Hidoku Shinaide
Don't Be Cruel

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Updated 06/2020
There's now 60+ chapters so it's time for an update to this review!

At first glance, it starts with the typical yaoi starter: r*pe. In this case, blackmail. Nemugasa is so emotionally and physically abused it makes me wonder HOW did this relationship start and how the HECK did it become like it is today. But as much as I HATE this, the character development is very flushed out and developed enough for me to let it slide.

Now for the art. When I first wrote this review (IN 2014??!!) I said the art was "hot" but "hot" isn't enough to describe the art. ... Going back to the beginning to catch up with the recent releases, I can physically SEE and FEEL the improvements and maturing of the art that directly translates to the maturing of the two main characters, Maya and Nemugasa.

I really enjoy the realistic depiction of the stress of taking college exams and trying to get into the school of their choice while maintaining a relationship. There's a lot of juggling around with rash decisions, sacrifices, losing sleep to study, having your future being decided in one moment... These are things that a lot of people can relate with. And when you thought the story ends when they graduate high school... it doesn't stop there! Enter college, with new struggles!
Before, I had rated this a 9 however, further into the story there's drama and misunderstandings in every volume which became exhausting especially for binge reading.
I was tempted to drop it to 7 HOWEVER there was a moment later in the manga that made me stop and think about lgbt experiences are like in Japan. I wish I could talk more about it but... that would be going into spoilers.

Maybe it's the fact that the characters feel like they're maturing or because it's been so long I matured, that this manga... resonates... with me more than I thought it would. I hope I was able to convey how much I enjoy this manga without giving away too much. And please give this manga a chance. Even if the beginning sucks.


(07/2014)
I have finally lost track on the amount of times I have reread this manga and everything single time, it has left me crying AGAIN AND AGAIN! I keep on promising myself to write a review but everytime I end up reading the manga all over again.

At first glance, It starts with the typical yaoi starter: r*pe. In this case, blackmail (like we've never seen that one yet). But above all else, the character development is what really sets itself apart from most yaoi.

Let me tell you a thing. The art in this is ABSOLUTELY ADORABLY AMAZING!!! It's detailed yet cute in a way that cute can become sexy and sexy to HOT (chibis are adorable too!)

I mentioned before character development. It's (or at least I think) realistic with the whole dealing with a relationship both being the lover and the loved one and the stress of the future after highschool and into adulthood.

I have read and reread this manga x times and I keep falling in love all over again.

Why would you not read it?
It's funny, adorable, sexy, meaningful, and heartwarming.
Now GO AND READ IT

This manga was written by Nekota sensei, one of my favorite mangakas, so I must admit I had a few expectations coming into this, and as Nekota says, if you have high expectations, the disappointment it much greater.
Of course the art is beautiful, and the dialogue is cute and funny, and the characters are likable. Yet, as I've come to appreciate sensei's story-telling skills, this manga was a great disappointment. I have just finished reading all the available volumes, and frankly, I am so underwhelmed it is rather overwhelming.

Actually, even a 6 feels too lenient a score. The only reason I've decided to give Hidoku ... Shinaide a 6 is that there's no question that sensei is a talented and clever artist.

I wanted to mention, while I did not like the manga, I've read all the related doujinshi and really enjoyed them. I think it's because I could pretend they were a separate story, and there's no denying this mangaka's characters are super cute.

I have strived to keep this review spoiler free. However, I do discuss several tropes that the mangaka makes use of, and that could give one the sense of the storyline.

I often read in reviews that people did not like the main couple, and vastly preferred the side characters; however, this is the first manga I have ever read that made me feel this way. From the beginning, I completely disliked Maya and Nemugasa. I wish I could say that they redeemed themselves as the story evolved, as characters often do in the yaoi genre, but if anything I felt these guys slowly devolved (and I mean slowly - this manga feels like it never ends! I can't believe I'm saying such a thing about one of Nekota sensei's works. I'm upset with her for making me say something so awful).
To begin with, our two main characters are introduced with my least favorite of all yaoi tropes - a rape scene. There are yaois that handle this trope well (see Totally Captivated). This manga did not. Instead, sensei chose to use rape as a legitimate commencement for a romantic relationship. This is often done in yaoi, but generally the mangas that use this trope in such a manner are short and shallow, and as readers we are not expected to get all that attached to the characters. However, Hidoku Shinaide is very long and drawn out, and so the reader (supposedly) gets rather attached to the protagonists.
The manga chould have at least addressed the event and portrayed its ramifications on the boys' relationship. However, all I got from the story was a sour taste throughout. The reader cannot even pretend that Nemugasa was just saying "no" and "stop" to be cute or whatever the reason ukes are always shouting "no" during sex. But Nemugasa very clearly does not want it when he describes what is happening to Akira, and the one time the rape scene is mentioned between the couple, Nemugasa states that it is a very bad memory.
In addition to a sour taste, the sexual assault created a very weird inconsistency in Maya's character. He's supposed to be a delinquent or something, but his one transgression (albeit, a ruinous one) is his sexual abuse of Nemugasa, and that lasts about one chapter. The purpose of making Maya rape Nemu completely evades me. I do not understand what it was supposed to acheive or add to his character. Yes, the other characters mention how Maya's personality underwent a transformation, and Maya tells Nemu that Nemu has changed his life; however, this character transformation from a rapist to a kind, respectful person is so abrupt and unexplained, it left me dizzy. Moreover, since the only social interaction we see Maya having before he undergoes his "transformation" is the sexual assault, the mangaka did not provide us with an initial personality to have a transformation upon.
As for Nemu, he's just a stereotypical uke. Clumsy, absent-minded, socially-inept, short and thin, bookwormish. And he has no character development whatsoever, unless the Stockholm-syndrome-esque feelings he develops for Maya count. All in all, he had no redeemable characteristics.
Every interaction between these two felt rehearsed and cliched, and the entire time I had the sense that I've read this manga before.
All around, a disappointing story (hehe, I know I've used this word quite a few times now, but I think if I repeat it enough, it might help me get over my disappointment).

As for the other stories, there are several oneshots in the first volume that were pretty cute, and I was happy to escape the Mayanemu pairing, but they were not particularly noteworthy.
The relationship I really enjoyed reading about was Akira and Shimikawa's relationship. I love Nekota sensei's tutors, they absolutely rock, and Akira is no exception. Unlike Maya/Nemu, Akira has a mature story, and I think that the mangaka could have done so much more with this character. This manga should have been Akira's story, with Maya and Nemugasa as side characters.
Akira's history with his teacher was an original take on the sensei/student trope, and his relationship with Jutta, his brother, is terrifying. I hope Nekota sensei writes more chapters dealing with this relationship and allows Akira to escape from his brother's control. I also liked Shimikawa, since he came across as a mature, calm character. However, I feel like I missed out on a chapter or two from the 5th volume (can't find them anywhere!). In the last chapter I could find, it appears a new character has been introduced (Ruka san? Who is this guy?), and that Shimikawa has forced himself on Nemu (again with this stuff?), so I'm confused and am not sure what to think of Shimikawa.

All in all, while I adore sensei's style (she's quite obsessed with her semes sticking their tongue out during sex. I'm not sure how I feel about that), I'm afraid I cannot recommend this manga. I feel truly awful saying this, but I'm just glad to be done with it. However, if you would like to read some of Nekota sensei's great work, Otona Keikenchi and its sequels were adorable.

Speaking of Otona Keikenchi, there was a crossover between Hidoku Shinaide and Mousou Elektel (a sequel of Otona Keikenchi) featured in this manga that also had me confused. I think there is an implied history between Maya and Fumi (Fumi blushes when they meet), but its never explained. This manga left me with so many questions and so few answers.

So, before I start this review, let me make one thing clear: I like non-con. I like plenty of suffering and rape, I like all kinds of taboo subjects from incest to necrophilia. The rape at the start didn't turn me off (heck it's what got me in) what makes me really dislike most of the manga are Maya and Nemu.

I wouldn't say that I "hate" this manga, I just- I hate the main characters so goddamn much. (But I can't help but like them either...?)

It was really difficult to reread this series in full knowing just how absolutely stupid and melodramatic Maya and Nemu ... are. If I had to choose something to compare their relationship with; it would be messy spaghetti flowing endlessly onto the floor.

Let's start off with Maya:
What an absolute fuck boy. In the first three volumes I haaaaaaated Maya upon a first read (and second) because- wow, what in the actual hell is going on in his head.

So: imagine this.

You are in love with a nerdy student who doesn't pay much attention to you. One day you catch them cheating on a test and use that info to blackmail them into a relationship. I repeat; blackmail them.

Throughout that "relationship" you force them to have sex with you on a near daily basis. They start warming to you due to a strange sense of stockholm syndrome (I guess? god idk Nemu is a mess too) and start to see you as a friend.

However; exams are coming up and they really really need to focus on studying so they don't fail this very important test that could lead to them repeating the year or make it difficult to get into a good college.

Now tell me dear reader, how would you react to this as a fellow student and their lover:

A. Understand what your lover is going through and back off a bit or legitimatly help them study (instead of it turning into sex again) and making your lover aware that you care about them as a person and not as an object for your affection.

B. Get a little peeved off and pissy but still get that this test is important to your lover and afterwards apologize to them, making it clear that you truly do love them.

Or C. rape them on a day of a mock exam and purposefully make them be late for it because you're possesive fuckboy who'd afterwards be surprised that they're mad at you because you're a manchild who can't understand that your lover isn't a toy but a person with their own interests and ideals.

...Yeah.

He gets...Better? And even apologizes for how awful their relationship started. But the spaghetti doesn't stop spilling out of his pockets and his possesiveness is still a problem later on.

Now let's move on to Nemu. Nemu is so dramatic and irrational that you just wanna rip your hair out at how just nothing he does makes sense.

He:
-Forgives Nemu for raping him with no apology needed.

-Constantly enables Maya's possesiveness and overly jealous actions despite them often putting their now somewhat healthy relationship at risk.

-Immediatly is the one to throw in the towel and apologizes to Maya even when it is clearly not his fault and he was right to get angry.

and in general just; doesn't seem to have a single itsy bitsy little drop of self worth for the majority of the manga. He constantly relies on Maya and feeds from his hand when at the same time he gets so many emotional melt downs over the smallests of things because he knows what Maya is like.

He acts rather toxic at times too, but everytime it seems justified because Maya was toxic before or acts twice as awful afterwards.

Toxicity breeds more toxicity however, and by volume 9 I was just so exhausted and wanted them to break up. Yes, even after that heartfelt reunion scene. I felt absolutely nothing during that scene.

So yeah,

I hope you can understand why I hate the characters.

However at the same time I want these boys to just be happy already, to finally see a therapist or go to couple counseling instead of bottling up their emotions over and over and goddamn over again jesus fuCKING CHRIST JUST HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH EACHOTHER SO MUCH UNNECESARY DRAMA COULD'VE BEEN AVOIDED.

The art is really good and only gets better over the volumes, eventually the two idiots do show a sense of character growth and maturity (until they revert back). The Yasashiku half is a joy to read. Ruka is really interesting and my favourite character. (says alot about me, huh?)

It's a real love hate relationship for me when it comes to this manga.

Would I reccomend it? Absolutely not.

Because once you get into it, even if you feel the same as me, the drama pulls you back in over and over even though you know it'll just be rince and repeat.