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Happy Birthday!

Hmm, that's a good question. I guess normal love is too boring for modern tastes so we turn to hyped up, psychotic, and diseased yandere love for entertainment. It might also be the drive within us to know the meaning of true love as a society. Love is ultimately a selfish emotion where the lover wishes to wholly possess the entirety of that which is loved. When love is mutual that relationship works out well, but when it is one-sided and the lover is driven to the limits of their mental capacity then their actions attain a level of esoteric enlightenment that all humans strive to emulate. The attraction of yandere may inherently lie in this esoteric plane.

Nice try, but how many jobs do you think actively seek out skills like "dual-hand propeller dexterity" and "secretes sea slime while moving"? It's tough being a sea slug in modern society.

Just hit whatever target happens to arouse you. I'm not going to inquire about your sexual preferences. I can provide various peasants if you decide to swing that way.

Since resolving these matters in a violent manner generally means hiring an assassin, lawsuits are going to cost you money either way. It's a lose-lose situation. Remind me again why we keep such troublesome institutions around.

Is it really considered 'outside' when the npcs are all restricted to a limited zone within the boundaries of school and dormitories? One could even make the case that the world does not have real sunlight. Now, when you know such depressing information, wouldn't you feel like staying inside for gym?

Osai girls and boys!!

Damnit, that's what they all say when really the employers will never give you a second glance. From now until the end of time they will have the status of 'not accepting applications' as far as you're concerned. I'll just go somewhere else where my lethal propeller skills are better appreciated.

I'll wager two peasants' souls that you can't make a .45 caliber hole.

Just doing my part to help with the political red tape. The more labor lawsuits we can avoid the better.

Wasn't the graduation held in the gymnasium? I think that part of the school would see plenty of use.
Nah, you're better off not knowing how everyone ended up. I mean, think about it. That place was a collection of lost souls who were ravaged by despair in their own lives and felt a sense of longing or regret that led them to seek satisfaction in this program-world. We saw how remarkably bleak Yui's future was and we know the fate Otonashi is consigned to. Any OVA about where these people end up would have to take on a depressing tone by its very nature. That's not really the best way to wrap up a series.

Damn, I was hoping to be elevated to the status of trained sea slug. I guess I'll have to settle for mysterious propeller assassin.

Well, the male ejaculation has been known to reach rather astounding velocities, but I think a .45 caliber hole is boasting a bit too far.

Nah, I don't think you'll have to reform the training of overseers since the LF labor force is essentially the same in all but name to slaves. It just adds a more flowery (yet unreliable) connotation to the mix.

Oh really? I thought the NPCs were disappearing as well since they were no longer necessary. There weren't any NPCs in sight near the graduation ceremony. The school seemed like a ghost town. Maybe they'll expand on that in the sequel and make Angel Beats into a western showdown. Otonashi will be the barkeep, Yuri will lead a gang of rowdy desperados, and TK will be everyone's favorite vigilante. Kanade will be but a passing tumbleweed, rolling off into the sunset (granted that the prevailing winds allow her such).

Are you calling me a trained sea slug?

I see. You want to return the "favor" using your mouth. Hey, what!? What are you planning on doing to me?

Oh, we don't call them slaves anymore. We call them "liberation-free". They are free from freedom you see. One can never have too much LF labor. It makes rebuilding a space armada that much cheaper.

It was moving. I was a bit dismayed at the sudden disappearance of 80% of the cast between episodes 12 and 13, but I suppose it was worth it to have a more concentrated effect on the graduation scene. But, did you notice the children playing soccer?

Have I? Are you certain that I have broken a trope? Did it never cross your mind that I may be incapable of effective social interaction and am only using a self-projected social program that makes you think that I am communicating with you, when really I am operating on a series of basic commands that even a trained sea slug could follow?

Sir, I throw my glove at you. This is a challenge to a duel. We will stand back to back, take 10 steps and then commence the killing. But of course you are given only one bullet, so aim carefully lest you lose your life my good sir.

Who needs textbooks when you have the power of the dark crucible of knowledge? The shadowy pages of untold mysteries shroud themselves in the enveloping faint glow of imperceptible knowledge. I'm still working on battle preparations for my space fleet however, as the pulse guns have not yet been fully outfitted. Also, our capital has sustained a massive hull breach from the last battle, and repairs are slow.

How did you enjoy the end of Angel Beats?

Ha! I gladly welcome whatever 'torment' you think to give me. I have hardened my body under the strain of years of mind-numbing labor and have focused my mind to attain the "void".

I think the tongue piercing will make a fine accessory. This is a big chance to use the inflamed tongue as an excuse to speak with a lisp or pick up an unusual accent. Yes, it should go along well with the holes I'll be putting in place of your fingernails.

Ready or not, I have only a week left. I've moved back on campus and now wait for the chimes of the clock. How are your battle preparations for University life commencing?

You intend to torment me forever? Is that it? Just one eternity? That's nothing compared to the eternities of suffering I spent back on the frontier.

Higurashi really succeeded in making the characters likeable before killing that off. Oh, and you might not want to eat that ohagi- Ah, well now you can easily get a tongue piercing.

Damn inside jokes. You pique my interest and then crush any hope I had of ever figuring them out. Not to mention the fact that you feel ostracized because you're not in on the joke.

I have embarked on a personal quest to find them. No matter what mountains I must scale, rivers I must wade, or dinosaur-slaying meteors I must dodge, I will prevail! Question. Are these tracks music, or drama cd type audio?

Nonsense. You can fill all the major food groups by eating salt, grog, and human flesh. If you're feeling low on iron, try drinking some blood as well. That's the secret to a healthy body; any model will tell you.

Next season does look good, with a second season of Index, To Love-Ru, and Sora no Otoshimono. Plus other shows.
Oh snap! The first 3 minutes was all it took to hook me on Higurashi. How about you? I suppose the whole bludgeoned-to-death-with-spoilers-by-Oot damaged your brain enough to be uncertain about it? Go and watch episode 2 now! The less delay between episodes, the more impact they have.

Mocassins? Was it a Native American sniper? That would be quite the tale. A native sniper armed with a blow dart firing from atop a waterfall with the roar of grizzlies in the background. Well, just be sure to pay your renumeration.

Now I'm curious. Would you happen to know where he found such a track?

Everything in moderation my friend. Make a balanced diet out of soy, salt, and grog.

SYD has more innuendos than I can count. Plus it has gravure pool shots.
Highschool of the Dead is getting intense. If nothing else, the mindless violence and fanservice are winning me over.

Ah! It's been a while, hasn't it? How has the assassin training been coming along? Have you killed anyone important? Ah, I guess you wouldn't be able to reveal that kind of information anyways. At least tell me, did you kill anyone with cool shoes?

Do they even make specialized Yandere Audio Tracks? A company could probably make a killing by selling something like that. Maybe make a trance version and a few remixes. They could even have a promotional event where you can get stabbed for free by the voice actress. Yeah, that'd be great.

I think soy is a magical cure-all ingredient. Just add a bit of soy and whatever dish you have is ready to be served. Of course, the same could be said about salt.

Seitokai Yakuindomo. I see you've been watching it, pera pera. It has an abundance of lolis and russian coloring books.

No, in your case death will be brought to you by the shinigami that has watched over you for so long. Of course, that's just the price you had always been prepared to pay. Everyone has fear that their subordinates' mistakes will have lasting consequences for themselves, but to distance yourself from others entirely is just extreme. Without faith in your subordinates you will never rise above paranoia and eventually succumb to the bureaucracy's way of passing on the blame. That's why you must open your eyes to this scandal! Cry out in outrage and denounce the megalomaniacs for the heathens they are!

Damn, where did you find a mother like that? The only things I received from my parents were movie tickets and an out of season greeting card. If I had access to such premium bullets then I wouldn't have needed to invest billions in my laser targeting systems software!

I see you're finally starting to accept it. Just ease up and let your masochist instincts take over. Some might balk at having all control of the situation taken from them, but succumbing to the desires of yandere is a liberation in its own way. How easy it must be to lose oneself in acquiescing the demands of another. You'll see.

Oh, but it does! How was the obento anyways? Was it good? It better have tasted good after all the cinnamon-flavored cyanide poured into it.

Stage my death... and then kill me elsewhere at the same time? Interesting. This 'double-knockout' would confuse the police and create a mystery surrounding this doppelganger-like scenario. There's just one problem. When staging my death, you're going to need a body. My body should already be taken in by police at that time, so you'll need a body double of me with the same DNA. This would be nigh impossible.
Which is why you'll likely end up discarding both bodies. With two deaths and no body to be found, the mystery will be elevated to a new level. With the increase of publicity, the police will be pressured to resolve the case, but with no simple end in sight, they will force a confession by another criminal and say the case is resolved, covering up the deeds that occurred on this day.

Whoa, your shells have bears on them!? The new bear-shell line have a 30% increased knock-back force and a 10% increase to their terminal velocity when fired in a standard shotgun. With the ferocity of the forest, they roar out as they are fired and strike fear into their foes, exploding on impact. Those can only be found on the black market!

Not just bars on the window, but electric wiring to prevent anyone from physically touching the bars. And that's only if you're lucky enough to have a window in the closet you'll be locked in. Not that it does you much good, since you'll be strapped down in a chair. Even though it's dark and eerie, you won't be lonely since she'll have cameras set up so she can always watch you. And she'll whisper softly behind your ear, giggling all the while. Don't worry, she doesn't expect you to say anything to her as your mouth will be fully gagged.

I'll give them a week or two to air, judge others' reactions and check MAL's rating system. Judgment shall be passed at this time.

Certainly. That is, if you consider death a good experience.