| I just posted this rant in this thread, and thought I'd repost it here to ask you guys the question at hand: What makes kids bad? I'm not talking "I stole some candy" bad, but "I decapitated the postman" bad. My opinion is below: Me said: Most parents think their duty is to provide food and shelter for their child, that school will teach them knowledge and morals. Schools think parents will teach their kids whats right and wrong, because its not their job to preach to kids. Thats how we end up with bad kids. The only thing anime is responsible for is people staring at their monitors, laughing, crying, and fapping. These censorship moves arent necessarily made because people in high positions actually believe anime is responsible for crimes, but because they need to be seen doing something, and they're either too incompetant or have no funds to do so, so they go the easy route and censor some media which will placate the witless parents who have no idea the problem is all their fault. And yes: its always the parents fault. Eveything begins with them, they are their child's first contact in this world and their main source of 'inspiration', if you will. The problem is too many lousy parents in this world. End Rant. Whats your opinion? Are you a bad kid? Chime in and tell us why you're so evil! |
"I'm starting to think mal is run by Xinil generating electricity on a bicycle." - idklol |
| I'm not a bad kid but i can say why kids can turn bad: parents. |
| I think parents play a factor, but even if you have good parents you can still turn out bad. In my opinion its a lot of luck, it depends on where you grow up, the type of friends you happen to meet, your interests, etc. Of course, parents determine alot of that for you, but a lot of the time its out of their hands. I think the type of friends you meet is the biggest determining factor of how a kid will grow up. And no, I guess I wouldn't consider myself a bad kid lol |
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| Although I agree that environment is a big factor of what shapes a kid, an example to counter that is my own childhood. I was sorrounded by very nasty kids while growing up, but rather than follow in their footsteps I refused to, because I knew I'd disappoint my mum and what my own moral compass was telling me. I had a compass and they didnt, or if they did they werent going to follow it for various reasons. It was that simple. Refusing peer pressure isnt an easy thing for a kid, it can make you an outcast or lose friends. Both of which happened to me at the time, but I'm still glad I didnt end up like them after childhood. I think the problem is complex and simple at the same time. Bad kids simply lack a moral compass. The question would be why, and of course there isnt going to be one answer, but I do believe lack of parenting is the biggest one. Society needs to just accept that and force parents to accept responsibility, force them to learn how to be parents. When a couple becomes pregnant, there's lots of books on how to be a good parent, but maybe we've degenrated so much that we need compulsory parenting classes. Which of course will open up another can of worms. |
"I'm starting to think mal is run by Xinil generating electricity on a bicycle." - idklol |
| Can't quite say that my parents helped in the development of my personality. Although I have never been grounded, I still didn't like getting my parents mad at me. I consider my old elementary school self to have been quite a troublemaker, but after that I sort of mellowed out (read: became a loner). No idea how that happened. Internet (mainly NeoPets around that time) and eventually anime may have made it worse (not really complaining). I somewhat socialize at school, but I'm still quiet. In the end, I think I'm a good person, just not with ideal social skills. And my parents (and sister) are the outgoing type. I'm not like my mom, where I can approach people without getting nervous or do whatever to get the job done. And I'm certainly not like my dad, where I can take great responsibilities, go out with friends, and socialize with whoever. Heh, no idea what happened to me. |
AsrialysJan 19, 2008 8:06 AM
Asrialys said: Heh, no idea what happened to me. Me either, lol. Baby photos of me show me as a chubby blonde-haired kid, but now I'm a thin dude with dark hair (no bleach involved). Personality-wise, I'm nothing like any of my large family. But still, morals were instilled in me from birth, consciously or not from my mum I guess. And Jackie Chan, and Tintin. But I met my mum before those guys, so she wins. |
"I'm starting to think mal is run by Xinil generating electricity on a bicycle." - idklol |
| I was a pretty bastardish child growing up, and although part of it could be attributed to my rather....special mind, the enviroment has a lot to do with it. My parents raised me right, but elementary school was hell. Schools don't have an obligation to raise kids, and parents should try their best to spend time with their children and teach them life values and such, but if the school you go to sucks ass, and since most of us spend the better part of our young lives at school...it's gonna have an impact |
 Everyone talks about rock these days, the problem is they forget about the roll - Keith Richards |
| Kids get bad because of the environment they grow in. Society. Stress makes them to do bad stuff. You might as well watch the movie called Halloween (2007), that pretty much explains this stuff. |
Devil said: Kids get bad because of the environment they grow in. Society. Stress makes them to do bad stuff. You might as well watch the movie called Halloween (2007), that pretty much explains this stuff. Citing a terrible remake of a classic that needed no remake is not going to help your argument methinks... |
"I'm starting to think mal is run by Xinil generating electricity on a bicycle." - idklol |
Cihan said: Devil said: Kids get bad because of the environment they grow in. Society. Stress makes them to do bad stuff. You might as well watch the movie called Halloween (2007), that pretty much explains this stuff. Citing a terrible remake of a classic that needed no remake is not going to help your argument methinks... S/he is mentioning it on principle....doesn't matter if it sucks so long as it presents the basic argument and saves typing time :) That being said....original is better |
Everyone talks about rock these days, the problem is they forget about the roll - Keith Richards |
| I don't think it's just the parents at stake. Friends play a huge part, some sociologists even believe that parents play NO part whatsoever and it's all peer influence that generates sets of ethics. Personally, I'd say it's a mixture, and the people you hang out with can have a huge influence. It isn't always the case that parents can controll who their kids hang out with, the best they can do is try and rid them of naive beliefs, and even that can't always help. Bad kids come from other bad kids, and also parental neglect and conflicts, pretty much the society they come from. Though sometimes it can have the opposite effect. A pretty complicated matter, and definately not attributable to a simple set of conditions. Therefore parents don't always know what wrong steps they may take. (Who knows, it could be as much as one type of faerie tale to inspire a kid to be different, or barbie dolls to show a kid what 'beauty' is, which could much later play a major role in 'destroying' a child) personal experience: |
| It's both parents and environment. I don't know which one is most influential, sometimes kids have great parents but terrible influences at school, so they turn away from their parents. Really, it seems like a lack of expectations; parents who don't expect anything from their kids (good grades, do your chores, or other sorts of responsible behavior) and a culture that idolizes rebellious teens (James Dean, anyone?) where even adults are encouraged to stay youthful in both appearance and attitude (ever hear someone say that they aren't old enough to be called mister, or sir, or ma'am?) - basically, there's no expectation or desire to grow up. |
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| We are all affected by our environments, especially at a younger age. You can't lay blame solely on any external influence in a childs life, for what they are or what they become. Peers, school, parents, luck and much more all decide how you will turn out. However, you are your own person, and unless you seriously have been dealt a bad card in life (hint, you are posting on this forum, so i don't mean any one of you.) I can lay the blame on you if you turn out "bad", and also praise you if you turn out "good". At the end of the day its about decisions, whethere kids make good ones or bad ones, thats why I mentioned luck earlier, I think thats one of hte most important factors :P |
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| You have to be really clear about what you mean by GOOD and what you mean by BAD. Is a kid who's quiet and smart and has "bad" urges but doesn't act on them a "good kid"? Likewise, is a kid who's loud and rough and immature a "bad kid"? Or are you wanting to say that everyone who hurts another person is bad and people who try not to hurt other people are good? We all have our own understandings of what it means to be good and what it means to be bad. That said...I think every child is born with the capacity to be good. (Though there's so such thing as a good teenager. Being a teenager releases evil chemicals into the brain that turn kids - "good" and "bad" - into pure evil. Luckily, teenagehood doesn't last forever and most kids are then able to grow up and get over themselves.) Still, the things that happen to us and the way we respond to them affect our actions, which in turn lead people to be labeled as good or bad. |
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| Parents/Siblings and Peers. |
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| To me... there are three variables. The kid, the family and the peers. The baby, even at the very moment they come out of the womb has a different personality than the prior or succeeding millions babies from around the world. It may be similar to some other babies but not exactly the same. Different X, Y and Z, you can say. Then you have the parents and the peers but you guys pretty much covered that. Then... adding them all up gets you various results on how the kid turns out... So in the end, its a very difficult thing to predict on how a kid will turn out. |
| id say its mostly parents in the begining stages and then your friends/parents guidance thru highschool. i was recently at a deli with my mom after picking her up from her doctors and we were in a really rich part of new jersey. this mother and her friend already obnoxious enuf brought her two little children. they ran around the deli screaming and causing a fuss as well as just never sitting still and going up to people and interrupting their meals. i asked my mom, if i was ever like that, cause if i had a kid i certainly would know want them acting like that in public. she said absolutely not. i was glad. rational discipline i think really is an important part. you dont have to like scream and beat your kids, but i think you do need to put them in their place and let them know that stuff like that isnt okay to do. well i mean depending on whats meant by 'bad' they werent like committing crimes haha, but the kids at the deli certainly i would not have called well behaved or good kids. i think its cause their mother just never told them that they couldnt do that and just spoiled them for their whole lives. |
Frequencity said: id say its mostly parents in the begining stages and then your friends/parents guidance thru highschool. I agree. And if there's a lack of parenting, then the kids develop via the other people around them. If there's strong parenting in the early stages of a child's development, it doesnt matter what environment the teen is in, they should, with a bit of will-power, refuse to cave to peer pressure. Like in my case. I mean, the school I went to was more like a prison, the people I was around were thugs and criminals, I've been sorrounded by drugs, violence and teen pregnancies, and throughout it all I just didnt participate, even though I was asked and told to by these people. There's no catch-all theory like 'all humans suck and are violent', we're still all subjective beings, but babies and kids are like sponges, soaking everything around them, they can be moulded into anything, which is kind of scary if you think about it. Anyone seen a TV series called Dexter? Its really cool, and its about a Miami PD forensics guy who happens to be a serial killer in his spare time. He was adopted by a cop when he was a kid, and once the cop noticed the killing urges in the child, he instilled in him a code: only kill bad criminals. Not that I'm citing a TV show to back up any of my arguments*, but its an interesting (if over the top) example of the possibilities of controlling a child's thought process. Religion, is obviously the other example. There's been some good feedback in this thread, but I'm still sticking with the idea that parents, surrogate parents, or lack of parents defines whether a child will be good or bad. Everything else, like environment, affects them afterwards, but their moral compass has already been built or abandoned by the time they hit their teens. Nothing is set in stone though, everyone can change and develop, so its not like I think bad kids are a lost cause, but its important to understand the source of their problems, and I'm just frustrated at how parents rarely ever get any blame by society. We see newspapers constantly having a go at movies, music, TV, and books, but when was the last time we saw them point the finger at societies parents? Not just two individual parents in a specific case, but societies parents. Its like everyone's scared of parents, as if its wrong to blame them, because you know, they're parents!!! *seriously, telling me to look at a Hollywood movie to learn how the world works isnt going to make me take you seriously. |
"I'm starting to think mal is run by Xinil generating electricity on a bicycle." - idklol |
| what makes kids bad? i think it comes in stages. when the kid is young.... just say.... up to age 8. its the parents fault. the kid will most likely spend the most time with the parent, learning from them, using them as a role model when the kid starts to get a little older, and they spend more time at school, playing with friends..... i think the desire to grow up also makes the kid more bad. kids see the "cool big kids" (who are most likely kids who just hit puberty and have attitude problems), and they want to be like them.... the kids want to be more grown up . so here are the two steps..... bad parenting, kid wants to be "cool" and i find that if kids want to be cool too badly, they end up doing stupid things which are definitely not "cool" and then by then, theyve screwed up quite a bit. its all downhill from there. |
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| Based on how I act up to this point in my life compared to how my brothers acted at around the same time (they are 3 and 10 years older than me) I would have to say that there is no one factor that makes kids bad including parenting. While, I agree that bad parenting where the child doesn't recieve enough love and attention can more likely lead to a bad kid and more importantly a irresponsible adult, there are still kids that grew up with great parenting that turn out bad. My 2 brothers and I all grew with a similar parenting experience in the same neighborhood that didn't change much over the years and we all repsonded to it differently. I even had many of the same friends as my brother who was 3 years older than me and our teenage years were completely different. Who knows what makes kids bad. It could be parenting, their peers, or even their environment. But if you ask what made that specific kid bad, each kid could have a completely different reason leading to the conclusion that it isn't possible to pinpoint what makes kids bad. Some reasons like parenting might be more likely, but in the end there could be countless reasons why a child turned out bad. |
| When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story. |
| I think im one of the few that sees this question and fights the urges to make random smart-ass remarks... i dont see it as much as a lack of parenting rather than a lack of discipline and fear. My dad was a retired Marine DI and i knew that any time i screwed up bad enough... i had the ass whooping of my life coming... but thats just me. |
| I think it is partly to do with parenting, but then, it could be the childs built-in personality. My mum always said even when i was a baby i never cried at night, or if i wanted feeding, i'd just make hand gestures. She also said that they would sit me down on the floor and id just sit still and be quiet. I believe that i have a fantastic mother, and my father is a great person to disipline us. None of us were ever bad, and i dont think i ever was from my memories. Whenever mum sees really badly behaved children, she says "i'm so glad you were never like that. My sister, the youngest, has started being really moody and naughty, i think she is copying her friends. But i really do think its mainly to do with the parents. Alot of my friends always say 'i hate my mum.. blah blah blah' i would never say that so they must not get on with their parents either. |
hounddog said: You have to be really clear about what you mean by GOOD and what you mean by BAD. Is a kid who's quiet and smart and has "bad" urges but doesn't act on them a "good kid"? Likewise, is a kid who's loud and rough and immature a "bad kid"? Or are you wanting to say that everyone who hurts another person is bad and people who try not to hurt other people are good? We all have our own understandings of what it means to be good and what it means to be bad. That said...I think every child is born with the capacity to be good. (Though there's so such thing as a good teenager. Being a teenager releases evil chemicals into the brain that turn kids - "good" and "bad" - into pure evil. Luckily, teenagehood doesn't last forever and most kids are then able to grow up and get over themselves.) Still, the things that happen to us and the way we respond to them affect our actions, which in turn lead people to be labeled as good or bad. hahaha, qft |
| the question you're asking has to do with morality. where our morals come from is a debated issue (religion vs science, but I won't get into that one since that's not what this topic is about), but here's a good article I found awhile ago that discusses morality from a scientific view: http://www.time.com/time/specials/2007/article/0,28804,1685055_1685076_1686619,00.html it does a decent job of explaining it for only 4 pages. page 4 in particle relates to your question of "bad kids" for those too lazy to go to it, here's page 4: with that said, if you still have an interest in the subject of morality (it's one that interests myself as well), I recommend checking out some books on it (it's a well researched subject) |
 and with this post my post count has increased, making me 1 post cooler than before |
| Kinda off topic http://maddox.xmission.com/beat.html |
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| Parents should watch their kids, but what they do see also influences their thinking, but in the end, at home and where they can control it, it's up to their parents to make sure their children stay stable. Of course, there are evil people out there and then things are out of your control. |
| Usotsuki. |
| Religion!!! XD *controversial* *and joking* |
|
| wow so much opinions and so much text i have never seen so much in a post before. why am i bad.....mmmmm.....let me think......erm, bullying, this is probably the main reason i guess, i personly realized that to stop being bullied i had to achieve something that would set myself apart, i suppose it came down to power, the more power i had the more i could control how people behaved around me(think kira in deathnote), am i bad well short answer yes long answer no. you see where i grew up people who have power are in control and if you dont have power your weak and you are the one controlled, let me think, am i bad because i like to hurt people who hurt other? i supose yes, when i see a friend of mine who was raped and my 'gang' or 'crew' finally find him we exact a type of justice that is fitting for such scum, so i suppose i am a bad person because when it comes to it i dislike people who pick on the weak and they suffer at my hands and i tend to laugh when they do. so what now life is not black and white, i cant judge everyone by the same standards, what about the guy who is misunderstood and shouts screaming in the streets do i hurt him because hes angry at the world? or do i go after the quite ones who lurk in the shadows selling drugs to teenager and turning them into monsters i have no ability to understand. when i think about all the bad things i have done i find it hard to sleep, and yet when i walk down the town i was born there is a low crime rate and people are generally nice. i think to myself, yes i have sinned but for the greater good(again line from deathnote the movie). i have been the subject of racism and abuse and i take my revenge on these people, but now i am the bad person and i am the monster. so alot of people blame the parents and schools, my mother raised me well and i was in the top 3 schools in london, i went to art college and i have pursued many ways of life, i suppose when my friends beat the living shit out of somebody after they have hurt somone i laugh, and yet i find myself thinking this is wrong, but should these people be allowed to create so much pain in the world without paying for it? are they not hurt themselves? are we not simply adding to the pain? i do not know. censoring anime? well i guess yes the government has to be seen to be doing somthing about crime and it isnt really their responsibility. i wonder somtimes where dose it begin and where does it end? everyone is different one day a person you called friend is now your enemy and for what? because of hate? a belief in moral superiority? remember if kira had won and near had lost, both 'L' and near would have been the criminal, so you see its all about perspective and wether or not you have the correct one. i dont kid myself about who i am or what i have done, i know oneday sombody like 'L' will come and punish me for my crimes, but in the mean time, i will be justice in my land and on the day i come to atone for my sins i will say it was in truth because i was weak and unable to reach my fellow man that i failed and i will gladly take my punishment. whats makes kids bad? who knows? P.S if you read any of that +5000 to you you just became a level 5 mage |
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