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I’ve never had an easy life when I was born the doctor tried to put me back in, but my mother stopped him by promising not to sue for leaving his watch in her uterus. When I was growing up I was picked on by the school bully, the school whore, the school nerd, and the janitor. After all the tribulation, justice was finally served in the form of a typhoon hitting the school. It killed the school bully, the school whore, the school nerd, and the lunch lady. (I have bad aim.) After this “accident” I went into the working world as a man dressed like a woman. My boss saw through this guise and was going to botch the whole deal, until he mysteriously died of a dragon bite. Then at the tender age of 32, I developed a case of massive paranoia, and went on a shooting spree. It took the entire Vineland city police department to subdue me, and only 37 officers we’re fatally wounded. I spent 2 years in prison because I pleaded insanity and here I am today, with nothing more then a belly full of bad memories, and a really nice watch with the inscription “The doctor is in.” I have tried to live my life to this credo.