Side Note: If I misspell the names, don't flame me. Kamachi has weird names, and there're different spellings everywhere. Funimation spells it one way, wikis and other sources spell it another, you get the gist of it.
Story: As the world has gone through drastic changes in the world of Heavy Object. Due to the introduction of a new war machine called 'Objects', gigantic nuclear powered spheres with all kinds of weapons attached to them, the world has now been split into four world powers, each representing a different aspect of humanity that is considered important, the Legitimacy Kingdom, the Information Alliance, the Capitalist Corporations, and the Faith Organization. It is here where we follow the story of Qwenther Barbotage, an aspiring Object engineer who learns the true meaning of war as he fights against objects.
Side Note: Can I just say how hilarious the idea of fighting an object actually is? I just imagine someone screaming "RUN! IT'S AN OBJECT!" Cause quite honestly, that is the most non-descriptive thing you can say about a rampaging war machine. It's fabulous. Now back to the actual review.
Heavy Object in its simplest explanation is destroying objects. That's basically it. The entire show revolves around Qwenther and his buddy Havia, a radar analyst, essentially just derping around on the battlefield, figuring out on the top of their heads how to rout an object to the point that they win the battle with the enemy object destroyed. It's a very repetitive story that's only interesting because every new object is different and our bumbling idiots have to work out a different strategy every time, usually involving something to do with the main object of the series, the 'Baby Magnum.' (Don't ask why it's named that, just roll with it.) With such a simplistic story, there are bound to be flaws, and Heavy Object has that in spades.
One of the most glaring issues about Heavy Object is its sheer lack of anything else. While yes the show focuses more on the in-battle aspect of war, there're also moments in the show that tackle the underground politics or negotiation side of war, which we really don't get to see. Because of that, anything motive as to why they are fighting the specific object at the time goes largely unexplained or with so little information that they might as well not be saying anything at all. As a result of this, character, particularly villain motivation, is rather absent, and we're just sort of left with a 'boom, boom, pow' anime without really all that much substance behind it.
Overall, Heavy Object's story isn't really much to talk about. It has a lot of missing details to convey a proper story, and all of the screentime is devoted solely to the battles that are going on without much aftermath or any background information to go with it. It's all just mindless battles between giant ball things that shoot and destroy literally everything that they come in contact with. (I think they leveled a mountain one time...)
Overview:
+ Boom, Pow, ACTION!
- Not really much else
Characters: Similarly, characters in this show are really only heavily focused if they're on the frontlines due to the way that the show is structured. As such, characters who are more or less always in the action like our main characters get more attention, while those who work in the sidelines or behind the scenes don't.
First, there's Qwenther Barbatoge and Havia Winchell, the main characters of Heavy Object. Smart when it comes to engineering and war tactics and idiot when it comes to practically everything else, Qwenther and Havia act as carbon copied clones of one another, with their only differences coming from where each of them come from and what each of them expertise in, these two bumbling idiots really don't have much in terms of defining one from another, further solidified from the fact that neither of them really get much character development.
Then we have Milinda Brantini, the pilot of the main object of the series, the 'Baby Magnum'. As an Object Elite, someone who controls and mans the gigantic ball of death, and a princess of the Legitimate Kingdom, Milinda's role as a character is quite...limited. While yes, she is the pilot of the Object, the amount of time that we dedicate to her and her purpose in this war is staggeringly low when you compare it to how often we see Havia and Qwenther talk about their personal porn collections. The show doesn't put much attention to her (much like pretty much everything else in this series) and as such, makes it really hard to define her as a character. And that is not a good thing.
Froyletia Capistrano is the last character of major importance in this series. As leading commander over the Battalion that Qwenther and Havia are a part of, Froyletia takes on the role as more or less the ringleader of this group of characters, making sure that every plan goes to order and that they accomplish whatever the plot wants them to accomplish. Out of all of the characters, Froyletia is the one that gets the most development. Mostly due to the fact that she's the only character to get any time devoted to her backstory, but it's still development nonetheless.
And everyone else is basically spare blood or just relevant to the plot. For the most part, they're just relevant to the plot and don't get any time invested in them whatsoever, but there are like...1 or 2 rare cases (Baa-chan and the Ohoho in this case) that have more to them than just enemy or friendly characters.
Overview:
+ Character development on Froyletia
- Main characters are static and underdeveloped
- Side characters are basically spare blood
Art: The art for Heavy Object is...mediocre at best. The animation isn't really all that stellar and dips in quality depending on what exactly is being shown in the picture. In terms of character designs, they're decent. In terms of background, they're also, just decent. In terms of the objects, well, they're CGI monstrosities that aren't actually as bad as I thought. And when it comes to water, well, it's terrible. Terrible water is terrible.
And because the show has ecchi, I'm gonna have to talk about that aspect. (Oh boy.) Heavy Object has quite a bit of ecchi for a show that's not really about sexual aspects. Due to our two main bumbling idiots being complete pervs and holding hoards upon hoards of porn, and Froyletia having a model body, well, you can kind of see where I'm going with this. They poke fun at it every now and then, and it kind of flows with the story. Sort of. It's not as heavy as it could've been, but they do take advantage of it as much as they can.
Overview:
+/- Wavering quality art
+/- Ecchi is present, but not TOO present
Sound: Being a 2-cour series, Heavy Object has two OPs and EDs in order to accompany the respective parts. The OPs for both sides have rock songs to elevate the feeling of action, when really, they're just sort of generic and fade away in a slew of other generic songs.
The EDs on the other hand have a completely opposite feeling to them, as they're more or less these cheerful and happy songs that really...don't match with the feeling of WAR AND DESTRUCTION that this show so often shows us. Personally, I don't find any of these tracks special and are completely skippable since they really have no true merit to them or any real way of standing out.
Overview:
+/- Kinda meh OST
Personal Enjoyment: Going into this series, I was skeptical. Mechas aren't usually my cup of tea when it comes to anime, and seeing gigantic balls tread around a field firing bullets at literally everything...yeah, I wasn't exactly the most keen about it. (I was kinda pressured into watching it. Kind of.) And at the end, well, I can safely say that it was terrible, but not as bad as I thought it would be. Would I watch it again? Hell no. Would I say it should burn in the pits of hell? Well...no...but kinda.
Did I enjoy this anime?
This one is a bit half and half, seeing as how the two bumbling idiots were honestly quite entertaining at times. The sheer amount of antics those two get into on a per hourly basis is sometimes so bullshit you can't help but laugh at them.
What didn't I like about this anime?
An entire section of the story was missing. Because you don't get a feel for the politics that go around with the story, the central reason why these gigantic balls of death even fight each other really isn't there and it just breaks continuity in a way that it doesn't feel enjoyable to watch since the show only plans for what is happening right now, rather than what is happening beforehand and after that.
Would I recommend this anime?
Like guns? Like explosions? Like random fanservice moments every now and then without having to think too too hard as to what is happening now? Watch Heavy Object. That's about all it's worth for. If not, well, skip it. That's my personal recommendation, see you in the next one.
