Fairy Tail Fanfiction

impmontamer03 said:
Fairy Tail is on my PTW, so figured out that reading a fanfic of it may just give me some ideas about what the universe will be.

Read the first six chapters, and gotta say you've gotten nice atmosphere and world building. From that, I'd guess that FT is an upbeat shonen series with magic. Guess I'll see that soon, but that thing itself already makes me bump FT into a more prioritized series I should check.

impmontamer03 said:
However, the battle can use a lot of improvement. My high standard for battle scenes is likely because I'm spoiled by some great battles in other fanfics I've ever read.
1. Big paragraphs take away the tension, along with long sentences. The paragraphs can use more spacing. I don't know if it's intended to be paragraphed that way or it's the BBCode problem, but it loses a lot of tension.

impmontamer03 said:
2. The visuals aren't enough. The prequip paragraph is a good example of visuals, but next up? Not too much. When Levy uses [Solid Script: Fire], how does the spell look like? A barrage of fireballs? A stream of fire? I can't visualize [a powerful fire attack]. And Elfman's monster form? How does that look like? I get that he's big, but it's still a very scant visual

impmontamer03 said:
3. The most lacking aspect in the battle is the physical strain. You just tell that the characters are tired/hurt. Go deeper into the character's feeling. How's the pain? Searing? Stabbing? Etc. But if the characters can't feel pain, then you can forgo them. And the wounds. How do they look like? Where are they located? Etc. More visuals are surefire way to increase tension because if described enough, readers can even feel the characters' pain, whether the characters feel it or not.

impmontamer03 said:
The key to write better fight scenes? First, read more stories that features great battles, not necessarily from fanfics in general or fanfics of the fandoms you know and love. This is the best one because it's hard to express the awesome explosive and/or bloody fights in your head with mere WORDS, so seeing the examples of such great fights will certainly give you ideas how to write them better. Second, this is less helpful, but do reflect on a few action animes/mangas you like. For example, what makes the fights so awesome? Answer it by yourself (e.g. awesome choreography a la TTGL, very bloody with emphasis on physicality a la Berserk, etc), and see how you can apply the answer to your work.

Milennin said:
Have you tried reading it on fanfiction.com? I'm not sure, but it might be a little more readable on there than on here. Link is in the first post.

Milennin said:
I know I'm bad at descriptions, but most of it is stuff from the anime, and this was written for those who have watched the show in mind. As for original designs (like the MC and his Prequip ability), I know they're super barebones and something I need to work on. I suppose that on the brightside, you can use your imagination to make it look whatever you want, lol.

Milennin said:
I have deliberately avoided going into greater detail about wounds, as Fairy Tail, the show, rarely shows any either. You'll hardly see any blood or real injuries, mostly just bruises, which is what I'm sticking to for my story as well to stay consistent to the feel of the original work. There might be a few exceptions to that in later battles, but that's mostly how it's going to be like.