| This is a manga that I worked on for some time and its finally finished! Its a comedy, draft comic (I guess) and slice of life. L.I Dynasty 0 One-shot much?  Please after you read it tell me what you think. |
 Im not bad at english Im just a horrible speller |
| Well I like the drawings. Unfortunately, it may just be my computer, but I think the text is a little too small. I tried zooming in, but I can't read it. Also, you have a couple of grammatical errors... |
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| I’m not really good at writing reviews but I’ll do my best :D Li comics initial review: This is gonna be my honest review. I’ll grade each criteria one by one. Story Concept 7/10 The concept looks original –an SOL between an AI and his master, but I think the story wasn’t properly executed on the entire one shot. I’m not sure if it’s intentional, but I see that the goal of the characters weren’t portrayed in the story. Characters 8/10 The characters are fun. Their personality decently fits with the atmosphere. Since this is an SOL, loud characters make the flow livelier.Each of their arguments was well done. Grammar 6/10 If this is still a draft, having grammatical errors is acceptable. But if it’s not, I say that it must be revised. There are so many typos, so it’s better to proofread the script first on your word processor before pasting it on each manga page. Presentation 7/10 I’ve only got problems with some text that are too small, while there is a lot of provided space on the panel. Art 6/10 For the meantime I’ll give it 6. The Illustrations wasn’t cleaned up, the lines aren’t properly retraced and so on. I know you’re still improving but since you have a personal computer, I think it’s better to go digital as soon as possible. I’ve started to illustrate digitally ½ years prior, and now I’m still learning –I’m only using mouse though :D. As for the software, I suggest using manga studio. Even without a pen tab, you can easily draw there, plus, it already had default manga materials such as screen tones and monochromatic patterns, panels, brushes, speech balloons, flash effects, and 3D character reference and poses. For me, in terms of drawing manga, Manga Studio is the most convenient tool. Overall 6/10 Hopefully you’ll take my review as a form of constructive criticism, you’ve still got plenty of time. Just work harder for it :D |
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| I'll keep it short and simple. And I might sound harsh at times, but please understand, it's simply my evaluation of your work. First and foremost, it's confusing to read. Because the page moved from left to right, I thought it would be read as such. However, The panels seemed like they were right to left and I couldn't quite understand how the story was supposed to be read. Also, your addition of humor isn't... if I may put it- sequential. The stickman appeared out of nowhere without enough introduction for me to follow. I'm not saying that the humor is bad, but you might need to work on the sequence of your story. Finally, the text is too small. Try making them bigger. If it's a long sentence, cut it to two and place another balloon beside it. It's your first time, so I'll let grammar and illustration off the hook. But I hope you can improve them in the future. |
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