Back to ItsMyCoffeeBreak's Profile ItsMyCoffeeBreak's Profile

***This review MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS***

This is the story of how an STD spreads.

School Days is basically if someone took random chunks of The Bachelor, Jersey Shore, and When They Cry, and shoved them all into a blender where they're continuously pulsed on the highest setting for a good twenty minutes. It makes an interesting puree with this delectable consistency of all things trash, adolescent romance, and large shiny kitchen knives. You need to have a real exquisite palate to enjoy this tasty psychotic soap opera/high school slice of life animu.

Let's start off with some characters, shall we? All of the characters in this show are ... either: 1. Complete and utter Trash, 2. Just a little psycho, or 3. A full on psychopath. You'll watch some characters go through one or two stages, but most of the main characters are a package of all three at once. If you're a female in this show, it is your destiny to be filled with this uncontrollable urge to ride Makoto's dick every waking moment of your life (unless you're Nanami- then you're just a bitch). Makoto's influence on everything that has either boobs or a vagina in this school reminded me a lot of The Bachelor- except that unlike The Bachelor, I don't think Makoto has any cha-ching to make up for his missing brain cells, not to mention his drab, colorless personality.

In fact, that's one of the many mysteries that I was left with after watching through all twelve episodes and it still baffles me to this day. Why were all these school girls so dang crazy over this worthless sack of balls? What was it about Makoto that had every girl soaking with this anxious anticipation of receiving just one more text from our spineless MC? What was he hiding off screen? There must have been something about Makoto that we couldn't see that was making every single girl react this way. What was he hiding from us? And then… it hit me.

Makoto's got a double-dick.

That's the only explanation for it. Makoto has two dicks- that's why girls are so crazy over him! Why girls are so willing to look past his idiocy and his cheating cheater cheatiness! That's our missing puzzle piece: the ONLY reason why Makoto was so desirable in School Days was because he was King Double-Dicks this Whole. Entire. Time.

It explains everything. It explains why every single girl in this show (except for Nanami- you bitch) has this crazy love for King DD, why they are so willing to put up with his DIRTY CHEATING ASS even though he fucks anything that walks as long as it has some sort of oppai. It even explains why he slept with almost every single female at his school and why he couldn’t just stop at two girls alone- he literally couldn’t keep it in pants for more than an episode or else the dual-erections would kill him. It even answers the age-old question of why the romance between King DD and Kotonoha was so special- it was all because Kotonoha loved him for more than just his dick(s). Kotonoha’s love for King DD was so pure and true because she loved him for just being Makoto, and she kept loving him even though she had to wait eleven whole episodes to get what practically every other girl was getting before her. That’s even why our last moments with Kotonoha are seeing her hugging Makoto’s head at the end- she just loves Makoto

OH

SO

MUCH.




Real talk this time:

This show was a great parody of the harem/high school/slice of life genre. Even though I HATED almost every single character in this show, I enjoyed watching how fast all of their lives dwindled all because one stupid guy wasn’t brave enough to break up with a girl he was already cheating on- down twofold. Makoto is a dick and even though watching him was painful and cringe-inducing 99% of the time, THAT ENDING totally made all of the pain worth it at the end. Speaking of things that aren’t as psychotic, the music in this series is fantastic- you’ve got that poppy, playful la-de-da that plays during typical SoL moments, but then we also get the slamming of random keys during tragic moments by the stairs. Big kudos to whoever was in charge of the sound direction in this one.

However… Even though this show was great for its psychological parts, I was still a little bothered by how many times each episode focuses on either Kotonoha’s boobs or Sekai’s undies at any given moment. The fan service in this show really holds it back as it keeps the serious parts from making as big of an impact as they would without it. Normally I wouldn’t care if there was just some fan service, but I know it’s a problem when I can remember exactly how Kotonoha’s cleavage and Sekai’s ass looked without even wanting to (...please send help). We’re supposed to sympathize for both of Kotonoha and Sekai’s characters based off of how horrible King Monster Dick treats and undermines both of them, but that sympathy gets questionable when School Days still decides to treat them in the usual fan servicey way. It makes me wonder if maybe the fan service is also a part of the parody in this series- maybe the point is that every viewer that enjoyed seeing this part of Kotonoha and Sekai was actually no better than Makoto. That would have made the ending even more personal at the end. Or maybe it was just fan service for the sake of fan service- because, after all, this IS listed as a harem/drama/school romance.

This is the story of how your average high school boy saves the world by spreading his seed.

Conception is an isekai made for viewers who just want to sit back and jack off without any actual hentai on hand (HOW UNFORTUNATE!). The story starts with typical protag, named Itsuki, being whisked away to the world of Granvania after his cousin tells him that she's preggers after spending three years doing "all sorts of stuff" together. As per se, Granvania is ravaged by a great evil that only Visitors like Itsuki can save them from by creating 12 Star Children with 12 Star Maidens. How are ... these Star Children created, you ask?

How do you think?

This show knows its audience, and they actual do it pretty well without breaking into hentai land. Can't stand staring at girls' faces while they talk? This show has them talking out of their ass instead. Even the opening just consists of nothing but bits of shadowy missionary positions and shiny ass cheeks. When MC gets transported to another world with his cousin, you see Itsuki's whole entire body being sucked in while his cousin just gets a skirt shot- NO PANTY SHOTS FOR YOU! (at least, not yet)

Feeling 50 Shades of Greyish? Check out the perverted mascot, Red Bondage Panda Raccoon thing. He's annoying but he likes watching people get frisky- what more could you want?

Would this show do better as an actual hentai, you ask? Well yes- absolutely yes. But the fact that it's not doesn't stop it from being ridiculously entertaining, whether it be laughing your bottom off at all the virgin sex, or just making you say "wtf am I watching?" an eyebrow raising amount of times over this life changing animu.