| Females like attention, I.e making a thread about how you're oppressed because people are flirting with you People prolly flirt with you because they're sad weebs, me included, why do you care if they're not saying anything bad anyway, just say, sorry not interested |
| facepalm.jpg They give you attention does not qualify as objectifying. You can always have the option of ignore them, it's internet afterall. |
Pirating_Ninja said: So by your own merit, objectification (or something close to it) is when one is treated in a way that cares very little for their own personality. When one takes a picture of a person cosplaying, do they care about the person behind it, or do they care about the cosplay itself? By your own standards she is doing something that is for the sole purpose of being "objectified". That's what the dictionary says. I don't think op is using the term correctly, since hitting on someone doesn't induce objectification, but it fits in case of harassment for example. "treating people like tools or toys, as if they had no feelings, opinions, or rights of their own" http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/objectification About the cosplay thing. It's fine to objectifying yourself, because that is your wish, but doesn't imply you want to be objectified by others. There is nothing wrong with not caring about the cosplayer, as long as you ask politely for a photo, but assuming you are entitled to do it is wrong. On the other side, cosplaying and not accepting that people ask to take photos when it's not clear it's not desired (that's a bit how I understand op's complain), is not really realist. But then, I can understand that being annoyed by horny brats all of the time can be bothering. |
YakkululzMay 10, 2016 6:15 AM
| Girls annoy me so much sometimes ugh. They get offended by the littlest things. -_- |
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| Most people would be males on anime related Internet forums as you can tell from the posters calling you names, and such. It feels uncomfortable for a female to just have strangers flirting with her and only talk to her to flirt but these people here don't understand and will just say "suck it up". How can it not be possible to see it from the op's point of view, it's not difficult. |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
invisiblestorm said: boo hoo, people treat you bad on the internets, cry me a fucking riverSo awhile back I used to blog about anime. It was fun and I had a good time, but then people started doubting my gender or -- even worse -- started flirting with me. I've since pretty much abandoned my blog. So why do people do this? I rarely see boys being hit on in the anime community, but I get hit on constantly. It's quite annoying, to be frank. I just want to have fun and contribute to the community without my being objectified. If you need examples, take this one boy who constantly hits on me. I've also abandoned my twitter because of him and others. He's said things to me like "Are we soulmates?" after I said I was coincidentally listening to the same ED as him. This sounds like a joke and I'd normally treat it as such, but he is always flirting with me. The comment I received from him that bothered me the most is one about me being a "good little sis (he used the term Umaru because I had recently cosplayed UMR) and not leaving the house." He's not the only one who does this. I'm not asking for it, either. If I was I'd be ecstatic boys were doing this. So yeah. Boys, why do you some of you do this? Girls, does this happen to you too? And everyone, why is this treated as normal? |
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TheBrainintheJar said: This is people trying to connect with you, trying to get to know you and being fascinated by you. I guarantee that @invisiblestrorm prematurely rejected at least one genuinely interested boy, causing at least one anonymous topic on a bulletin board about why his attempt to connect with her failed. invisiblestorm said: "Are we soulmates?" Without love, it can't be seen. Neither without a dictionary. Do you believe that objects have souls? |
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| This sounds like something JoeySalad would make into a "Social Experiement" |
| There have been one person that have tried to get to know me even more than 'friends' on MAL. I knew he was hitting on me and I didn't talk much to him now. I mean he was nice and stuff, but I go to MAL to chill out not hook up. I usually add people as friends because we have similar interests and it seems 80% of them are girls. I have quite a few guy friends on MAL. |
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| i was about to comment about somthing.. but seeing the amount of replys this thread has got that has power lvls over 90000 that can rape my english.... nvm dont mind me so lonely... and god damm 'this whole hiiting on people shiiet is so lame >_>'. am still living in a fantasy world about true love nonsense aint i... ........ i have to freaking go hit on girls to find true love.. i wont find it just.. just siting here on a chair. or walking the streets doing nothing .. sigh... thats wat this thread thaught me... ...Bullshit ;-; |
TheDiabolicEsperMay 10, 2016 8:14 AM
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| i always thought that girls like to be in the limelight..... i think its possible to block/igrnote ppl |
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| 10/10 i'm sure you're ugly and miserable in real life... |
Usagi said: That probably has something to do with your boyfriend, lol.I seem to attract foot fetishes. I have gotten many of weird PMs over the years... Spooks said: This, on the offchance that you are serious I think you're just blowing this out of proportion. It's not something you should really care about.I don't think the op is serious with what they're saying. Nice thread, im sure very entertaining. |
Wecc said: All hail HaXXspetten king of the loli traps!  |
Thebigofan said: Most people would be males on anime related Internet forums as you can tell from the posters calling you names, and such. It feels uncomfortable for a female to just have strangers flirting with her and only talk to her to flirt but these people here don't understand and will just say "suck it up". How can it not be possible to see it from the op's point of view, it's not difficult. I've had a girl repeatedly tell me she wanted to rape me. Another girl kept constantly asking me "when are you going to sleep with me?". |
orosan said: oh man, guys hitting on you, what a tragedy. for real though get over it, and im saying this with the nicest way possible, its NOT a bad thing to be flirted on, you should actually consider it a compliment that someones actually is interested in you in a sort of way. being a female myself i have my shares of "hits", but i dismiss it and know what? i survived the next day wooo! infact i met my husband as one of the guys that hit on me, man was he annoying as hell when he did it, but when it came to anime/manga topics im all ears for discussions with him and opened up a bit to being friends instead, time flew by and what ya know we're married. so what i think so far is, just because someone is hitting on you, doesnt make them a bad person. I've had men hit on my even though I told them I have no interest in men. Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people because they don't respect someone else's sexuality. |
traed said: Thebigofan said: Most people would be males on anime related Internet forums as you can tell from the posters calling you names, and such. It feels uncomfortable for a female to just have strangers flirting with her and only talk to her to flirt but these people here don't understand and will just say "suck it up". How can it not be possible to see it from the op's point of view, it's not difficult. I've had a girl repeatedly tell me she wanted to rape me. Another girl kept constantly asking me "when are you going to sleep with me?". I'm not saying that men can't experience harassment online rather women face this more than men. |
| Signature removed. Please follow the signature rules, as defined in the Site & Forum Guidelines. |
Thebigofan said: I'm not saying that men can't experience harassment online rather women face this more than men. Harassment is multiple prolonged unwanted threatening behavior after you tell someone directly to not do it. The OP wasnt really making it clear it was harassment and made it sound more like just different people flirting or hitting on them. Which is something else. |
| Guys is nerdy communities are used to girls not liking them/the things they do, so they are horrible at interacting with them and think overt, cringey, sexual remarks are how you talk to somebody of the opposite gender. "Girls don't like the things I like, but she likes the thing I like! She has to like me/respond positively to my affection!". Pretty much this mentality. It exist in a lot of places, video game communities, engineering classes, especially MTG, table top gaming. Girls are a novelty for some people, it's kind of sad honestly, because you can't be a girl a some communities unless you're an asshole. Even if you have a boyfriend, guys will still be totally obnoxious. There's a difference between flirting and sexual harassment. I play MTG and have a female friend who does. playing in tournaments, the way other players interact with her is gross. I watch these people thinking "why do you think this is an acceptable way to behave?". Yes, this is obviously a generalization and not everyone in those communities is like that. It really depends how people are treating you. I have no idea what your experience is like, it sounds like a bunch of thirsty guys who want attention from a real grill. They're doubting your gender because they're worried the person is guy, which would be a waste of their time. If they wanted to do anything other than flirt and be obnoxious, they wouldn't care. |
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| It's sadly relatively normal on the internet but it's not objectification, it's plain and simply social awkwardness of people who are not used to talking with girls. Just ignore them or report to the admins of the sites in question if the content violates some rule. Don't let the positive aspects of your internet routine be affected by this annoyance. For instance leaving Twitter seems like an absurd thing to do considering that you can block accounts or lock your own. A lot of forums allow to blacklist or to put on ignore. Anything before leaving a site you can and want to make a good use of just because there is an idiot bothering you. |
| 1) block them you dont have to abandon shit you enjoy because of people your limiting your self 2)its the internet if your a girl your gonna get hit on its not that guys dont get hit on either no one is safe 3) if it bugs you that much dont announce your gender in a blog or make any hints towards |
| I think most men think they're just paying you a compliment when they flirt. A lot of people can be WAY too forward though. Personally, I'm always a little hesitant to pay anyone a compliment on their looks (on the internet or IRL). It can very easily come off as creepy, but most women like being told that they're beautiful. If someone does try to hit on you and you're not interested, just let them know that you're not interested and try to take it as a compliment. I know there are guys out there who will go way too far with it, but I like to think most men are just trying to be nice (but lack the social skills not to come off as creepy). |
HikiMaru39 said: I think this idea is what OP is getting at. The context determines whether certain kinds of attention/communication are appropriate. Flirting is neutral in itself, but it is inappropriate in the wrong context — ie. while you're trying to eat breakfast, or do homework, or blog about anime, or whatever. People appreciate when you engage with them in the ways that they want to be engaged with. It's not always obvious, but sometimes it is. For example, an anime blogger probably wants readers to discuss anime with them. Is that fair to say, @invisiblestorm?I go to MAL to chill out not hook up. |
JoshMay 10, 2016 3:54 PM
LoneWolf said: @Josh makes me sad to call myself Canadian. |
| Gotta say, I'm female and I've never been particularly hit on online. But even so, unless they get all stalkery and keep it to regular flirting it really isn't a big deal i don't think |
| Rule #1: No New Friends. Don't like them? Don't talk to them! Rule #2: We don't love these hoes. Because when you love those hoes, bad things happen. Rule #3: Don't catch feels on the internet. It's the internet. It's filled with Idiots, Trolls, and teenagers undergoing puberty. Deal with it! Although...you do realize that you being what you call "objectified" can help you get some more exposure, you know? Use it! |
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| I mean, apart from the blatant self-flattery in the OP, you can't really judge all guys based on the actions of a few. And a lot of times, it's just a case of people trying to be social and girls these days, more often than not, interpret their interest as flirting when it's usually not. If such things really bother you, then just don't reply to them and they will shut up and move on. |
   I envy your delusion; I wish I could live in it  |
| If you feel uncomfortable with someone in general let them know. If you're getting a lot of attention, try to be more conservative or learn to take compliments. |
elly-sama said: orosan said: oh man, guys hitting on you, what a tragedy. for real though get over it, and im saying this with the nicest way possible, its NOT a bad thing to be flirted on, you should actually consider it a compliment that someones actually is interested in you in a sort of way. being a female myself i have my shares of "hits", but i dismiss it and know what? i survived the next day wooo! infact i met my husband as one of the guys that hit on me, man was he annoying as hell when he did it, but when it came to anime/manga topics im all ears for discussions with him and opened up a bit to being friends instead, time flew by and what ya know we're married. so what i think so far is, just because someone is hitting on you, doesnt make them a bad person. I've had men hit on my even though I told them I have no interest in men. Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people because they don't respect someone else's sexuality. So basically now you're objectifying men as well. |
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elly-sama said: orosan said: oh man, guys hitting on you, what a tragedy. for real though get over it, and im saying this with the nicest way possible, its NOT a bad thing to be flirted on, you should actually consider it a compliment that someones actually is interested in you in a sort of way. being a female myself i have my shares of "hits", but i dismiss it and know what? i survived the next day wooo! infact i met my husband as one of the guys that hit on me, man was he annoying as hell when he did it, but when it came to anime/manga topics im all ears for discussions with him and opened up a bit to being friends instead, time flew by and what ya know we're married. so what i think so far is, just because someone is hitting on you, doesnt make them a bad person. I've had men hit on my even though I told them I have no interest in men. Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people because they don't respect someone else's sexuality. There's a wide difference between men hitting on you after you tell them no, and men hitting on you without ever interacting with you before. People cannot read your thoughts. |
| WEAPONS - My blog, for reviews of music, anime, books, and other things |
| Go on Tumblr if you want to rant about objectification. Though obviously this post isn't about fixing the problem or making any sort of change, its just attention seeking. But oh well. |
| There’s no such thing as miracles, only the inevitable, the accidental and the things we do. |
| Lol I just went to check on her profile and saw that one comment that was posted 26 seconds ago.. Gawd. To answer OP's question, guys who watch anime are probably lonely nerds whom girls wouldn't want to have anything to do with in real life. They are the type to fap to anime girls every day while stalking females on social media. Basically, mentally ill creepo. |
| Honobono Log - best slice of life short -------------------------------------------- most kawaii loli overlord ---------------------------- Donquixote Doflamingo AMV - Control |
| So a lesbian feminist type apparently attempting to shame and dehumanize men for their emotional & sexual want? how original. But like others have said, other people hitting on you is a good thing. |
orosan said: elly-sama said: I've had men hit on my even though I told them I have no interest in men. Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people because they don't respect someone else's sexuality. So basically now you're objectifying men as well. Calling out someone on their bullshit is equal to objectification now? |
IJN_Musashi92 said: This makes a good point that I think a lot of you guys are ignoring when considering whether OP's examples count as objectification. Flirting can absolutely be objectification if it is based solely on the fact that the person is female and doesn't relate to who she is as an individual.it's like every male will stop what they are doing and say some shit like: Is that a Female? Oh my god it's a Female! Hey sexy what brings you here? How are you today cutie? It's like WHAT THE FLYING FUCK! I just join to play my game with friends and talk to them! It's an oversimplification and slightly ignorant for most guys to dismiss OP's concerns with "It's just flirting." I used to date a girl who lived in Boy's Town in Chicago. All the bars close to where she lived were gay bars. As such I've been hit on a lot by gay men. Many were respectful. Some were not. What I learned is that until then I had no idea what objectification was, and how uncomfortable a feeling it was. You can't really understand the (sometimes subtle) difference between objectification and flirting until you've experienced it yourself. OP's examples could definitely qualify as objectification, but isn't necessarily objectification. There are 2 sides to this issue. For guys that are generally interested, @invisiblestorm has a responsibility to be clear that she isn't comfortable with the flirtation (like Musashi suggested, though you don't have to go full bitch if you don't want to). As far as the sheer number, that's just part of being a part of a community that is predominently male. If you're clear upfront, it's a lot easier to tell the difference between objectification and flirtation. However I think it's a little absurd that so many guys in the anime community lose their shit when they find out a female is present. Reducing a person to "A girl who likes anime," however rare that may be, is just as much objectification as reducing a person to "a girl with big tits." Also, it's my opinion that objectification smacks of desperation. Or at best a lack of IRL experience. You'll never date that Anime girl if you don't have the self respect to get to know her first before throwing yourself at her. |
NeoVoltMay 11, 2016 7:58 AM
you said "Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people" , so basically every guy who hits on girls are bad people now, thats just dumb way to judge them. every husband/boyfriend are now bad people in that case, cuz majority of relatiohsips starts out with guys hitting on girls. |
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| There's a minority of lonely guys who are into anime, who jump onto any females who they have something in common. It's pretty fucking creepy, glad I'm not a girl who's into anime. |
 Anime is good, fucking deal with it. |
black1blade said: There's a minority of lonely guys who are into anime, who jump onto any females who they have something in common. It's pretty fucking creepy, glad I'm not a girl who's into anime. Yeah, because the idea of people hitting on you must be so horrible for those poor women! Don't be a cuck dude, most men would be incredibly happy with themselves if women showed the same level of interest in them simply for sharing a hobby. |
orosan said: you said "Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people" , so basically every guy who hits on girls are bad people now, thats just dumb way to judge them. every husband/boyfriend are now bad people in that case, cuz majority of relatiohsips starts out with guys hitting on girls. Read my post again. I never said that men who hit on girls are bad people, I said that men who hit on ME even though they know I'm a lesbian are bad people. I'm just stating that being hit on is not always a good thing. |
azula-is-gayMay 11, 2016 10:23 AM
| First of all getting hit on isn't something terrible if it's not annoying/creepy/stupid I don't know if i can make you feel comfortable but my female cosplayers friends constantly get hit on on facebook. I think it's because most of the guys who like anime, when they find a girl that does the same thing, start with the annoying shit like the one you've received because it feels like a jackpot: girl+anime= perfect girlfriend (for this guys) |
| Weebs will hit on accounts using avatars of characters of the opposite sex. So I wouldn't take it seriously. |
elly-sama said: orosan said: you said "Therefore I consider men who hit on me to be bad people" , so basically every guy who hits on girls are bad people now, thats just dumb way to judge them. every husband/boyfriend are now bad people in that case, cuz majority of relatiohsips starts out with guys hitting on girls. Read my post again. I never said that men who hit on girls are bad people, I said that men who hit on ME even though they know I'm a lesbian are bad people. I'm just stating that being hit on is not always a good thing. The fact that you consider yourself to be someone who can firmly judge people is just mind blowing. |
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Josh said: HikiMaru39 said: I think this idea is what OP is getting at. The context determines whether certain kinds of attention/communication are appropriate. Flirting is neutral in itself, but it is inappropriate in the wrong context — ie. while you're trying to eat breakfast, or do homework, or blog about anime, or whatever. People appreciate when you engage with them in the ways that they want to be engaged with. It's not always obvious, but sometimes it is. For example, an anime blogger probably wants readers to discuss anime with them. Is that fair to say, @invisiblestorm?I go to MAL to chill out not hook up. Yup, I do agree with what you said there. There need to be some boundaries when it comes to flirting. I don't mind people flirting and giving compliments, but it gets me uncomfortable when someone giving sexual hints. |
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| I mean, the people that would flirt on this site are the people that are not sociable to approach the opposite sex in real life. Same with YouTube, Facebook, but even more sad lol |
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twigglyfiggly said: I mean, the people that would flirt on this site are the people that are not sociable to approach the opposite sex in real life. Same with YouTube, Facebook, but even more sad lol Probably depressed, socially awkward, lonely etc And OP, you're not helping them with this nonsense. |
| What´s the Problem , you could use these desperated guys to get what you want. If i where a girl i would totally do that. No one is flirting with me :-( |
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| If you're a guy, you have to look like a god to be hit on. It's just the way she goes boys. |
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2DHeart said: I found my long-term SO that way, too. You have access to a lot more people than exist in your offline circles, so you're more likely to find people you get along with well, and sometimes that just naturally progresses to flirting if you have conversational chemistry. Of course, it's only sustainable if you click in person too.I never understood flirting online. I know my best friend met her BF that way, so I'll try to reason through it.... FlatEight said: Nah. It's true that women are hit on more, but men are still hit on fairly often for being charismatic or exceptionally funny, even if they're of average looks.If you're a guy, you have to look like a god to be hit on. It's just the way she goes boys. |
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k8bit said: 2DHeart said: I found my long-term SO that way, too. You have access to a lot more people than exist in your offline circles, so you're more likely to find people you get along with well, and sometimes that just naturally progresses to flirting if you have conversational chemistry. Of course, it's only sustainable if you click in person too.I never understood flirting online. I know my best friend met her BF that way, so I'll try to reason through it.... FlatEight said: Nah. It's true that women are hit on more, but men are still hit on fairly often for being charismatic or exceptionally funny, even if they're of average looks.If you're a guy, you have to look like a god to be hit on. It's just the way she goes boys. Exactly. Guys have to showcase their personality more if they're average looking. If they appear boring and are average looking then they won't get much attention. It's all good though. I really don't know why I'm arguing about this lol. |
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