chrissy_poo_too's Blog

Apr 3, 2019 10:51 AM
Anime Relations: Godzilla 3: Hoshi wo Kuu Mono
Spoiler Warning.

It’s another Polygon produced Godzilla movie. The first “action” scene takes place 40 minutes in. Before the first “action” scene:

A) People argue about space politics;

B) People examine 3D graphs;

C) A man rejects sexual advances from an underaged girl;

D) A man accepts sexual advances from an underaged girl;

E) People eat an underaged girl (later retracted);

F) People argue about space religion.

There’s a half hour gap between the first “action” scene and the second “action” scene. In between the two “action” scenes:

A) Lightning strikes a mountain;

B) A dream dragon bites Godzilla;

C) People argue about space philosophy;

D) Lightning strikes a mountain again;

E) Mothra makes an uncredited cameo;

F) Hiroshima gets nuked.

During the second “action” scene Godzilla attempts a massive babyface turn. He agrees not to bother anyone anymore as long as no one bothers him. Godzilla is a bee now.

Following the second “action” scene the protagonist kidnaps a comatose girl and bothers Godzilla. He is immediately lasered to death. Fin.

This movie is a travesty.
Posted by chrissy_poo_too | Apr 3, 2019 10:51 AM | Add a comment
It’s time to ditch the text file.
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