| Hello guys, I'm just going to get straight to the point. I've been struggling for quite a while now to fit into society. By that I mean I have difficulties socializing and have had social anxiety for as long as I can remember. I was never a talkative person even before I had access to the internet, which was around 3rd grade. I haven't really thought about the importance of connecting with people and developing interpersonal skills until recently. I'm a university student who's currently looking for a job for my internship, and I realized that I have very little experience in dealing with people. I have nearly zero experience in job interviews, and worse yet, I have troubles interacting with others, especially with a group of people, and in a professional environment. It just dawned on me that the reason I was such a hardcore gamer a few years back was because I wanted to immerse myself in another world without worrying about other people. I only quit for the sole reason of doing well in school. But now, I consistently find myself binge watching Netflix, YouTube videos and anime, while putting off schoolwork. I realize that this is very unhealthy and destructive to my well-being. I know very well, that I need to improve myself, but I get extremely anxious and fearful for some reason I do not know, and I end up in this cycle of making goals to develop my social life but end up putting it off or downright dropping it. So I want to know if anyone here has been in a similar situation, and/or know of any way to improve oneself as a social being. |
| I deleted social media/video streaming apps from my phone/tablet. that helped me a bunch, it was gonna be a temporary thing until i was back on track but i got so used to it that i never got the apps back. As for social skills, just relax and be yourself. Working in fast food is honestly a good way to develop social skills, maybe try that if you have the chance even for a little. |
| The best thing to do about it is to make your own personal Blog. |
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| Go chill in nature and go for long walks, your mind hasen't time to think clearly because it's distracted all the time. Also you need to realise that you don't need to fit into society. Just be you and do what you want to do,you will find a way. Like with tetris if you try to fit in to much you disappear. |
| Can't give you any adivice on how to overcome your anxiety, but I can recommend that you delete your apps/etc. You could also get some type of blocker thing( I use cold turkey blocker, which is stupid) if you use a laptop/etc and lock yourself out of sites for a while. Locked myself out of one site until June 22nd. |
| Theres no easy way around it. Be social and you will be better at socialising. If you're particularly bad, all it really means is you're going to have a few cringy moments along the way. Which is good in and of itself since you're BOUND to learn from things that give your brain arthritis Anxiety is fear. Fear is fought by exposure. That's all there is to it. |
| You can never have too much time on MAL. That just doesn't work that way. |
Loerio said: I haven't really thought about the importance of connecting with people and developing interpersonal skills until recently. I'm a university student who's currently looking for a job for my internship, and I realized that I have very little experience in dealing with people. I have nearly zero experience in job interviews, and worse yet, I have troubles interacting with others, especially with a group of people, and in a professional environment. It's actually easiest to deal with people in a formal setting. The interaction is pretty stereotyped and mechanical. To bring some ease and levity to this, I would suggest, simply comes with experience. With interviews it might reassure you to imagine things from the interviewers perspective. You can allude to this if the opportunity presents itself. In some ways you want to be the last person they see after a long day, so you can be the relief. Loerio said: It just dawned on me that the reason I was such a hardcore gamer a few years back was because I wanted to immerse myself in another world without worrying about other people. I only quit for the sole reason of doing well in school. But now, I consistently find myself binge watching Netflix, YouTube videos and anime, while putting off schoolwork. I realize that this is very unhealthy and destructive to my well-being. I know very well, that I need to improve myself, but I get extremely anxious and fearful for some reason I do not know, and I end up in this cycle of making goals to develop my social life but end up putting it off or downright dropping it. In your mind you assert productive activity x is superior to y, and by using y to evade x you feel guilty. The guilt only compounds what you have built up for yourself as a problem. This type of mental self-flagellation is endemic to the middle class due to their view of time as a productive resource. This is the source of your problem. Here's some heresy for you: studying isn't superior to watching YouTube cat videos. You will struggle to believe this, yet an unproductive art dealer will be mysteriously more wealthy than you. If I asked you to list what you consider productive it will invariably be something like: reading, studying, working, social events, travelling, self-improvement of various kinds, etc. I hope just by enumerating these things you see them for what they are. If you meet someone who runs an estate you will notice they don't have this attitude, their power is light and effortless. |
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