Shout-out to Dilan-sama for which this magnificent review is for!
MAL users prepare your collective anus for what is possible the longest and most rantiest review you will ever read.
The first half of the review, the episode deconstructions, should only be read by those who have actually watched the show since it won't make sense otherwise.
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DISCLAIMERS!
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- Do NOT take this review 100% seriously. While I will say that I personally hated it, it is completely fine if you do like it! I am only poking a bit of fun into, IMO, a very badly written story.
- Do NOT read if you do not wanted to be spoiled since this is extremely spoiler heavy.
- Do NOT read if you do not like profanity since the review is covered with it.
- This isn't really a disclaimer but more of heads up. Since this review is huge there will be grammar mistake and stuff so please forgive me!
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Episode one
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• Main character is retarded. His reaction for being abducted is very calm and abnormal.
• He gets thrown the main chicks clothes and presumes its seduction, then acts like a retard (seriously what was he doing?).
• He just sort of stands about having been abducted, his thoughts contradict his actions.
• Why is everyone already an asshole in this show, so a human is forcibly made into familiar without consent and everyone is OK with that no questions asked.
• The main chick is fucking insane. She is just platinum mad for no reason.
• Of course she has to kiss him to seal the ritual. Well lots of things wrong with this. Firstly why was this not explained/shown beforehand? And why a kiss? To make their relationship deep and shit?
• Why was the teacher not informed of the crazy chick beforehand? Why should the teacher just expect to believe her students for no good reason other than it won’t end well?
• So only after he understands her words he decides to run away instead of asking for help/guidance, logical. O and he comes past one obstacle and the first thing he does is crawl. You have to be stupid to think that would work. It also undermines his whole situation. Does he take being held captive by a “cult” as a joke?
• So the asshole with the rose starts levitating the main guy. What a dick. I mean that is one scared human (I think?) and he just playing him like he is some trash. Do the people not understand he is fucking human?
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Episode two
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• So the main character is chained up. Firstly I have to question the ethics and humanity of Louise since she clearly gives no fucks about our main guy. She seems mentally unstable, after all she go into fits of massive rage and treats her own species like shit. Like would you even treat a familiar like this, even it wasn’t human?
• Now she starts striping in front of him again. Ok so why does she think of him as a familiar and not human since he looks human and kind of acts like one? Does she have no shame? Also how does she expect him to wash her clothes if he is chained up?
• O and our main guy once again shows us that he does not take the situation seriously (he has been taken away against his will) by just acting like an idiot when is throw some panties.
• Also the main guy is a submissive little bitch.
• Louise won't even dress herself. I mean that really is the epitome of lazy
• Main guy seems to have adapted pretty well to the surrounding. I mean if it were me I would try everything to get the fuck away if I were being held AGAINST MY WILL but that’s just me you know. Also does this guy not care about his family? He has not even thought about them. What a guy.
• Blonde rose guy again shows us his assholely when we find out he is dating two women at once. God is everyone in this show like this? I mean I have still to find one character that is likable.
• Shounen power for the win. Got to have those cheesy speeches before you fight you know.
• I also like how convenient it is for his powers to start working. So how much plot armour do you have? I’m betting a lot.
• See more evidence that Louise is indeed mentally insane. She now has no problem taking care of him even though only at the start of the episode she was convinced he was just a familiar. Like what exactly changed? Because he had a fight with a “noble” and THAT made him look more human?
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Episode three
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• Tsundere bitch.
• Well I mean I was already pretty sure but our main character is of course a pervert. How original. How edgy.
• And I shit you not I think I have experienced the most cringe worthy “song” ever. Like you can tell the writer but a lot of thought into that. Also even our main guy is a dick.
• WOW. Main guy so smart. His thought process “OK so she has let me off the hook so I think I will continue to make fun of her even though she is crazy and risk not getting food”. Our hero, what a guy.
• I had a feeling red hair chick was easy but really you want to bang that guy? I mean you have spoken to guy like once and you already want his dick? Makes sense.
• This show is yoke right? She is in love with him? Kiddingz me?
• This show never amazes me… that is all.
• So not only is blond rose guy a cheating bastard but this bitch as well? Whelp.
• This Louise character is truly a bitch. So after taking him away from red hair slut she proceeds to tell him she is going to treat him like a dog rather than human. HOLY SHIT. She has yet to treat him like a proper human thus far having chained him, eat food off the floor, etc. If she thinks that this is how a human should be treated she is utterly out of her mind.
• Now she starts whipping him. This bitch needs to die. She is just awful to the people around her. I mean the reason doesn't even make sense, he is late due to something completely out of his control and she is “jealous” so she whips him. The writer is doing a great job hear making us hate all these assholes.
• Seriously you’re going to put your hands there on her chest rather than her stomach? Like are you retarded?
• So both of these chicks kick him the face when he says even something a little bit out of line. What a good way to show their love.
• Also I’m pretty sure they are both complete idiots. The sword starts talking smack and they assume it’s him even though it sounds NOTHING like him. How smart.
• These characters have no redeeming qualities. Main dude is a pervert, he is an asshole, and he complains a lot, retarded and one indecisive bastard.
• Louise is a tsundere… I have nothing more to add even though I could.
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Episode four
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• The bouncing boob sound. This show is truly classy.
• So the maid is of course one of those people with low self-esteem until our main guy comes along. Like really I’m sure you would continue absolutely fine without him. After all there is nothing to suggest that you couldn't. After all the world building has been extremely poor so far. I know next to nothing about how anything works.
• So our main guy know red head like him but still chooses to go into her room. If you are not going to give her the goofballs then why go in at all. Like to like to see her tease you but then be like “na fuck you bitch gunna now do the same thing to your rival”. What a guy.
• O shit drama. Maid now has work for someone else and main guy, knowing her for only a few days will of course do something.
• Typical bad guy who is a dick for no reason.
• I like how the main guy just waltz into red head slut’s room and demands her treasure, explains nothing then goes into a fit of rage. Smart guy I swear guys.
• Much romance. So deep. Shame this guy gives no fucks.
• This main guy is hard to watch. Why does he just go into any situation head first without thinking about shit? He irresponsible and selfish. Nearly got bitch punished which he seems to care for so much (even though she is a bitch).
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Episode five
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• “I could wash your panties live” – That main dude
• Seriously though he is either retarded if he is serious or a masterful troll. I’m going to bet on the former.
• So my understanding is that ALL the jokes are basically sex/echhi ones. God at least try to be original. I’m going to bet that they going to beat a dead horse to death with these jokes.
• Yes! More harem bait in the form of the princess… didn't see that one coming.
• So queen and bitch meet each other brace each other and state they are friends and only then does main guy ask “do you know each other?. Well of course they fucking do, they just said so!
• How can no one notice the massive fucking golem? I everyone blind?
• How am I supposed to take this show seriously when it trying to have a plot. OK so where the fuck are the guards when the golem attacked? Why can bitch break through the barrier being a n00b while the golem cannot?
• It’s not your responsibility bitch buts it’s not the guards either since we don’t have any…
• End episode with cliché #5923. You know the old I didn't run away because otherwise I wouldn't be an ‘insert relevant’ otherwise.
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Episode six
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• Yhh bitch don’t even think about being nice to my familiar. O familiar I’m going to hit you for not rejecting one the few people who are nice to you. I mean god why doesn't the main guy understand? Because I certainly don’t.
• OK. Time to use the logic hammer. So the princess is going too held accountable because of the lack security around the academy and it being around the princess. OK so security must be outright bad since whoever decided to concentrate the guards in a single area is retarded. Like someone could just come from the side, the sky or some angle and give her the deaths. What is stopping them since no one would see them until it’s too late. After all a fucking GIANT GOLEM was only noticed when it made a huge crack in the wall. And why would the princess be held accountable. Doesn't she have someone who deals with guard formations and whatnot? Why would they make her do it?
• Wait so they just let red slut into the meeting no questions asked? Doesn't she have like a class to attend?
• OMFG. So the headmaster asks who wants to go after the thief and of course those more suited for the job decline like pussies but agrees for the STUDENTS to go. Wtf what if they die? Will the headmaster just be like “o well”. I’d be OK with this if any effective world building had been established. But through the stuff I've seen so far this just seems completely retarded.
• Lol that justification for letting them go after her. Ok by my logic Louise shouldn't go since she can’t do magic and is a massive liability. Headmaster states that he has HEARD slut is good at fire magic. So what? You’re going to let her go on hearsay? And from what I have seen her fire magic is no match vs golem. And I can’t comment shy girl since she is bland as all hell. We are TOLD she is a knight (how dull) so I guess that means she is good to go.
• God those boob shots. Please have mercy on me. Common misconception (probably not to those reading) but boobs of that size and magnitude are actually just distracting rather than attractive. Like 1/7 would not fap.
• OK so they go into the shed/house thingy to check for clues/staff and proceed to not check… apart from shy girl. So main guy and slut and fucking useless but hey shy girl good job. You’re like the only character to not piss me off.
• So Tony appears and wreaks shit up and they attack it to no avail. Was I surprised? Of course not, their attacks where going to be fucking useless.
• So bitch just stands their makes a silly speech about what it means to be a noble because of some pride she has. Is she stupid? Her pride nearly got her killed if it wasn't for our plot armoured Saito (main guy = Saito).
• Holy shit. Main guy bitch slapped bitch. I have no complaints. 7/7
• She claims that she will be made fun of if she runs. She is mentally unstable I know but come on you would rather die than live and be made fun of a little?
• Fucking shuonen fights. So boring if you know they no chance of losing in the slightest.
• O man that twist. Shame I give no shits about her or the people she is trying to kill. Also how did she go from bitch to evil bitch with basically no foreshadowing other than HAIR COLOUR?
• And we don’t even get to find out why she stole the dam thing. Real.
• Fuck off main guy you have barely even tried to get back home so stop being so sad fuck one those harem girls you have. Jeez.
• You are a fucking liar you do not want to go back home so shut your whore mouth.
• Does this guy enjoy being someone’s servant? I, for the life of me, cannot figure out why he likes her or being a familiar since he is treated mostly like trash.
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Episode 7
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• So the episode immediately starts off retarded with our main guy misunderstanding a kiss on the hand for kiss on the lip. Like bitch clearly stated kiss her on the hand. I mean this interaction isn’t even abnormal from the planet he comes from dammit.
• Around 7:10 seconds. Why does this exist?
• Please Dilan-sama have mercy on my soul. I don’t even know anymore.
• So the slut who washes the dishes wants his dick already. Why?!? What about this guy makes all women want to fuck him. So according to outside sources this guy is a 4/7 on the “would you bang” scale. I don’t think a 4 warrants all these girls wanting his penis.
• More assholes again. Of course the tax collector is just a dick for no reason other than to make Saito look like he actually cares.
• “I’m the only one who is allowed to touch Louise” #Creepy #ThisStillSoundsCreepyWithContext
• O shit what a tense cliff-hanger. I’m am literally on the edge of my seat. /sarcasm
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Episode eight
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• O look the boob groping “joke” while riding a horse. I swear they used that already… I will tell you what is wrong with this. Firstly holding someone’s chest rather than their stomach is just awkward while riding a horse so it makes no sense from a functional point of view. Also you are that much of a fucking pervert that you can just touch her pancakes. What a dick. This is actually one of the view times I am OK with her giving him abuse. Asshole deserves it.
• Who hugs likes that’s? Just seems uncomfortable.
• Just a general thought not related to the episode, I still think that tsundere bitch is completely broken in the head and the way she treats main guy is evil but I think I at least understand some of her anger. This guy is completed retarded and unlikable so I can get the rage.
• So bitch has the most obvious feelings for main guy and is in utter denial. I am both understanding and totally confused. So does she actually realise she likes him or are her words not representative of her thoughts? Why does she like him? He is selfish asshole and is boring and unfunny. I mean hell, bitch herself probably abuses him for some of these reasons.
• Wait shy girl and slut are actually friends? Is this real life? Why? They seem to have absolutely nothing common nor do they even speak much to each other unless she is needed for the plot.
• Gawd, trying to use the sad story tactic huh? Seems grossly out of place in a light-hearted anime about boobs. I mean this will probably go nowhere and shy girl will only serve as more harem bait. Also this scene wasn't very impactful as it just kind of happened out of the blue with basically no foreshadowing. Like everything just seems to blown way out proportion with the music and crazy mum.
• HOLD THE FUCK UP. Am I missing something or did I just go full retard? Did the mother of the shy girl drink that potion of mind rape knowing it would mind rape her? Why did she simply not throw is away? She clearly knew it was bad since she took it away from her daughter so why did she herself drink it? This make absolutely no sense what so ever.
• Wait she can beat a three-headed dragon but not a golem? And without a familiar? Much consistent, so logic.
• I think one wanting a bath… or for that matter keeping ones self-clean is universal to the human race not just the Japanese. Do you think the rest of us just roll around in the dirt? And yes this is such an insignificant thing but fuck this guy.
• The maid is too fucking docile. Like really do you not understand the concept of bubbles? Could you not foresee someone being in that water? And why stand that close anyway?
• He’s having a fucking bath what do you think he is doing? It’s not hard to piece together.
• Wait a second! Did maid put bath in quotations as to question what a bath actually is? Baths and washing ones-self exists in this word right?
• OK didn’t she have a pot to transport? Was she like well I’ve broken it so I can stop working now? She is just going to leave it there? Also main guy if you don’t intend to give her the goofballs then man up and tell her to gtfo because toying with her (since you know she likes you) is a dick move.
• And he upset bitch. What a guy. He likes her right (I’m assuming he must since this a predictable harem/echhi show)? Why does he fuck around with women he is not interested right?
• Not really sneaking if you rage talk to yourself out loud. Also isn’t talking to yourself like that a sign of mental instability? Telling you guys she is mad in the head.
• So knowing that bitch is in “love” with main guy, even if it was accidental, will main guy do? I’m guessing he will mess around for a bit a toy with her some more. That is our main protagonist friends.
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Episode nine
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• OK so this is a love comedy magic fantasy things so I get love potions a one those things that just exist in these kind of settings but is just seems highly unethical to use one of these things. Doesn’t forcing someone to love you beat the whole of someone loving you? And with consent? Also why does blond girl want blond rose guy to even like her? I got the impression she hated him? Since you know he is a dick to her.
• O gawd everything this blond guy says sounds like it came out of an 80’s cheesy romance movie (not that I have ever watched one, just speculation on my part). He is basically as 1 d as you get. His personality is a potato.
• Honestly I think one of things that most annoys about this anime is how its setting has potential. So you basically could explore a massive amounts of things/themes within the setting like social classes and mage rankings. You could also have that conflicting theme between choosing the people you have come to love in one world over the people you love in another. You also could have a had a theme on how difficult it is to adapt to a new setting when you are so used to an old one and how those people around you can help you. It also could have had a theme of what is more important in this world: being human or familiar? How sad
• Real! Love potions are forbidden by law. So how did blond bitch get a hold of one? Does she not care both the law and human ethics? She seems a like a pretty horrid person.
• Blond girl doesn’t even look like she cares she forced some to love someone else without consent (this sounds stupid but it forbidden by law no?).
• I like how they can leave the academy no one even cares/notices. Like they have places which they stay in so I assume they are supposed to stay on campus right? I mean don’t get me wrong if you want to leave campus no one should be allowed to stop you but isn’t it board daylight so wont classes be on? They are going to be punished for skipping class’ right?
• The “comedy” is so bad in this show. I don’t really like to judge shows on comedy since I don’t understand Japanese comedy but this is just outright bad. So blond guy is “drowning” right and unlike any normal person he just continues to flap around like a retard other than just swimming to the edge since it literally like a meter away. Also can’t he just levitate himself out of water or something?
• Has main guy killed before? He seems awfully ok with just killing a bunch of people for a tear. Given they are probably a bunch of assholes but I know I wouldn’t want killing a bunch of people on my conscious. Unless I’m misinterpreting eradicate for another meaning other than kill then this guy is an even bigger asshole than I could have ever though he would be.
• I don’t understand the love potion. So let us assume the only thing the potion does is make someone fall in love with you and nothing else is changed. Bitch already was in love with the main guy… the only difference of not being affected with a love potion is that she was unable to share her feelings. Now that she can share her feeling why does she act completely different? She should still have that same bitchy personality but know she is just clingy and paranoid. A love potion shouldn’t cause her to have an entirely different personality.
• Main guy treats bitch like she is 3 or something. “Be a good girl and stay there.” How condescending can you be? She is probably around the same age as you.
• Wait a second was that a… decent plot twist? Don’t get me wrong everything is so shitty at this point that I can’t feel happy about but it was foreshadowed last episode so I don’t feel completely cheated it was them. Still though, shit characters and awful plot still make this bad moment. There is still NO tension or drama so it is just… disappointing
• I feel like this is a little too serious over a fucking love potion in a comedy romance anime.
• It’s one of those intense cliff-hangers guys. The mysterious man is named Cromwell, o shiiit.
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Episode ten
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• See this is what annoys me. We have these “Germania” and yet we know nothing about them. So how am I supposed to feel when she tells bitch this? I take it that this is bad since she clearly doesn’t want to get married but honestly I feel nothing. I know nothing of Germania or the fucking country they live in.
• This entire scene is out of place. To my understanding this show is a comedy harem show not a show with a plot and characters that matter. Like why would I care about any of the stuff they are talking about? Even for those who like the show this scene is just weird. I don’t know about any of the politics or nations or anything and the writers have decided to show us the worst way possible… by telling us rather than showing us. How am supposed to feel like any of this has meaning if I don’t get to see/experience it? How am I supposed to know Germania is really “barbaric”?
• Well of course our main guy has the most powerful element: void. How exciting.
• Cliché #4128 “You know, I will protect you” speech. I mean really now does such a thing have to be said? Shouldn’t it be a given that you protect her. I mean you might want to just reinsure her but could you have done it in a less cheesy fashion?
• Again lack of foreshadowing has prevented any potential drama and interest from happening. This Ward-sama has come out of nowhere and is bitch’s husbando to be. Only problem with this is there was no build up or tension so I don’t really care. I also know that things will just resolve in nice knotted bow so yhh.
• He is a nice guy huh? I bet you haven’t even had a conversation with him yet so you know not enough to make such an assumption.
• Wait just a second? NO guy would do what this does if he didn’t want to give bitch the goofballs. Lying bastard.
• I could be totally wrong and I legitimately mean it but I’m going to put money that ward-sama is not a nice guy.
• I think another reason I don’t care they are getting married is that main guy doesn’t actually care. So why are they making a big thing out of it? Would be way more interesting if main guy actually tried to fight for Louise’s love.
• Much drama. So original. 7/7 would watch again
• Why are they suddenly fighting? This has come out of nowhere. No logical build up or anything. This makes no sense. What even is logic?
• So main guy loses to Ward-sama and Ward-sama is like you are unable to protect bitch. While I agree somewhat with that statement it is still a little off. Firstly how to expect some teenager to beat you? It’s not exactly fair is it now. Also just because he lost to you doesn’t mean he will lose to others. He beat a golem your statement “you are unable to protect bitch” is inaccurate.
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Episode eleven
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• He is crying? WHY?!? Are you just a giant pussy because you got beat in a fight you agreed to?
• This guy just makes me even more fucking mad. This is actually one of the most awful characters I have ever seen. Even when bitch tries to cheer him up he just acts like a little emo bitch. Get over yourself and grow some balls.
• O no Tony is back. Also really the clichéd #5331 evil laugh for no apparent reason.
• This Ward-sama is fucking creepy. Why does he feel the need to whisper I will protect you into her ear? She not only heard you the first time but if you really felt the need to tell her again wouldn’t you have done it in a more normal way? A way that makes you seems less creepy.
• FUCK OFF! ALL CAPS MODE ON! WHERE THE FUCK DID RED SLUT AND SHY GIRL COME FROM. WHY ARE THEY HERE? HOW DID THEY KNOW WHERE TO COME FROM? AND WHAT VERY CONVIENT TIMING!
• Attacking from the side lol. She very clearly attacked you from the front. Mad coz bad?
• You yoking me? She can just jump into the air and teleport off. Amazing.
• How the fuck could red slut find out where they went? The only people who knew about the trip where the princess and those on the trip. So who could she have asked to find out? It couldn’t have been princess since she must have left as soon as she was done. Was it magic because that would be waaaay to convenient? And just because she said it took her all day to find out does not make it a valid reason.
• Main guy again being an asshole. He asks a question the inn keeper and he answers him. And only because the answer was not specific enough he has to throw a fit and slams the desk. What a guy.
• Real. She somehow heard Saito’s voice over an impossibly huge distance. I guess that makes their relationship deep and shit now?
• Lol. “There is no one here” Suddenly 10 guards in front of your face. How could you miss them?
• What? Now there is a war? And an organization pulling the strings? You are just making this shit as you go along aren’t you?
• FUCKING CALLED IT! Ward-sama is a bad man. How predictable can this show get!
• And they make bitch in need of help. Cliché #1 “Damsel in distress”. If you’re going to you use this please add something original otherwise you are a complete failure of a show.
• Pls no more cheese in my face. Pls no more extremely convenient timings or cliché dialog.
• O no you killed the guy that only have 2 mins of screen time! Masterful writing and timing. What a twist! Seriously though how do expect me to feel anything for this guy? I couldn’t care less since I don’t even know who he is.
• Right so this guy just wants to marry bitch for her personality? WHY??? Explanations are in order right? It would make sense if you wanted to marry her for political power or something but this just makes no sense.
• Jesus penis more ass pulls. Suddenly he has the power to absorb magic and make his sword stronger for no reason other than heart power? Why bother have him fight at all if he is just going to auto win? It’s like playing a game on very easy when you have already completed the game on normal. Like why play the game on very easy at that point. You already know how to play the dam thing.
• “If we linger why any longer we are done for” say that while lingering. Why don’t you just move then?
• OK so they kiss at the end. I kind of don’t mind this since it’s not in your face and shiz. Shame the characters, setting, and everything about the show sucks.
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Episode twelve
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• I don’t think you can take full responsibility here. How about the people who hired Ward to be the guide. Surely it was there job to ensure that he would fulfil he his duties and that the fact he was unable to shows they hired the wrong person.
• I like how the show is regressing rather than progressing. At this point the climax to the finale should be getting bigger. Why the episode has started with more echhi/tsundere shenanigans is beyond me. Why is it slowing down with only two episodes to go?
• I fucking hate main guy. The asshole kisses bitch then acts like nothing happened. Why is he in denial? Also at this point he MUST know bitch likes him. So why does he just run off with maid and not explain anything to bitch? You are at the very least friends so the least you could do is explain why you are leaving. Jeez
• Explain to main guy why is it ok that you don’t tell her? It’s not like you had to go right then and there I’m sure she would have given you time to talk to bitch.
• OK so it’s going to be like that huh? You’re going to deny that you like bitch for whatever reason. You writers make me sick, just making main guy be in denial for no logical reason other than to keep this haram shit going. Pls stop writing.
• Why does he look like he actually wants to go back home? This guy has barely said or done anything to even try to get back. I’m sorry but he is just a walking contradiction.
• More random sad moments that come out of nowhere! So the princess was in love the prince? Where did this come from? And why should I care? I barely knew either of the characters.
• How do expect him to mass produce gasoline if he doesn’t even know what it is? Do you even know how it’s made? Because given the technology this world has it seems to be it would be pretty hard to obtain.
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Last episode
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• Weird that they add a bunch of new sound effects to the OP of the last episode. I don’t really get it since they sound out of place since it doesn’t flow well with the sound already there.
• “I will take command of our military” – Princess. OK time to use the logic hammer again. So the show has failed to present anything that would suggest you would be good at commanding an army. If anything the anime has suggested you would be an awful candidate for such a job. After all remember when that golem attacked the academy and you thought it would be a good idea to concentrate all your troops into one super dense area so you didn’t even know you were being attacked? It seems to be you are horrible at strategy and tactics. GG WP!
• Notice how half of his memories are ones of either abuse or sadness with bitch. See how their relationship is mostly artificial with no real weight?
• That is the most underwhelming invasion I have seen. One ship? Kiddingz me?
• That outfit the princess is wearing seems pretty impractical. What is she going to do? Seduce her enemies to death (which to be fair might not be the worst plan…)?
• OK I thought the invading parties numbers where underwhelming but the defending side is a joke. How am I supposed to take this war seriously? Also why the fuck is bitch there? She can’t possible defend herself against trained soldiers. Won’t she be a massive liability?
• Why is blond rose guy still in his uniform? This show is retarded.
• I have no more yoke to give. I don’t understand anymore. The impracticability of both flying a plane and using his sword at the same time.
• Where are the defending sides’ mages? Don’t they have any? Why is just Tony a problem?
• Even more retarded stuff. Why doesn’t she make a new golem? Why was she not burned to deaths since she was covered in the oil?
• Ward-sama has map awareness of a potato. Isn’t this guy to be an elite fighter? Why didn’t he see that dragon attack coming from a mile away?
• Of course Loiuse happens to be super op and have the most broken magic in the world. How interesting. See this is just boring since we know that it’s just bound to work with no consequence.
• Did bitch just mass murder everyone on the opposing side? Given the attacking side where a bunch of dicks and I don’t think they had a chance to surrender but still…
• So after all he has been saying about how badly he wants to get home he fucking doesn’t? FUCK OFF! You lying piece of shit. I guess this is just a middle finger to your family huh? “O sorry guys I’d rather flirt with a bunch of girls than be with my family”. Our fucking hero, what a guy!
• Cliché villain is beaten just like that. What an ending you know.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Conclusion
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Since I have a lot to conclude I will divide the conclusion into multiple sections.
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Characters
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So this is where most of the problems lie in this show. A decent show at least depends on characters that are likable and this show has no likable characters. I will deconstruct the ones that matter and give my opinion on how they can be improved.
Saito - This is possible the worst character of this show... or of any show. He
fails even the most basic traits of a good character. He is not relatable in any
way having basically zero charisma, being an asshole for no reason, flirts around with a bunch of women even though he likes Louise and she likes him back, indecisive, rushes head first without thinking about it, etc.
He also doesn't care much about his family which he basically never mentions and never feel homesick yet always makes the claim that he wants to return home. Not only is this a contradiction but it makes him come a across as a heartless asshole.
What the writers could have done IMO is have him talk a little bit about his family. This would not only make him come across as a more likeable and relateable guy but actually proves that he wants to go back home.
Louise - Her character is just a complete and utter mess. I don't like the tsundere archetype since these people don't actually exist in real life so its hard to relate to them however if character development/history is explored and developed enough then that is perfectly acceptable.
Her tsundere ways are, however, not even remotely explained so she just comes across as a crazy bitch. Had the writer just been bothered to give even a small explanation then her character might have been bearable. And personally I would have toned down the crazy a bit.
No other characters are worth talking about since they are just 1-D cardboard cutouts.
My overall score for characters is 1/10.
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Story
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The story is abysmal if you can even call it a story. The structure and flow and completely nonsensical. It basically does its own thing when it likes and how it likes it. Since I cant describe the story much beyond the synopsis because it is so random I will not bother.
Instead I talk about how how the story could be improved. For one the story could actually have a sense of direction by using, for example, the goal of the protagonist to get home and his journey. It can also explain some of the themes its premise presented like social classes and mage rankings. You could also have that conflicting theme between choosing the people you have come to love in one world over the people you love in another. You also could have a had a theme on how difficult it is to adapt to a new setting when you are so used to an old one and how those people around you can help you. It also could have had a theme of what is more important in this world: being human or familiar? (taken from episode nine). By using these the story could be great!
Story gets a 1/10
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Animation, art-style, sound, acting and all that jazz
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Honestly all of this stuff was alright but not great. The animation was alright apart from the fights which where just very unimpressive and uninspired.
The art was kinda OK. Backgrounds where actually pretty decent but character designs where mediocre. Saito's in particular was bad, just being very bland and generic just like his character. At least SAO had amazing visuals to make up for its awful writing.
Sound was decent. That is all. Voice acting was also decent. No one stood in particular but no one was bad.
Overall: 5.5
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My enjoyments/final thoughts
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Alright so I hated this anime but at the same time I also quite enjoyed it. Yup. It was fun ripping it apart and being honest I can kinda maybe understand if someone liked this.
Enjoyment gets a 7/10
The main reason I rate the show so low is because of the potential it hard to better than the average with its intriguing setting and possibilities. But because it failed it has made me sad and mad.
The show gets a 1/7. WOULD NOT WATCH EVER AGAIN!!!!!!
Dec 24, 2013
Zero no Tsukaima
(Anime)
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Shout-out to Dilan-sama for which this magnificent review is for!
MAL users prepare your collective anus for what is possible the longest and most rantiest review you will ever read. The first half of the review, the episode deconstructions, should only be read by those who have actually watched the show since it won't make sense otherwise. ****************** DISCLAIMERS! ****************** ... 
Jan 9, 2013
Fate/stay night
(Anime)
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So I decided to review this 'cause it's really overrated and wanted people to know it's overrated. Anyways...
___CHARACTERS___ Any story needs good characters to carry a good story, however no matter how good the story is, if the characters suck so will the story. This is the case with Fate/Stay Night. Most of the characters are flat with little to no character development. Let me breakdown some of the main characters so you have an understanding as to why they suck. Shirou: Weirdly both the best and worst character in the anime. Let me explain what I mean. He gets the most character development, he finds ... |
