Dec 7, 2017
Dionkeykong (All reviews)
Hi guys and gals..Do you wanna know how it is to sit inside someone's ear and spend the rest of your bloody life doing nothing but just that?Well luckily for ya there is an anime called To Heart.

Word of warning,this review contains excitement and swearing and some really really graphic sadistic descriptions.With that onto the review of this...I dare not call it s@it cause that would be an insult to good s@it or even bad s@it..This has taken the idea of endless boredom and went all the way to 11 or 789 by the looks of things.

Stupid name,stupid anime,stupid stupid me for watching this shit without having a spoon around so i can slowly and painfully take my eyes out of their damn sockets.Honestly i'm not being captain dramatic,i wish i had the strength to cut my wrists and watch my blood dripping on the floor instead.It would be better to take a chainsaw,cut my leg and beat my self to death with it.THIS IS HOW BAD THIS FREAKING ABOMINATION IS.

And looking at the tags i have to wonder...Who in the name of all that's holyl thought this was a comedy?Who?A carcass perhaps?Someone with the aesthetics of one?Drama?I wish there was cause at least there would be something to indicate a sign of life.Romance?Seriously?That was Japan's idea of romance?Based on a game?????AHA now we're talking...Now it all begins to make sense..BASED ON A GAME...I should point out that i haven't played the game and i'm not going to either but i cannot begin to imagine what the game was like for this anime to be so freaking boring.

Story?No story whatsoever.Absolutely none at all.It's just the girl of the week thing where some girl has some trouble and our cast solves it.And it may sound somewhat interesting but trust me it's not.Cause the way the "drama" is delivered lacks in everything.And it has to do with the characters mostly.The way they're acting is like they force fed them sleeping pills and told them to go out there and do it.Every single movement every single word they utter is in slow motion.Get this for conversations..Someone says something,the other part hears it,then processes it in his brain,then he breathes,then he makes his head move,then his eyes,then one lip starts moving then the other then some breathing takes place and after one decade has passed he finally utters:"Huh......."....Kinda like watching an old man with arthritis getting up from his chair.It's slow and painful....And come to think of it they can't even be described as characters but to hell with it i'm feeling generous today.

Mins into the first ep,that is the very first,the intro,the one to sing the blues...And what do we get?A male MC who is sleepy..And stays that way for the rest of the series.A sleepy character who wonders what the hell he's doing there in the first place.The female MC has no characteristics so to speak.It's just the girl with her red hair following around the male MC for some reason science hasn't STILL found an explanation for.And if you think this cannot possibly get any worse.....Oh wait for it..They have a scene where for,i think,10 mins they show a scene of 2 characters ripping a piece of paper..Yup just that and only that.And that was just for seating arrangements..10 mins of the same thing over and over and ov......Zzzzzzzz.

Yes you might say,but this is Slice of Life...Yeah but if the slice of that life is as boring as watching footage of flowers growing in slow motion then what's the freaking point?I can watch my nails grow for that matter.But that was the 1st ep right?What about the next..Oh they stepped things up by showing Akari the female MC brushing her teeth for what felt like an eternity.Oh and get this...We come to learn that her dream was to sit next to the male MC whose name i can't be bothered to remember..Her dream....To sit next to.....Him........Her dream...Not going to space or save 3rd world countries...How much do you want to see that?You're probably on the floor squealing like a pig in heat..

Animation and music where...Well rubish.What did you expect from late 90's anime?It's dreadful.

All in all there were 1 or 2 things good with it.Well there had to be really.Nobody can make an anime where absolutely everything is shit from top to bottom.That said even these 1 or 2 things couldn't keep me awake.I started watching this 11 years ago and midway through i was fast asleep for 2 years.11 years later i finally managed to finish it.And was it worth?Yeah i finally slept like a baby bear but also lost my youth.Is that a price worth paying for?Abso-fuckin-lutely not.Just watch something else.Watch Boku no Pico.Be disgusted not brain dead.