a food? Can I eat it?

I think it's how meat can be prepared.

: That's TENDERness, TENDER.

: Speaking of meat...

*Chitoge picks up a big cartoon meat and starts eating it. Natose gulps, looking very hungry as her mistress eats.*

: J-just a little. Please.

: NO! You have a job to do.

: Didn't she lose to Topaz already? What else would she be able to do?

: Just because she lost doesn't mean that her job is done. Natose! Capture Topaz!

: C-capture? What do you mean?

: Yeah, it's not like he'll be going anywhere while the blog is going on...

I'm too lazy to move too much once I get going.

: No, you all don't understand.

*Chitoge pulls out a glove, the one from last time. She slips it on and it appears to be more of a gauntlet with a crystal on the back of the hand. She holds her hand out towards Natose, as if commanding her.*

: NATOSE! Capture Topaz!

*Natose does just that, though after holding his arms behind his back she seems to realize what's happening.*

: W-what happened? I don't want to hurt or capture my sweet otouto proxy!

: It looks like Chitoge is using that gauntlet of hers to command Natose to do things she wouldn't do!

That must be why she punched me last time!

: That's right. With this Dynasty Gauntlet I'm able to command people to do my bidding! That's why I have so many faithful servants as well!

: So that's why she has so many idiotic fans!

At least it's better than hypnotic breasts...

: Do not dare reference Keijo in front of me!

*Chitoge moves her arm, making Natose pull on Topaz's arms. His back arches, but fortunately it doesn't deal damage.*

I-It wasn't a reference to that! It was one for Milky-Urk-Holmes!

: Here I was thinking that it somehow explained DungxDingle and Senran Krapula's popularity...

It also appeared in Manyuu too. Man, there's a lot of Chitoge-y anime, isn't there...

: Don't use my name as a way to censor swear words!

*Natose pulls on Topaz once again, this time dealing 15 damage.*

AIIIEE!

: My apologies, Topaz! I do not wish to harm you, but Ojousama is leaving me no choice!

Don't worry. I understand what's going on. Though before she can tear my arms out of the socket let us begin the blog!

Head
Hair: Chitoge is about average here, not really being too special to keep me interested. She does have long blonde hair, which I do like more than Zettai, but not enough to improve Chitoge in my eyes either. Her hair is waist-length, and I'm not sure if it covers her ass at times or not. I do like the length, but her hair is still overly pointed out for the color. It seems that almost any character, when meeting Chitoge, points out her hair and it gets really annoying after a few times. The fact that she has long hair also sparks Raku, the male lead, saying that he likes long hair as a child I think. It also may be the reason that Marika cuts her hair in the epilogue, so boo Chitoge causing such issues even if indirectly. Her swept bangs aren't too bad, and I do like how the sides frame her face well. Chitoge also has the occasional variety, with twintails or a small ponytail, but overall she keeps it free which I do like. She does have a hairband ribbon, which she got from her mother and is very protective of. They also make her look like Ichigo from Aikatsu, though I don't think that was intentional for either. Overall Chitoge isn't too bad but the issues with the annoying praise and potentially causing Marika to cut her hair do cause her problems. Oh, and her hair has a little bit of gradient, making the lower tips of her hair look red or purple or another color that isn't blonde so the praise doesn't make a lot of sense either.
Grade: C+

Eyes: Since Chitoge has blonde hair you can probably imagine what color her eyes are. If you said blue, conglaturations-er, I mean... Never mind. Anyway, as expected for being half-American Chitoge has blonde hair and blue eyes. I don't mind the combination as much as Zettai does, but it is overdone. At least the girls in the show have mostly realistic hair/eye colors otherwise. However, that's not to say that I don't have an issue with Chitoge's eyes. They're very circular and tarame, which I'm not a big fan of. They don't even fit her personality either. Chitoge also has many eyelashes, which is a downside. I will also add that Chitoge's eyes were brown as a child, which makes Raku remembering falling in love with a brown eyed girl possible. This is just a cheap retcon for drama, or at least it seems like it to me. It's just really dumb that her eyes changed like that just to cater to the author's mistake. Oh, and one good thing is that Chitoge does wear glasses, at least in the Majikore game and in the magical girl spin-off. I'm not sure if she wears sunglasses or something as part of a disguise though, I don't remember any time but that doesn't mean that there wasn't a moment I'm forgetting. Overall Chitoge is bland and this area is again full of forced catering.
Grade: C+

Face: Chitoge's face still has the nice art that I liked from Tsugumi and Marika's blogs. That said, for some reason Chitoge isn't as cute as those two. Sure she has cute moments but she's not as memorable as those two. Maybe it's because she was so grumpy in the beginning and that stuck with me. I will say that she has a small nose which is pretty good, and despite her personality her smile is gentle and somewhat cute. Still, she's not nearly as beautiful as the characters in the series make her out to be. Overall Chitoge is just basic, not too bad but nothing too special either.
Grade: B

: Harumph. There is no way I am doing this poorly. Score me BETTER!

*Natose pulls against Topaz's body, dealing another 10 damage.*

ARRGH!

: If only there was some way to break that gauntlet...

: Oh ho ho. Nonsense. I was given this gauntlet by Specs herself. As long as I focus on it, you'll never be freed from my grasp!

: Even if she has to go to the bathroom?!

: Why would you even think of that. No, because the gauntlet allows some primal instincts to go through. She'd never actually KILL Topaz, but as long as he's held I'll be able to beat on him at my whim.

This is no time for that kind of act, Chitoge!

: Act?... I didn't mean it like that, you PERV!

Yeah, so? Being perverse isn't a sin.

: Sometimes you do have problems though...

Shhh...

: No matter. What you say has no meaning, especially as I'M the one in charge. Change it or I'll have Natose cause you serious pain!

: That's blackmail!

And not the kind that protects from dark attacks! Wait no, that's just "Dark Mail". Regardless I refuse to deal with people like you who manipulate others to get what they want! I'll keep the scores just as they are!

: Seems you're determined to fail. Go on then, endure Natose's attack!

: Sorry for this, Topaz...

I-It's alright, Oneesama...

*Natose blushes, having been affected by Topaz's otouto attack.*

: Attack! Attack! Why aren't you doing as I say!

: It must be one of Natose's primal instincts to protect Topaz!

: That's right, and I won't let any harm befall you!

: FINE! As long as he's held in place he cannot harm me.

I don't know, I could continue with the blog. Speaking of which...

Body
Build: Chitoge has an alright build. She's 160 cm and weighs 46 kg, growing to 162 cm eventually but still being slightly shorter than Raku at 168-172 cm respectively. Other than that, despite the series trying to praise her more than she deserves, she's got a fairly average figure. She does have a slender stomach despite eating a lot, which is unfortunate. She does have some ass shots, which is surprising and good. There's some bare ones too, which seems odd as that might make Chitoge the “ass girl” of the series. That said, she's still not too interesting. She is very strong and has tsundere-powered punches which is never a good sign. Overall she does alright, but nothing too special (more ass shots might have helped. Even better if they're a better character like Marika's though).
Grade: B

Chest: To be fair, Chitoge isn't the main chest girl in Nisekoi. That happens to the poor Tsugumi, who got a lot of chest jokes and other mamocentric moments for a while there. That said Chitoge is still pretty busty. I'm not sure where she would be among the other girls, as there really isn't a “flat” girl (at least in the main four, I think Haru may be flat) and outside Tsugumi the other three sorta get treated similarly. Still, SHAFT had to go and make sure to show off her chest quite a bit it seems (again not as much as Tsugumi). She also shows her nipples in the magical girl spin-off, but even if they don't look bad I am pretty “meh” on Chitoge anyway.
Grade: C

Clothes: This is definitely Chitoge's best area, as she has a lot of variety. The school uniform isn't too interesting, as it's just a white sailor uniform with a blue collar, blue skirt, and orange necktie. I LIKE neckties and this is a very boring uniform! Though I will say that she spices it up by adding black thighhighs. Chitoge also has a few swimsuits including a bikini and sukumizu, a gym uniform, a yukata, a miko outfit, a Juliet outfit for a play, and a Hitagi cosplay from Bakemonogatari for an April Fools joke (figures that she'd wear the outfit of someone terrible xD). Majikore adds even more, the huge list including things such as a police uniform, a cheerleader, bikini armor, a Homura cosplay (because she needed to step on THOSE toes...), a magical girl, a black and red uniform, a biker outfit, a doctor with glasses and pantyhose, two types of bunnygirls, maid, party dress, princess, elegant dresses, and probably more that I have missed. The game and some of the other normal outfits all make Chitoge's wardrobe her best asset, fitting as it's the most removed from her horrible character.
Grade: A

*Anger veins appear on Chitoge's forehead.*

: My... CLOTHING? That is NOT my best asset!

By my calculations it seems to be. Not that you should be surprised, that's what Zettai liked best from you too.

: ENOUGH! Stop mentioning your friend who cannot see my appeal!

Why not? It's not like I see it either. People are idiots.

: THAT'S IT! This shall be your end!

*Chitoge puts more of her energy into the gauntlet and forces Natose to pin Topaz against the ground.*

: Sorry about this!

Don't worry, I understand that it's not your doing.

: If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself!

*Chitoge, keeping her hand pointed at Natose, gets off her throne. She then starts walking towards the two, continuing to face her as she does so.*

: I'm going to smash Topaz into jam!

Oh no! With her gorilla-like strength that might actually happen!

: Do something!

Kinda busy being pinned down here... Riri! Do something!

: Um er... what can I do...

*Riri looks around in a panic. She sees Chitoge's meal sitting on the table and rushes towards it.*

This is no time for a snack, Riri!

: That's not my intention!

*Ririchiyo then picks up a boned meat and waves it in front of Natose. She releases her grip, her stomach grumbling.*

: Obviously her stomach is the most primal instinct for her right now.

: So what, do you think that you'll be able to beat me without her? How long do you think that it will take Natose to eat as well? Once she's done I'll just command her again!

*Riri waves the meat in front of Natose's nose, and her head sways with the motions.*

: I want that! Please!

: Then GO GET IT!

*Riri throws the meat out the window. It spins as it flies, going a good distance from the castle. However, Natose steps on the windowsill and leaps off, catching the meat in mid air. She has a very pleased face as she eats it. She lands on her feet, but a good distance from the fortress.*

: Well, that's that.

*Topaz gets up, no longer having a butler on him.*

Phew, I'm glad that plan worked.

*Suddenly he falls to the ground.*

: TOPAZ!

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!

*Chitoge giggles, her gauntlet hand still out.*

: Oh? Did I not tell you? I don't have to command Natose. I can command all of YOU too. Using her was just a formality!

N-no...

: We were so close!

: That's right! Now there is nothing that you can do to prevent me from forcing you to give me good grades!

No! I can't be a Chitoge fan! I'm not that dumb!

*Topaz clenches his fist.*

After all the mocking I can't go back on my word... My blogs must remain honorable and honest!

*On Topaz's necklace the Diamond charm that the Berserk twins gave him starts to emit electricity. Though not in any way that harms Topaz.*

I will BREAK THIS!

*As he yells that a loud thunder is heard from outside the castle. Chitoge leaps back, nearly pushing against her throne's table.*

: W-what WAS that?

I don't know, but I'm glad that your fear of thunder is starting to work against you.

: N-no matter. It's not even cloudy out. There's no reason to be afraid, and I'll just command you again!

NO!

*Another thunderbolt is heard outside. This time Chitoge gets back onto her throne.*

: S-stop this!

I'm not the one controlling this, at least as far as I know.

: It must be the diamond earrings the twins were using. It was exposed to their storm-like powers and now you can use them!

Cool. This will come in handy as a lot of terrible girls seem to have “scared of thunder” as a character “flaw”. Like Chitoge.

: Say what you want, but I'll always be more popular than you'd ever be!

I don't care about being popular, I just want my voice to be heard. And if that voice is one of thunder, I shall work with it!

: Sounds like Topaz is starting to continue the blog, so you'd better get comfortable.

==Meanwhile, in another section of the fortress==

*Rio the policewoman finishes beating up a faceless goon. She has a series of their unconscious bodies up the stairs she was going up, and wipes her hands from the battle.*

: That should be the last goon. Now, let's see if this is an entrance into the room Ririchiyo and Topaz have gone into.

*She opens the door as lightning is heard outside.*

: Huh, I didn't think that it was even supposed to rain today. Oh well... Wait, what's this?

*Rio sees a sign on a door that says “Treasury”*

: Today truly is my lucky day! I'll take the money in here and buy some lavish clothes, luxury cars, and expensive meals!

*She opens the unlocked vault door and peeks inside. However, it seems to be empty.*

: What the? Someone already Colonel Violet-ed this place already? Darn it, there goes my dreams! Wait, is that a sparkle over there?

*Rio starts to enter the room, but starts being cautious.*

: The floor looks unstable. I'd better take it slow, or I'll fall into the room below...

*We return back to Topaz as he continues the blog.*

Mind
Personality: First a little background; Chitoge is the daughter of Bee Hive, a powerful gangster unit that exists in America and Japan (She is half-American, as mentioned earlier). However, to keep a war between criminal units from breaking out she has to fake being the girlfriend of Raku, the male lead. That's the main basis of the series, and as it goes on the relationship between the two get closer. The problem is that Chitoge is overly favored and a Mary Sue at times. She's very smart, though I suppose that because she's Half-American it may make sense she speaks both languages but the other subjects just mean that she's annoyingly smart and “perfect”. She gets focused on to the point where she steals chapters from other, more deserving characters (such as pulling Raku away from Kosaki during the test of courage or all the times she took a chapter from Marika). It doesn't help that she's a pretty bland tsundere either. She does get better as it goes on, punching Raku less often. Still, her brute strength is why Chitoge is often called a “gorilla”. I do like strong girls but when it's only used in tsundere ways it seems like a wasted opportunity. Chitoge also has annoying shipping fans, but the more I get involved in shipping wars the more I feel my spirit draining away so let's not get into it. But wait, Chitoge does have flaws! Only they're the ones most common for terrible girls; she can't cook and she's scared of thunder. I wonder what sort of perks those “weaknesses” give to the min-maxing leads. Probably awful fans. She also has mother issues, as her mother is often away for work. Overall she's a bland character whose few good points are overpowered by her crippling tsundere issues and overbearing fans.
Wait, I did forget to talk about her good points. Well, other than having terrible fans, being tsundere in the beginning, and getting pushed into the spotlight too much she's a pretty likable girl. She does like Raku, more than she admits too, and she gets along well with the other girls. She does have a little difficulty in making friends at first, with Raku lending Chitoge his notebooks of information about the class. She's also a big eater as well which is a nice trait to have. She's also voiced by Nao Touyama who I do like as a VA, and like Karen before her Chitoge does have a good grasp on English which makes her voice actress's talent in that work well. Still, this isn't enough to propel Chitoge to a good score, and that's not even comparing her to the better girls in her own series!
Grade: C

Libido: Chitoge is about average, and that's being gracious! She starts out faking the relationship at first, for the purposes of their yakuza families not starting a war, but as expected she grows to love Raku. Because clichés and the obvious solution should definitely happen. Chitoge does win, which is really unfortunate as Marika and Kosaki would be much better victors (but no, we can't have a GOOD character win, though there are more examples of good ones in other series. At least more than I would have expected). Anyway the problem is that Chitoge is extremely overrated by the plot (and fans, but that's another issue...). She basically falls into romantic scenes, shoving the other girls out of the picture and getting fans at the expense of others. Overall she's a basic tsundere lead which I should have expected to win, not because she and Raku fall in love or even have good chemistry but because she's the token harem tsundere lead. And “lead” is saying something as she gets forced into scenes and pushes Kosaki and the others aside (Marika and Kosaki getting the worst of it, I imagine, even if Yui really didn't get too started). She wasn't even that well liked, with the author pretty much having to force her to have more screentime with the intention to make the fans forget about the others. Heck, Kosaki is more aggressive in their love as she tries to confess. Chitoge? She runs off to America after confessing and the others have to go and save her. And even in that arc she got too much screentime. Honestly the more I think about this the worst I'll think of Chitoge, so to get this blog concluded I should probably stop here. Man, she's a terrible lead and likely without the fake relationship maybe Raku would have gotten the girl he actually loved...
Grade: C

Age: Chitoge does pretty good here. She's the age of a typical high school girl, starting the series in her first year which means she's about 15 and ends up 17 at around the end of the series. The ending age is pretty good for me, but overall she gets a good score here. Her birthday is June 7th,
Grade: B+

Total Grades: 63
Average score: 7
Final Grade: B-

And that's the score for the blog!

: WHAT?! That's even lower than what Zettai's score was, and he's usually more harsh on people!

That's because he lets out his emotions more, nothing wrong with that. And the difference is more likely due to your series being finished compared to only mostly-finished like his was.

: It was a bitter, bitter year...

We suffered so much. The crops died and the winters were harsh all because of Chitoge.

: Stop making fun of me!

Hey, you don't want me to use my thunder powers, right?

: You think you have the upper hand, but it's ME with the upper GAUNTLET!

*Chitoge uses her gauntlet's powers to push both Topaz and Riri to the floor.*

W-what? Both of us?

: I may be overcharging the Dynasty Gauntlet, but as long as I keep you pinned long enough to use my full strength it won't matter. Time to say goodbye, Topaz!

Looks like there's no way out of this one. We're pinned to tight to the floor.

: I guess so... So now's the perfect time to tell you. Topaz, I L-lo-

*Suddenly the ceiling caves in over Chitoge, covering her in rubble. Her magical effect no longer works either.*

Wow, that was lucky! Now what were you going to say?

: NOT IMPORTANT (phew, I almost said something I may regret later). But how did that happen?

*A mysterious figure stands up, even if her identity becomes apparent quickly.*

: Acck, that hurt more than I expected. I should have known that the floorboards were weakened, but all this just for one measly coin...

*Rio places it in her pocket.*

: Hey, when did you two get here?

You saved us!

: Wait, does that mean...

*Rio moves off the rubble and finds Chitoge's dizzy face. She gets dug out, though her gauntlet seems to be missing.*

: Wait, is this the legendary yakuza daughter Chitoge?

: That she is, and it was our task to find her as well. We're done with her, so take her away.

But not to Zettai. He's had his fill of this terrible bias woman.

: Of course not. She'll be going to the slammer, as she deserves!

Agreed! Though now how to deal with the door...

*Just as Topaz says that the door is blown open. Natose is on the other side, her fist smoking with power.*

Natose!

: Ah hah hah, I didn't think that I would break it that easily. But looks like you managed to defeat Chitoge!

That's right!

: Who is this? Another accomplice?

: Er...

: She was on our side, helping us to the best of her ability.

Chitoge had a strange magic item which allowed her to manipulate people. It's not Natose's fault.

: You two...

: Fine then. I just needed to catch Chitoge and her goons anyway.

Looks like we have a good ending finally. Now, let's leave this fortress before it explodes.

: This isn't a video game, Topaz...

*The four of them leave, with Natose carrying Chitoge who is handcuffed. They eventually make it outside the fortress.*

Well, looks like it's goodbye.

: I'll drop Chitoge off at jail and then go back to Yume. I'm sure she'll be glad to see me again.

: I wish you the best.

: And I'll lead Natose, even if there's one thing I have to do first...

*Rio and Natose wave as Topaz and Riri remain.*

: That was quite the adventure. So what are we going to do next?

We're going to complete the four-part puzzle. Do the last quarter. Complete the last angle on a square.

: I'm not following.

Let's just say that I don't want to wait long to finish this meal. Now, how about we visit a store? I know of a particular one that specializes in Japanese Sweets...

: You and your sugar intake...

*Riri sighs as the blog ends. However, that isn't the last thing that happens. Up in the wooded area watching over the fortress is a young trap with binoculars.*

: Finally, that gorilla is out of the picture. Now I'll be getting fame as the only Shounen Jump yakuza “daughter” and be remembered far better! This is the best day of my life!

*Hibari raises his arms to stretch and celebrate, but they get a pair of handcuffs put on them.

: WHAT THE?!

: Don't think that I didn't know that you were the son of a yakuza yourself. Come now, off to jail with you.

: The cute girly jail, tee hee?

: No. The burly manly man jail. You know, where a guy like you belongs. I'm sure you'll have many “friends” waiting for you.

: NOOOO!

*Rio then takes Hibari away too.*

Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 26, 7:16 AM | 0 comments
April 19th, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-ninetieth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz is still standing in front of Chitoge, with Ririchiyo by his side. Between the two and the villain is Natose, a powerful foe.*

Welcome back everyone to the blog! To review we were told by a trap to come and defeat Chitoge, who had been bothering us for some time.

: To be fair she's been bothering EVERYONE since her introduction.

: I command you to be quiet! Especially if you're going to be badmouthing me. I'll sic my fans on you!

Not fans with bad taste!

: Hopefully they're too distracted by DungxDumb to fight alongside her.

: Oh ho? But do you not remember? Before you can make it to me you'll have to face Natose!

: I apologize for this.

Do not worry, I understand that you only want to do your job and don't actually dislike me.

: Topaz, stop talking to the filler boss!

: F-filler?

Nonsense! If anything she's a mid-boss!

: Does that mean we'll get an item from her to defeat Chitoge easily?

One can only hope so.

*Natose enters a fighting pose.*

: Do not think that you can get past me that easily. I am a powerful fighter, and I do not think that you have any way to beat me.

: That's true. You might have some skills you took from Rio, but other than that you'd be defenseless!

True, but do remember that Natose said that she would let me do my blog on her first.

: I am interested in what you have to say...

: NATOSE! Do not betray your ojousama! Or your acting one for the time! Defeat Topaz now, before he can weaken your powers!

: But I did promise-

: NOW!

: Man, Chitoge is really being bossy right now...

You mean Chitoge is Chitoge-ing it up again?

: What do you mean by THAT?

Just being a horrible person in general.

: NATOSE! Do not stand there and let them mock me like this! I order you to attack immediately!

: Then I shall make it quick... Try not to resist too much, and I promise that you will not be injured too severely.

*Natose cracks her knuckles as she walks up to Topaz. He tears up cutely at her intimidating figure.*

P-please... Don't hurt me too much...

*Natose blushes slightly at this.*

: W-wha?

: Don't listen to him! He's just trying to make you disobey me!

Sniff... All I wanted to do was talk about you, Natose... But don't worry, I know it isn't your fault.

*Natose blushes even further and hugs Topaz tightly. In a non-sexual way.*

: Oh, Topaz! There's no way that I can deny you any more! Please, talk about your big sister all you want!

: Stop! Do you WANT him to make you weaker?

: Just hearing one or two things can't hurt! Besides, I'm plenty strong enough to beat him even in a weakened state.

Yaaay!

: I'm honestly surprised that you pulled that off...

Never underestimate the power of appealing to a older sister's otoutocom side. And speaking of which, I still need to say that...



: Otoutocom? Is that a food?

: Topaz, please refrain from making jokes.

Wasn't planning on it, so let's get on with the blog!

Head
Hair: Natose has a somewhat good, somewhat bad hair style. First the bad; she has very short hair. She has a bob cut, and the longer sides just barely reach her shoulders. Overall it's a very boy-ish look, which goes well with her reverse trap appearance. I still would have liked it more if her hair was longer, though. The good is that I really like the dark blue color. It's really pretty and fits most of Natose's outfits (which tends to mean her butler outfit). Natose also has somewhat long bangs, especially in the middle and the left over her “eye”. Much better than the other short-and-blue-haired butler that we shouldn't mention...
Grade: B

Eyes: Once again there's a pretty big flaw, which might be obvious just looking at Natose's image. On one hand (likely the right one, even if that joke may be in bad taste) she has a pretty eye. I like the tsurime sharp shape quite a bit, and the blue color works well with her hair. I like it when the hair and eye color match like this, even if it's possible that Natose's eye is a little more purple than her hair. Still, the shininess looks really pretty, and she'd likely do better if it wasn't her flaw. You see, during the events of Natose's life which I'll talk about later a piece of driftwood hit her in the eye. Fortunately I don't think we actually see it, but it is a shame that she lost her left eye. She does wear an eyepatch with a cross on it, with a strap like a pirate, but it does cost her some points.
Grade: B-

Face: Eyepatch aside Natose's face is pretty good. She does seem solemn but with subdued emotions, which I like quite a bit. She has a gentle, calming smile, and when she blushes she looks quite good. Natose does have a visible and sizable nose, but it is also fairly simple and looks like a triangle shape. Overall while not too special I still find Natose fairly pretty (even if the eyepatch hurts a little here too).
Grade: B

: THERE! Is your curiosity satiated? You may defeat Topaz now.

But the blog isn't done yet! I'm only about a third of the way through!

: It's not like you don't know how blogs work, Chitoge. You've been in one already.

: That doesn't mean that I pay attention to Topaz's!

Zettai had the same back then! Though it has changed since.

: I don't care! Natose! Stop pampering the idiot and destroy him!

I'm glad that you said “him” as otherwise I'd reflect that back at YOU. You idiot.

: What did you say...

What? Hard of hearing in addition to being repulsive?

: NATOSE! Stop pampering him and attack!

Please don't listen to the mean lady! I haven't hurt her at all and won't, so please keep me safe.

*Natose's eye becomes a spiral.*

: Aawooo... Torn between my duty and my little brother!

: (Little brother proxy, if even that).

: How can I ever decide!

: I would say that the choice should be obvious.

T-that's right... I know that you'll make the right decision.... Natose-neesama...

*Natose blushes even more from Topaz's intentional cuteness.*

: Oh Topaz, how could I ever think of harming a wondrous little brother like you!

*She hugs Topaz tight, rubbing her face against his. However, she's so excited that Topaz feels a couple of snaps inside his body.*

Too tight-TOO TIGHT!

: Pardon me, then. I'll let you loose!

*Natose frees Topaz, allowing him to pant as he could barely breathe. Ririchiyo looks concerned.*

: You alright, Topaz?

I think that I might have broken a bone or two, but nothing major. I must have just taken like 20 points of damage.

: My apologies.

*She bows cutely.*

: Don't apologize for doing your job, Natose! Now keep breaking him!

: NO! I have to pamper my younger brother more! At least let me listen to a few more things!

: What is this, a battle between a parent and a child that needs to go to sleep?

: NO! Now fight properly like I'm telling you too!

Too late, as I'm already beginning the rest of the blog!

Body
Build: As Natose is from a visual novel we actually have measurements. She's a fairly decent 172 cm tall, which is tall but tall girls are cute and sexy so that only makes her seem better (though sadly at 178 the male lead Ren is still taller). Her three measurements are 88-58-85, meaning her chest is bigger but not by a large amount. Natose's ass does look a little flat, but that might just be in the opening as her bent-over body looks good in the VN (or at least better). Her ass at least gets fondled in a couple of the images, which is nice as that might mean it gets attention. Natose's limbs are pretty nice, and although she's really strong she's not too muscular either. She's also slightly darker-skin, which is fitting as she's not Japanese (she's from one of the more southern islands, like Thailand or the Philippines, though I can't find a precise location).
Grade: B-

Chest: Natose, as mentioned earlier, has a slightly larger chest. Her large chest is probably the biggest reason she isn't usually confused with a guy as well. That said, she's also not the bustiest girl in the series either. She's even tied with Shinra's chest and ass, with the beautiful ojou only being 1 cm smaller in waist (though that may mean her curves are more pronounced due to Natose being 4 cm taller). Regardless Natose isn't terribly mamocentric and doesn't cause too much of a threat. We do see her topless, and she has pretty fair-sized nipples (though they seem to be smaller in the anime). Overall not too bad, could be worse at least.
Grade: B

Clothes: Natose's sense of wardrobe is pretty good, though not as great as say, Shinra and her amazing pantyhose. She does tend to wear a great outfit though, which is her butler outfit (she wears that instead of a maid's outfit as she finds it easier to move around in). The uniform consists of a white shirt, a black vest, black pants, and a blue ribbon around her neck. It looks really beautiful and I'm a big fan of girls in suits (though in this case it's more of a suit-like outfit). There are a few other outfits in the anime, the ones that I found being a blue bikini with shorts (at least if the official art is the same type), a lovely blue elegant dress, a sling swimsuit, a black bunny outfit, and a few casual outfits including some that show off her midriff. I'm not sure if there are any outfits in the VN, but overall she does pretty nice. I will say that some outfits are mamocentric, but her base outfit isn't and that's what she wears (and I like it quite a bit) so Natose does pretty good here.
Grade: B

: I apologize if my large bosom is an issue for your friend. Do note that I am not trying to hug you in any sexual or seductive fashion.

Do not worry. I know that Natose-neesama's intentions are pure and sisterly!

: I would hope it isn't “sisterly” in the way Topaz likes...

Ririchiyo, stop being a pervert. I'm just enjoying spending time with my sister.

: Of course, and I can't wait to spend more!

Well then, you'll be fortunate that we still have a few more areas to go. Then I can finish the blog and give you a final score.

*Without warning Natose punches Topaz in the gut, sending him flying. He rolls across the ground a bit.*

OOF!

: TOPAZ!

: Oh no! Who did this to you!

: This isn't the time for jokes, Natose...

: What do you mean?

I think you were the one to punch me. And dealt almost 40 damage... Oof...

: WHAT? How can that be? I didn't do it at all, so don't blame my little brother's injury on me!

Wait, you weren't in control of your body? How unusual...

*Topaz looks around, but before he looks at Chitoge she manages to remove a glove she was wearing and hide it in the arm of her throne.*

: Maybe Natose is finally obeying her master, like she SHOULD!

Nonsense! Natose-neesama is her own person, and doesn't need to take orders!

: That's right, Topaz! Though do not worry, as Oneesama can fight her own battles. You can just lay here on my legs for the remainder of the blog.

Perhaps that is a good thing. Maybe then the room will stop spinning...

*Topaz rests his head on Natose's legs, as she is sitting in the ground with them to the side. He continues the blog like this.*

Mind
Personality: Natose has a pretty great personality, especially for my tastes. She's a loyal butler to Yume (the youngest of the sisters), while also trying to be her best friend. She is also the chief of security, and is an incredibly strong fighter. The reason behind this is that she's a Muay Thai master and worked as a former bouncer as well. She was adopted by the team as she had lost not only her family but her entire village in a typhoon (and also her eye, in case you were wondering). Since Natose was unable to save her family, especially her younger brother, she has a very strong protective fixation. She works hard to protect Yume, and eventually Ren as a brother stand-in, though it does seem to have consequences in the VN. She leaves with the two, not wanting to put them in danger but ends up putting them in more danger. To be fair, she was obsessing over protecting him that she was neglecting her other duties, and rather than be fired she knocks out the two so that she could remain with them. She realizes this is a mistake and they return, and at the end of the story Natose leaves the mansion to train without knowing when she'll be back. It's a fairly bittersweet ending, from the sounds of it. Anyway, Natose also has some dog-like aspects. She's cute and loyal, but is somewhat gullible and clumsy. She also tends to sleep in late. Natose also enjoys food, with the kitchen banning her from entering as she would eat too much. Her love for food, especially jerky, is so high that she leaps out of the mansion during her anime introduction (which shows both her love of food and amazing strength). Of course, I can't forget who does Natose's voice. It's Yuu Asakawa, one of my favorite VAs. She does such a great oneesan voice, and her lower pitch matches her husky voice pretty well. If you're unfamiliar with the blog you may not know who she is, but she's the voice behind great girls like Rider, Sakaki, Momoyo, and a great deal many others. Natose does have some difficulty with Japanese, as she's not native to there, but sadly I do not know any examples. Natose also has a pretty silly joke in one of the episodes, and even if she has a silly voice that's not her usual one for humorous purposes she still sounds so sexy! Strong girls voiced by Yuu Asakawa are amazing, especially older sister-like ones with a younger brother complex! That said, Natose isn't the main character, being more of a secondary one compared to Ren and the three sisters. Still, Natose is a pretty good character for my tastes.
Grade: B+

Libido: Natose does pretty good here. Not too much in the anime, at least as far as I can remember (I don't remember the series too well, but I think Shinra had most of the shipping scenes). Though even then when the lead Ren acts like a “younger brother” Natose becomes a brocom which works well considering her voice. The visual novel is where Natose gets most of her points here. She does have a route, and the game is an 18+ one so she has sex scenes. Some things include doggystyle and lap riding, which are both pretty good. I've also heard mentioned that she gets aroused when she finds out Ren gets forcibly kissed and interrupted he later tells Natose, gets aroused thinking of it, and she takes care of him after which seems oddly sexy. Still, Natose does pretty well here, especially with her older sisterly brocom side (even if Mihato also appeals to that fetish).
Grade: A-

Age: I am not sure how old Natose is. She seems to be in her late teens to early twenties, but I couldn't find anything concrete. Except that she has a birthday of January 3rd, but I can't be sure of how old she is.
Grade: A-

Total Grades: 75
Average score: 8.3
Final Grade: B

*Topaz gets up, shaking his head with his hand against his forehead.*

And that's the blog for this week. Oof...

: Feeling better, my little brother?

A little bit.

: So is this your stupid “Imprint” ability going off?

: Not at all. It just feels like Topaz is like a younger brother, so I wanted to pamper and protect him. I'm not mind controlled or anything.

: Heh heh heh.

That sounds ominous and foreshadowing...

: Oh? And what do YOU know about foreshadowing? I mean this blog is nothing more than useless filler. That's why it seems you put so little effort into it!

Nonsense! Natose-neesama is worth the effort I put into it, if not more! It's just that some weeks I run out of time and can't put in everything that I want.

: Indeed, that happens when he procrastinates. Which is most weeks, but some are especially bad...

: Do not worry, I still appreciate the score you gave me.

I'm glad you liked it.

: I didn't! And I know exactly why this is! It's all due to your dumb hobby!

W-what hobby is that?

: The one that took up all of your free time!

Er...

: READING MANGA!

Oh phew. I was afraid it was going to be something a lot more incriminating.

: Especially that idiotic knock-off by our spin-off's creator!

What one is that?

: We Never Learn!

Don't say that, Chitoge. I'm sure that you'll learn how terrible you are soon enough...

: That isn't what I mean! I mean that Bokutachi or whatever manga! You spent way too much time reading it!

I didn't spend THAT much time on it! And at least you're not in it!

: That obviously makes it superior.

: HA! You just like it for one particular lead, and that's it!

I like the tanline childhood friend too! I just wish that she wasn't so hated... By fans, the manga at least to where I am isn't hating her too much.

: I hope you don't regret saying that...

Me too. Especially with all the hate childhood friends have gotten lately. Did you hear about Ichigo the childhood friend from Franxx's series getting death threats because she told the popular girl off?

: Despictable. No childhood friend should be treated that poorly. They should be treated properly and not overly hated!

Exactly! I mean I can't remember when a good childhood friend actually one...

: HEY! I was a childhood friend!

That's why I specified “GOOD”. Besides, you're the Kirino of childhood friends.

: W-what?

Kirino from OreImo is to imoutos what you're to childhood friends.

: All these confusing words are making my head spin...

You see, after the terrible imouto Kirino won her harem without any plot and being overly boring people seem to overall start hating imoutos. I mean sure, there was a sudden rush of imouto series but that's no reason to torment the little sisters that are actually worth something. On the other hand, ever since Chitoge won it was like everyone suddenly hated childhood friends. And it's gotten to such a disturbing point that people are sending death threats to VAs!

: I think I understand. It seems that, rather than being a kind ojou like I thought Chitoge is a horrible person!

: Exactly! Will you join us in our battle against this blonde overrated rabbit?

: She's a rabbit too?

No, she just means because of the ribbon.

: Ah, I see...

: So you're betraying me, Natose? How... unfortunate for you...

: What do you mean that for?

: You shall soon see... Next week.

That's right, because next week we shall be talking to the horrible worst harem pick ever-

: Well, ONE of the worst. There's also Chihiro, and Naru, and the aforementioned Kirino, and-

There's more terrible picks than I expected! Man, does every harem that actually ended in the past decade have a terrible pick or something? And those are just ones that I know about too... But do not worry, next week we shall be talking about Chitoge! Wait, do I have to...
Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 19, 7:39 AM | 0 comments
April 12th, 2018
Anime Relations: Burn Up Excess, Burn Up! W
This is the Four-hundredth-eighty-ninth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back to-

: SHH!

*We join Topaz and Riri in the middle of a sting operation, behind enemy lines and inside Kondo's fortress. They seem to have a policewoman beside them, and are going through cobweb-y tunnels.*

Sorry about that, I was just trying to describe to the readers what's going on.

: To be fair even I feel lost. How did we get here again, and why are we with a cop that looks like all her donuts are gathering-

: HEY!

Shhh! We don't want our opponents to know where we are. That's why we're going through these tunnels. So that we can surprise them from behind.

: Like a pincer attack!

Exactly. We'll hit them when they least expect us. Like a Quick Attack from a Mega Pincer against a Breloom.

: I have no idea what that means, but I was told that you two are experts at this sort of work.

: One time we disguised ourselves as one person and snuck through the front door of an enemy's fort. Sadly I don't think that this will work that time.

: That's right. It seems that this Kondo girl has fortified herself deep within this castle. I need to go in deep and extract her for illegal activities. *Sigh* This had better count as overtime...

: Especially with how much muck and spiderwebs we're going through.

Indeed, but stay cheerful girls!

*The two girls look at him in depressed disbelief.*

: How can you be this cheerful in this situation.

It helps to have two wonderful women beside me. That said, perhaps I could do my blog on you, Rio.

: What's a blog?

: He wants to talk about you on the internet.

: That old thing? I have tons of those disks. But I don't see how he'd be able to say anything. It's incredibly slow and people would be bored.

: Well... (No, bad Riri. Don't say that joke).

: I have no idea why people still try to use it. I bet it will never catch on.

If only you knew... But still, would you like me to talk about you?

: I suppose so. It might keep me sane as we go through these tunnels. Just don't talk too loudly.

I'll try not to. And to help out in our travels...

Today's girl is:



Rio Kinezono
from
Burn Up! W


Head
Hair: Rio has fairly pretty hair. It is blond, but with the dark lines and shadows of due to her hair style it looks darker and more interesting than it would be otherwise. She has fairly large bangs, especially with the overhang in the front. The hair on the sides of Rio's head are pretty long and spike out as well. Some even reach her shoulders, and the way it fans out sorta reminds me of a lion's mane. Rio also has a pretty well-known ponytail with a high bump, which reaches about to her mid-back (when down it goes down to her waist or so). Her ponytail is held in by a purple scrunchie which looks cool. Overall Rio has a pretty cool cop-looking hairstyle, which might show how nostalgic her show is. Not that I actually saw it way back when, I think at least. But it just looks quite nice, at least to me. Oh, and she occasionally wears her cop hat which is cute, and at one point she wears twintails which was cute.
Grade: B+

Eyes: Rio does have a very 90's design as far as her eyes go. They're quite big, or at least it seems that way. Rio does have almost triangle-shaped eyes, with a curved point in the center rather than the outer corner. The point is sharp enough that I could see it counting as a tsurime, which I do like. The corners of her eyes are also quite nice, even if she does have long eyelashes (which do look good on her, I'd say). Rio's eyes are also shiny, and the color seems to be a blue or green color (it depends on which series she's in, I'm guessing). I do suppose that the combination is pretty common, though luckily in-series it isn't too common. Though I do wonder if she has some foreign blood in her, like American or British, to explain her blonde hair and blue/green eyes.
One thing that I'm surprised about is that, while not a meganekko, Rio does spend a little bit of time in glasses. She wears her friend Chisato's at one point, teasing the girl a little. They're a nice thick-framed set, which would have been nice had Rio worn them more. She also seems to wear sunglasses in a disguise during Excess, but I don't know much about that. Finally, her battle suit does have goggle-like frames and a big green lens, though her eyes can still be seen. Overall it helps, but Rio's eyes are still somewhat lacking due to the common color.
Grade: B

Face: As said previously, Rio does have a 90's design. Fortunately this doesn't mean that her cheek is too stylized. Her cheeks aren't bad, but they are hidden by her hair due to its length. She does have a fairly strong chin, at least in some image (or it looks that way to me). Occasionally Rio does have a fairly sizable nose, but it's not too distracting in the series itself. There are times when she has silly expressions, as was common back in the day and I like that sort of free-style of emotion. Still, Rio does alright here but not too great.
Grade: B-

*Topaz and the others have found their way through the labyrinth. They emerge in a very fancy castle, being as stealthy as possible.*

: So this is what the blog is like, huh? I suppose that I can't complain. It's been a while since any one has brought up the series.

And if it's digging up older girls this seems to be the year for that.

: Though the one that we met yesterday could have stayed buried forever...

: Eh? Something a problem with her?

Him, actually.

: Ah... I can understand that...

*Rio looks to the side with stylish squinty eyes.*

: Oh yeah, didn't you have to deal with a type of trap once? Well, the obvious crossdresser variety.

The less we talk about things I shouldn't know about the better.

: You've already said so much, and I'm sure that you'll say more things as well. (You're such a good researcher, at least when it comes to things).

Fair. So should I continue the blog or-

: SHHH!

*Rio stops the others from walking forward. There seems to be masked men in suits patrolling the hallways, but the three are behind a doorway.*

: Looks like Kondo somehow heard about your plan and hired some goons!

: Somehow those goons look like they're getting paid better than I am...

This is no time to talk about money. We've got to find a way past them...

: Looks like it's my time to shine!

*Rio transforms into her red and black bodysuit, with a lot of sexy shots. However, she becomes surprised.*

: Hey, wait a minute! What am I doing still in this outfit?

This was all the budget could afford.

: Stop being silly. It's because MAL doesn't have a picture of you in your bodysuit. Don't worry, in canon you're still wearing it.

: Well, at least I can notice the difference. Hopefully I'll fight the same.

I'm sure you will. And it's much better than the girl that Zettai talked to yesterday. She barely has her ONE image. Poor girl deserves far more love.

: What's a “zettai”?

: Topaz's fellow blogging friend.

: I see then. Will I have to look for him?

I doubt it. He's not a big fan of your series.

: For obvious reasons...

: I understand, but enough of this hiding. I transformed and I want to go kick butt!

Fine by me. Do you want us to stay hiding here?

: Sure. And wish me luck too!

Good luck, though I'm sure you don't need it!

: Thanks!

*With that Rio charges at the masked goons. She knocks one out during the charge and starts fighting skillfully.*

Look at her go. I wish that there was some way for us to help her.

: Can't you continue the blog?

Good point, that will make Rio stronger. Hopefully she'll be able to hear it over the combat she's having.

*Rio does a lot of awesome acrobatic flips and even flings a guy over her shoulder into another guy. More goons head towards her as the camera goes to Topaz.*

But we can't wait much longer. Our fans are getting impatient!

: (Fans?)

Let's continue with Rio's blog!

Body
Build: Rio has an issue that I'll describe later, but do know that she has a very voluptuous and curvy body. She's somewhat slender, at least in her arms and waist. Her legs are better, having a bit more meat to them which is nice. She does have a nice ass too, at least during the occasions when it's shown. She does get a good nude ass shot in Excess, among other moments as well and her ass is shaped pretty well. I will note that Rio has an older art style so her hourglass figure is fairly exaggerated. Still, with showing off as as well as she does she gets an alright score here. Measurements might have helped, but sadly I could not find any.
Grade: B-

Chest: That said, Rio does show off her chest most of the time. It's a real issue as she's very busty, though without measurements I can't compare her to the other characters. Still, she's often bouncing around and to the point where the English distributors ADV Films gave the series a “jiggle counter”. We can all agree what a terrible idea that is, and shame on them for promoting that as a feature. Anyway, Rio's chest is only sort of good. She has the problem of “missile breasts” that Misaki from Divergence Eve had (seems some artists from the 90s had that issue, I'm glad that doesn't happen any more). She is also very bouncy and noisy at the same time, which is just distracting as they force a lot of mamocentric service. We do see Rio's chest bare in the OVA, and she does seem to have small nipples but that's only somewhat impressive if you take into account the missile issue I mentioned earlier. Overall Rio has a real problem here, and I suppose that she may have lead to a lot of mamocentric series (even if Burn Up isn't the only series with that issue).
Grade: C+

Clothes: Rio tends to wear one outfit, but has a fair amount of variety. We usually see her in her police uniform which I really like. It's a white shirt with chest pockets, a red tie, a blue vest, a short skirt, thigh-highs, and heels. I'm not a fan of the heels and the fact that the blue vest only serves to make her chest stand out is a problem, but otherwise it looks quite excellent. The white shirt also has a police symbol on the arm. Rio wears bear underwear to show her more innocent side, though I probably would prefer a set not as cutesy. Rio also fights in a great red and black bodysuit which looks really sexy, though they do show her zipping up the deep front probably too often. She also has other various casual outfits, though I can't name them all. Other outfits include a towel, a bunch of ribbons in a bondage-like outfit, a red sailor uniform for a disguise, a red dress with a low cut and black belt, a pink crop top with jacket and short skirt, and a black sling swimsuit-like outfit. As you have probably figured out, the main issue with this variety is that Rio's outfits are very mamocentric. It's a real problem with her design, and even her chest pockets seem to bring more attention to her chest! It's a shame as otherwise she could do so well, but alas... (and with the sling swimsuit and occasional other outfits I cannot make a “or, sadly, NO-ass issue” joke).
Grade: B

: What's all that about?

*Rio returns to where Topaz and Riri were hiding. She's brushing off her hands.*

What do you mean?

: Isn't it obvious? I should charge you for talking about my body like that!

: If Topaz had to pay every girl to talk about them, he'd end up even more broke than he is now!

True true. But I don't get why you're so angry. I only said accurate things.

: Nonsense! I obviously should be much higher!

You'd have to show off your ass more if that was the case. And maybe not be as bouncy in the upper deck either.

: My ass is just fine!

Depends on what you compare it to. There are shows that you're better than-

: Like DootyXDisgusting!

Exactly, while comparing others like Daphne and AIKa you fail hard. Especially as the latter is closer to the time that your show aired, but still both being police-like shows make yours look bad.

: It's funny how older shows were better back then. Even returning classics are better, like Cutey Honey and Lupin III.

Shhh, don't jinx it! We want shows to do well! And I suppose that Rio's isn't exactly the greatest either...

: Whatever. So what sort of things would you want to see if I were to get a better ass score?

Hmmm....



: ...You know what, maybe I'm fine with the score you gave me...

Well, by all means only canon things count. Even if you had fanservice I couldn't include it.

: Not that Topaz wouldn't enjoy it. Though he'd prefer another type of “service”, even if his friends would hate him for it.

: What do you mean?

You don't need to tell her!

: I just mean that he'd rather use your “donut cans”.

: HEY!

RIGHT! She's Japanese, I think. That means that you shouldn't force a localization. Call them rice balls, properly.

: Oh, my mistake. But since she's a cop would that mean anpan would be a more accurate nickname?

: I am so confused...

Naw. We already have Kondo as the opponent. Too many Gintama jokes would just be esoteric.

: Since when has making too many esoteric jokes been an issue with the blog?

Fair point.

: You two! We still have a mission to do. Less talking, more walking!

Oh yeah. We might as well finish up the blog too.

: Considering how the other blogs have gone I'm certain that we'll reach the end at the end of the blog. That's how it always works out.

That it does. Yay, convenience!

Mind
Personality: Rio is the lead girl and the point man (point girl?) of Team Warrior, which is a section of the Neo-Tokyo Police Force. It has nothing to do with other Neo- places, like in better shows though. Anyway, Rio is a policewoman and I really like those (though they aren't as common as they could be). She can be a little clumsy at times, but she is also smart and manipulative but in a good way. Rio does have an issue with being quick to anger, but I blame the guys around her for that as they're very flagrant perverts instead of accidental ones. It also helps out with her battle, as she's a close-combat specialist. This doesn't mean she doesn't use a handgun though. One of Rio's main traits is that she's of the “always broke” type. She has pretty expensive tastes and likes buying pretty things, which means that she's a little spendthrift at times. That said, there's not too much else to say. This series is pretty old so it's hard to find information on it (even Pixiv has almost nothing). Still, while she's a fairly standard action heroine I do enjoy her personality. She's voiced by Yuka Imai, who does a good job with Rio's somewhat rougher style of talking (not due to anything particular reason like dialogue that I've caught, her voice just seems a little rougher than a lot of modern girls). Yuka Imai also seems to do a lot of mature-type characters in magical girl shows, though I'm not too familiar with her voice overall. Oh, and I should mention that despite the name being the same this is just on the Rio that's in W and Excess, the Scramble character is different in both continuity and looks.
Grade: B

Libido: Rio does alright here. She's not afraid to use her sexuality and curvy body to get out of trouble. She's not a fan of the attention she gets from Yuji, the male lead. Not that they don't have their moments (I'm guessing, at least), but he's a really perverse character that, for example, went into the girls' locker room without even a disguise. Still, Rio does kinda get pushed towards him, as they're the two leads. I do like how in the OVA she has a meganekko friend Chisato that Rio seems to flirt with, but considering she dies soon after it's not expanded on. Rio is also the bad kind of poor, as she tries to either sell her underwear (anonymously) and she talks about marrying a rich husband. I'm not a fan of that sort of thing. Overall, despite some good things Rio does have her issues that can't be ignored.
Grade: B-

Age: I'm not sure how old Rio is. It's possible that it's mentioned at some point and I couldn't recall, but with all the research I did I couldn't find a concrete age. I do know that she's a policewoman, and that likely means that she's over 18. She's likely in her 20's or so, but without a sure age I can't give her a better score here.
Grade: A

Total Grades: 71
Average score: 7.9
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for the week. What do you think of it, Rio?

: I'm not sure. It seems alright, maybe.

: I was almost expecting a higher score, especially due to how inspiring you were to Topaz.

: Inspiring? What do you mean...

*Rio glares at Topaz, who looks to the side.*

N-nothing! She just means that you were the inspiration for a personal character, nothing more!

: I suppose that makes sense.

And look, we're at the gated doors already!

: Curse you and your poor writing skills...

Hey, we still need to open them up. Come on, girls help me out here.

: Fine...

: I guess we should help. We do look stronger than you anyway...

*Topaz and the girls, especially them, open the huge door to the throne room. There sits a blond on a chair, facing away from them and with a desk between them.*

That must be Kondo!

*He charges in.*

: Wait! It might be a trap! Though not one like last week!

*Riri charges in behind Topaz, but hits a foot tile. A heavy door falls in the doorway, leaving Rio on the other side. She bangs on the door.*

: You two alright over there?

We seem to be fine.

: See, I knew it was a trap!

: You guys stay put. I'll try to find another way in.

Good plan. I guess we'll confront Kondo while we have the time.

*On the other side Rio looks around and sees many men in suits running towards her.*

: Sheesh. They just keep coming. Oh well, I'll just have to cut through them! I better get overtime for this now!

*Rio leaps into the fray, with an epic freeze frame. Topaz swallows as he heads up to the mysterious woman. Ririchiyo follows him, looking a lot less serious.*

: Are we going to keep hiding who this girl is? It's obviously Chitoge.

Wait, you're saying that Chitoge is a gorilla?

*The girl then spins to face Topaz and Riri, slamming her hands on the desk in front of her.*

: I SAID I'M NOT A GORILLA!

Yeah yeah. I bet you'd do really good in the hardest 1 2 Switch game too...

: Only by the game's own difficulty scale. And what do you know, you're not athletic enough to play that one.

I play other games though. But that's not important! It's time for us to face you, Chitoge! Not just for myself and all the girls you've bothered, but for the terrible ending to your manga!

: Though that's far from the only manga that's ended with the lead picking the worst girl.

: I won fair and square! Besides, isn't it refreshing to have a childhood friend win?

It is, especially these days which is a shame. Then again, when ALL the girls are basically childhood friends that doesn't seem as impressive.

: Marika should have won, or Kosaki!

Speaking of Kosaki I should do her blog sometime. But now that we've finally met you I'll have you pay for all the turmoil you've caused!

: By doing a blog on me? Do you not think that I'd wait for the end of the month, like a good villain?

: Oh no, she knows how blogs work!

: Of course. I already faced Zettai once, and this time I came prepared. I'll just have to send out my reverse trap bodyguard!

Jokes on you, but I already did Tsugumi!

: Then again I'm pretty sure that she'd be able to distract you with her “double barrels”...

: Of course, because you have horrible mamocentric tastes! But don't worry, I happened to borrow a bodyguard from another ojou...

*Chitoge snaps her fingers, and a woman with short hair and eyepatch wearing a suit falls from the ceiling. Ririchiyo looks back and forth.*

: How long were you waiting up there? Don't tell me that Chitoge kept you up there all this time.

Wouldn't put it past her. She's terrible.

: No. She is a good ojou. Not as good as my usual master, but good nonetheless.

: See? I have some good traits!

Sadly they're hidden behind your overpopularity and tsundereness.

: QUIET YOU!

: Oh no, now the gorilla is going to beat her chest to assert dominance!

Fitting considering how terrible she is that she'd bring further attention to her chest.

: SHUT UP! Natose! Teach those two a lesson!

: Of course.

*Natose bows and starts heading towards Topaz.*

W-wait! How about we wait until next week? Then we can talk about how lovely you are.

: L-lovely..?

: Don't listen to his lies! He's just trying to fluster you to drop your guard!

: My lady may dislike it, but I am interested in hearing what you say. I shall allow you to do your blog on me.

That's good to hear. I can only hope that my readers are looking forward to looking at such a lovely eyepatch girl!
Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 12, 7:56 AM | 0 comments
April 5th, 2018
Anime Relations: Stop!! Hibari-kun!
This is the Four-hundredth-eighty-eighth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*Topaz and Ririchiyo begin this blog outside a large fancy house.*

: Well, looks like we've arrived.

Indeed, this is the building that the ugly guy that approached us last week sent us.

: Where did he go? I thought he would be leading us here.

Apparently he had to visit his boss in the hospital.

: Really? I hope that it's nothing serious.

I don't think that it is. He said that it happens all the time, and just because of who we'll be seeing he had an attack.

: Sounds dangerous!

Don't worry about it. It's just a running gag that I should explain from the series before I get further.

: Is that the reason for those white alligators as well?

*Topaz and Ririchiyo look into the moat that surrounds the fancy house. Inside they find many albino alligators.*

That it is. It was a personal joke between him and his editors that when he had writer's block that he'd say that a white alligator ate his story.

: If only it really did. Then we wouldn't have to meet this weeks “girl”.

Oh come on, it can't be worse than the other blog you were in earlier this week.

: That wasn't me! That was my canon self, and Aki is a terrible character. Sheesh, it's times like this that I do want this all to be Nappa's dream.

If only that was true. Though we shouldn't keep avoiding this. Come on, let's go inside!

*Riri and Topaz head inside. Luckily it isn't far to where the blog subject is. They walk into a room with “her” sitting on a throne with a crown and holding a golden goblet.*

: Psst, is that him?

Looks like it.

: But he looks all fancy! What's he doing that he can afford such things?

Illegal things, probably.

: You two DO know that I can hear you over there, right?

*Topaz and Riri jump. They then approach the throne-sitter.*

Sorry about that. We were just discussing your new look.

: I think I look quite wonderful, do you not agree?

*”She” then brushes aside her hair in a dramatic fashion.*

: I got all this when it was found out that I was such a treasure, an inspiration for others!

: What do you mean “inspiration”?

Don't you know who he is?

: I probably do, but I'd rather not. More importantly is that our readers likely have no idea who he is.

: What? There are people who haven't heard about me? Preposterous as I'm the magnum opus! The inspiration for so much!

Well, considering your series aired over THIRTY YEARS ago I can understand it. Not only that but your series is barely subbed! Not that I blame people for being slow with that.

: W-what? That long? Quick, how can I stay relevant?

: Consume laundry detergent and make fake rivalries with fellow video producers?

Don't give him suicidal ideas, Ririchiyo!

: … Fine. (Though I'm more disturbed that people actively DO that...)

A much better solution is to let me blog you.

: Ah yes. I had requested a powerful blogger, and you... well, you'll do I'm guessing.

What do you mean “I'll do”?

: I'll tell you more information. First talk about me on your blog!

Sounds like a good plan. The quicker we get going the faster we'll be done!

: Hopefully, at least.

Anyway, as is tradition we'll be looking at a trap this week. And the topic character will be none other than...

Today's “girl” is:



Hibari Oozora
from
Stop!! Hibari-kun!


: That segue was really sloppy, Topaz.

Let's just say that I don't want to put a lot of effort into this one.

: HEY! You'd better discuss me properly! Or I'll feed you to the white alligators!

Hmmm...

: Don't consider that!

Fine fine, I'm just joking anyway. Besides, I've already done his introduction. I can't stop now.

: I'm really surprised that Hibari is so old. He's like, one of the first traps!

: Like I said, I inspired a lot of great characters. Tee hee.

That is the sad truth. But let's just see how “inspiring” you actually are...

Head
Hair: Hibari has pretty good hair. It's medium-length, extending slightly past his shoulders though I'm not sure if it gets longer or is cut at any point (I do not recall that it is). His hair is blonde as well, though it looks slightly darker in the manga. It's a shame he doesn't have dark blue/brown hair like his three sisters though. Hibari also has long sides which are as long as the rest of his hair, though sadly his ears do still show. I do like his almost-hime cut bangs, having a straight cut though with some gaps in it. I'm not a fan of the variety though, as Hibari does tend to have it up in a side tail on occasion. Overall Hibari's hair isn't too bad, if a little generic now.
Grade: B-

Eyes: As Hibari is from a series way in the past, it's understandable that they eye style would be similar to that type. This means that his eyes are a little more realistic than I'd like. His outer corners aren't even connected! If only just barely, though. Hibari also has a lot of eyelashes on his realistic-style eyes (I'm not sure how to describe the shape other than “they are shaped like eyes” and that would just be redundant). His pupils are also rounded as well, looking sorta bland. To further add on to the mediocrity Hibari's eyes are also blue. Well, at least in the anime as they look more brown in the picture I'm using, but they're clearly blue in the anime. Overall Hibari just doesn't entertain me much here.
Grade: D+

Face: Hibari is quite bland here as well. He might have a small nose, but the placement on the lower side of his face near his mouth and the wide separation between his eyes and mouth may indicate that his nose is actually fairly sizable. His eyes are also smaller in comparison to modern-day shows as well. He does have round cheeks, and the art style does improve as the series continues on but even then Hibari doesn't look too impressive. He also doesn't look too different from the actual girls, which sucks as Hibari is treated like an idol or goddess in the school, having unparalleled beauty. That makes him look even worse, as it makes the bias that much greater. Overall Hibari looks pretty bland.
Grade: C

Body
Build: Hibari does have measurements, though they really shouldn't be necessary. Still, he is 160 cm tall and weighs 48 kg, and his three sizes are 80/60/80. Fortunately for him his sister Tsubame has relatively similar measurements (at 160 cm tall, and three sizes being 80/56/83) so she takes his place for health check-ups. Getting back to Hibari, he is pretty generic here which I suppose could be a sign of the times. Still, his noodle limbs aren't too interesting. Fortunately he doesn't seem to show his backside, at least that I can remember (I could have blocked out those moments). The worst would probably be incidental moments at best. Probably the most appealing thing about Hibari is that he's surprisingly strong, able to beat up about any guy she meets. This inspires the lead Kohsaku to get into boxing and pushes the plot along, but even then Hibari isn't too interesting.
Grade: C

Chest: Hibari understandably has a flat chest. He is a guy, after all. His chest is still 80 cm, as mentioned earlier. As mentioned prior Hibari changes places with Tsubame for the health check-up, which was lucky as the girls in class were beginning to be suspicious that Hibari was a guy (as he goes to school as a girl). In addition, Hibari has a lot of moments of breast envy. This includes wishing his chest was bigger and padding his chest. Granted this was mainly to make the girls not as suspicious, but I'm not a big fan of that sort of thinking.
Grade: D

Clothes: Hibari really doesn't have that many good outfits going for him. He doesn't have a lot of modern-day outfits like maid, instead using really dated outfits like athletic outfits or Japanese reference that I am unable to get. He usually wears a sweatshirt and jeans, even in school as I'm not sure if they have uniforms or not. During the pool episode he does wear a bikini top with baggy shorts, and the title pages usually have Hibari in some sort of outfit (though most aren't too memorable). He also has many other casual outfits, but his wardrobe just looks kinda meh at this point.
Grade: C



Mind
Personality: Hibari isn't too interesting, though I suppose that a lot of characters are like that. He's just the one that I presume to be the first of the “bland trap” type, even if he's not as bad as a lot of recent examples. He's the third child of a yakuza boss and only son. When the lead Kohsaku's mother dies he goes to live at Hibari's family's house. Hibari does get repeatably treated as a pervert by his family, as they're the only ones that know the truth. I don't know if “pervert” is the right term, as I don't know if Hibari gets sexual pleasure out of dressing like a girl or lying to others as he goes to school as a female. I'm not sure what to classify him as, though. Hibari is also a bit of a troll, acting innocent even if something is his fault or teasing the lead. Probably the thing I like most about Hibari is something that I've mentioned before, but it's his strength. Despite looking feminine, he is quite strong and is able to hold himself in a fight. This encourages Kohsaku to join the boxing club and is probably the biggest contribution Hibari has to the plot (besides being considered the “female” lead, I suppose). It's also funny to see him mock or defeat the various trainers his father sends in to try and get him to act more masculine. In all fairness, this is a comedic series and Hibari's name is in the title, so it's not like he got shoved to appeal to trap fans like so many others. That still doesn't help me to like him, especially since he may have had a hand in making traps more popular. I don't know the anime too much, it's not fully subbed and I read the manga instead, but Hibari is voiced by Satomi Majima. She does a pretty good job, and Hibari might be her biggest role. Not her most famous one, as she's done a few on Gundam and some other shows I'm not familiar with. I suppose that's an issue as I haven't heard a lot of her voice, it's mostly in older shows, but she seems to still do a good job with Hibari (all things considered). Overall, between possibly inspiring more traps, being mostly boring yet praised too much, and just general annoyance I might be a little too soft on him in this area.
Grade: C

Libido: Hibari falls for the lead Kohsaku, teasing him quite a bit. This interaction means that he'll sabotage Kohsaku's attempts to get a real girl, and the fact that the two live together means that Hibari has a lot of chances to tease him. Not only that, but the relationship is never resolved as the series ended before any closure. In addition, Hibari gets a lot of praise for being beautiful (as I mentioned in “face”) and has a lot of admirers. These include Kohsaku's friend/classmate Shiina and the gross guy Yakkun, neither of which know about Hibari being a guy (obviously). Between forcing terrible love triangles and getting too much praise Hibari doesn't do well here.
Grade: C

Age: Hibari is 15 years old, and I'm not sure if he gets older or not as the series goes on. His birthday is March third, for a little bit of trivia. This means that she shares her birthday with former villains Hinagiku and Kanon, among others (though the two I named are certainly relevant xD).
Grade: C+

Total Grades: 43
Average score: 4.8
Final Grade: C

And that's the blog for this week!

: W-WHAT?! That's a pathetic score!

Well, you are pretty pathetic yourself.

: Well said, Topaz. There could be hope for yourself someday.

Thank you for that. But I do think that Hibari being one of the first traps and possibly being the original place where the stereotype came from is the main reason I was so hard on him.

: Wow, you must really be maturing to not make a joke there when you said "hard on".

I know. But he doesn't deserve my terrible jokes. Come on, Ririchiyo. Let's get going.

: HALT!

*Topaz and Riri had already started to walk away, but out of curiosity they look back at Hibari. He composes himself, placing his hand against his head and shaking it.*

: I know that you do not care for me, but do you remember why I brought you here?

To have your blog done, right?

: What? No! I brought you here to help me with my enemy.

: Why should we have to fight your battles?

: Our enemies are the same. We're both trying to take down Kondo, though for separate reasons. Now, I know where she is and how to get there. I just need a secret force of highly trained soldiers to go and attack her. With Kondo defeated I shall reign supreme!

: I hope that doesn't mean that she's a trap...

: What? No, I mean in business. Not any personal gain. Besides, I'm FAR better looking than that gorilla.

Debatable. So do you want us to be the soldiers? I think that we can do that.

: Not at all. You seem poorly trained and lazy.

I can't disagree with that.

: You two shall be a distraction, nothing more.

: I hope that doesn't mean that I need to put on a grass skirt and dance the hula.

You're not a Bellossom...

: That was a Lion King joke, Topaz. Anyway, since we're the distraction will we be safe at least?

: What? You want personal safety? You've got to be joking.

I value my life, it's important and my friends like it!

: Fine then. I'll have one of the girls travel with you.

Wait, are all the soldiers women?

: Mostly. They're mercenaries that I hired to assault Kondo's fortress.

: Mercenaries you say. That sounds awful, as I imagine that they'll attack us after their job is done.

: Do not worry. This girl is a policewoman. She shouldn't betray you.

That's just what she wants us to think! But I do appreciate having a third. Plus that will allow me to do my blog in case there's no other girls around.

: Always the practical one, Topaz. So what sort of girl should we keep an eye out for.

: I believe that she is a blonde policewoman that is “Moe”.

Oh, does that mean that she's incredibly cute?

: No, that's not what I mean. How did she describe it again... She's on fire. She's flaming... She's burning up or something.

Huh. I believe that I know who you're talking about.

: You really should have seen her other series first, Topaz.

We don't all have time for everything we want to do *grumblegrumbleMagictheGatheringgrumble*

*Topaz looks to the side and grumbles.*

: H-hey, he's not powering up an attack or something, right? I heard something about gathering up magical energy or something.

: No no. He was just out late playing cards. This led to him not having as much time as he would have liked with the blog.

: Just blame it on the white alligators eating it. That's what my creator would do.

It's just a shame that your blog had to suffer from my grumpiness.

: Personally I believe nothing of much value was lost.

I suppose not. It's a good thing my friends are mostly understanding. At least I hope so.

: I still dislike the score, don't my feelings count for anything?

Only slightly. I apologize for your low score, but there wasn't much you could have done to recover.

: Think of it this way. You did far better than Hime.

Poor Zettai. Or poor Nappa, depending on how the canon goes. Anyway, it was good to see you and plot out this mission with you.

: Be sure to come by any time.

*Hibari blows Topaz a kiss, which he avoids.*

Let's hurry out. We've figured who the girl is, so let's go!

*Riri and Topaz finally rush out.*

: HEY! I don't need this kind of rejection! I'll make myself happier by going to school. At least there I'll be insanely praised like the beauty that I am and deserve!

*We return to Riri and Topaz. They are rushing to the meeting place that Hibari told them about.*

Looks like the camera has returned, Riri.

: But we already did a preview for next time and our farewell. What else is there?

We forgot to say goodbye the viewers, of course! And to say we're sorry for the terrible blog.

: Because Hibari scored poorly or because it's a trap blog and thus awful. (I really should stop mocking Topaz's tastes, but... I'd rather him be with me over some dumb dude.)

A little of both. So I'll do THIS!

*Topaz gets on his hands and knees, facing the camera.*

PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR THIS BLOG! Don't think that its a sign of things to come, and instead come back next time for more from my actual girl blog! See you around, hopefully!
Posted by emperortopaz | Apr 5, 7:33 AM | 0 comments
March 29th, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-eighty-seventh week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*We return to Topaz and Ririchiyo facing down a duo of newly-revealed villains.*

: Like I said, we are Gemini! Together!

: Observation: It seems that they are confused.

: We certainly are!

That's right! Not only haven't we had a double blog for a while, but this is completely confusing! Especially because you're both using the same codename!

: I bet that the other enemies were confused too. I just hope that the readers weren't.

: The others were just too ignorant to realize the appeal of our combined name! They were overpowered by our superior knowledge.

: Snicker: Like you have room to mention "superior knowledge”.

: I'll have you know that I managed to get a C on my last exam, so there!

: Mockery: Yuzuru should be ashamed that you think that's a good score.

: It's still passing!

Quick, while they're arguing we'll escape.

: Don't you still have to do your blog, Topaz? And if you don't do your blog on them now you'll have to chase them down again.

That's true, and I do dislike running. Alright, since you two are here I'll talk about your blog.

: Oh? What's a blog?

: Exasperate: Please explain to Kaguya what a "blog" is.

: Does that mean you know what a blog is, Yuzuru?

It sounds like it. In that case how about you explain things for her.

*Yuzuru looks slightly worried, looking over at Kaguya.*

: Deflect: Yuzuru believes her words would only serve to confuse Kaguya further. It is highly complicated and a genius like myself refuses to lower myself to her level. You should tell her.

: That sounds highly suspicious!

: Indeed. But since you're both likely wondering a blog is Topaz talking on the internet about you two.

I give girls points depending on how well they appeal to me.

: Did you say... points?

That I did.

: Theory: Perhaps we shall use Topaz's blog to break our amount of battles?

: That sounds awesome! Truly it will be a battle that will be very memorable, especially because we'll end this blog once and for all!

: Wait, you two don't know what a blog is but you joined our enemies in order to put a stop to it?

: Honesty: We did it to keep from getting too bored.

: We also have these earrings that make us super powerful! Besides, isn't it about time you talked about how glorious we are? I'm sure that you'd enjoy discussing us thoroughly.

*Kaguya presses up against Topaz, flustering him.*

: Offended: How dare you start rubbing against Topaz in such an unfair and sensuous fashion!

*Yuzuru hugs him from the other side.*

: Pride: Do not worry, Topaz. Yuzuru has more of what you require unlike my bony twin.

: Bony? Just because I don't have lumps of LARD like you doesn't mean that I'm bony! Besides I bet that Topaz likes slender girls, just look at his assistant!

: Pity: Poor Kaguya, being jealous and making excuses to hide her envy.

*The twins start to pull on Topaz's arms, making his eyes become spirals.*

Riri, er, Riri. Do you think that you can help me here?

: Why, you seem to be enjoying it...

Not as much as you'd expect. It's like they're going to rip my arms out of the sockets.

: That would make it difficult for you to... (Don't say "hug me" don't say "hug me" Don't say) Hug me.

What was that?

: (CURSES!) I-I said that it would be difficult for you to do your blog. Come on you two, break it up.

: Do you think that you can really take Topaz for yourself? He's our property now!

: Selfishness: We do not feel like sharing either.

I think that Riri just wants me to be able to write your blog.

: Exactly. You two will never win at the contest if you continue to distract the judge.

: That is a good point! Let's stop!

: Agree: We must allow Topaz to write. Then we can take him for our own.

I'm not sure if I want to be pinned down to one girl like that. Or two girls, as the case may be. I have many more blogs to get done. Speaking of which...

Today's girl(s) are:

&

Yuzuru Yamai
and
Kaguya Yamai
from
Date A Live


: No fair! How come Yuzuru was named first!

I am not sure. I just picked one at random.

: Pride: Perhaps it is because Yuzuru is the one he likes best?

I assure you that's not the reason.

: *mumbleNote that Topaz didn't deny that...*

What was that?

: Nothing that the two girls need to hear.

I see then. Well, since we have a long blog to go through let's begin!

Head
Hair: Kaguya has pretty unique hair, at least as far as hair color goes. You don't see a lot of orange-colored hair, but that doesn't mean that I don't like it. While I do prefer darker colors and dislike reds, the hair color of the twins works well. More specifically Kaguya has pretty good hair too. Her bangs are spiked in a trident-like way, which looks pretty good with the big middle bang. For some reason her hair seems shorter, but it's because her hair is up in a bun in back. I like the cute braid that wraps around her braid too. Kaguya's sides are nice, with cute curls at the bottom while going past her chest. Overall pretty good, even with an odd color.
Grade: B-
Yuzuru's hair is mostly similar to Kaguya's, at least as far as the orange color goes. Their bangs are also similar, and like her twin she has the long drill-like sides. There is a pretty big difference though; instead of a bun Yuzuru has a long braid. Said braid is so long that it goes past her ass, being able to show it off as well. I like longer hair and braids, so between the two girls Yuzuru's hair is my favorite.
Grade: B

Eyes: Kaguya has pretty nice eyes. They have a nice shape, though it is a tareme. I like the ring on her pupil for a little bit of style, as well as the white pupil which works with the art style. Her eyes are blue, which is a little overdone in not only shows in general but Date A Live too. That said, blue and orange contrast with each other naturally, so Kaguya still looks pretty good. Not great, but pretty good.
Grade: B-
The main reason that Kaguya doesn't get higher here is that Yuzuru has something that she doesn't. Due to Yuzuru being a kuudere she has the emotionless thing going for her, making her eyes be in a constant state of half-closed. This makes her have a great tsurime shape that I really like. Oh, and before I forget both Yuzuru and Kaguya have somewhat-noticeable eyebrows (I just now noticed while doing research). Still, both girls are great but Yuzuru's tsurime wins out between them. Shame that Reine doesn't have them wear glasses, but still.
Grade: B

Face: There's not too much to talk about here, so I'll go over both girls at the same time. Both have acorn shaped faces, with a rounded cheek and chin. Both also have small features, namely a nose, which is to my liking as well. I will mention that Kaguya tends to show her emotions easily, while Yuzuru is more calm and deadpan at times. The two balance each other well, and I like both equally.
Grade: B
Grade: B

: Conceit: Ufufu, it seems that Yuzuru is currently in the lead.

: Taking the lead this early is meaningless! I'll pull ahead using my slender body!

Eheheh...

: Don't make dirty jokes, Topaz. You know your readers don't enjoy them.

Fair, I suppose that I'll leave that how it is. But I'm glad that both of you are enjoying the blog.

: Approval: Indeed, Yuzuru enjoys her lead over Kaguya.

: I bet you won't be beating me for much longer!

Now now, I like both of you. Isn't that the most important part?

: Disapproval:
: & : NO!

Fine fine. Then let's continue onward with the blog.



Body
Build: Kaguya has a pretty good body, with the lead Shidou calling her so delicate she could snap if hugged to tightly. She is 157 cm tall and her measurements are 79/56/81. This means that her ass is slightly larger, and her body is quite slender and sexy. She does have a lot of ass shots which is nice, including one where she wiggles her ass in front of the camera in the anime. She also wears buruma in the manga, and I'm not sure if it's just a fold or if you can see her anus due to how tight it is (probably not, I'm probably being too hopeful). Still, her slender and cute body looks great, as does her nice round ass.
Grade: B+
On the other hand Yuzuru has the body of a model (again, Shidou's words). She's 158 cm, though Pixiv does say that she's 155 instead (I'd believe the Japanese Wikipedia though and chalk that up to an error in input on Pixiv's part), making her the taller of the two if only by a small amount. Yuzuru's measurements are 90/61/86, making her bigger than Kaguya in all three sizes. She does seem a little plumper than Kaguya, but Yuzuru isn't too obvious either. She doesn't show her ass nearly as much as her sister, which I hope isn't because Kaguya has smaller breasts. Still, both girls look quite nice.
Grade: B

Chest: As mentioned previously, Kaguya's chest size is 79 cm. This means that she's not especially busty but she's not flat either. She has a middle of the road chest size which isn't too bad. What does hurt Kaguya a little is that she may have some envy of her sister. It's hard to tell if Kaguya is being actually proud of being slender or if she's jealous. Either way she does fairly alright here.
Grade: B-
Yuzuru does have a larger chest than Kaguya, having a size of 90 cm. She's not the bustiest girl (that's Miku at 94, at least from the girls I know about), but she still gets a lot of attention. This means that she does try to seduce Shidou using her chest, which is quite troublesome even if I do like the thought. Though it's not that she puts too much effort into it as she's not quite sure what to do.
Grade: B

Clothes: Kaguya does really well here, having a variety of outfits. I should mention her Astral Dress, which looks like a bondage outfit with long sleeves, shorts, tall boots, and straps for a top. Sadly her ass is covered by a small cape looped onto her belt which is quite unfortunate. She also has a lock on her collar and under her breasts. I'm not a big fan of their Astral Dress, but Kaguya does better with her other outfits. The school uniform seems to be a brown plazer over a white shirt and blue miniskirt which both wears spats under. Other outfits include a towel, a black bikini with white dots, another bikini later on, a purple bikini with side-bows and an X-shaped front, a kimono , a yukata, a school swimsuit, a maid outfit with bow around the neck, and probably numerous casual outfits (I do like that the twins seem to like jeans). In the games Kaguya also wears a rich boy-looking suit though with the buttons and white shirt it does emphasize her chest a bit more than it should. She also wears a succubus outfit with horns and wings, and in the manga she wears a gym uniform with I'm guessing red buruma. During the date in the movie she also wears a great black gothloli-looking outfit with ribbons in her hair to match. Overall Kaguya does really well, and while she could use some better outfits (especially a more supportive Astral Dress) she does pretty well.
Grade: A-
Yuzuru shares a lot of outfits with Kaguya, so I'll only explain the different ones here. I do dislike Yuzuru's Astral Dress more, as on her chest is just a single horizontal strap and the girl probably needs support. She also has a skirt, and her cloak goes from about her shoulders down her back. While Kaguya had a black bikini Yuzuru instead has a white bikini with black dots, and the official bikini image is different (Yuzuru has a blue one with a slight strap around the neck and perhaps a more revealing bottom). Her date outfit with Shidou is a lot more casual too. I also should mention that she wears a T-shirt in the movie when getting into the pool, trying to appeal that way even if I'm not too big into it. Still, with so many good outfits shared between the two Yuzuru does well too.
Grade: B+

: Wahaha! What do you think about that? Now the score is much closer?

: Haughty: If you think that only being one point behind Yuzuru is an improvement there is no wonder you are doing so poorly in school. Yuzuru is still in the lead, and she doubts that you shall beat her in the later areas either.

: Grr, I'll beat you in points if it's the last thing I do!

There's no reason for you to get so aggressive about this. I like both of you girls equally.

: There's no reason to lie, Topaz. I know you have a certain preference.

Shhh, they don't need to know that!

: Are you talking about the twins or your readers?

I mean the twins, I think that my readers can already guess which one is my favorite.

: Did you hear that? Topaz thinks that the readers can see my superior beauty!

: Insult: If you think that your slender body can defeat mine Yuzuru would appreciate an apology. There's no way that my plump body can be worse than yours.

: Do you really think that Topaz will prefer a body of lard like yours? My slender figure is far better!

: Mockery: Yuzuru thinks that the scores will show for themselves.

There is no reason to argue. Now, how about we finish up the blog.

: Of course, I can't wait to rub my superiority in your face!

: Confidence: Yuzuru shall be the one rubbing HER superiority.

: Just get on with the blog!

Good plan, Riri. Let's continue onward!



Mind
Personality: Being twins Kaguya and Yuzuru have a lot in common. They were once one spirit, called Yamai, but split into two separate characters. Somewhat like Kyurem. The two battle to prove that they are the main force of the split, though neither wants to disappear either. This leads to most of their battles ending in draws, with their 100th battle being which one of them seduces Shidou first. Fortunately Shidou manages to seal their powers, allowing them to both stay as separate entities.
Kaguya is the more outspoken and outgoing personality. She's also a little pompous, wanting everyone to see how super-awesome she is, and it's possible that she's a little Chuunibyou as well (though whether that's a creation of the subs or not I'm not sure). Still, even though Kaguya seems a little immature she's still cute. She likes big words to prove how smart she is, though this is all an act as she thinks that this is how spirits are supposed to act. The reason I can imagine the subs giving her a Chuuni speech pattern is because she's voiced by Maaya Uchida who voices both Rikka from Chuunibyou's namesake series and Ranko from Idolmaster. The second season of DAL also came right after the second season of Chuunibyou as well. Still, it does kinda give Kaguya a bit more personality if she were a chuuni. Kaguya seems to enjoy good things (I'm assuming good food) while she dislikes studying.
Yuzuru is the complete opposite of her sister. She's a lot more quiet, though while she may seem emotionless she's incredibly snarky. She frequently points out the mistakes of her twin, usually mocking her in the process even if Yuzuru doesn't know too much more than Kaguya. Yuzuru also announces her speaking point in front of her sentences, much like a robot would. Something like saying “Statement:” and then saying the actual sentence where she makes a statement. This makes her dialogue hard to write, at least for me (though I didn't include that in her score). Also hard is that Yuzuru refers to herself in the third person as well. Still, Yuzuru's quiet nature and deadpan monotone speech I tend to prefer over Kaguya's traits, and they're a lot more unique as well. Yuzuru is voiced by Sarah Emi Bridcut, and while that might sound like the dub name that's the Japanese VA. She also did Yuki from Testament and Yuubari as her biggest roles, meaning that she does kuuderes fairly well. And even if I do prefer Yuzuru I still like Kaguya, and the combination of the two is greater than the sum of their parts.
Grade: B+
Grade: A-

Libido: Neither girl is that great at this area. Not that they dislike perverts (even if they didn't take kindly to Shidou stripping them after sealing their spirit powers. Yuzuru even said that she was unable to be married afterward). In order to try and seduce Shidou Kaguya makes sexy poses while Yuzuru blows a sweet kiss. After initially failing they decide to get advice from other characters. This leads to the girls going on dates in the movie. Kaguya's is quite sweet as she puts a lot of effort into making everything perfect, even using a magazine as a reference during the date itself. On the other hand Yuzuru gets the perverse Origami to help her out, even calling her "Master". I'd say that Yuzuru is a little more perverse as she tries to take Shidou to a love hotel, though nothing happened. They did make sexy sounds during the lotioning portion, and they even crawled into Shidou's bed together, took off their clothes, and stripped him. Overall they aren't bad here, it's just that they lack the clear knowledge of romantic interactions for a little bit. After getting some help they are both great, even a little aggressive but in a good sexy way.
Grade: B-
Grade: B

Age: It is unknown how old the Yamai girls actually are. They're spirits so I'm not sure, but they seem to fit in at high school so they at least have the physical appearance of a teen. That's not too bad, though they could have an actual age that's higher that I just can't find. For whatever reason I tend to see Yuzuru as the older sister and Kaguya as the younger one, but that's just based on their personalities. There's no actual proof I could find about that.
Grade: B
Grade: B

==Kaguya==
Total Grades: 72
Average score: 8
Final Grade: B

==Yuzuru==
Total Grades: 75
Average score: 8.3
Final Grade: B

: Grrr, I cannot believe that this blogger with the mind of a protoplasm is unable to see the power of the darkness in my heart!

: Pride: Oh? So just because Topaz would prefer a quiet girl like Yuzuru over a girl like you there is no reason to insult him.

: Right, at least insult his mamocentric tendencies.

: You will rue the day that you have crossed me, Topaz! With the might of the gems that Kondo has given us I'll prove the strength of darkness I have in my heart!

*The sky above starts to cloud up. Thunder is heard cracking far overhead.*

K-Kaguya, please calm down before you do something you'll regret!

: Agree: Listen to Topaz. Yuzuru won fair and square, so do not think that you can steal him for yourself...

*The wind becomes more violent, as bolts of electricity streak across the sky. Yuzuru looks up to her sister, the twins' blue eyes seeming to glow.*

: Threat: Because if you do, Yuzuru shall be there to stop you.

: W-what's going on!

The Yamai twins are going berserk! Which is pretty fitting, but isn't good for me!

: I will make sure you will appreciate me, even if I have to take you to the realm of adults! Far above the clouds!

Wait, what?

: Kondo told us that we could do whatever we wanted with you, as long as you don't make the blog next time! Now, allow me to take you far away!

: Amusement: To think that you will be the one to take Topaz, you must be more foolish than Yuzuru had thought. You always find a way to surprise her, Kaguya...

: Insult me all you want, Yuzuru. I shall take Topaz!

OOF!

*Kaguya slings Topaz over her shoulder and flies upward into the clouds.*

: Determination: Yuzuru shall be the one that Topaz shall be with. And she is prepared to fight you for this honor!

*Yuzuru pulls on Topaz's arm as the two fly upward. He's caught in a tug-of-war between the two twins.*

Ririchiyo! Help me out here!

: I-I'll try my best, but I'm not sure what to do. I'll just make sure that they don't drop you.

Good, because that's the biggest issue here! Well, it is important but still...

*Ririchiyo enters her demon form, flying and following the duo. Yuzuru and Kaguya outspeed her though, as even with fighting over Topaz they evade the incoming lightning as if it was second nature to them. Riri fortunately doesn't get hit but has to move and weave through the storm.*

: Grr, with this storm going on I can barely see through the clouds!

*The heavy rain and lightning is making it difficult for Ririchiyo to get through. Meanwhile Yuzuru and Kaguya continue to fight over Topaz.*

: Don't you see? I have to teach Topaz the proper type of girl to go after! Meaning a woman of my elegant slenderness!

: Amusement: To think that Topaz would rather be with you than Yuzuru. L-O-L.

L-listen! If you're going to fight over me like this, I'd rather you just put me down!

: What do you know!

: Agreement: You shall be my pet, or Yuzuru suppose that we can share you.

: That's the best idea you've ever had!

*The storm gets stronger and stronger, nearly making a cyclone over the entire city square.*

S-stop! Your powers are going out of control! If you continue at this pace the city will be destroyed!

*Ririchiyo yells from deep below, floating as well as she can.*

: P-please, stop this right now! It's not worth it to take Topaz! Believe me, I know him well!

: You'll never stand in the way of the union between Topaz and us! Our love is eternal!

: Anger: If you think that you can, you are sorely mistaken.

*The two girls hold onto Topaz and raise their free arms, shooting a few bolts of lightning at Ririchiyo. She fortunately avoids, though a famous piece of music starts to play...*

: Thunderbolt and lightning, very very frightening me!

==Meanwhile, in another location==

: S. Figaro.

: S. Figaro?

: The jail cell.

: The jail cell?

: The jail cell in Figaro.

: Magnifico? Oh... OH OH OH OH!

*Returning to Topaz and the others, who are still in the stormy fight.*

I'm just a poor boy. No body loves me!

*Riri raises her voice to make sure the twin spirits can hear him over the storm, even cupping her hands.*

: HE'S JUST A POOR BOY, FROM A POOR FAMILY! SPARE HIM HIS LIFE FROM THIS MONSTROSITY!

Easy come easy go, will you let me go?

*Yuzuru pulls on Topaz, the two girls continuing to fight over him in the storm. Topaz struggles, making some *

: BLASPHEMY: NO! WE WILL NOT LET YOU GO!

: LET HIM GO!

: BLASPHEMY: WE WILL NOT LET YOU GO!

LET ME GO!

: WILL NOT LET YOU GO! NEVER!

LET ME GO!

: NEVER! WILL NOT LET YOU GO!

LET ME GOOOooooo!

*Topaz finally breaks free of Yuzuru and Kaguya's grips. However, as he is high above the ground he starts falling.*

NO!

: No: NO!

: NO!

: NO!

NO! OH MAMA MIA!

*In another location a famous plumber is collecting coins and jumping on a turtle.*

: Mama Mia!

*Back with Topaz.*

Mama mia they let me go!

*As Topaz starts to plummet we cut to a familiar demon, perhaps.*

: BE-EL-ZE-BUB!

*After that short break Topaz finally figures out what to do. He wields his demonic crystal in his hands.*

Has a Devil put aside for me...

*His body starts to glow as he falls.*

For me...

*His body grows the wings, then the claws.*

FOR MEEE!

*As rocking guitars play Topaz in his Mazoku form flies up towards the twins. They look threatened, almost too scared to speak. They instead summon their weapons, with Kaguya and her spear and Yuzuru and her chain.*

So you think you can stone me and spit in my eyeee!

*Yuzuru uses her chain to attack Topaz, but he grabs it and spins her around aggressively. Kaguya then charges with her spear, as flashes of lightning happen in epic ways. However, Topaz has her spear in his talons.*

So you think you can love me and leave me to die! Ooooh baby..

*He smacks the two together and starts falling to the ground.*

Can't do this to me baby! Just gotta get out! Just gotta get outta here!

*Topaz finally lands, slamming the twins into the ground. As he does so two earrings pop out of one of their opposite ear, with Yuzuru taking the left and Kaguya having the right one. The storms die down, and Riri is able to land safely. She returns to normal form, as does Topaz. He pants a few times from how much his body was exerted.*

: I'm not sure what surprises me more. That you were able to defeat the two girls, which you actually liked, the fact that you were able to orchestrate that huge musical number, or that you weren't actually a half-bad singer.

Does that mean that I can be a support bard, like the Macross guy? Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan-MMPH!

*Ririchiyo places her finger against Topaz's mouth.*

: Please don't make me regret my compliment. Besides, that's the wrong Macross.

Fair point. How about we wake up the two girls?

*Topaz and Riri go over to shake the two girls awake. Yuzuru and Kaguya hug each other, cowering from Topaz.*

: Fear: P-please, no more! We were being possessed!

: That's right! Ever since Specs gave us those earrings we haven't seemed to be ourselves! Our power just kept wanting to escape, and I guess we got shrouded by the powers of darkness.

Do not worry. I don't want to fight you anymore.

: Wait, did you know that they were possessed?

I saw it in their eyes. But we're fortunate that I didn't have to knock them out.

: Gratitude: We are glad for that as well. But we also apologize for how we have treated you.

: Indeed. We've been bothering you for the past month or so...

Do not worry. Like all good battles we're friends afterward.

: Indeed. And as good friends we shall give you something to remember us by.

: Trickery: Now close your eyes.

This had better not be something bad.

*Topaz closes his eyes as Yuzuru and Kaguya grab his wrists. They then set one earring each in his hand and he opens his eyes.*

Hmmm, these do look quite fancy but I'm not one for earrings.

: But if you equip both you'll magic will go up by 50%!

Or maybe if you wear one too we'll be able to unite and become one!

: W-wh-what are you talking about?

*Ririchiyo is quite flustered.*

I mean, it's better than the fusion dance at least. But references aside I do appreciate it, but I don't wear earrings.

: Solution: Allow us to aid with that. Hand them back.

*Topaz hands the diamond earrings back to the girls. They bend the hooks into a heart, and the two diamond studs seem to unite. They slip it onto Topaz's necklace, beside the crystal and ruby.*

: There, now you'll have a memoir of us beside your heart.

: Dishearten: It is a shame that we have to leave now, but Yuzuru wishes great victories in your future.

Do not worry. I'm sure that we'll meet again someday. Perhaps in the battle against Specs so that you can get your revenge.

: That would be wonderful! I can't wait to see her plan fail!

: Apology: It is a shame that we do not know more. It was not told to us.

Don't worry, I understand. But good-bye for now!

: I'm sure that Topaz apologizes for beating you up too!

That I do! Sorry for that!

*Yuzuru and Kaguya smile and wave, the former doing so calmly while the latter is using her full arm to wave. They then walk away, leaving Topaz and Riri standing in the street.*

Well, that was quite the active blog for this week. I suppose that it's time to discuss the next blog.

: Are you sure we can't skip it? I mean, that might be a villainous thing to do, but I'm sure that you can skip the next blog.

You're just saying that because it's the trap blog, aren't you?

: Maybe. But who knows what kind of disgusting trap you'll be talking about this time.

I'm not sure myself. If only there was a sign...

*Topaz closes his eyes and crosses his arms nodding.*

: Uh, Topaz....

*He feels a finger poking his shoulder.*

Exactly, just like that. Now I'll turn around and standing there will be a cute-

Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 29, 8:02 AM | 0 comments
March 22nd, 2018
This is the Four-hundredth-eighty-sixth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

*As we begin this blog, Topaz and Raika are standing outside a fairly famous hot spring hotel. Well, those who know older anime at least.*

Well, looks like I'm back here. I never thought that I would return here to do another girl.

: You were here before?

That I was. Though it was many years ago. Well, we can't stay outside all day. Let's go in and meet the girl I'll be talking about this week.

*As Topaz and Raika head up the steps to enter, another party seems to be checking in.*

: Looks like we're all done signing in, Ririchiyo-sama. Shall we head to the hot springs?

: This is no time to rest. You have to take the luggage to the room, then you have to clean it out to make sure it's properly to my tastes.

: As you wish.

: Besides, I'm certainly not going into the hot springs with YOU. You're not getting any free looks today, do I make myself clear?

: Crystal.

*Soushi salutes Riri before heading towards their room. Riri hangs around the desk, being surprised when Topaz enters.*

R-RIRI!

: TOPAZ! W-what are you doing here?!

*Topaz runs up and starts cuddling Ririchiyo. She blushes but accepts it.*

I'm here to talk about a girl. It's wonderful that you're here as well.

: Y-yeah, I guess so. Sorry I haven't been checking in.

Don't worry. All that matters is that you're safe. I'm so glad to see you again.

: D-don't tear up, or you'll make me cry too.. *sniff*

: Such a lovely reunion.

*Riri glares at Raika over Topaz's shoulder.*

: Who is that, Topaz?

That's Raika. She's been helping me with my blogs. Though no assistant could replace you, Riri!

*Raika holds up a peace sign as Riri looks her up and down.*

: This seems highly suspicious. It's like they wanted to split us up on purpose, giving us a much more, er, "engaging partner" to keep us from meeting.

That does sound convenient. So you say you were with someone too?

: Er, that's not important. What's more important is finding that girl!

Good point, Riri! How about it, Raika? Are you going to help us out?

: I'm prepared for the baths.

*Topaz looks at Raika who already has her robe on, and is giving a peace sign.*

How did you get that on so quickly?

: Practice.

: Topaz, don't tell me you did impure things with her...

Errr...

*Riri cutely beats up on Topaz's body.*

: What, so I leave for a little bit and you suddenly have disgusting urges again? I bet Zettai hated your blogs, pointing out your many flaws and mamocentric issues!

It really wasn't that bad... Though I do apologize to him for having to put up with me like that.

: So is that a "no" on the hot springs?

Not right now. We need to find the girl, and knowing what place we're at we'll likely find her in the hot springs and I'd get cut in two for being a pervert.

: Considering the things I imagined happened you might deserve that anyway... (N-no, I can't mock Topaz. I still missed him, and he... my arrhythmia is acting up way more than it ever did with Soushi...)

: Your loss.

*Raika then leaves to go to the hot springs, leaving Topaz and Riri in the central area.*

: So who is the girl who you came here to do?

Motoko.

: What?

*Topaz didn't realize but behind him in the other room was Motoko. She pops her head out when he said her name, causing him to jump and turn his head.*

Oh, she just asked me who I was going to discuss today.

*Motoko comes further out of the room.*

: Discuss? Oh, are you the pervert who was coming here to talk about a girl?

Yes!

: I see you're still proud about being a pervert.

Human sexuality is completely acceptable, Riri. We're not prudes.

: And what makes you think that I'll accept YOU talking about me?

Fair, I suppose that you have no reason to. But I do want to talk about you. I've already done Naru and Mitsune so I figured that I'd do you next. Also it seems that I'm doing girls from classic series with long black hair.

: That doesn't give me a good reason.

The sooner you let me talk about you the sooner I'll leave.

: A better reason.

: Just let him. He'll probably just whine until he gets his way.

*Motoko lets out a sigh.*

: How pathetic, a man pleading to be able to talk about me.

I'll even get on my knees and beg! I don't care about my dignity!

: Topaz! You have to have some pride!

*Topaz gets on all fours, pointing his head in a dogeza pose.*

Please! I beg of you!

*Motoko looks flustered at Topaz's pathetic display.*

: Fine then! You're not only embarrassing yourself, but you're drawing too much attention to me. Get up from groveling, and I'll let you talk about me!

*Topaz gets up.*

Well, that only took a little of my dignity, but I was able to have the opportunity to say...

Today's girl is:



Motoko Aoyama
from
Love Hina


: Wait. This won't be perverse, right?

Don't worry, I'm sure that you won't be having any fanservice.

: That's a relief-wait, what do you mean by "you"-

Too late to explain, let's get going on the blog!

Head
Hair: Motoko has really great hair. She has a lovely hime cut/straight bangs though there are some holes in her bangs. Still, her hair is good enough that I'd count her as having a hime cut. She also has nice long sides, reaching about to her chest or so. Her hair is also fairly long, reaching about to her mid back which is pretty good. Of course we can't forget that Motoko has black hair, and I do like dark colors such as that. She does have a couple of bumps around her temples or so, but nothing too major. She does have a few stray hairs, but considering how antenna-focused the series is I'm not too surprised. Motoko also occasionally has her hair up in the bath, in twintails while trying to be more feminine, or training in a ponytail, adding a bit of variety though I like her free hair more. It just looks so soft and smooth! That said, she does have the issue of giving herself a haircut a good amount into the series. It's a shame as not only does she cut her hair, but it's pretty short. At least Motoko didn't shave her head to be a monk, like Kaolla thought she was doing. Boo haircuts, but go Motoko's hair otherwise!
Grade: A-

Eyes: Motoko has pretty good eyes. They're tarame, but they do have a touch of narrow appeal. I mean that her eyes are narrow, not that the appeal itself is narrow. Anyway, this is most obvious in the outer corners of her eyes, which look quite good with the acute angle. Motoko isn't Mitsune, so she doesn't have the eyes-shut look, but I do still like the shape of Motoko's eyes. They are lemon-shaped or so, with no lines on the bottom it seems. Her eyes are a grey or black color, it depends on the light on her I think but I'm bad with color. I'm not sure if Motoko wears glasses in the main series, but if she did it would be a fairly minor moment. I have seen a picture of her in a suit with glasses with tinted lens from the anime, and a profile in the after-series reference book does show she wears a rectangular pair (though it also states that she doesn't actually need them).
Grade: B

Face: Motoko has a fairly simple face, but it isn't too bad. Especially compared to some other 90s shows (not that they were bad, but some were very stylized). Anyway she does have a small nose and mouth, which I do like. Motoko does have a bit of Akamatsu generic face syndrome, at least from what I can tell. At least Love Hina doesn't have a big cast so it isn't as noticeable, but it is an issue I should bring up. Still, she doesn't look bad.
Grade: B-

: Is that all? It isn't too bad right now...

: Just wait. He hasn't talked about your body yet.

*Motoko doesn't even take a breath before threatening Topaz's neck with a sword.*

H-hey, that's pretty sharp!

: Certainly, as I keep it in top shape. Care to test it out?

I'd prefer not to, as I don't like a close shave!

: Sure you do, as that means you can wait longer to shave the next time. But that certainly doesn't mean I want you to get your head cut off either. Please put your sword down, Motoko.

*Motoko reluctantly lowers her blade.*

: Alright, but you'd better not have anything fanservicy planned!

Don't worry. I'll only talk about the bare minimum or so.

: I guess, since it's for information purposes.

: Somehow I imagine that only means that Topaz is planning something else...

Don't be silly, Riri. I'd never do something like that.

*Meanwhile the camera takes a short break and checks in on Raika in the hot springs. She's laying against the side of the spring, with a towel on her head. Her chest is pressed against the wall, out of sight, and her lower half seems to be floating. Her fat meaty ass and thick legs are also floating, looking like delicious meaty islands. Water flows through her crack, as it's partially underwater, and the camera makes sure to get every beautiful detail of her buoyant ass.*

: Ahhh...

*She has a face of utter bliss as she relaxes, her ass also very relaxed and still floating. However, a familiar face enters the spring.*

Zettai: I can't believe that Katja and Chiaki didn't want to come on this vacation with me. Or the sexy half-elf Emilia either.

: (monotone) Ah!

Zettai: WHOOA!

*Raika stands up in the springs, holding her towel over her front. Her huge meaty ass is completely exposed, allowing Zettai a great sight.*

: What are you doing here?

Zettai: I-I just wanted a relaxing bath.

: Would you like me to help you "relax"? Topaz has taught me many methods.

Zettai: Somehow I doubt that your methods would please me.

: Are you sure?

*Raika asks that as she bounces her fat ass with her hand. Zettai swallows and approaches.*

Zettai: M-maybe not...

: Go on, feel my fat ass.

*Zettai leans in, mesmerized by her beautiful flabby cheeks. He places his hand on her cheek, her buttflab enveloping his hand.*

Zettai: So soft, and huge!

*Raika nods.*

: Certainly. Now how about I help you relax...

*Raika then pushes Zettai down so that he's seated in the spring. Her fat ass is on his lap, making him struggle but her heavy adult body means his efforts are useless.*

Zettai: AH AHH! This feels so good!

: I am glad that you're enjoying it. But do not think that this is all I can do. Here, enjoy this as well!

*Raika then starts fondling her fat ass with her hands, squeezing Zettai tight. Presumably as all this is happening underwater, but that only makes her ass slick and more pleasurable.*

Zettai: AH AHHH! YOUR FAT ASS FEELS SO GOOD!

: I agree. Your thrusts are quite enjoyable as well. Ah AHH!

*Raika starts riding against Zettai's body, making it harder for him to endure. Her fat ass splashes in the water, and it certainly has effect.*

Zettai: AHH! I-I can't endure any longer! I-I'm going...

: Topaz told me about you Zettai, and how you have longed to feel my fat ass.

Zettai: I-I should apologize to him-AHH! Please, don't deny me!

: Do not worry, as he told me the ultimate pleasure for you.

Zettai: Y-you mean-

: That's right-uurrrggh... aaahhh AHH!

PPPPPBBBBBBRRRRFFFFTTTT-BBBBBWWWBBBWWUUUUBBBLL

*Raika farts loudly, even if it's muffled by the water. Zettai feels very relieved, likely climaxing even if his lower half isn't seen. However, Raika continues to rub on his sensitive body.*

Zettai: H-hey, you don't have to do this. Not that I'm complaining, but I'm still-oooh! A little sensitive...

: I shall make sure you're completely relaxed, so just leave it to me-AHH!

*Raika continues to please Zettai as we continue with the blog.*

Body
Build: Motoko has some nice measurements, at least if I could find some consistent numbers. She starts out at 173 cm and grows to 175 cm, which is quite nice. She's a little concerned about this as the male lead Keitaro is only 171 cm (at least until he grows a little). I find this aspect of her quite cute, especially as I like taller girls. The book I have states that her three sizes in the beginning are 84/59/82 but another source (which may be fictitious) states that her three sizes are 86/58/84 while a later chapter says that she's 90/58/86. Like I said I have no proof for the second set, while a book says the former and that's what I'll believe for now. Still, it is unfortunate that her chest is larger than her ass even if the amount isn't too much. Though it could of course use a bit more meat on it, as she's a pretty slender girl. Motoko at least shows off her ass a bit, and she has some nice legs as well. Sadly her body isn't too extraordinary, but she's still pretty nice overall. She's also pretty strong, especially with her kendo skills.
Grade: B

Chest: As mentioned prior, Motoko does have a larger chest than ass. Fortunately this doesn't mean that she gets a lot of chest service pushed on her (there are other girls for that, like Mutsumi). She does still get some chest moments, especially when she gets concerned that they'll get in her way during her training and swordplay. Fortunately I don't remember anything too awful other than that, though that may just be due to how long it's been.
Grade: B-

Clothes: Motoko has a fairly wide wardrobe. At the dorm she's usually seen wearing her kendo outfit which consists of a white shirt and red hakama (I'm sure the shirt has a better name, but I couldn't find it). Other outfits include a towel, a school swimsuit, a red bunny outfit, a dark blue sailor uniform with short skirt, a nun outfit, a fast food worker's outfit, a samurai outfit, and likely a lot of casual outfits. She also wears a suit in the anime, judging by the image I saw, and she wears the samurai combination of sarashi and fundoshi for underwear. She also wears a frilly outfit for a date. Overall she has a strong showing but it would have been nice if she wore some of those outfits more than one time.
Grade: B

: Hmmm, not exactly great, but I do not mind what you had to say about me. Be grateful I'm so generous.

Oh, I am!

: Good to hear you're acting better now. I just hope that you didn't go too crazy when I wasn't around.

It was pretty bad. I felt my mind falling apart and Raika didn't help.

: I'm sure that Zettai has enjoyed what you've given him.

Same here.

: What are you two talking about?

Nothing too important...

*Meanwhile, back with Raika and Zettai. We see the two giggling and Raika bouncing her fat ass on his lap. Suddenly there are footsteps.*

: Others are going to be using this hot springs!

Zettai: Oh no! I'll be caught and publicly humiliated! And not in the sexy way a girl would do!

: Only one solution!

*Raika pushes Zettai underwater and sits on his face. He struggles his view completely covered by her gigantic ass.*

: Stay still!

*Multiple old women enter the hot spring, nodding to Raika. Fortunately none of them come close enough to her as to find out about Zettai who is hiding underwater.*

Zettai: BLUURBL!

: Shhh!

Zettai: Blllurrrpp...

: What's that? Ah, you must want air. Do not worry, as I have plenty!

PPBBBBLLUURRRBBLL-BBBWWEEERRRBBBLLL

*The old women scoot away from the freely-farting Raika. Her gas gives Zettai the air he needs to survive underwater, but he has to keep his body still even if he wants to thrust and even climax. She keeps farting without shame, each one making Zettai's body tremble with pleasure. He climaxes as well, though again the women are so into their conversation that they don't notice. This works out fine, but Raika is forced to wait an hour for the women to leave. In the meantime we return to Topaz for the conclusion for the blog.*

Mind
Personality: Motoko was my first experience with the honor blade type of character, and as a result she is somewhat strong in my heart. I really like that archetype, but I would guess that Motoko isn't the only reason nor the main reason. Still, I should at least describe her and not just her character type. Motoko herself is stubborn, strong, and stoic. She does have some minor urges to be more feminine, thinking cute outfits don't suit her due to her height. She also becomes more masculine and serious after her sister, who Motoko looked up to, married and stopped being the heir to the dojo. Motoko is the heir to the Shinmei-ryu School, which is also referenced in Negima (another work by the same author) and if you're a fan of the blog you'd remember that it's Setsuna's style as well. She's quite serious and doesn't tolerate perversion, though she starts to respect Keitaro once he's matured a little. He's not the only one that grows, as Motoko herself grows up emotionally as well. She becomes a lot looser and more relaxed, but she still has aspects of her previous personality so it's not like she changed into a completely different person. Motoko also mocks Keitaro for not getting into Tokyo U, which becomes ironic when she herself fails to get in the first time too. She also is a cute cryer as well, which helps a bit too. Overall she's certainly a better tsundere than Naru, though that's not too difficult to do. One aspect that I can't forget is that Motoko is voiced by one of my favorite VAs-Yuu Asakawa. She usually gives characters a lovely mature/older sister sounding voice (look at Medusa from FSN as an example). Her voice isn't as deep/sultry as that type of character, sadly, but it's still quite nice. Much better than the English dub who gives her a voice like Izumi/Izzy from the original Digimon and nearly ruined Motoko for me...
Grade: B-

Libido: Motoko's libido starts out pretty poorly. She dislikes perverts and is one of the two girls who cause the most unfair retribution against Keitaro. That said she does start to fall for him, and with a reasonable questioning of how she fell in love. It ends up likely being better than how he and Naru got together, at least for me. Still, Motoko seems alright with unrequited love and will take Keitaro for herself if she steps out of line. She also writes naughty stories it seems, with the English version almost making her sound like a yandere though that's just a translation issue I imagine. Oh, and Motoko does have a reason to avoid perversion; She dislikes guys as she had a traumatic event where she walked in on her sister and her sister's husband in an intimate moment. It's also why she's afraid of turtles, as the head of the turtle looks like the head of... something else. This dislike of men also causes Kanako to try to seduce her as Naru, but other than that the two don't seem to have much of a pairing.
Grade: C+

Age: Motoko is only 15 when the series begins, with her birth date being December 1st 1982. It seems really odd that she's older than I am, but I suppose that happens when they give a year. Anyway, overall she doesn't do too bad here. As the series goes on she ages, being 18 in chapter 89 and 22 near the end of the series. I didn't realize she aged that much through the print, I just thought that there was the time skip before the last two chapters! That's quite good for my tastes, but I believe it's probably better if I use the age she's seen more as.
Grade: B+

Total Grades: 70
Average score: 7.8
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for the week. How did you enjoy it, Motoko?

: I suppose that it was fine.

: Didn't she get lower than Naru?

The first year of my blog made absolutely no sense. She'd probably get much lower now.

: I suppose that is acceptable. Now, that the blog is over how about you two leave.

*Topaz takes Riri's hand, which flusters the assistant. Moreso as he doesn't realize what he's doing.*

That's a good plan. I'm sure that we have an enemy that we need to deal with.

: You still haven't beaten up on Gemini? What have you been doing without me around? ...Never mind, I don't want to know.

True, maybe now we can get on with the plot without excess sideplots-

: RIRICHIYO!

*As the two start leaving with their hands entwined, Soushi interrupts them.*

Soushi!

: W-what are you still doing here?

: I came to get you. Come now, why don't you forget about this idiot and come with me?

*Topaz gets between Soushi and Riri.*

Can't you see she doesn't want to go with you? I'll protect her from troublemakers like YOU!

: You couldn't protect anyone with your feeble powers. Ririchiyo is a delicate flower, and not meant for savages that shorten her name unfairly!

: I-I really don't mind, you know...

See? She doesn't mind being called Riri. Now, why don't you go back to your series?

: Oh, I'll go back-And I'm taking Ririchiyo with me!

*Soushi lunges for Riri, but is met by Motoko's blade.*

: It sounds like the one called Riri is caught in a deadly love triangle. There's only one solution. You two must duel.

: It's time to D-D-D-DUEL!

*Topaz snickers while the other two don't understand. Riri lets out a sigh.*

It's alright, I'm sure that the readers will appreciate the joke!

: *sarcastically.* Thanks, I suppose.

: Now, how about we go up on the roof to battle. It's more cinematic and I don't want the decorations in her to be destroyed.

Fair.

*The four of them go up to the roof. The wind blows dramatically as Soushi and Topaz stand on opposite sides. Riri is over by Motoko.*

: Now, this shall be a clean fight. No deadly blows or other similar things. Just try your hardest and the winner shall receive Riri.

: Wait, I'm not some sort of prize!

: Fair, but if you could decide we wouldn't have to have this battle. Now, are you ready?

I am!

*Soushi becomes his foxy version.*

: That I am.

Wait, I think that this may be unfair now...

: Too late for that. Now, FIGHT!

*Topaz is a little awkward, nearly slipping off the roof as Soushi charges him. The fox demon's attacks are fast and powerful, and it takes Topaz everything he has to not be pushed off the building flying. Riri looks concerned.*

: This seems too drastic! Topaz is a weak person and Soushi is a demon! This is highly unfair and-

: Do you think that Topaz cannot win?

: It's not that, I just would rather-

: You'd rather Topaz have the advantage?

: T-that's not what I said!

*Motoko smiles as Ririchiyo flusters.*

: It looks like you've already made a decision.

: N-no, I-I-I-

: Do not worry. I came prepared for such a situation. TOPAZ!

*Topaz tries to turn to Motoko, but Soushi's attacks from all around are getting to him. He's likely to have taken 75 points of damage just from Soushi's multitude of attacks.*

Y-yes?

: Take THIS!

*Motoko tosses a sword to Topaz. He hugs it tight as Soushi doesn't let up, dealing another 50 points of damage.*

: Come on, Topaz! Attack back! Show me the love you have for Riri surpasses mine! Then again I doubt you REALLY love her as much as I do!

D-don't question my love for Riri! GWAAAH!

*Topaz gets infused with glowing purple energy. He then starts slashing Soushi back, blocking his blows at the same time.*

: H-how did you become so powerful so quickly?

I must have used my mimicry to copy Motoko's swordsmanship. This is perfect!

*Topaz slashes many more times, pushing Soushi back. However, for some reason he seems to be dripping blood from his palm.*

: Heh, it looks like my demon-slaying holy sword really gave him the power he needed to prove his love. See? All he needed was a little push and he'll win your affection.

: Y-you said holy sword, right?

: Yeah, why?

*Topaz's sword is enveloped in a deep blackness, as is his arm. It seems to be eating him, with almost 100 hp being drained and his health lowering quickly.*

: OH NO! That must be the cursed blade Hina! It's draining the life out of Topaz's weak body, even if he's winning!

: Topaz, stop! You don't have to kill yourself to prove your love! I-I want you to survive!

: R-Ririchiyo...

Don't interfere, Riri! I have to k-kill him, no-I-I can't ! Please, help me!

*The sword continues to control Topaz's attacks, hitting Soushi in some brutal spots. Soon he's too damaged to continue, on his back with his arm out.*

: P-please, no more! I surrender! Just promise that you'll take care of Ririchiyo, and I'll leave her alone for good!

That solution isn't the best. I'll slay you and prove my love! LOVE LOVE LOVE!

: We have to do something! Topaz has gone full yandere! And not the good kind!

: There's nothing that we can do. He's going to self-destruct wielding that cursed blade.

And for that, I strike at your heart!

*Topaz, who has likely taken another 100 damage as his blood stains the hilt red, holds the cursed blade in both hands. He then raises his arms, as if to plunge the sword down. He starts making the motion to stab Soushi...*

???: STOP IT THIS INSTANT!

*An extremely familiar voice is heard, as the lower half of a woman's voice is shown on the camera.*

Posted by emperortopaz | Mar 22, 7:39 AM | 0 comments