Hokenshitsu de Aimashou

This is an anime that's so bad, it was actually difficult to track down. The only torrent of the video always stopped downloading at the last megabyte, as if worried that completing the download would install a gypsy curse on my computer. Nearly every archive of the video is either dead or behind a suspicious paywall. And, the cherry on top, I ultimately had more fun trying to find this obscure piece of forgotten media than I did actually watching it.

This is the only review that will likely ever be written for something this completely horrendous, and so allow me to do the solemn duty ... of explaining what you're not missing. Hokenshitsu de Aimashou is a hentai about some girl. She goes to the nurse's office because her deep, frothing sexual attraction to Generic Anime Brown Haired Boy is making it impossible to focus, and Blue Haired Nurse, either because she's negligent or because she's a cool lady who understands what a young woman needs, leaves her alone in the nurse's office so she can have vivd, but terribly animated fantasy sex with her love interest. But, what's this? Said love interest comes in to the nurse's office, and he's with another woman! Now they're fucking in the nurse's office, while the first girl is hiding, but wait! The nurse comes back and BUT WAIT! Now the gym teacher's here and BUT WAIT! Now there's a foursome happening in the middle of a school nurse's office between Blue Haired Nurse, Brown Haired Boy, Brown Haired Boy's Girlfriend and Muscle Coach, while the girl from the beginning just hangs out under the bed and cries a bit BUT WAIT! Muscle Coach is trying to make a move on Brown Haired Boy! That's nowhere near vanilla enough for this late 90's hentai! First girl saves the day, somehow, for which she receives the ultimate reward; no longer being in this stupid series.

Hokenshitsu de Aimashou is pure bargain bin material. The animators, to an almost fascinating degree, steadfastly refuse to do their job. Dialogue consists of still shots of characters rigidly standing in place, while their mouths play a looping three frame animation of a mouth opening and closing. The sex scenes largely consist of still images, with varous three-frame animation bits and bobs added in a style reminiscent of shitty point and click adventure game pop-in animations. Panning and tweening is used to suggest movement, at times, but only when the animators are feeling up to it. At regular intervals, the show awkardly splices in live action footage of real people having sex on top of a random matress. These interludes, as you might expect, are both the only well-animated thing in the entire show and generally have fuckall to do with the scenes they're placed in the middle of. The combined effect of all these cut corners and shortcuts is a show made by a company of people who quite clearly didn't care. Nothing about this program suggests even the slightest hint of artistry or investment; it's just a product, meant to be banged out and shipped as quickly as they could make it happen.

In short, do not bother finding this program. It's existence adds absolutely nothing to the space of hentai. Not even controversy, as some pieces manage to lean on. I give it a solid "panning back and forth in a way that might suggest thrusting if you squint" out of 10.