emperortopaz's Blog

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This is the Three-hundredth-fifty-eighth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers.

Welcome back everyone. Apparently I was able to defeat Bombos at the end of last month. However, it took the rest of my remaining strength. Luckily Ririchiyo was there and rescued me from an explosion. Not only that but she was able to bring me to Nurse Hitomi and Touko to get patched up. Touko also gave me a potion to stop my heart from beating fast.

: Glad to hear that you've gotten better since last week.

Of course, I'm full of energy now!

: Be careful as you may still be feeling the effects of the medication.

: Naw, he was able to do your blog last week. Let him do mine this time.

: But what if...

: He's fine, fine. What happens happens.

Does that mean I have permission to talk about you?

: About me? Are you sure that you know enough about me?

: Don't worry, that hasn't stopped Topaz before.

*Riri glares at Topaz.*

Yeahhhh... I deeply apologize for the hasty Tsubasa blog. Though at least my Snow Black one was a bit better, who knew THAT would be getting another season!

: Considering how much better it is than SAO it better get a movie as well!

Certainly!

: Hey, I'm not hearing you talk about me.

Sorry about that. We got distracted talking about my failings.

: Certainly, you mamocentric-minded moron who made it so that beautiful flat girls are unfairly biased against! Like a Blue Cure! Non-Aqua, at least...

I was young and stupid back then! Well, stupid at least and younger...

: Hey, speaking of "younger" I'm not getting any. How about you get going on your blog about me?

Er, sorry for all the distractions. But it seems...



Head
Hair: Touko has a pretty good head of hair. It's mostly black, though the anime seems to give it a dark purple shade instead (the color manga covers give her black so it's not just the monochrome nature of manga doing that). Either way the color is nice. Her hair is also really long, going past her hips but fortunately it doesn't seem to cover her butt most of the time. It's surprising as it seems to be really full of volume, but it's bandaged into a really thick ponytail in the back so that may be the reason why. It gives the impression that her hair falls straight down, which is one of my favorite hair styles (and more so on girls with dark hair). She has fairly long bangs, with the middle bang itself going all the way to her chin or so. She does have a slight part above her right eye, it seems. Her sides are also long, extending to her chest and being somewhat spiky. Her hair also has the odd parts sticking out the sides, somewhat plant-like though hard to describe. For a decoration Touko sometimes wears a cowgirl-ish hat, something not seen often outside of Western or homage series. Overall Touko's hair is nearly perfect, but her bangs are probably the only problem.
Grade: A

Eyes: Touko has really slim, tsurime eyes that look really nice. They do have sharp corners, and for an anime character they do seem smaller than normal. It's possible that's just the art style, but Touko being more mature may have something to do with it too. They're red, but with her dark hair color the fit her very well. Probably Touko's strongest point here is that she also wears glasses. Sadly it's mostly just in her “nurse” mode, and they're thin-framed glasses, but I do think it improves her look drastically.
Grade: A-

Face: Sadly Touko suffers a lot in this area. Like with her eyes she seems more mature than the other girls, and the art style doesn't lend itself to be to my liking most of the time. Touko's nose is pretty apparent, unlike than her sister's. Touko also has a pointed chin. Overall there's not much to like about Touko's face. Not that she's ugly or anything, she's just a bit too serious and mature for my tastes.
Grade: C+

Body
Build: At first look you can tell that Touko is an extremely curvy girl. She is top-heavy though, especially in the anime, which is really unfortunate. That said she does have some appealing points. While not exactly sexy it is cool that she's able to turn invisible. She also has a somewhat well-toned stomach, and with her sarashi and dark hair I compare her to Daidouji from Senran Kagura (though Touko certainly isn't THAT ab-tastic). Touko's butt and thighs are also nice and thick. She also shows, well, let's call it her “mound of venus”, due to having an open zipper. I did some research that involved looking through the raws of the further books (only the first of six has been translated) and I eventually came to two great points. The first is that she has measurements! Touko is 176 cm tall and her three sizes are 97/61/92. Again it is really unfortunate that she's so busty, and while I can forgive a difference of 5 the series really doesn't do her any favors as she's extremely busty and it shows. That said I do have to commend them somewhat for not falling into the 90 hip barrier and giving Touko a pretty sizable bottom. It looks really meaty which is awesome. Oddly enough her sister Ayana is even curvier if shorter (she's 160 cm and her measurements are 108/59/99. Curse you 100 hip barrier continuing to not be surpassed).
The second thing is that Touko's weak point is her butt.

: Wait what? I know teachers tend to have great butts but even then you don't hear about girls who have sensitive butts!

I know! And finding that out was one of the reasons that I felt inspired to do Touko's blog. And believe me, they do take advantage of it! Okay, so the anime is horribly mamocentric (to the point where one of Touko's butt shakes is part of a panoramic where she also jiggles her chest AND there's “oppai” written in English in the background behind her), but the manga is a bit more fair. A bit, but there are a few good scenes here and there, such as one point where she gets an enema or a sword hilt is shoved into her butt to make her lose a battle. There's even an omake where she considers using a beaded “toy” to play with herself. Sadly she gets caught and uses it to tease her sister instead. Overall, while helpful, these scenes don't take away from how much more attention her chest seems to get (or, more likely, her sister gets). Touko has a great body, but she could definitely use a bigger butt.
Grade: B

Breasts: Kagaku na Yatsura, the OVA, was made by Hoods. If you know that company you should know what's coming up. If you're not familiar with their work let's just say that they have a very signature style when it comes to chests. This means that Touko has a VERY meaty chest with extreme chest animation, to the point where shifting her weight is enough to cause a massive jiggle. And she also has the floppy sound effects which, while better than the “boing” sound effects almost every other studio uses, is still gross to me. If you can't tell, I should say outright that Touko has very big breasts, bordering on the “huge” category though her sister is definitely in that area. They're so meaty that, when she puts the lead's hand on her chest, it seems to melt into her massive flab. If only shows could do this with butts too (and Touko would have been a sexy example for that). I.. I did kinda like that, but still, my point holds that this art style has a lot of problems. As this series is an ecchi one (bordering HARD on hentai) Touko does show her nipples. Sadly they're quite large, as is another product of Hoods as her nipples seem better in the manga (they're extremely excessive in the anime while somewhat cute in the manga). As said before her chest size is 97 cm and she's an I cup. There's also a point in the anime where she gets slipped a potion of sensitivity and her breasts become the main target. Overall, while in another manga Touko's body may have worked Kagaku is a horrible series and I'll explain that further.
Grade: C+

: I imagine that Topaz is only grumpy because Ayana steals all the paizuri scenes for herself.

I won't comment on that fact...

: Bwahaha! What a pervert!

: Er, what's this "Pie-zuri"?

: Well, you see, it's like wearing a necktie or stethoscope but...

*Touko whispers in Hitomi's ear. The monoeye blushes and covers her face with her hands.*

: I-I see, I didn't realize that... er...

N-not that I want anything like that now! My blogs are clean as a whistle!

*Both Topaz and Hitomi are flustered.*

: A shame, I'd be up for it. And from the looks of things it seems YOU are as well, fufufu.

*Topaz covers his crotch with his hands.*

Sorry, it's just that talking about that put ideas in my head.

: C'mon, just let me and Hitomi "relieve" you!

: Don't talk for me, Touko! T-though it does sound like fun. But no, it's too perverted and I shouldn't take advantage of a patient...

: Both of you two need to take cold showers! Even you Hitomi, you're starting to drool!

*Hitomi wipes her mouth.*

: How very unbecoming of a teacher...

: Now, why don't you get back to that blog of yours?

I suppose I should. Hopefully it will help me calm down more.

Clothes: Touko has very little variety with her clothing. In fact the main reason I wanted to research the future chapters was to see if her outfits improve or not. The first outfit we see her with, and the only outfit used in the anime, involves her using her bandages as a sarashi. Though it's not extremely helpful as they're so tight that you can see her nipples through them. She also wears bandages on her thighs and shins. On bottom she wears very tiny red shorts, looking almost buruma-like though the open zipper in front and the fact she has a (undone) black belt shows that it's more than just that. She also keeps brown pockets like a holster around her hips, and she also wears a lab coat (though, unlike another lab coat school nurse Touko actually shows her butt). She also wears a pendant with a long crystal for even more chest focus. Fortunately this mostly-poor outfit is replaced in the eleventh chapter or so and on. Touko then wears a tied dark midriff-showing shirt, jeans with a thong under them, and a brown jacket instead of the lab coat. I approve of her improved top, being able to support her massive chest without showing her nipples, but it's a shame that her bottom changed so much. During one point in the story she also wears the student uniform which consists of a yellow vest, white shirt, and red skirt. Sadly it's not a very good uniform, as you can imagine. She also wears a witch's dress, with hat, for a chapter cover and at one point she wears a nice black bikini with thong (the O-ring part gets destroyed by a sword but she repairs it with her invisibility and tying a bandage in a bow). Her outfits, while revealing, are a bit too far for my tastes and especially when it comes to how mamocentric they are.
Grade: C+

Mind
Personality: Touko, as said earlier, is the older sister of Ayana who is one of the lead characters of the series. She came to the school as a nurse to help encourage her imouto to get with the male lead. Unfortunately she's not extremely well-defined. She's pretty lazy and careless, brushing off the effects of drugs on students. She's even a bit absent-minded as well. Still, she's skilled at creating drugs of varying effects and seems to be friends with a Dr. Wily-type villain.

: You shouldn't trust mysterious people who live in skull-shaped castles.

Certainly. As for Touko's voice she was done by Kumi Sakuma who was also Ciel and Lettuce so it seems she likes meganekkos, maybe. Overall, while there isn't anything bad about Touko the series isn't exactly great as it's obvious that it's a fanservice series. She suffers as a result, and I don't think having the additional books translated would help too much either.
Grade: C+

Libido: The series sucks for this area. To be fair I'll discuss Touko first as she's not too bad. Her libido is fairly high, teasing the lead and even saying she'll steal him away if the girls don't start pursuing him more. She also teases the other girls, including her sister, which is pretty nice and she tends to be in the lead most of the time. That said the series is HORRIBLE as far as fanservice goes. Seriously, it's a surprise when a chapter doesn't have some type of mass groping or something. And I don't just mean something like smooth tentacles either, every thing is disgusting and bumpy or gooey, it's just a gross manga in general. Between Ayana's animals, Airi's machines (Airi is the lolier lead female), and just general antics it's as if the creator has some type of fetish for the grossest things. It's not just femsub, this is ADVANCED femsub! To compare it to a more well-known series of TLR Darkness, it would be like if every chapter contained Lala's machines groping the girls, Nana's animals going into heat an having huge disgusting suction-cup tentacle hands, or Momo's plants getting out of hand with vines. And that's not even counting the general gangrape-ish scenes, like if Momo's fanclub suddenly decided they were all going to fondle her. Oh and most of the girls have outlandishly huge breasts (and, considering Darkness isn't exactly non-mamocentric itself, that's saying a lot). It goes way past “sexy”, past “eww”, and goes into horrible “disgusting” and "barf-causing" areas quite a bit. I regret reading it, but I don't want to blame it on Touko herself. I will mention that she practically gets raped by a minotaur in the OVA, in case you readers need more reason to avoid it.
Grade: B-

Age: I can't be sure about Touko's age. We do know that she's an older sister and a teacher so she's likely over 20, but other than that her age is unknown. The volume 6 omake does show her as “20” but I can't read Japanese so for all I know it could be a “Forever 17” situation. Only with 20 instead. She does use a youth potion at one point, making her younger and look like a student. In comparison the actual students became kids so I have to imagine that Touko lost 5-10 years like they did (though I can't be sure).
Grade: A-

Total Grades: 70
Average score: 7.8
Final Grade: B

And that's the blog for this week!

: Wait just a minute! How come Hitomi got a much better score than I did?

A lot of reasons. Mostly because she doesn't come from such a horrid series, and one I can actually read as well.

: Fufufu, Topaz prefers me...

*Hitomi blushes and covers her face with her hands.*

: Don't get too cozy! Now that Topaz is done doing both of your blogs we have to get going.

But am I strong enough?

: Sure, and since you did do a proper blog on me I guess I can't lin. Here, how about you take this.

*Touko hands Topaz a leather case. He opens it up to inspect it, and inside is a ton of vials.*

What are all these?

: Just a few experimental drugs I came up with, with a variety of effects. I think one's a genderswap potion, one's to make boobs humongous, one changes the age of people...

: Wow, it's like a smorgasbord of Zettai hatred!

Don't worry, I'll never use them.

: Go ahead, that's what they're there for-Wait, Zettai?

Yeah. You know him?

: No, but due to teaching science classes all over I have heard of a girl who has a older brother with that name. I remember as it stuck out. But speaking of which there are some potions based on her research. Something like a giantess potion, a butt-enhancing potion, and one that makes you fart and increases their stink! Of course, those only work on women.

: Yep, that sure sounds like Hiroko...

Wow, there's like a dozen or so vials in here! But they're not labelled. Which ones are which?

: How should I know. Like I said, these are experimental. I've forgotten what half of them do anyway.

Well, I guess by adventure game logic I should be thankful.

*Topaz slides the large case into his pocket. Fortunately the pocket dimension allows him to carry them.*

Thanks a lot, Touko. I'm sure I'll use them intelligently!

: And thanks for fixing Topaz up, you two.

: Ha ha ha, think nothing of it.

: It's always a good feeling to see people leave with a smile, even if they aren't students.

*Riri and Topaz wave and the two nurses wave back. The two bloggers then leave and walk down the hallway. Once they've left, Hitomi and Touko start talking.*

: I can't belive that you cured his affliction so quickly!

: I didn't.

: EH? B-but he doesn't think that anything is wrong with him!

: I gave him a month's worth of medication. He should be fine until November, and he won't be my problem then.

: And you call yourself a nurse. You phony hack!

: Heh, I don't mind being called names. Doesn't bother me a bit.

*Returning back to Topaz and Ririchiyo, the former clutches his heart a bit and slows down.*

: You feeling alright?

Y-yeah. I just need to catch my breath.

: Man, you're really out of shape. And that full moon is really creepy as it seems that we've stayed here until late. Come on, let's hurry out of here!

*Topaz sighs.*

I suppose that I should.

*Riri and Topaz run, with the loli running far faster. She runs around a corner and waits for Topaz to follow, but he doesn't.*

: T-Topaz? Now isn't the time to be fooling around. I swear, if you went back to those cows...Topaz?

*As she turns the corner and checks it seems that Topaz has disappeared and only his shoes remain...*