September 20th, 2022
Monk 101
Anime Relations: Pingu in the City
The world is deteriorating and becoming dumber every day. There exists only one cure to this madness! Throw away your worldly possessions and become a monk. This is a guide (with pictures)
Step 1: Learn about Buddhism
That's right! Put away your phones, stop fucking your
body pillows, and open up a book! Begin your path to
becoming a monk by understanding the basics about
Buddhism. Study the Eightfold Path, which is the way
to the end of all suffering. Learn the four noble truths,
which contain the essence of Buddhism.
Step 2: Find a monk sensei
Like most people out there, you're dumb, weak, ugly,
shallow, American, impulsive, inconsistent, unfaithful,
and the list goes on, which is why you need your very
own monk sensei! Learning from a mentor is a very
important first step in becoming a monk. One-on-one
instruction allows you to delve deeper into Buddhist
teachings and gain a more complete understanding of
what will be expected of you as a monk.
Step 3: Epic monk life
Before you enter the epic monk life and catch those dubs
every day, you must learn to control yourself, which you
will learn in the form of meditation. Becoming a Buddhist
monk requires daily meditation and a conscious effort to
change how the mind works. When you live in an abbey,
much of your day will be spent in meditation.
This takes practice.
Step 4: Get rid of your worldly possessions
You're no mere motal anymore. You are a monk. You don't
need your computer to jack off to anime girls, nor your slightly
stained body pillow which hasn't been washed since 2019,
you are now above the peasants and free to do as you please.
Monks live as mendicants, meaning they possess only what is
required for a very simple quality of life, nothing more.
Step 5: Realize your Buddhist clan is now your family
No more crying alone at night, you are now a super chad monk
with a huge monk family. Once you join a monastery, your life
will be devoted to your Buddhist community. Your days will be
spent in service of others, and your focus will be on those who
need your help. And together you shall dominate the world.
Step 1: Learn about Buddhism
That's right! Put away your phones, stop fucking your
body pillows, and open up a book! Begin your path to
becoming a monk by understanding the basics about
Buddhism. Study the Eightfold Path, which is the way
to the end of all suffering. Learn the four noble truths,
which contain the essence of Buddhism.
Step 2: Find a monk sensei
Like most people out there, you're dumb, weak, ugly,
shallow, American, impulsive, inconsistent, unfaithful,
and the list goes on, which is why you need your very
own monk sensei! Learning from a mentor is a very
important first step in becoming a monk. One-on-one
instruction allows you to delve deeper into Buddhist
teachings and gain a more complete understanding of
what will be expected of you as a monk.
Step 3: Epic monk life
Before you enter the epic monk life and catch those dubs
every day, you must learn to control yourself, which you
will learn in the form of meditation. Becoming a Buddhist
monk requires daily meditation and a conscious effort to
change how the mind works. When you live in an abbey,
much of your day will be spent in meditation.
This takes practice.
Step 4: Get rid of your worldly possessions
You're no mere motal anymore. You are a monk. You don't
need your computer to jack off to anime girls, nor your slightly
stained body pillow which hasn't been washed since 2019,
you are now above the peasants and free to do as you please.
Monks live as mendicants, meaning they possess only what is
required for a very simple quality of life, nothing more.
Step 5: Realize your Buddhist clan is now your family
No more crying alone at night, you are now a super chad monk
with a huge monk family. Once you join a monastery, your life
will be devoted to your Buddhist community. Your days will be
spent in service of others, and your focus will be on those who
need your help. And together you shall dominate the world.
Posted by Zeusico | Sep 20, 2022 5:01 AM | 0 comments