| Hey I'm Sjaak (Jack) 16 y/o and i have been depressed for a year now i went to a psychologist a couple of times now, stayed home from school a long time and tried everything i could think of except for asking some strangers on MAL. Could someone pls help me? |
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| Did you ever get any medications prescribed? If it's long-term like this, that'll definitely be a good option. Also, speaking with a therapist at least once a month can be helpful as well. Even if you feel like doing nothing, or like isolating yourself, that's really the last thing you'll want to do. Exercise has been shown to improve mood, and meeting new people can have beneficial effects as well. Don't just sit around; make sure you become active. When it gets really hard, don't let yourself sink into it, and don't feed it; do something mindless but cheerful, like watching SoL comedies or something, and just leave your head and go to a happy place for a while. That'd be my advice, but of course you'll want to experiment and see what works best for you. Generally, the primary things depressed people are advised to steer clear of are: isolation, sad/depressing things (TV shows, anime, manga, books, songs, etc.), and toxic interpersonal relationships. If you feel like people at your school are adding fuel to the fire, so to speak, just avoid them as much as you can. It's generally not a good idea to skip school entirely, though, but you know your own situation best, so make sure you take it all into consideration. |
 "Shocking truth!" ~Chaika Trabant"How unpleasant." ~Kuriyama Mirai "Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there." ~Rem "You don't die for your friends; you live for them." ~Misaka Mikoto "Now I believe. In my own strength... and in the one who gave me that strength." ~Roze "I'll be the guard dog of all your fever dreams." Signature and forum avatar courtesy of @SenpieX |
| thx a lot for the advice though isolating myself and having a hard time talking to people I still go to the gym 3 times a week. Going to a nice place would be hard since i don't know any |
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| you man up and deal with the problems that are making you depressed like a man unless you're clinically depressed, which you probably aren't , then you go see a doctor |
☕ Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. ☕ |
| Do you have a mentor? Someone like a spiritual father/confessor or older brother, godfather or anything? They do not have to have all the answers for you, but just talking about it and sounding ideas from them is very good. And sometimes a lot of people dismiss the thought of talking and being mentored by older people thinking they do not understand, when in reality they understand more than you will know. Good to see you are at the gym. Also try to stay off too much food and drink that is not natural, a little here and there is ok, but not too much. |
| idk about you but the closer a girl gets to looking like ronald mcdonald, the more aroused i become. CAV where can we cast our eyes to @PoruMairu who thinks of himself a member of the true church. Helion. |
| I would suggest not staying cooped up in the house, it will make you feel worse. I have some experience with this, I was home schooled for a little while and also felt depressed. Once I got out the house it made me feel a little better. |
Sjaaklap said: Going to a nice place would be hard since i don't know any I meant watch cheerful anime and let your mind go to a happy place. But if you did know a happy place to literally go to, that'd be even better, I suppose. :P |
| "Shocking truth!" ~Chaika Trabant "How unpleasant." ~Kuriyama Mirai "Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there." ~Rem "You don't die for your friends; you live for them." ~Misaka Mikoto "Now I believe. In my own strength... and in the one who gave me that strength." ~Roze "I'll be the guard dog of all your fever dreams." Signature and forum avatar courtesy of @SenpieX |
| ahh i see well thx again i really appreciatie your help |
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| Dont know man but yes good advice up top try to get out more staying inside the house usually makes it worse unless your having a lot of fun I also have depression I don't want to say "suffer" since people in the world go through so much stuff but yes it does suck just try and be happy |
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| yeah, i should go out more even though that sounds easier said then done. but yes I've been to a doctor and am already getting professional help. |
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| I was in a similar position when i was 17, my advices stay away from everything that is causing you to feel depressed, find a hobby something you can dedicate 100% of your time and make you feel great (for me it was piano) and last create a strong personality (like korrvo said above man-up). Don't cry for woman (or men), friends or even family and if you feel bad when someone criticize you or say shit about you what you need is to create thicker skin. Nowadays nothing puts me down, not rejection, people locking at me or saying shit about me. If it's something stronger or some trauma them look for a medic. |
 Ex-pianist, Electrical engineer student, wannabe programmer. |
| well you are already getting help from a professional so thats good i will just add that there will soon be a more effective medicine without much side effect thats gonna be available for depression, google GLYX-13 and you find news like this https://www.nimh.nih.gov/news/science-news/2013/ketamine-cousin-rapidly-lifts-depression-without-side-effects.shtml wikipedia even stated that its going on a fast track designation by FDA there https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rapastinel |
| exercise + lots of fruit+ meditation = you won't be that depressed any more. If you aren't doing all of this already then you're not even trying. You gotta bust ass mate... nobody can take your burden away from you. I know you don't want to hear this but just remember, depression is all in your head... |
| I CELEBRATE myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you. |
| Everybod thx for all the advice ill sure will look into some of you guys recommendations and making the best out of it |
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| Do you know why you are feeling depressed? |
| Yes it's because I've been through parental abuse witch gave me the social anxiety I'm dealing with because of that I have no rl friends anymore and have a real hard time talking to anyone |
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| Sry if im asking too deeply but im wondering your social anxiety does it cause panic attack or ticks? You still in high school many chances to make a friend if tried. |
| Yes it does thats why i haven't been going to school now for a while |
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| For making friends I'm trying as hard is I can and will keep doing that even though it hasn't been succesfull yet |
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| I see would feel not yourself for sure doing things you wouldnt normally done before and unable to stop it. Is it like really bad or you think it somewhat manageable? |
| Panic attacks are indeed hindering my life especially when I'm out in public due to being afraid of getting one, For ticks I dont really have one thats really bothering me the only real noticable one is that I'm yawning alot when talking to people i don't know why i do that it just happens |
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| Well not to diminish anything but atleast its not like verbal a best in a worst case maybe(i suck at wording). Hmm seems like a pick your poison kinda thing but its better to face it now and not let this carry on any longer and feel like wasted any years etc. |
PrayMeyerNov 16, 2016 2:41 AM
| Yeah I try thats why I will attend school again starting next week |
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| But how do we know that you're actually depressed? You could just be some kid being an attention whore. If you are, please stop, we don't need you here. But if you need help, go to a physiatrist. Or if you really need help, call a Suciude Prevention Line. |
| Be a pussy, get the pussy |
| As I said I'm getting proffesional help. But if you think I'm not being real why bother reacting (even though i see where you're coming from) In the end I asked for help and got some great advice so I'm happy for today and will try out the things that were recommended to me. |
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I don't know if you have it or not, and I don't much care. I'm not going to incriminate you for asking this like oddly several people have(bitching to someone about you thinking they're not depressed is a ticket to fulfilling prophecy town). I've major depressive disorder so I've been plagued with depression my entire life. Your question was simply "what to do about depression", and I'll answer to the best I can, I hope it helps you with whatever you may be going through, sjaak, and don't listen to people saying what you are and are not here. They know nothing about you. Their opinions are nothing but skeptical conjecture. Anyway, Here's what I've learned about it:
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  There's a lady who's sure All that glitters is gold And she's buying a stairway to heaven When she gets there she knows If the stores are all closed With a word she can get what she came for Oh oh oh oh and she's buying a stairway to heaven |
| do sunbathe ur worries & anxiety fade !! |
Whoremoans said: I don't know if you have it or not, and I don't much care. I'm not going to incriminate you for asking this like oddly several people have(bitching to someone about you thinking they're not depressed is a ticket to fulfilling prophecy town). I've major depressive disorder so I've been plagued with depression my entire life. Your question was simply "what to do about depression", and I'll answer to the best I can, I hope it helps you with whatever you may be going through, sjaak, and don't listen to people saying what you are and are not here. They know nothing about you. Their opinions are nothing but skeptical conjecture. Anyway, Here's what I've learned about it:
Thx for being honest and real with me tbh i was thinking things like getting friends would solve everything but I'm glad you told me thats not the thing so I wont be dissapointed. Still keep trying to make some friends as you said they can still behelpfull and its just a nice thing having some people you can hangout with and talk to at school. I am seeing a psychlogist already so its good to hear that was a good decision Cant thank you enough for being open and real with me |
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Salvatia said: do sunbathe ur worries & anxiety fade !! I love doing that Its realy relaxing. But since Its autumn now and winter is coming there wont be much that for a while still thx for giving the advice |
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Sjaaklap said: Whoremoans said: I don't know if you have it or not, and I don't much care. I'm not going to incriminate you for asking this like oddly several people have(bitching to someone about you thinking they're not depressed is a ticket to fulfilling prophecy town). I've major depressive disorder so I've been plagued with depression my entire life. Your question was simply "what to do about depression", and I'll answer to the best I can, I hope it helps you with whatever you may be going through, sjaak, and don't listen to people saying what you are and are not here. They know nothing about you. Their opinions are nothing but skeptical conjecture. Anyway, Here's what I've learned about it:
Thx for being honest and real with me tbh i was thinking things like getting friends would solve everything but I'm glad you told me thats not the thing so I wont be dissapointed. Still keep trying to make some friends as you said they can still behelpfull and its just a nice thing having some people you can hangout with and talk to at school. I am seeing a psychlogist already so its good to hear that was a good decision Cant thank you enough for being open and real with me Good, making friends can be an amazing experience., never give up trying to make more. We'd be living in a much nicer world if only we sought friends as readily as enemies. Good to hear you are seeing one, seeing a psych about it is a significant milestone, you have my congratulations. And I'm sorry to hear that your life has been so unfair that you need to thank someone just for being honest with you. |
There's a lady who's sure All that glitters is gold And she's buying a stairway to heaven When she gets there she knows If the stores are all closed With a word she can get what she came for Oh oh oh oh and she's buying a stairway to heaven |
| Take drugs for depression or smoke weed. |
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DEVlL said: Take drugs for depression or smoke weed. the problem is (and I don't know if you were serious about this) That medication or drugs only works when you're on it so its not gonna improve anything or get you somewhere. |
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Sjaaklap said: Yes it's because I've been through parental abuse witch gave me the social anxiety I'm dealing with because of that I have no rl friends anymore and have a real hard time talking to anyone Are your parents still abusing you? If they do, maybe you should move out. When I was your age I was also depressed because of my abusive mother. And now that I haven't seen her for 6 years already I really feel better and I laugh everyday. Did you ever think about moving out at a close relative? Also, don't do drugs and I'm serious about it. You may think it makes you feel better on the go, but it is merely all an illusion. |
| a cure for depression? the best option is always to kill yourself. |
Sjaaklap said: That medication or drugs only works when you're on it so its not gonna improve anything or get you somewhere. I wouldn't recommend self-medicating, since most of what people take are actually depressors. However, it's not necessarily true that prescribed medication won't get you anywhere. My older brother took antidepressants until he met his current girlfriend, got therapy, and changed his habits. Right now he's off the medications and is doing great, but prior to taking them he was suicidal. It can help, and it's not always going to be permanent. That said, I am also taking antidepressants, and I don't have a problem with staying on them indefinitely—the way I see it, it's a habit like any other. Just as regular exercise can help, so can regularly taking medication. If you're worried about not having access to it consistently, then I could see where you would be worried, but most antidepressants won't leave you more depressed than before once you stop taking them; you'll just be back to the way you were before, or better depending on other influences in your life. I dislike that so many people make it out to be some sort of evil or negative thing. If you need help, get it by any reasonable means necessary. Just my two cents'. |
| "Shocking truth!" ~Chaika Trabant "How unpleasant." ~Kuriyama Mirai "Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there." ~Rem "You don't die for your friends; you live for them." ~Misaka Mikoto "Now I believe. In my own strength... and in the one who gave me that strength." ~Roze "I'll be the guard dog of all your fever dreams." Signature and forum avatar courtesy of @SenpieX |
Hrybami said: Sjaaklap said: Yes it's because I've been through parental abuse witch gave me the social anxiety I'm dealing with because of that I have no rl friends anymore and have a real hard time talking to anyone Are your parents still abusing you? If they do, maybe you should move out. When I was your age I was also depressed because of my abusive mother. And now that I haven't seen her for 6 years already I really feel better and I laugh everyday. Did you ever think about moving out at a close relative? Also, don't do drugs and I'm serious about it. You may think it makes you feel better on the go, but it is merely all an illusion. I have thought about it but never considered it an option though it isnt as bad as it used to be since if grown older bigger and stronger but I always have thought about it as something that might help and as I said I'm not gonna take medication or use drugs |
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VagueClarity said: Sjaaklap said: That medication or drugs only works when you're on it so its not gonna improve anything or get you somewhere. I wouldn't recommend self-medicating, since most of what people take are actually depressors. However, it's not necessarily true that prescribed medication won't get you anywhere. My older brother took antidepressants until he met his current girlfriend, got therapy, and changed his habits. Right now he's off the medications and is doing great, but prior to taking them he was suicidal. It can help, and it's not always going to be permanent. That said, I am also taking antidepressants, and I don't have a problem with staying on them indefinitely—the way I see it, it's a habit like any other. Just as regular exercise can help, so can regularly taking medication. If you're worried about not having access to it consistently, then I could see where you would be worried, but most antidepressants won't leave you more depressed than before once you stop taking them; you'll just be back to the way you were before, or better depending on other influences in your life. I dislike that so many people make it out to be some sort of evil or negative thing. If you need help, get it by any reasonable means necessary. Just my two cents'. Oké thx for the info I didn't know all that as you put it Can't make things worse and could be benefitial. since I hadn't thought about it that way I assumed it wouldn't really do something for me. since I believe what you're saying I might be willing to try it then. So considering my current situation would you recommend prescribed medication. (I do understand if you're not willing to do that) |
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CookieGawd said: Good to see that you're seeing a professional, but make sure to put in all you got. The gym is great too, i see it as a way to clear the mind and it also builds some confidence as well. Some things I will suggest: -Meditation: Do it a half an hour each day. Close your eyes and keep a breathing pattern going. It really does help ease the mind. -Surround yourself with some friends or loved ones. I see that it's tough for you that you went through parental abuse and i hope nothing of that sort is going on anymore. You're 16 so you should probably be in high school which is probably the easiest place to find a group of lads to befriend. Try doing a school sport/join a club which suit your interest and just try talking an crack some jokes with the people there. -Do not use drugs as a way to cope. I do love smoking weed with friends once in a while for fun and it helps get my mind off a lot of things. But if you use it as a way to cope you will find yourself becoming dependent on them making your problems worse. -Become more dependent on yourself and introspect; probably the biggest thing. Friends and professionals are nice and all but if you are not doing any work with yourself you're not going to get anywhere. Also do some self examining and think about things like who you are as a person, what do you want from this life, etc. I do warn you though that too much introspection may be harmful as you will find yourself drowning inside yourself and become detached from the outside world. Thx for the advise Ill sure look into it |
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SnugglyWhuggly said: I feel like I'm probably just going to be parroting what I've already said in a similar thread a month or two ago, but: Depression is always going to be one of those tricky topics, because depression is different for everyone; everyone will experience it differently, and everyone will have different methods for coping. So, my advice would be to experiment. If you find doing physical exercise helps to distract yourself from depressive thoughts, do that. If you find doing more mental activities helps, do that. If you're feeling too depressed to do much of anything, do it anyway. I know it's tough to motivate yourself when you're really down in the dumps, but the only person who can really help you, is you. Other people can offer support and advice, but it's ultimately up to you to pull yourself up and actively try to do something to combat your depression. You're right about that and thx for notifying me of it again cuz in the end I need to be the one figuring things out |
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Sjaaklap said: VagueClarity said: I wouldn't recommend self-medicating, since most of what people take are actually depressors. However, it's not necessarily true that prescribed medication won't get you anywhere. My older brother took antidepressants until he met his current girlfriend, got therapy, and changed his habits. Right now he's off the medications and is doing great, but prior to taking them he was suicidal. It can help, and it's not always going to be permanent. That said, I am also taking antidepressants, and I don't have a problem with staying on them indefinitely—the way I see it, it's a habit like any other. Just as regular exercise can help, so can regularly taking medication. If you're worried about not having access to it consistently, then I could see where you would be worried, but most antidepressants won't leave you more depressed than before once you stop taking them; you'll just be back to the way you were before, or better depending on other influences in your life. I dislike that so many people make it out to be some sort of evil or negative thing. If you need help, get it by any reasonable means necessary. Just my two cents'. Oké thx for the info I didn't know all that as you put it Can't make things worse and could be benefitial. since I hadn't thought about it that way I assumed it wouldn't really do something for me. since I believe what you're saying I might be willing to try it then. So considering my current situation would you recommend prescribed medication. (I do understand if you're not willing to do that) You should note that antidepressants do have a chance of making things worse. You might start having suicidal thoughts, or become more depressed than before. If you notice that, make sure to tell your psychiatrist immediately so you can get a new one prescribed. There are genetic tests, at least in my country, which can tell with like a 95% accuracy which medications would work best, and what dose. Look into that; it only takes about a week to get the results, and it's better than guessing. Just talk to your psychiatrist and see what they can do. It can be good to also know if someone in your family is taking antidepressants, and what kind and dose, to compare. |
| "Shocking truth!" ~Chaika Trabant "How unpleasant." ~Kuriyama Mirai "Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there." ~Rem "You don't die for your friends; you live for them." ~Misaka Mikoto "Now I believe. In my own strength... and in the one who gave me that strength." ~Roze "I'll be the guard dog of all your fever dreams." Signature and forum avatar courtesy of @SenpieX |
| Hit the gym, train yourself. Eat healthy, dont think about bad things. Enjoy what you like. Ignore others that try to keep you down. |
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| Sublimination helped me out big time. Into any of the arts (writing, painting, music, etc)? |
There's a lady who's sure All that glitters is gold And she's buying a stairway to heaven When she gets there she knows If the stores are all closed With a word she can get what she came for Oh oh oh oh and she's buying a stairway to heaven |
| Suffering depression for a long period of my life, I found that identifying what makes me depressed is the first way I worked towards a solution. I found that extended periods of time being isolated is what makes me depressed, since I have thoughts about loneliness, suicide, etc. When I discovered that, I just don't give myself the opportunity to become depressed. That's how I am coping with it. I read what you said about anti-depressants, and I found it very interesting as I was contemplating the use of medication. Have you ever tried medication for depression? The only thing that really stopped me was how it can affect your mood fluctuations, contribute to psychiatric disorders, become addictive, or deal with the problem at heart. If you're depressed, there's usually a reason right? So that would make anti-depressants the same as running away from that problem? Just some thoughts. Would love to hear (and learn) from your thoughts. |
| Insert Signature Here. |
| Jogging always makes me feel better. But the best advice I can give, is that after you graduate from High School, things will get better. I felt much like you when I was your age, but after I finished High School, the problems went away, because I didn't have to be around large crowds of people anymore. |
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Sjaaklap said: Hey I'm Sjaak (Jack) 16 y/o and i have been depressed for a year now i went to a psychologist a couple of times now, stayed home from school a long time and tried everything i could think of except for asking some strangers on MAL. Could someone pls help me? As an old guy here let me tell you that this staff many times are just things of the teenage young age. You are more prone to sentimental up and downs and searching for meaning of life and soul searching and all that. When you get older you accept yourself better and learn to get along with yourself and generally feel less depressed etc. So relax you will get over it. Depression btw isn't cool. I am just saying that because teenagers sometimes see it as kind of cool thing and try to force themselves to be all emo for attention etc. People look threw that in a second btw and find it funny, teens ain't fooling anyone with that shit. It will earn no points I'm just telling you in case you have that emo type wish a little in the back of your mind because most teens have it to a certain point. Also if you have some crazy notions based on things other people do or say, delete them from your mind. For example don't feel like you have to do what others may try to do or what they say is cool and all that and make yourself feel miserable if you can't do that etc. Such things are false expectations you put on yourself. You don't have to sleep with a dozen girls or do crazy things in parties for your life to have meaning and all that teenage stuff. Btw, make an exercise program based not on muscles but on fitness. Exercise like that always make people feel more energetic, confident and make your body release hormones that make you feel better and more optimistic and alive. |
MonadMar 9, 2017 3:08 PM
| @DearlyDie I am currently taking antidepressants, yes. I had always sensed a sort of "inner turmoil," so to speak, so it came as no surprise that I was emotionally unstable after taking antidepressants. I believe that that is more an effect of suddenly becoming able to feel emotions more actively than a side effect of the medication itself. I did end up getting prescribed antipsychotics for another reason, but which also act as mood stabilizers, so I can't vouch for a surefire recovery from that instability without further medicating. In my case, it wasn't until after I started taking antidepressants that I realized the reason for my depression. Now that I can see it, I'm actively addressing it, and I suspect I'll be able to go off the antidepressants once I've dealt with the problem. It is true, I believe, that some antidepressants can be addictive. However, seeing as it's not like a narcotic, I see no harm in its continued use if it's helpful. All it's doing is letting you feel the emotions that were deadened, and hopefully ridding some of the suicidal ideations, if any, which had arisen from the depression. In my case, the depression was brought about by two things. The first is loneliness. I can't address this right now, as I don't intend to get into a relationship just yet and don't have any particularly close friends. The second is a fundamental identity issue, and I'm working on changing myself to better match how I feel on the inside. I feel like addressing the second issue will both alleviate the depression without needing further medication, and also help to address the first—I will probably feel more up to socializing once I don't feel like I'm lying to everyone I meet. Please note that this is just my opinion. I am not a medical professional, nor can I, in good conscience, provide any recommendations or directions regarding treatment plans. |
| "Shocking truth!" ~Chaika Trabant "How unpleasant." ~Kuriyama Mirai "Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there." ~Rem "You don't die for your friends; you live for them." ~Misaka Mikoto "Now I believe. In my own strength... and in the one who gave me that strength." ~Roze "I'll be the guard dog of all your fever dreams." Signature and forum avatar courtesy of @SenpieX |
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