THE GCB

ONCE A YEAR, ALL THE MEMBERS MAKE A PILGRIMAGE TO MEET IN SECRET AT A SECRET LOCATION. ONCE EVERYONE IS GATHERED, ALL ARE STRIPPED NAKED AND HAVE OUR BODIES PAINTED WITH TRIBAL ART. WE THEN STAND IN A CIRCLE AROUND A 14 FOOT STATUE OF CLIVE OWEN AND WORSHIP FOR EXACTLY 4 HOURS, IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWED BY RIGOROUS MASTURBATION (STILL AROUND THE STATUE). AFTERWORDS, WE ALL GO HOME.