May 11, 2016
Have you ever hated something so much you went out of the way to hate it? If this sentence makes you judge me, you're probably right in doing so.
After all, if I really hate it that much, then I should just go watch something else. And I probably should. Regardless, it's gotten to the point that I derive some sort of twisted happiness from watching and hating this show. It's pitiful, to be honest.
But enough about my failure to act rationally.
Why do I have such a hate boner for this anime? Why do I go out of my way to hate it?
I hate it for
...
a lot of reasons. If I got into all of them, you'd probably close this review. So I'll keep it simple.
Asterisk is a simple show. The Strongest Man To Ever Grace Our Good Earth With His Gorgeous Looks And Massive Penis arrives at a high school where students battle for ranking to determine status. He quickly assembles a harem of girls who fight to see who gets to sit on his crotch, has a roommate capable of spouting exposition like a broken sewer pipe, and always saves the day in the nick of time, and defeats all his enemies handily while making them reconsider their lives, despite his Dark And Secret Past. And shit, that's just the first season!
The second season delivers more of the same. Ayato's harem expands, and the only thing limiting his strength is removed nearly immediately.
And the first sentence there highlights the problem- it's more of the same. Normally that's not a bad thing, but in Asterisk's case it's bad because it doesn't want to expand on anything. It's completely comfortable with what it did, so it doesn't see a need to do anything else. Its "more of the same" isn't "the story and characters you loved, bigger and better" it's "cut and paste everything from last season, and hope that no one notices". Ayato is still a paper thin excuse for a character created so that you can project yourself on to him. Julis is still a tsundere trope rather than a character. Kirin and Saya are still just there to be in love with Ayato, and Claudia still only exists to proposition Ayato for sex and pull a convenient way to advance the plot out of her ass.
I hate Asterisk for what it stands for. The popularity of Asterisk promotes the making of anime that follows a formula, and has minimal effort put in because they know that it will sell. Asterisk takes no risks and contributes nothing. Its fight scenes aren't exciting. Its story and characters don't give any reason to care or feel for them. It's the Best Bits of anime- something for everyone. There's high school, tournament fights, power ups, cute girls, a Sci Fi setting, and the good guys fighting for the greater good. But this all falls flat because while it has all of these things, it fails to do them well. I preferred Julis when she was Taiga Aisaka. I preferred Saya when she was Yuki Nagato. I preferred the high school battles better in Kill la Kill. I preferred power ups in Gurren Lagann. I preferred the Sci Fi setting in Psycho Pass. Despite having all sorts of things I love, Asterisk falls flat because it doesn't do them right.
You can tell me that it's just not to my taste. That Asterisk wasn't targeted towards me. Honestly, you may be right. But that's beside the point. The point being that Asterisk War most definitely sucks.
Reviewer’s Rating: 1
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