Aono-kun ni Sawaritai kara Shinitai
I Want to Hold Aono-kun so Badly I Could Die

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my first ever review, here i go!

A blend of dark romance, horror, mystery, and comedy. which are my favorite genres to read. aono-kun no sawaritai kara shinitai did an amazing job in blending those genres together in story and art, the transmission from a genre moment into a different genre moment was smooth and doesn't feel out of place or forced at all. the simple artstyle fits the transmission of genre where it can get funny to creepy instantly and smoothly.

the story itself kept me hooked with more and more mystery to solve. I can't really go into details to avoid spoilers. What i love ... the most about the story is that it's not generic at all, when i first read it i thought it would be one of those fluffy romantic story between the girl and a ghost boyfriend, but nope lol it turns dark and creepy, and when i thought it would be one of those spirit story setting, it's not. the way the story goes is not easily predicted at all.

the art itself could use improvement, but overall it actually fits the story setting. it's simple yet creepy. very nice.

the characters are amazing, i love the characters development so far. it's balanced, every character have their own development and affect the story in their own way.

overall i really enjoy it, this is very underrated so i guess that's why the translation is quite slow? btw i can't find anymore english translated chapters after chapter 15 so i had to buy the manga on play store.

man... how long have i wished for a good horror romcom?

i know there's plenty out there but they always seem to get the balance off one way or another. "i want to hold aono-kun so badly i could die", however, is an impeccably well-done blend of seinen and shoujo ideals. the way that umi shiina has crafted this narrative that could so easily have wound up cheesy or disgusting in a lesser author's hands is just... outstanding. i seriously wanna kiss her brain for coming up with something that lines up so well with my tastes. there's not a single thing in this manga i ... would change (so far, at least, but i have faith that she'll tie things up in a satisfying way.) it's absolutely flawless, in my opinion. even the title is perfect.

i don't usually fall so head-over-heels in obsessive love with something (lie) but this manga really sucked me in so quickly and violently... i literally made a playlist for aono and yuri right after i caught up on the chapters and i've been working on it for hours. it's one of those loves where you just wanna shout it from the rooftop. i want everyone to know about this thing.

the characters are so wonderfully written. though i have a feeling we don't know everything there is to know about them, yet. i'm genuinely excited to learn more. yuri is an amazing protagonist. she's quirky, relatable, funny, affable, and strong. and aono plays so well with her character; both his light and dark side. the supporting cast are also unique and engaging and interesting. i adore all the relationships here, ESPECIALLY aono and yuri's and it's just crazy to me how more people aren't writing dissertations on them and web-weaving with song lyrics and poem fragments and whatnot... there's genuinely so much material there. it's so twisted and romantic and... ugh. *chef's kiss*

the plot itself gets more complicated as it goes on but umi shiina does such a good job at establishing the rules of the ghosts & the spirit world believably and explaining them all in a way that makes sense and lines up perfectly to the themes she's trying to convey. having mio be the lifeline in the story because she knows so much about the horror genre is so funny to me also LOL she's a wonderful play on the "expert" character in these types of stories bc she's literally just a high school girl who likes horror movies. it's neat! i adore her.

OH, there's another thing! the HORROR, oh my god. it's so understated and it works PERFECTLY for this story for it to be less "all in your face" and more of a creeping dread where something is clearly not right here and it just gets more and more horrifying as you begin to understand it, unlike a lot of horror media where you feel less scared as you understand the monster more. finding out the bad intentions behind the actions of our other protagonist that he himself isn't even aware of and what is driving him to become what he's becoming is just... so horrific.

the art style also works perfectly for the type of understated horror that umi shiina is going for. the art looks very simple on the surface, but that makes it all the more horrifying when an incredibly detailed panel shows the true horror of the situation that our characters are in. i also think it works very well because it's more... pulpy and demure and shoujo-esque than the average seinen, so it works perfectly for the more cheesy and funny scenes. it's truly just beautiful tbh.

all-in-all, i dunno if this review is gonna make anyone wanna read this manga but i really really urge you to check it out if it sounds even the least bit interesting to you. it's not just terrifying, but funny and sweet and romantic and erotic and emotional... it is jam-packed with some of the most delightful art and writing i've ever had the pleasure of checking out. this manga really brought me back to the days of elementary school when i used to voraciously read 500 page books in one night because i couldn't put them down. i'm hungry for more. i want it so badly i could die.

This is one of those stories that capture you completely. It starts like a simple story, and then the climax grows and grows. I read 25 chapters in two days -- I could not stop. The only bad thing about it is that it's ongoing, and now that I read all the available chapters I feel like I'm in withdrawal. Amazing story, living characters. The mangaka is creating a masterwork. My hope is that she will treat her characters well to the very end.

Another aspect that I find amazing is that the elements of the story match perfectly with what I have been reading in ... "serious" books about Japan's history and philosophy. In particular, the concept of the "impure" that is used in the manga is historically faithful; personally I find this great, as it makes it even easier for the reader to "surrender themselves to the story" and embrace a voluntary suspension of disbelief.