I originally decided to watch Rozen Maiden because lots of people on a certain popular anime review site seemed to think it was great. After all the positive comments, I checked out the site's review of the series, and it was described as 'gothic horror', with advice to not be put off by the focus on dolls. Sadly, Rozen Maiden is in no way a horror, or even gothic (except for the clothing of the dolls, and I'm sure I don't need to tell you that gothic costumes don't make for overall gothicness). The review was right about one thing, though: you shouldn't be put off by the fact that the series is about dolls. What should put you off is the actual characters of those dolls.
I'll start with the good points:
Rozen Maiden is reasonably pretty. The human characters seem to have been deprived of some attention on the design front, but at least Jun isn't a pretty boy. The dolls themselves are quite well designed and their costumes appear to have received more work than any other visual element. Also, Sinku's rose petal flurries are quite well done, looking both elegant and well animated.
Aside from the visuals, the best feature of the whole thing is the villain of the piece, a larger, more powerful and more adult-looking doll called Suigintou. There isn't a whole lot of depth to Suigintou, but that's true of all the characters. The reason for her evil deeds only comes to light in the dying minutes of the final episode, and it's no great shock. Nonetheless, Suigintou serves her purpose in the plot well enough, and she has the honour of being the only character who didn't get on my nerves at any point (with the exception of Souseiseki, who didn't annoy me because she appeared late, said and did almost nothing, and was totally devoid of personality or distinguishing features. She could have been a chair for all the impression she made).
That's all the good out of the way. Now onto the bad:
The first and largest complaint I'm going to make about this series is the characters. Oh god, the characters! In the very first episode, Jun, the 'hero', is revealed to be a self-centred, self-pitying layabout of a teenager, who makes his sister's life a misery by constantly ordering tat online and immediately making his long-suffering sibling take it to the post office so he can return it. You see, Jun doesn't leave the house. Not because he's ill or anything though. Oh no. He stays at home all day, every day, because he doesn't want to go to school. That's it. For no apparent reason, Jun and his sister (whose name eludes me) have absentee parents, so it's up to her to care for her brother. I'd feel some sympathy for her plight, particularly in light of the way Jun treats her, if it wasn't for the fact that she's a simpering, spineless wuss.
And we haven't even got to the dolls yet. The main doll, Sinku, initially earns some points from me by slapping Jun almost the instant she meets him. Unfortunately,despite her continuing to treat him roughly throughout the series, it's made very clear that she thinks he has some hidden quality inside that makes him a better person than everyone else. Ho hum. Other dolls proceed to arrive after Sinku, and they are all, frankly, rubbish. Every doll looks like a child (except Suigintou, who looks a bit more adolescent) but Hina is the most child-like of the lot - and not only in appearance. She is essentially a shrill brat. That's all you need to know about her, and indeed all there is to know. Suseiseki is alright at first, being aloof and detached from the others, but soon becomes something of a foil for Hina; she is just as childish as Hina, but tends to have opposing goals. As I mentioned above, Suseiseki's confusingly-monikered twin sister, Souseiseki, has no character and no personality, so let's skip her. There are various other dolls in existence, but none of them make an appearance.
Now to the plot. The plot is, frankly, poor. In the first half a dozen episodes, there are occasional implications of a larger plot, with vague mentions of 'the Alice game' and one or two menacing appearances by Suigintou, but that's all. Nothing much (aside from some irritatingly harem-comedy-esque incidents, which are disturbing since the dolls look like children and Hina in particular looks no older than five or six) happens until episode six, at which point Suigintou starts her kidnapping and attacks in earnest. This is not a good thing for a series that's twelve episodes long. The first half of the series is nothing but filler. Episode six may, in fact, be the best episode of the whole series - it manages to be reasonably enjoyable and not annoy too much. Once the plot does get going, still nothing much happens. Jun comes to realise that he cares about Sinku and the others, and discovers he's a git. Sinku vaguely owns up to holding Jun in some regard despite her rough treatment of him. And that's about it. Suigintou gets her comeuppance at Sinku's hands, but it's unsatisfying and pointless. Previously, Suigintou has been far more powerful than the other dolls, but suddenly Sinku is far more powerful than she is. The whole thing hinges on Jun's previously all but unmentioned sewing skill. Apparently his knack for sewing broken dolls back together makes Sinku strong enough to defeat Suigintou. Yes... The Alice game itself is never finished, and nothing much is resolved. Ho hum again.
I'll make a brief mention of the sound while I'm here. I was actually quite excited about the music when I first started watching Rozen Maiden. The opening theme is annoying (though it becomes less so with time) but most of the incidental music has a faux-classical sound, which is nice. Unfortunately, the choice of music is usually at odds with whatever is going on in the series. Chamber-style classical music suggests an entirely different type of series. There is one piece of background music that tends to play whenever Sinku gets the upper hand in a battle with Suigintou, and that's actually quite good - a stirring little melody that reminds me of RPG boss fights, with soft rock guitar and drums overlaid by strings/string-like keyboards. I ended up watching battle scenes more than once, just to hear that tune.
All in all, then, Rozen Maiden isn't really worth bothering with. The rating I gave it might confuse you now you've read all my complaints, but the truth is Rozen Maiden isn't bad, as such - just weak. Simple, shallow, predictable plot that never goes anywhere; annoying characters; nice but inappropriate music... Episode six onwards is an average semi-action affair, enjoyable enough but nothing special; episodes one to five are filler. I hated the first half and didn't mind the second half, so I've given it a six overall. Could be worse, could be a lot better.
