"Try your very best to not write any spoilers."
Unfortunately, here's the biggest spoiler of them all.
THIS SERIES SUCKED!
Oh, are you still here? Let's get some (but not much) detail into this horribly sucky series. Will I tell all? No, I'm not Oprah. If you want to know the full details, you'll have to suffer as well. Now, on to the review.
Where oh where to begin.
About a month ago I suffered a heart attack. Compared to watching this horrid series, that was enjoyable. The incredible pain I was put through as a catheter was rammed into my leg and threaded into my heart was pleasant
...
compared to the agony of sitting through this absolutely horrid anime.
There was a plot... somewhere. At times, I honestly think the writers even forgot what the plot was. First, we have horny redneck trying to get into the big city. I was honestly waiting for him to screw that cow in the first episode. I would've gotten a good laugh if he'd introduced himself as "Name's Hideki ma'am" and then spit between his shoes. Nope, he doesn't even have that much personality. I think I've left more personality in a tissue after blowing my nose.
Ok... oh and yeah, he's a complete and total dork. Not even in a good way. More along the lines of having to remember to breathe kind of retarded dork. Who wants a human shaped computer (that's cute, don't forget cute! big time keyword here) to look up... porn.
And he never does! The moron continues to buy skin rags while supporting this irritating contraption.
And not to be outdone by the fact that every single character looks like it suffers from some form of extreme downs syndrome (really, sloped foreheads, extremely wide spaced eyes, almost inhuman shaped chins) but the computers are these weird basically android like constructs called... wait for it... wait for it... Persocoms. Great name eh? Freaking amazing. I remember when I had first come across this series I thought that it was one that had been done back in the 80's (I could've forgiven it if it had been. a lot of really weird things came out in the 80's) but no... it's a fairly recent anime. In fact, it was done in 2002. 2002! Did the clamp group really have absolutely no experience with computers at all?! just how far does artistic license go?
So, boy genius (Hideki) winds up picking up a "persocom" out of a trash heap and eventually names her Chi. Hey, I'm a geek... and I used to dumpster dive. Got some really great parts that way! But somehow, this guy comes across the most advanced of all persocoms... in the trash.
So that brings us to Chi. Poor little incredibly retarded Chi. Someone really should've shot her and put her down. It would have saved so much time and money that was wasted on the production of this horrid series. Anyway, poor retarded Chi goes from useless retard to somehow becoming the uber grail of computers. She goes from not knowing anything at all to having some kind of amazing "learning" software installed. Wow! I know some A.I. groups that would just absolutely kill for that! Just a taste of how it was done would keep them happy for decades. And this amazing, hideously disfigured retard comes standard with it.
So, I guess to mock microsoft, she's not retarded, she's advanced! (yes, blatantly ripping off the "It's not a bug, it's an undocumented feature" legend) So advanced in fact that her creator's wife (another exceptionally ugly woman) just somehow winds up managing (and later you find out, owning) the apartment that Hideki and Chi live in. Holy cow, can we say contrived?
And then... he meets more dorks. Who spout the stupidest things. I spent 27 episodes just telling myself I'll finish this. It'll be worth it. I'll give you a hint.
It wasn't.
However, you do get to eventually meet an odd underage bimbo who's proud of her breasts (and well she should be, since she's not got a damn thing else going for her), a pair of micro/mini persocoms that are actually just loaded with personality. Sumomo was actually a bit fun to watch, and Kotoko was very funny. However, they are fairly minor characters, who wind up around Hideki and Chi in exceptionally contrived circumstances.
It took me almost two weeks to get through this lousy series. I was constantly finding better things to do, but still trying my damnedest not to watch something else until I finished it.
But hey, if boring as all hell, repetitive, flash back ridden, loosely mangled plot lines (yeah bull crap that the entire plot was developed before a single image was drawn. If you believe that one, yet can sit through this entire series AND still think the plot was well developed... well... something tells me you ate a lot of wall candy as a kid. Maybe even still do.) lousy animation, occasional special effects (that oddly are better drawn than the characters(?!)) then this anime was made just for you.
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May 14, 2009
"Try your very best to not write any spoilers."
Unfortunately, here's the biggest spoiler of them all. THIS SERIES SUCKED! Oh, are you still here? Let's get some (but not much) detail into this horribly sucky series. Will I tell all? No, I'm not Oprah. If you want to know the full details, you'll have to suffer as well. Now, on to the review. Where oh where to begin. About a month ago I suffered a heart attack. Compared to watching this horrid series, that was enjoyable. The incredible pain I was put through as a catheter was rammed into my leg and threaded into my heart was pleasant ... |
