| Okay okay, before anyone calls me stupid give me chance. I've been watching anime for over 5 years now, It was my go-to hobby whenever I felt stressed or sad. Maybe it's a combination of having seen too much ideal romances and characters that my expectations for an ideal partner have been affected. Had a hard time at the start of my first relationship since I always expected my partner to reciprocate the way I see them in Anime (always sweet, loving, caring etc.) Of course, after some time I realized its not supposed to be that way though I am curious if I'm the only one. tl;dr - anime affected the way i set expectations for a partner in the past |
| Yes it can change for certain people if they don't know how relationship works. (I see a lot of my friends who also like anime do this.) |
  |
| If you project your tastes in fictional characters onto real people (please don't do that btw) then absolutely. |
Take care of yourself |
| It's not just anime but literature as well. Platonic romances are portrayed in stories which can rarely be practical. It is part of reason why hardcore anime fans or literature readers have high expectations for a partner. |
 "All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost." |
| Society already did that for you Everything changes you Everything you consume, every piece of Information Anime,Literature,People,Society,Movies, Games, Your workplace, Your entire Environment it just depends on what standards you make your choice |
| Well for me falling in love is natural occurrence and extreme rarity. Has happened once in lifetime. But sadly was one-sided. And for relationship to even start, such emotion has to be mutual. Then it will simply naturally work. As for natural way for falling in love will love every aspect of that person even of shortcomings. Meaning if some elements you don't llike and would like to change about person. You could discuss, but wouldn't force. So my moral/love compass is essentially vanilla love. I'm not interested in casual relationships and only be interested once I fall again for someone naturally and confess. Or get get confessed and it is mutual. Then start learning about each other... for few years. Basically spend time together. And only after that once both sides are absolutely certain of their feelings, then begin more intimate relationships. (meaning that's the point where sexlife wlll be born) ...etc At least that is how I view love/romance/sex and I'm absolutely not interested in anything casual or trying someone like trying a new TV. Such things are fairly common which I despise on various levels. Perfect would be if partner would be virgin as well or at least has similar view thus only happened to lose it because of being in serious long time relationship that for whatever reason broke. Such view is fairly painful and lonely... but if ever partner will be achieved. It will be truly joyful... but Anime delivers it very often. And that's why I love romance/love/sex portrayed in "vanilla romance Anime" ... Whilst lot of western media promotes party sex, one night stands, casual low term relationships, lust confusion with love etc..... I rarely see any "Vanilla" romance in western media.... I actually can't think of any. At least that's are my views in a nutshell. If life will give any luck on that.. hopefully will encounter someone with similar views. But I refuse to change it. Edit: So Anime can change some preferences and moral viewpoints. But expectations remain as they were. I do know that Anime or most fiction is idealized or extremed on sides. But concept remains. Whilst in Anime you can get your "perfect waifu" or in fiction in general because you can shape someone according your mind/wishes, In reality I know that people have shortcomings and issues are natural. But moral principles and views can be persistent if person lives by it's own set of rules and seeks for someone who matches those rules. If natural way of falling in love is mutual and lot of things match with each other views. Then that type of relationships have high probability of lasting lifetime. |
DesolatePsycheApr 9, 2019 9:08 AM
 |
| Yeah I was a bit disappointed when there wasn't any big tiddie onee-san to make me a man. In all seriousness though, yes watching anime can change your expectation. The same goes with watching cheesy romance movies and romance novels. We're influenced by everything around us. |
 |
| yes. my partner needs to know anime will always come first please dont take this seriously |
 |
DesolatePsyche said: Well for me falling in love is natural occurrence and extreme rarity. Has happened once in lifetime. But sadly was one-sided. And for relationship to even start, such emotion has to be mutual. Then it will simply naturally work. As for natural way for falling in love will love every aspect of that person even of shortcomings. Meaning if some elements you don't llike and would like to change about person. You could discuss, but wouldn't force. So my moral/love compass is essentially vanilla love. I'm not interested in casual relationships and only be interested once I fall again for someone naturally and confess. Or get get confessed and it is mutual. Then start learning about each other... for few years. Basically spend time together. And only after that once both sides are absolutely certain of their feelings, then begin more intimate relationships. (meaning that's the point where sexlife wlll be born) ...etc At least that is how I view love/romance/sex and I'm absolutely not interested in anything casual or trying someone like trying a new TV. Such things are fairly common which I despise on various levels. Perfect would be if partner would be virgin as well or at least has similar view thus only happened to lose it because of being in serious long time relationship that for whatever reason broke. Such view is fairly painful and lonely... but if ever partner will be achieved. It will be truly joyful... but Anime delivers it very often. And that's why I love romance/love/sex portrayed in "vanilla romance Anime" ... Whilst lot of western media promotes party sex, one night stands, casual low term relationships, lust confusion with love etc..... I rarely see any "Vanilla" romance in western media.... I actually can't think of any. At least that's are my views in a nutshell. If life will give any luck on that.. hopefully will encounter someone with similar views. But I refuse to change it. well said , i can't agree more Vanilla romance in anime is exactly how romance should be in real life |
 |
| I go into anime, expecting from myself that I can learn something from it and enjoy it while I can also keep it separate from my private life. I think that's going alright to be honest. |
  【🇳🇪🇼 🇵🇷🇴🇫🇮🇱🇪 🇩🇪🇸🇮🇬🇳】 I accept all friend requests! - Feel free to add me! |
tragedydesu said: DesolatePsyche said: Well for me falling in love is natural occurrence and extreme rarity. Has happened once in lifetime. But sadly was one-sided. And for relationship to even start, such emotion has to be mutual. Then it will simply naturally work. As for natural way for falling in love will love every aspect of that person even of shortcomings. Meaning if some elements you don't llike and would like to change about person. You could discuss, but wouldn't force. So my moral/love compass is essentially vanilla love. I'm not interested in casual relationships and only be interested once I fall again for someone naturally and confess. Or get get confessed and it is mutual. Then start learning about each other... for few years. Basically spend time together. And only after that once both sides are absolutely certain of their feelings, then begin more intimate relationships. (meaning that's the point where sexlife wlll be born) ...etc At least that is how I view love/romance/sex and I'm absolutely not interested in anything casual or trying someone like trying a new TV. Such things are fairly common which I despise on various levels. Perfect would be if partner would be virgin as well or at least has similar view thus only happened to lose it because of being in serious long time relationship that for whatever reason broke. Such view is fairly painful and lonely... but if ever partner will be achieved. It will be truly joyful... but Anime delivers it very often. And that's why I love romance/love/sex portrayed in "vanilla romance Anime" ... Whilst lot of western media promotes party sex, one night stands, casual low term relationships, lust confusion with love etc..... I rarely see any "Vanilla" romance in western media.... I actually can't think of any. At least that's are my views in a nutshell. If life will give any luck on that.. hopefully will encounter someone with similar views. But I refuse to change it. well said , i can't agree more Vanilla romance in anime is exactly how romance should be in real life I can't help but notice that some anime are too idealistic when it comes to the romances they portray. I'm guessing that's what made it so hard for me to come to terms with my standards. I expected every person to be on par with the anime "waifus" I've come accustomed with. |
| Well, I'm only attracted to people with bangs/a fringe, so Anime certainly has given me expectations to a slight degree. |
 |
| Hmm .. Not just anime but normal shows and movies also can change your expectations of a partner in this case.. It didnt changed my most people are selfish etc. I know real life sucks and I know it will suck its why I watch anime:P |
| No it does not. Only Anime that affect me, affect me because their plots are brilliant. |
GiHielgi said: We have to differentiate 3d and 2d. I know that my partner won't be like Hanekawa, when you assume that you just have to find someone that loves you or understand you. Platonic romance it's just that we can dream about our desired partner but in reality we may find someone similar or even better to what we desired. Yes I thought of it that way initially but the strange thing for me is once that you're in "there" you subconsciously compare your partner to that of an ideal anime waifu. |
LightningSoul said: Okay okay, before anyone calls me stupid give me chance. I've been watching anime for over 5 years now, It was my go-to hobby whenever I felt stressed or sad. Maybe it's a combination of having seen too much ideal romances and characters that my expectations for an ideal partner have been affected. Had a hard time at the start of my first relationship since I always expected my partner to reciprocate the way I see them in Anime (always sweet, loving, caring etc.) Of course, after some time I realized its not supposed to be that way though I am curious if I'm the only one. tl;dr - anime affected the way i set expectations for a partner in the past Well this was true to a certain extent before I started watching anime, but I do really want a sweet, loving, cute girl to be my girlfriend and I can't imagine myself ever being with a girl who isn't like that. I don't think that "dream" is particularly unrealistic though. Its not like sweet, loving, cute girls don't exist. There's quite a few of them in-fact. It might mean you have to look a bit harder to find her if you really care about finding a girl like that but the same could probably be said for anybody's "type." |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
DesolatePsyche said: Well for me falling in love is natural occurrence and extreme rarity. Has happened once in lifetime. But sadly was one-sided. And for relationship to even start, such emotion has to be mutual. Then it will simply naturally work. As for natural way for falling in love will love every aspect of that person even of shortcomings. Meaning if some elements you don't llike and would like to change about person. You could discuss, but wouldn't force. So my moral/love compass is essentially vanilla love. I'm not interested in casual relationships and only be interested once I fall again for someone naturally and confess. Or get get confessed and it is mutual. Then start learning about each other... for few years. Basically spend time together. And only after that once both sides are absolutely certain of their feelings, then begin more intimate relationships. (meaning that's the point where sexlife wlll be born) ...etc At least that is how I view love/romance/sex and I'm absolutely not interested in anything casual or trying someone like trying a new TV. Such things are fairly common which I despise on various levels. Perfect would be if partner would be virgin as well or at least has similar view thus only happened to lose it because of being in serious long time relationship that for whatever reason broke. Such view is fairly painful and lonely... but if ever partner will be achieved. It will be truly joyful... but Anime delivers it very often. And that's why I love romance/love/sex portrayed in "vanilla romance Anime" ... Whilst lot of western media promotes party sex, one night stands, casual low term relationships, lust confusion with love etc..... I rarely see any "Vanilla" romance in western media.... I actually can't think of any. At least that's are my views in a nutshell. If life will give any luck on that.. hopefully will encounter someone with similar views. But I refuse to change it. Edit: So Anime can change some preferences and moral viewpoints. But expectations remain as they were. I do know that Anime or most fiction is idealized or extremed on sides. But concept remains. Whilst in Anime you can get your "perfect waifu" or in fiction in general because you can shape someone according your mind/wishes, In reality I know that people have shortcomings and issues are natural. But moral principles and views can be persistent if person lives by it's own set of rules and seeks for someone who matches those rules. If natural way of falling in love is mutual and lot of things match with each other views. Then that type of relationships have high probability of lasting lifetime. Yeah I get that. The sort of sweet innocence of romance animes is a big selling point to me too. I think we've come to glorify one night stands and "unemotional sex" too much here in the US. Its been glorified so much that I've heard a lot of people act as if "you're wasting your college years" if you don't spend them pursuing casual sex. But casual sex is really overrated tbh. Sex will always feel better and more fulfilling when you have an emotional attachment and affection for the person you're with. |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
| Yeah, I think its a waste of time, because that doesn't exist in real life. |
 |
Mila91 said: Yeah, I think its a waste of time, because that doesn't exist in real life. Are you saying that sweet loving girls don't exist in real life? Why do you say that? |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
| No, only you can change the expectations you have for a partner. You can choose to do it based on how anime idealizes girls, but that's probably not the best decision. The point is in the end it's up to you and not the amount of anime you watch. You can watch one show and decide to adjust your expectations based on that or you can watch a million and still be able to differentiate between reality and idealization. |
| I probably regret this post by now. |
| Won't happen, sure an ideal romance like portrayed in fiction would awesome - the lack of dirty sex, but I've had enough exposure to rl "romance" to know it better. |
One Piece episode 914 & 915 & 1027 were a mistake and 957 brought the salvation - FMmatron |
Mila91 said: @Ryuk9428 well I meant to say, that perfect guys like the ones in the anime,don't exist in real life. Actually I have met guys who act a lot like the guys in anime do. They tend to not really draw much attention to themselves though so its harder to meet organically whereas anime always comes up with a way for characters to meet. |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
| I think about this a lot too! The awesome joy one can experience in an anime (or any story telling medium) when a romance comes through is so uplifting, I wish romance would be like that for everyone... And so many of the romances in anime are "reasonable" to the degree that they are just characters resonating with each other... But I think you could think about it in this way : Romances in a story may be exaggerated, but they are painting a picture for a moment in time. This differs from the real world application of being a relationship with some one, because our lives don't fit into a convenient 12 episode format. Reality has many factors that keep us changing and on our toes 24 hours a day! So it is a little silly to try to emulate a romance over something you've seen in a show, but a romance that brings a tear to your ear is a healthy and exciting reminder that humans have the capability of feeling that overwhelming joy in the small, unique moments of our every day lives. I think it could change your expectations, but if you look at it in the way that these shows are just "moments" of an existence, it could help foster a healthy attitude to romance as a whole :) |
| I don't doubt that there are people who have raised expectations of reality after watching anime especially on the relationship side but those works are the ideal which is probably why people watch them in the first place. You can try work towards that ideal situation but I don't believe one should unhealthily start mixing reality with situations in anime or you'll get burned. |
 Latest reviews: Wonder Egg Priority and A Couple of Cukoos |
| This is funny because one of my good buddies had this girl that he had been making moves on for over 2 years. one day, he got interested in the anime I was watching, which was Toradora (highly recommend by the way.) So I put him on season 1 of Seven Deadly Sins, and he was hooked. But, after a week or so, I could tell that something had changed. Turns out that he liked Diane so much that he had lost all interest in his real-life crush. So, In my experience yes, anime can change the expectations you have for a partner. |
 |
noah9999 said: I think about this a lot too! The awesome joy one can experience in an anime (or any story telling medium) when a romance comes through is so uplifting, I wish romance would be like that for everyone... And so many of the romances in anime are "reasonable" to the degree that they are just characters resonating with each other... But I think you could think about it in this way : Romances in a story may be exaggerated, but they are painting a picture for a moment in time. This differs from the real world application of being a relationship with some one, because our lives don't fit into a convenient 12 episode format. Reality has many factors that keep us changing and on our toes 24 hours a day! So it is a little silly to try to emulate a romance over something you've seen in a show, but a romance that brings a tear to your ear is a healthy and exciting reminder that humans have the capability of feeling that overwhelming joy in the small, unique moments of our every day lives. I think it could change your expectations, but if you look at it in the way that these shows are just "moments" of an existence, it could help foster a healthy attitude to romance as a whole :) Very well said! :D , didn't think of it this way. |
| I believe you've answered your own question. Yes; if you attempt to apply traits found in fictional characters onto real-life people, it will likely end with unsavory results. |
| Fucking weeebss.. Why do you watch romance anime in the first place.. |
| “You should enjoy the little detours to the fullest. Because that's where you'll find the things more important than what you want.” |
| I mean all media you consume shapes you, and your behavior, so yes. |
| if ur can't distinguish reality from fiction, then you have bigger issues. that applies to all media in general, not just anime. e.g. romance novels, television shows, movies. Those kind of stories are very unrealistic so they're a bad baseline to judge irl relationships with. -moving to another country to be with someone -sacrificing career for someone -long distance relationships -expecting partner to change significantly for you -expecting the feeling of infatuation to last all pipedreams most cases. |
SlawadiaApr 10, 2019 3:06 AM
LightningSoul said: Okay okay, before anyone calls me stupid give me chance. I've been watching anime for over 5 years now, It was my go-to hobby whenever I felt stressed or sad. Maybe it's a combination of having seen too much ideal romances and characters that my expectations for an ideal partner have been affected. Had a hard time at the start of my first relationship since I always expected my partner to reciprocate the way I see them in Anime (always sweet, loving, caring etc.) Of course, after some time I realized its not supposed to be that way though I am curious if I'm the only one. tl;dr - anime affected the way i set expectations for a partner in the past Listen. This is the answer. The world you have around you is chosen by you. The medium through which information reaches you is irrelevant. The woman in your life is a representation of what you want the woman in your life to be. |
| Closer. |
| Nope... i'm ain't gonna gay by watching anime over a decade |
 |
AnimePixelz said: i think it does rise some extent tbh but you just gotta realise that 2d and irl are separate. e.g usui takumi. perfect bf material tbh. though i do suppose there are anime character traits you can find irl n stuff. but overall, i watched a lot of anime in 2015 and i'll say it didnt really much change anything, just wish there more people that have these specific anime character traits ig idek Yeah but overtime you subconsciously try to find these traits in a partner after having been exposed to them for so long. Idk but I feel like during those days, my mind was kind of conditioned by anime that an ideal waifu should be like this or that. |
| yes. And it can change your outlook on life too. The unrealistic expectations anime sets for the real world are extremely dissapointing, and often lead to a habit of watching more anime to cope. |
 |
| To be honest with, I kind of agree and understand by what you mean. I started watching anime end of 2017 or beginning of 2018 and it started off very casually but I got really invested into it. Even though it hasn't been years, Ive watched a good amount of anime and my perspective on an ideal partner has comparatively changed. Ofcourse, other factors play a role in my romantic preferences but I know that anime has influenced some decisions of mine or my thought process on this as well. It isnt anything major that affected me drastically but ofcourse stuff people watch influences their emotions and thought process since even anime is visual data which you're absorbing and learning from. |
| Yes. I won't even give a girl a second look unless she has the external characteristics of a 12 year old, but is in fact a 500+ year old demon. |
| Yes, watching anime certainly has made me crave for vanilla love and doki-doki romance some times. I mean who doesn't wants a cute, understanding waifu? But reality tend to kicks in faster. You won't always get the perfect partner in real but accepting each other's shortcomings and supporting your partner is an important part for any relationship. |
 |
More topics from this board
» Do you drop shows? ( 1 2 )EverRealm - Yesterday |
55 |
by Rinenka
»»
8 minutes ago |
|
» Do you fantasize about anime while you sleep?Alpha_1_Zero - 4 hours ago |
14 |
by Rinenka
»»
12 minutes ago |
|
» Why are most current goblins green?Absurdo_N - 49 minutes ago |
9 |
by Kenzolo-folk
»»
12 minutes ago |
|
Poll: » How do you watch anime?RobertBobert - 3 hours ago |
21 |
by Rinenka
»»
17 minutes ago |
|
» Has the isekai bubble finally burst ( 1 2 )EastIndiaCompany - Yesterday |
56 |
by Ionliosite2
»»
31 minutes ago |